let me look at you

Chapter 15 Who Has Never Had Such a Dream (1)
She wanted to shout loudly, laugh loudly, and run, but she just shed a tear, and before it slipped down, she was evaporated by joy.

Feiming has watched "Don't Talk to Strangers", and she knows that it is wrong for a little girl to strike up a conversation with someone she doesn't know, and at this time, she has no interest in talking to anyone.

Aunt Ju Nian said that if you don’t want to talk to a person, the best way is to treat him as if he doesn’t exist on this earth, as an invisible person, as water vapor.Feiming also plans to do the same, but her dan is far from as high as Ju Nian.When the "water vapor" smiled slightly behind her body, she finally couldn't help turning her head to look curiously.

The moment she saw the person who came, Feiming rubbed her eyes. After she confirmed that the person who came was not blinded by her eyes, a sense of shame of being caught after telling a lie surged in her heart, as if She just said plausibly that Zhang Li was beaten by her mother so that she couldn't go to school, and Zhang Li appeared at the door of the office in high spirits.She put her hands behind her in a little embarrassment, watching the man whom she accused of being her father yesterday slowly approaching her, not knowing what to do.

Of course, Feiming wouldn't notice it at all, and Han Shu thought a thousand times in his heart, what should be the first sentence he should say when facing this strange girl who might be in his blood.

"I bet you saw me at your door yesterday morning. Are you hiding behind the curtain?" Han Shu squatted down, trying to keep his eyes parallel to the girl. He didn't really know how a ten-year-old child should What does it look like, but I subconsciously feel that this little girl is a little thinner. If she grew up in a healthy family with both parents, maybe she should be stronger than she is now.

Sure enough, he saw me peeping, so he must know that I used him to deceive other students!Feiming's face slowly turned red, and he held the badminton racket behind him tightly with both hands, but he still weakly retorted: "I didn't peek, but... just took a look, and my aunt knows."

"Your mother, no, I mean, did your aunt tell you who I am?" Han Shu actually wanted to know how Xie Ju Nian would explain what happened yesterday morning to this child, but he also felt that he cared This question seems a little ridiculous, fortunately the other party is just a child.

Feiming thought about it for a while and said, "Auntie said you are alone."

Han Shu's smile froze, he slandered Xie Ju Nian ten thousand times.This woman, she can fool children, of course he is a human being - is it possible that, in her view, he is just a human being who can walk upright, that's all?

"What else did your aunt say about me?" He continued to ask with a smile.

Feiming shook his head. Even if she was killed, she would not take the initiative to speak out. The aunt also said, "He is not your father."

"Really?" Han Shu felt uncomfortable, but at least Xie Junian didn't say that he was a bad person in front of the children, so he brazenly hit the snake with the stick, "It's actually like this, I was your aunt's former son friend."

But Han Shu did not expect that the children nowadays are so vigilant.

"Are you my aunt's friend? Why have I never met you? Then let me ask you, what is my aunt's blood type and constellation, what is her favorite color, what fruit is her favorite, and what TV series do she like to watch?" "

Of course, Han Shu refused to admit that he knew nothing about these issues, and it was still possible to convince a child that he was confident.

"Your aunt and I haven't seen each other for many years, so you haven't seen me. When we met before, we didn't like constellation blood types."

"It's a lie, my aunt said that she was very good at reading constellations since she was a child—"

"Ahem, I know her name. Your aunt's name is Xie Ju Nian." He searched his brains to find out what he knew about Xie Ju Nian. "Your aunt graduated from No. [-] Middle School in the city. I went to the same school as her." Grade. She taught you badminton, right? We played together before."

"My aunt never played badminton."

"Ahem, it must be true that your grandfather was the driver of the Municipal Procuratorate."

"Grandpa? I don't have a grandpa."

"I mean your aunt's father."

"Oh, you said my father-in-law. I only met him once. My aunt said that my father-in-law played chess at the gate of the house."

Han Shu felt that he had to use his trump card, although he never thought that he would use this trick helplessly.He took out his inspection badge: "Look, uncle is a prosecutor, and the people's prosecutor will not lie."

Feiming held the badge with Tiananmen Square and the five-pointed star in his hand suspiciously: "What do prosecutors do?"

"Prosecutors... Prosecutors supervise and examine bad people." Han Shu didn't know if the child could understand.

Unexpectedly, the inspection emblem suddenly became hot in Feiming's hands, and she quickly handed it back to Han Shu, with a little panic in her eyes: "My aunt is not a bad person, she has reformed herself, she won't Do something bad again."

Han Shu felt a lot of frustration. The fact that the child was also aware of Ju Nian's past and felt uneasy made him feel sore. He lowered his head and rubbed his cheeks vigorously with both hands.

He thought that this child who didn't believe him at all would leave, but when he put down his hand, the little girl stood a step away from him, looking at him with some confusion, her eyes were very focused, and there was even a little inexplicable hope .

I don't know how Xie Ju Nian lived with a child all these years.He felt bitter even thinking about it, how could she not notice it?
"Can you tell me your name?" Han Shu gave up trying to prove his identity, and suddenly he just wanted to know if they were doing well.

The child blinked, and his sense of vigilance seemed to be losing: "Feiming, my name is Xie Feiming."

Han Shu smiled and said, "My name is Han Shu. Your name is very special. Did your aunt give it to you?"

"I don't know, but I think my dad got it for me."

"Has your aunt ever mentioned your father to you?"

"She always mentions Sinian's father, but I know that Sinian's father is not my real father. One day I will find my real father."

Han Shu understood the tongue-twister dialogue: "Have you ever wondered what your real father is like?"

Feiming shyly shook his head.Han Shu held back the act of stroking her face with his hands, and also held back the desire to tell her - "I am your father".He is an adult and a rational person. He can't do things so impulsively, and he can't think about the consequences, even though he just found out a very strange thing.

Through acquaintances, Han Shu learned from the prison where Xie Junian was serving her sentence that she had been troubled by a serious illness in the first few months of her imprisonment, but the cause of her illness was written vaguely in the prison. Not enough for her to give birth to a child, but there must be something hidden in it-the prison is a complicated small society, and anything can happen.A serious illness can be written as an unknown cause for several months, so if she passes the prison medical examination while pregnant and finally gives birth to a child, it may not be unthinkable.Maybe what happened that year was not what he expected at all. If so, he really didn't know what he had to do to fill up the confusion and guilt in his heart.

He didn't want the child to notice these gray emotions, cheered up, and changed the topic with a brisk tone: "I watched you play just now, and the way you smashed the ball is really similar to when I was young."

"You also like to play ball?" The common hobbies instantly shortened Feiming's sense of distance from Han Shu.

"I'm not bad at playing, maybe we can 'play' one day."

"Okay, oh, no." Feiming's little face collapsed, "My racket is broken, I wonder if Aunt Ju Nian will buy it for me? Next Friday afternoon, the last two classes will be extra-curricular interest classes , I'm in the badminton team, and I don't know what to do now?"

"It will be fine." Han Shu comforted her, "I guess you are in Class [-], Grade [-], Jianxiu Road Primary School?"

"Wrong! I'm in Class [-], Grade [-], Taiyuan Road Primary School." Feiming corrected this uncle's obvious mistake with a smile.

"Oh... Class [-], Grade [-], Taiyuan Road Primary School." Han Shu repeated it with a sudden realization.

"It's a bad school, right?" The little girl was frustrated with her school. According to the section of her residence, she was assigned to Taiyuan Road, a school with poor teaching facilities and mostly students from migrant workers on the edge of the city.

"The middle school you studied in No. [-] Middle School is the best middle school in the city. I guess your elementary school is not far behind."

"Uh, my alma mater is the primary school attached to No. [-] Middle School."

"I knew it."

Han Shu smiled and said: "You must not know how boring my primary school was. In the sixth grade, half of the students in the class had small glasses, which were not interesting at all. At that time, I wished that extracurricular interest classes could be like You also go to play badminton, and Taiyuan Primary School is a boarding school, right? Wow, how cool, I have been looking forward to living a collective life in school since I was a child, and I really envy you."

"Really?" The child's frustration came and went quickly, "Uncle, will you really play ball with me?"

"Of course, I will teach you my best skills. You are mine... You are already playing very well now, and you are more talented than I was. But your aunt never agreed that my skills are better than hers. Okay, so, I teach you how to play, including what we said today, can it be a little secret between us... You haven't grown up enough to hide any secrets, have you?"

"How is it possible, this is our secret!"

Feiming had a dream that night. She was like the person in the photo of Aunt Ju Nian, waving her racket and standing on the podium. There was thunderous applause from the audience. Her biological parents stood proudly in the front row. Applause for her, with a smile of joy and pride on her face.When she woke up, she couldn't remember the faces of her parents in the dream. She only remembered that they were so young and beautiful, and their clothes were exquisite, surpassing any parents of her classmates. By the way, her father wore a shining badge on his chest .

It would be great if that uncle was really her father.However, even if he is not her father, she still likes this uncle. Maybe Si Nian's father loves her, but Si Nian's father always has many, many things to do. Maybe Ju Nian's aunt also loves her, but her aunt never stares at her seriously. pass her.Only this Uncle Han Shu, the love in his eyes is warm and direct, even a child can feel it so easily.

Thinking of sharing a little secret with his favorite uncle, Feiming went back to the boarding primary school and was in a good mood for several days.Although Li Xiaomeng and the others always looked at her behind her back and whispered, and deliberately laughed loudly, Feiming bit her lip, like her aunt said, pretending that they didn't exist, but she could get through it.However, Black Friday is still here. In the past, every extra-curricular interest class was the happiest time of the week for Feiming. She was the focus of everyone's attention only on the court.However, this time she didn't have the courage to tell Aunt Ju Nian that her racket was accidentally broken.

The students all walked outside the classroom, and Li Xiaomeng and the others also greeted her with a smile: "Xie Feiming, what are you still doing sitting there? Didn't you say that you are going to beat Zhang Li to your heart's content on the court today? We saw that Zhang Li was already heading towards the court. I'm leaving. You don't think everything you say is a lie, do you?"

Feiming didn't dare to argue with them loudly. She did tell a lie that day, as if her pigtails were caught by them. The bigger the quarrel, the more people would know that she was a vain liar.

"Let's go, Feiming." The one who spoke was Li Te, the most popular boy in the class.Others say that Zhang Li likes Li Te very much, but Li Te is good to Zhang Li, Fei Ming, and Li Xiaomeng.

He talked to Feiming at this time, and he used a very friendly attitude. On the one hand, he helped Feiming out, and on the other hand, he made Feiming look forward to it. Does Li Te also watch her play?

She felt hot, and said with some embarrassment: "I, my racket is broken."

"Let me see."

Li Te took the racket she had hidden in the desk from Feiming: "Ah, how did it happen?"

Li Xiaomeng and the others laughed together: "Xie Feiming, why is your racket crooked?"

"I accidentally swept it onto the iron pillar." Feiming said in a low voice.

"How about I borrow it from you?" The little boy's eyes were as bright as stars and as clear as dew.

Feiming laughed.She was too young to know that a little good-natured attention from the boy everyone liked could arouse terrible jealousy in other girls.I only heard Li Xiaomeng say loudly: "Li Te, do you want to lend your racket to a liar?"

The boy was taken aback.

(End of this chapter)