let me look at you

Chapter 99

She also had a premonition about this ending.It's just that the New Year's Eve that just passed gave her an illusion that they would live peacefully in that small courtyard and never separate.She kept telling Feiming that living people cannot talk about eternity.She herself forgot.

On the morning of the first day of the Lunar New Year, Feiming was rushed back to the No.1 People's Hospital.Han Shu's car was speeding on the joyful street, and everything around him passed by the window at a high speed. Fortunately, he didn't need to see the joy and joy on the faces of those people clearly.

Ju Nian hugged Feiming and sat in the back row without saying a word. Instead, Feiming in her arms seemed to be comforting the two helpless adults. She said: "It's just that the eyes can't see clearly. It hurts."

How can it not hurt?Feiming couldn't see his own face, it was blue and white, covered with cold sweat.She has experienced more pain, and pain has become a habit in her opinion.

After arriving at the hospital, the hospital immediately conducted various emergency inspections on Feiming.The number of patients in the inpatient department was pitifully small that day, and almost all the medical staff were busy running around Feiming. Surrounded like that, it was like facing a formidable enemy, which made the heart of Ju Nian who was waiting outside slowly sink.

The doctor's report came out very quickly, and the result was as expected. Blindness caused by intracranial tumors compressing the optic nerve is not uncommon in clinical practice. It is a matter of time before the condition is analyzed based on the sudden deterioration of the vision. Apart from surgery , there is no other way.

Sun Jinling was not on duty that day, but she rushed to the hospital as soon as she received the notice.As soon as Han Shu saw her, he squeezed into her office. In front of Sun Jinling, who was both authoritative and his own mother, he didn't care to hide the faint crying in his voice, and said, "Mom, what should I do? Say what to do!"

Sun Jinling took off her white coat and glanced at her son, "What should I do? Do you know how difficult it is to have the fourth stage of glioblastoma? To tell you the truth, I have been in this business for so many years. There are quite a few cases, and the cure rate and survival rate are very low at this stage of the disease..."

"How low is it?" Han Shu asked inquisitively.

Sun Jinling sat down without speaking, and Han Shu's glimmer of hope was quietly destroyed in this silence.His mother is a cautious person. If she keeps silent, it means that the number is really very low, so that she doesn't want to speak out and see her son suffer.

"There is always a way, Mom, there is always a way, she is only under 12 years old!" Han Shu sat beside Sun Jinling, begging helplessly.

Sun Jinling said: "Silly boy, disease treats all life equally. It will not treat differently because it is young or old, cute or hateful, poor or rich. No matter what this child means to you What, but this is the reality. Originally, I still had hope, and waited for her body to be in a relatively good state to arrange the operation, so as to reduce the risk of surgery as much as possible, but now it seems that I can't wait."

Han Shu still had no idea, and asked, "What is the probability of the operation being successful?"

Sun Jinling said: "Craniotomy must be risky, not to mention in her current condition, any small accident may bring dire consequences. As for the so-called probability, it is zero if it does not happen to her, and it is [-]% if it happens. .”

Han Shu couldn't stop thinking about Feiming's bright smile when he was by his side, and the more he thought about it, the more he felt heartbroken, and the objective and cruel judgment in his mother's words made him feel powerless.

"I can't let her die on the operating table. Mom, tell me where a better doctor is. If you can't do it in China, go abroad. I can't let her die."

Sun Jinling was not annoyed by her son's distracted questioning and negation. On the contrary, she still looked at her son gently and said in the calmest tone: "Then she might not die on the operating table, but on the operating table." on the way."

Han Shu covered his face and bent down.

"What I just said was the worst outcome. You can think of the best in everything. Don't make things difficult for yourself, son." Sun Jinling stroked her son's short hair.

"I treat her as my own daughter."

Sun Jinling hesitated to speak, and sighed, "I know you are sad, but this child is not the only one around you who needs your care. You went to see if your godmother is there, and your father, after you left the house yesterday, dinner He didn't move his chopsticks a few times, and he felt chest tightness and shortness of breath all night, and we are getting old gradually. There is no overnight feud between father and son, with your father's temper, do you want to wait for him to ask you to come back?"

"It's not that I want to quarrel with him. What do you want me to do when he speaks so absolutely?"

"Can't you just listen to him once? He won't hurt you either. Go apologize and be soft. With your sister's matter in mind, he won't really embarrass you. "

"This is the crux of the problem. It doesn't matter how you scold me or look down on me, but this time I am right. I will not give up on that case. Mom, do you want me to apologize openly, and do what you want?"

"That case is more important than your family?" Sun Jinling looked at her son with some heartache. Between her husband and her son, she was indeed in a dilemma.

Han Shu looked tired.

"It's not like this. I always feel that there must be something worth believing in and holding on to in life. It would be too sad if even this is lost."

Sun Jinling remained silent, and asked after a while, "Did you stay at her house last night?"

Han Shu laughed dryly and did not speak.

Sun Jinling sighed: "You guys, both siblings and your father have the same bad temper."

Han Shu came out of his mother's office and went back to the ward to see Feiming and Ju Nian.Feiming was connected to various instruments and tubes, but his condition had stabilized, and he was talking to Ju Nian in a low voice.When Han Shu entered, he just heard her say: "It's good to not be able to see, I don't need to see Li Te's pimples in the future. Some people say that boys who are handsome when they are young will become ugly when they grow up. It's ugly, it's ugly..."

She seemed to be indifferent when she said it, and she could only see it when she got closer, and her cheeks were full of tears.Han Shu is the same as Ju Nian, he would rather see her like she didn't care about crying when she was first admitted to the hospital, she has the right to be self-willed and vent, it's better than the current state.She was so calm that it broke the hearts of those who watched her.

Sitting with them for a long time, Han Shu realized that the three of them hadn't eaten anything early in the morning, and it was already afternoon, so he thought about going out to find something to eat.As soon as he walked outside the ward, he unexpectedly saw a woman sitting quietly on the nearest chair, that was Chen Jiejie.

Han Shu didn't know how long she had been here, nor why she just sat outside the door.Chen Jiejie was not surprised to see him, and even nodded.

"Hello, Han Shu."

At this moment, Han Shu had no demeanor at all, he blocked the door and said coldly, "What a female ghost! What are you doing here with your haunted spirit here?"

Chen Jiejie said firmly, "I'm here to see my daughter."

Han Shu was irritated by her attitude, "Your daughter? Come on, ask yourself if you deserve to be a mother?"

Chen Jiejie also stood up, "Do you want me to show you the paternity test?"

Han Shu was amazed, "Are you following me? What right do you have to conduct a paternity test without the permission of the child's guardian? It's not so easy to take the child back with just a piece of paper! If I were You and I will be more sensible, if you want to disappear, you will disappear completely, why come here to be annoying."

Chen Jiejie was not angry either, she seemed to be mentally prepared for any criticism, besides, she was always a person who didn't know how to look back after taking a step forward, and never cared what others thought.She looked at Han Shu and said, "It doesn't matter whether you hate me or not, the important thing is that I want to be with my daughter."

"You treat her like a kitten or puppy, throw it aside when you don't want it, and look at her when you remember it? You have no right to see her at all." Han Shu showed disdain.

Chen Jiejie said word by word: "I didn't say I came to see her, I want to recognize my daughter, and I won't let her leave my side in the future."

She made such a peaceful and even determined request that seemed quite shameless to Han Shu, which was simply challenging Han Shu's patience limit.He took a few steps away from the door of the ward, and smiled sarcastically, "Let me guess, the Zhou family is almost out of business. You have reached the point where you are trying to recognize your illegitimate daughter and then sell your daughter to make a living? Or is it your family? Mr. Zhou is willing to wear a cuckold and an oil bottle? Speaking of which, you really are a match made in heaven."

Facing Han Shu's harshness, Chen Jiejie just squeezed the bag on his shoulder, "Han Shu, I am grateful for everything you have done for Feiming, and of course I am even more grateful for Ju Nian. So I waited outside the door, I don't want to disturb you so soon. You guys. But I don’t know how many days are left for Feiming, and I can’t wait too long. Even if I owe Juan Nian, the child lying inside was born to me, and we are the real mother and daughter. It’s not my debt. can be offset.”

Han Shu stopped entangled with her, and said, "If you want to recognize the child, then I will see you in court."

Chen Jiejie said: "Han Shu, can you represent Ju Nian? Or can you represent Feiming? Feiming needs a mother, she chose me, and she is willing to be with me in the future, do you understand?"

"Nonsense, how is it possible?" Of course Han Shu didn't believe it.

Their quarrel outside the door actually fell into the ears of the people in the room. Feiming no longer shed tears, she opened her eyes blankly, trying to distinguish her biological mother's voice in a blurry world.Without saying a word, Ju Nian already understood, because she couldn't see hatred on Feiming's face, only nostalgia.

But she still asked Feiming softly: "Is it true?"

Feiming nodded, and she murmured: "Auntie, I don't want to part with you, but I'm not an orphan, I want my mother. I told my mother that I can't go with her right away, because I still have to spend the New Year with my aunt. I'm not here, maybe my aunt will spend the Spring Festival alone... I promised my mother to be with her after the new year, and now I'm in the hospital, if I leave the hospital, I don't want to leave her again."

After listening in a daze, Ju Nian nodded.It was she who said that the choice should be made by the child. She hoped that Feiming would do what she wanted and choose the life she wanted.She also had a premonition about this ending.It's just that the New Year's Eve that just passed gave her an illusion that they would live peacefully in that small courtyard and never separate.She kept telling Feiming that living people cannot talk about eternity.She herself forgot.

Ju Nian got up and walked out the door, interrupting the feisty dispute between Han Shu and Chen Jiejie.

"You think you have the final say on what? You haven't raised her for a day, so she will go with you?" Han Shu still refused to let go, and was dragged away by Ju Nian before he calmed down.

"What she said is true, Han Shu, Feiming wants to be with her." She took a deep breath and turned to Chen Jiejie, "The child is yours, and no one can take it away. But now that he is so ill, what's the point of arguing about it?" Meaning, let's talk about everything when she gets better."

Chen Jiejie was strong and stubborn when facing Han Shu, but in front of Ju Nian, she couldn't help but blushed, "Thank you! From today onwards, I will take care of Feiming."

Han Shu recognized this reality in disbelief, but he couldn't understand it, and continued to question: "Feiming wants to be with her, why? A mother who has never met is more important than someone who has raised her for 11 years?" As he spoke, he glanced at Chen Jiejie, "What the hell did you do, what did you tell the child?"

Ju Nian obviously also needed an answer. She didn't know what Chen Jiejie and Feiming talked about that afternoon, so that Feiming made a decision immediately.

Chen Jiejie said to Ju Nian: "I didn't lie to Feiming. I even told her that I was wrong and that I abandoned her. She only asked me one question."

"She asked why you like her?" This is not difficult for Ju Nian to guess, the same question, Feiming asked her, also asked Han Shu, but no matter how she answered, Feiming's eyes were only disappointed.

Chen Jiejie really said: "That's right, that's what she asked.

"Then how did you answer?" Ju Nian suddenly eagerly wanted to hear Chen Jiejie's answer.

Chen Jiejie said: "I told her, I don't know why I like her, maybe there is no reason at all, just because she is my daughter."

Ju Nian seemed to understand a little bit, maybe this was why she couldn't compare to Chen Jiejie.No matter how much she took care of her in these years, the answer to such a simple question was obvious, but she just couldn't answer it.Because she can't tell Feiming that she likes Feiming because the child has the shadow of Wu Yu.What is not obvious is maternal love that does not ask why.

"You can't let her bully like this." Han Shuwei was indignant.

Ju Nian said flatly: "I didn't have any blood relationship with Feiming, but now that her biological mother has appeared, I... I have also let go of a burden, which is good for everyone."

She didn't deliberately lower her voice to avoid Feiming inside, and then said to Chen Jiejie: ​​"Go in and see her, she's been waiting for you. The doctor will explain something later, you can go with me."

"You..." Han Shu didn't know what to say.

But Ju Nian smiled and said to him, "Are you still hungry? I'm hungry."

(End of this chapter)