Learn some wonderful questioning techniques, mind reading techniques, and psychological control tech

Chapter 112
Medium: Mind Reading: Knowing and Influencing Those Around You Without Knowing It
Chapter 7 Mind-reading exercise 7: The social code of the Enneagram
Section [-] Achievement-oriented personality: Fear of intimacy should be moderate
Aspects of mind reading:
What kind of person is an "achievement personality"?
Wonderful interpretation of mind:
As the saying goes, "Once a stranger, twice acquaintance, three times and four times a friend", but it is useless for achievers.They believe that the outside world is full of dangers and violations, and the best way to protect themselves is to maintain a safe distance from the people and the world around them.They always look like they are unwilling to have a deep friendship with others, and they have a habit of communicating with anyone that "friendship between gentlemen is as light as water".

Since achievement-oriented personalities have a protective net for themselves, making it difficult for people to get close to them, when making friends with such people, you must know how to keep a distance, and don't let the habit of "self-acquaintance" destroy the harmony and nature between each other Relationship.

In fact, in many cases, friendship with a certain distance is easier to maintain, because if people get too close, it is easy to cause friction because of mutual understanding; if they are too distant, the friendship will fade.Therefore, keeping a certain distance, neither too close nor too distant, is the best "preservation method" for friendship.

The bracken and an unknown flower not far from it are good friends.Every day at dawn, Bracken and Nameless Flower greet each other with their throats open.As time goes by, they all regard each other as their closest friends.At the same time, the two found that it was inconvenient to talk at the top of their voices every day due to the distance, so they decided to move closer to each other.They think that the closer they are to each other, the easier it is to communicate and the deeper the relationship.

So, the bracken desperately expands its branches and leaves, it grows vigorously, the stretched branches and leaves are like a big umbrella, and the nameless flower tries to tilt its stems and branches towards the direction of the bracken, and the distance between them is getting closer.

Unexpectedly: because the branches and leaves of the bracken are like a big open umbrella, it not only blocks the sunshine of the nameless flower, but also blocks the rain and dew of the nameless flower.The nameless little flower that has lost the moisture of sunshine and rain is withering day by day. When it is sad, it no longer shares friendship with Bracken. On the contrary, it thinks that Bracken has bad motives and intentionally murdered itself, so it hates Bracken in its heart.

As for the bracken, because the branches and leaves were too lush, after a storm, many of its branches and leaves were broken, and its body was bare.Looking at herself covered in bruises, Bracken blamed the nameless flower for all the consequences. If it wasn't for the nameless flower, it would never let its branches and leaves grow wildly.

Thus, a pair of good friends turned against each other.

From this story, we see the importance of distance.In fact, distance is a natural attribute of interpersonal relationships, and even the closest friends are no exception.Being able to be good friends only means that they have common goals, hobbies, opinions and spiritual communication in some aspects, but it does not mean that there is no distance between them and they can be integrated as one.If you are too close, you will sometimes be stabbed; if you are too distant, you will not feel the warmth of friendship. Only by grasping the distance of getting along well can the tree of friendship be evergreen.

For example, when you are going to visit someone, try not to be an uninvited guest, but try to say hello to the other party before going; if you find that the other party has a subtle sign of being busy during the conversation, you should end the conversation as soon as possible. Get up and leave; don't ask people's family situation endlessly during the conversation like checking household registration; don't mess with people's things, etc.

Some people think that as a good friend, you should share the blessings and share the difficulties. In fact, it is not the case. Although there are more opportunities to meet and communicate with each other than other people, there should be a limit. Beyond this limit, what you get is Not friends anymore.

(End of this chapter)