god level spoof

() Sometimes life is like this.Very romantic, very bloody.At the beginning, you thought your life was an eight o'clock soap opera, but in the middle you may be pleasantly surprised to find that it has turned into a comedy by Zhou Xingxing.But in the end, you will have no choice but to find out that it's a Korean drama... You can guess the beginning right, but you can't guess the ending.

From the appearance of Dugu Qiubai and Ximen Chuuxue, Li Ye thought he had encountered two super lucky stars.

One is Dugu seeking defeat, a generation of sword demons who have defeated all the heroes in the world in their lives, so lonely that they only seek one defeat.And the other one is Ximen Chuixue, who is addicted to swords like his life, taking people's lives in the blink of an eye, making the martial arts people terrified.

Li Ye imagined that he would finally be able to relax. These two great gods should have noble sentiments and a great sense of social responsibility. No matter how you say it, they would shelter him from the wind and rain, and solve some troubles...

But the reality is very cruel. What he never imagined was that Dugu Qiubai is a beautiful girl, while Ximen Chuuxue is a pseudo-mother—do girls and pseudo-mothers have feelings and sense of responsibility?Li Ye really didn't have any expectations for this.

For this reason, Li Ye intends to seriously study the original work, first of all, "The Legend of Condor Heroes" about Dugu Qiubai.

Before that, Li Ye still had to comfort the beautiful girl Dugu Qiubai and the fake girl Ximen Chuuxue, because the two of them had been fighting for nearly a day, and the water in their bodies was consumed seriously, so the two immediately asked for water.

Li Ye led the two of them to the water dispenser, and pointed to the water cup in the cabinet below: "No, here is the cup, and here is water, you can drink it yourself."

The two looked at each other, then each took out a cup, and then looked at the bottled water above the water dispenser.

The two looked at each other again, the beautiful girl Dugu Qiubai took a step forward, then slowly stretched out her right hand, an invisible sharp edge appeared in the air, as if the target was the bucket of water...

"Hey, what are you doing?" Li Ye asked quickly.

Dugu girl rolled her eyes and gave him a contemptuous look: "Of course the lid of this bucket of water should be removed, otherwise, how would you use a cup to scoop water?"

"..." Li Ye was stunned, and then patted his forehead, scolding himself for being careless in his heart, Dugu Qiubai is an ancient person, how could he know how to use the water dispenser?

There was no other way, so Li Ye had no choice but to demonstrate how to pick up the water himself, and pointed out which side was cold water and which side was hot water, and then returned the water cup in his hand to Dugu Sister, saying in his mouth: "Remember, if you pick up water Don’t drink the boiled water right away, it will burn you.”

The beautiful girl Dugu Qiubai looked at the water dispenser curiously, was amazed by the magical power of the thing in front of her, and asked, "What's the name of this thing, how can it have such a mysterious function?"

Ximen Chuuxue sighed unwillingly: "Yes, I guess even the old emperor in Ouchi doesn't have such a spiritual baby."

Faced with the two people's praise of an ordinary water dispenser, Li Ye didn't feel amused. Ximen Chuuxue, after all, no matter how strong their martial arts are, they don't have the ability to predict the future.

Li Ye thought for a while and asked, "By the way, what are your names? I don't know yet, so please tell me."

"Lonely seeking defeat."

"Ximen Chuixue."

The names they answered made Li Ye doubtful. Could it be that the name of the fifteen or six-year-old Dugu Qiubai?But he naturally wouldn't show it on his face, but smiled lightly: "Qiu Bai, and Brother Chuixue, I'm Li Ye, how did you get here when you first came here, if you don't understand, just ask me, I will know everything, There are endless words."

After all, Li Ye quickly turned on the computer and searched for the sentence in The Legend of Condor Heroes that describes Dugu Qiubai:

The frontal description is: "The sword demon Dugu Qiubai is invincible in the world, but he buried his sword here. Woohoo! The heroes are tied, and the long sword is empty, so sad!"

On the side, it is described through several swords of Jianzhong: "Sharp and fierce, invincible, before the weak crown, it was used to compete with the heroes of Heshuo. Ziwei soft sword, used before the age of 30, it is ominous to accidentally injure a righteous man, so it was abandoned in the deep valley. The epee has no edge, and great skill does not work. Before the age of 40, relying on it is rampant in the world. After the age of 40, it does not stick to things, and plants, trees, bamboo and stones can all be swords. Since then, Jing has practiced gradually to the state where no sword is better than a sword."

After reading these paragraphs, Li Ye couldn't help frowning. No matter from which angle he analyzed it, Dugu Qiubai should be a man, but why...

The best proof of Dugu Qiubai's gender is the phrase "Before the weak crown, use it to compete with the heroes of Heshuo". In ancient times, the weak crown refers to a 20-year-old male.

Li Ye, who couldn't figure it out, finally shook his head. It seems that he can only slowly understand...

Looking at the time, Li Ye planned to go grocery shopping, and it was time to prepare dinner.

After going downstairs, Li Qiang and his wife stepped forward and asked, "Xiao Ye, how is it? Did the two heroes upstairs fight for the victory, or plan to teach you some magical skills or something."

Regarding the visit of Ximen Chuuxue and Dugu Qiubai, Li Ye will naturally not hide his father and mother, and the position of his family in his heart is beyond doubt.

Li Ye smiled complicatedly: "How should I put it, um, I actually can't believe it myself, forget it, let me confirm first?"

"Oh, by the way, I'm going to buy vegetables, those two guys above, you can take it easy."

After explaining something, Li Ye immediately went out and headed for the big vegetable market not far from home. He must pay more attention this time.

Li Qiang and his wife looked at each other. They didn't understand what Li Ye meant, but they naturally understood the following sentence: "Haha, it seems that the food tonight will be very rich."

……

In the innermost iron fence of the Beibei Mental Hospital, an ugly old man was sitting on a broken chair. He tapped on Erlang's leg. A slipper was dangling on one of his thumbs, and he was holding a cup in his hands. A piece of "Jiangnan Evening News", looking at the information on it with the same expression.

Needless to say, the identity of this old man is the Fire Cloud Cthulhu.

Since coming to this world yesterday afternoon and entering the psychiatric hospital under the leadership of Li Ye, Mr. Cthulhu immediately slipped out without anyone noticing at night, and then, without disturbing anyone, I took (sweat~) more than ten different newspapers.

Oh, by the way, Mr. Cthulhu felt a little hungry on the way, so he took a few roast geese, a few catties of beef, a few bowls of chaos... and then returned to his own iron fence.

In one day, Huoyun Cthulhu had a general understanding of the current situation of this society, and it seemed that the masters of this era were all extinct.

"Tch, it's really boring. I want to kill a real master. Where can there be a master?"

Huoyun evil god muttered in his mouth, his expression was ferocious and terrifying, and then he grinned slightly at the corner of his mouth, and smiled strangely: "That kid is really a martial arts prodigy, maybe one day he accidentally opened up Ren Du's second channel, even I am not him What about my opponent, but fortunately, I know the long-lost Ha Toad Kung Fu, which can keep me invincible..."

"Ah~"

Huoyun Cthulhu stood up from the chair and sighed: "Life~ is really lonely like snow, ah~";