aren't we in love

Chapter 40 Don't Remember, Because You Can't Go Back

Cheng Duanwu slept in the master bedroom, and she was the only one in the huge room. The mechanical sound of the Roman clock ticking was obviously hypnotic, but at this moment it became the main culprit that disturbed Cheng Duanwu's sleeplessness.The regular voice made her feel extremely irritable.After leaving for two years, the decoration and furnishings here are completely different.

Cheng Duan Wukong stared at the ceiling, for some reason, it seemed that something was missing in his heart.

Two hours ago, she was sitting nervously in Lu Yingqin's car.He asked her: "Cheng Duanwu, what about next? What should I do?"

She gritted her teeth and said to him, "Lu Yingqin, what do you think if I say, go to bed?" She was really anxious, she didn't beat around the bush, she just wanted to get straight to the point.

Lu Yingqin stepped on the brakes suddenly, and she leaned forward because of the sudden force. If she hadn't been wearing a seat belt, she would have almost smashed through the windshield.She stroked her undulating chest in shock, then turned her head and stared fiercely at Lu Yingqin.But the culprit was still indifferent, he turned his head and gave Cheng Duanwu a meaningful look.Then he turned the steering wheel abruptly.

Cheng Duanwu, who was still furious, pursed his lips involuntarily after he figured out Lu Yingqin's driving route.

Looking at the increasingly familiar scenery, my heart was so nervous that it raised my throat.Her hands gripped the seat belt tightly.I dare not blink my eyes.Everything went better than she had imagined.Lu Yingqin took her back to the villa on the outskirts of the city.

The white two-story building, without any change in appearance, stands quietly, facing the lake in the northwest, hidden in the rustling shadow of ginkgo trees.

She followed behind him, and neither of them spoke.The decoration in the villa is completely different from two years ago. Although the decoration is very luxurious, it is not popular at all.Cold and empty.

For some reason, Cheng Duanwu felt something different from the moment he stepped into this place.She couldn't help but fell into the memory.This house full of memories made her a little dazed at the moment.

He led her to the master bedroom.Cheng Duanwu followed behind him with his head down slightly, his hands tightly clasped together.She was clearly prepared mentally, but when the gun was loaded, she suddenly became timid.

Lu Yingqin suddenly stopped in his tracks without turning his head: "This place should be better than the hotel. If you really want to get close to me, then I will give you this chance."

"..." Cheng Duanwu didn't expect Lu Yingqin to say that suddenly.Although he involuntarily breathed a sigh of relief, his heart clenched into a ball.

All kinds of pictures suddenly appeared in my mind, like the scenes in a TV series, and finally they were fixed on the child's pale face.The blood in the whole body began to gather on the top of the head, and all the shame, resentment, and complexes turned into a puff of smoke.

She gasped suddenly, clenched her fists, and then let go, hugging Lu Yingqin tightly from behind like a desperate one.His back is broad and firm, and Cheng Duanwu purposely pressed her chest against him. She understood what it meant to a man to throw himself into his arms.

There is a hazy and ambiguous fragrance floating in the air, which is the Feelmore on her chest, and it can only be smelled clearly when you get close.She was moved, so she sprinkled perfume for both sexes.She could clearly feel that Lu Yingqin's body stiffened suddenly. He stood still in the same place without moving, and Cheng Duanwu's heart also beat nervously.The arms tightened involuntarily.After a long while, Lu Yingqin finally had a reaction. He raised his hand and broke Cheng Duanwu's shackles finger by finger, freeing himself from her embrace.

Turning around, he forced Cheng Duanwu to look at him.Cheng Duanwu looked up into his eyes without blinking, as if he wanted to see into his heart.And his face was tense, his eyes were burning, and he was very insightful, which made Cheng Duanwu a little flustered.He looked at Cheng Duanwu for a moment, but suddenly smiled softly, with the corners of his mouth raised, his expression natural and warm.

This smile made the two nervous people relax.

Lu Yingqin gently brushed Cheng Duanwu's cheeks, and sniffed lightly, "It smells good, what kind of perfume?"

Cheng Duanwu stared at him: "pheromones."

Lu Yingqin chuckled, brushing her sharp mandible with the back of his hand, his gesture was so intimate that he pursed his lips, and said lightly: "Cheng Duanwu, don't rush for quick success, you know, haste makes waste."

Lu Yingqin stood on the balcony with a cigarette in his hand.The smoke burns inch by inch, and the lingering ash is like the ashes of time, ruthlessly blown away by the night wind.The curling green smoke made his consciousness a little erratic.He stared blankly at the scenery outside, a mirror-like swimming pool, a few unknown plants blooming with bright red flowers, and when the wind blew by, a rich fragrance burst into his nostrils.Masks the pungent smell of cigarettes.

In fact, he has quit smoking for a long time. He is a very determined person. Once he wants to do something, he will never give up until he reaches his goal.For others, the pain of skinning and tearing apart seems to be unfeeling on him.

But everyone has weaknesses, and when a person reaches [-] years old, Lu Yingqin suddenly discovered a weakness in himself - Cheng Duanwu.

Taking a deep breath of the cigarette, the pungent taste that reached his lungs made him sober up a bit.

He bought this house two years ago, one south and one north of the villa in the suburbs, to restrain his desire to go back to the villa in the suburbs.He has no desire for that house, but what he desires is the memory of that house, the person who once lived in that house, and the faint breath left by that person.

When it was most difficult to let go of his inner demons, he ordered people to remove all the original decorations and reinstall them, but it was still not enough.In the end he wanted to sell the house and settle everything, but for some reason he couldn't make up his mind.

Changing a habit or giving up a business is far worse than forgetting the pain of a person.

Cheng Duanwu's relationship with Lu Yingqin has gradually been tempered into a kind of poison over the long years, a kind of poison that makes people addicted and can't stop - poppy.

He extinguished half of the remaining cigarette, and the gray ash was blown by the wind, some of which fell onto Lu Yingqin's suit. He just brushed it off lightly, and after a moment of silence, he took out his cell phone and dialed Guan Yi's number, late at night , Guan Yi's voice was full of sleepy laziness, he thought for a while, and said to the phone: "Check where Cheng Duanwu came back from, and also, check where my son is, and keep an eye on the old man by the way, I feel something is wrong."

After Lu Yingqin left, Cheng Duanwu felt a little empty.Back this time, Lu Yingqin and her were no better than before, both of them knew this very well.

At the last moment when Lu Yingqin left, he suddenly stretched out his arms to hug Cheng Duanwu, very gently, in a very cherished gesture, as if she was a treasure that was lost and found again.

To say it wasn't shocking would be a lie.The man in my impression who doesn't know how to respect others seems to have changed a bit.

His right arm was very strong, but his left arm could not exert any strength at all.This was the only thing Cheng Duanwu got from this hug.

It turned out that the rumors from the outside world were true.Lu Yingqin's left hand was really disabled.

Something suddenly broke down in Cheng Duanwu's heart.Warm tears welled up in her eye sockets bit by bit, but she didn't move, fearing that the tears would slip out.

She has never regretted what happened two years ago.The obstacles between Lu Yingqin and her have already exceeded what normal people can bear.Apart from being destroyed together, she couldn't think of another possibility.But fate is really a wonderful thing.It would be fine if two people died together in that accident, but both of them survived.

So what about those past events that were constantly cut and reasoned?How should it be calculated?

Forced into a desperate situation, she could only force herself to give up.

For Lu Yingqin, even if there was love, it was only once.

Cheng Duanwu kept warning himself: Don't recall, because you can't go back.

Cheng Duanwu woke up before five o'clock in the morning. I don't know if it's because the jet lag has not been adjusted. Whether it is going to bed or waking up, the time is very chaotic.

She asked the driver to take her to the city center early in the morning. After calculating the time, she went to a public phone booth and made an overseas call.I made an appointment with Smith, the attending doctor in winter, to talk at least once a week.This was Dr. Smith's only request to let her go home.

As soon as the phone was connected, Dr. Smith's noisy voice came from the other end of the phone: "Ashely, you're so crazy!" This was his opening line every time he called, and Cheng Duanwu was already used to it.Since making this decision, this is the sentence she has heard the most.This must be a mantra in English, Cheng Duanwu thought.

After listening to his reprimand, Cheng Duanwu asked about Dong Dong's recent situation.Knowing that it was still stable, she felt relieved a little.

Hearing her calm tone, Dr. Smith seemed unusually angry: "Ashely, are you going back to China to find a bone marrow match? I told you that umbilical cord blood is the worst plan, you can't use."

Cheng Duanwu frowned slightly: "I see."

"Ashely, wait for the child, maybe you can find a suitable match, don't act rashly, if something happens, the consequences will be very serious. Let alone whether you can find the father of the child, even if you find it, you Can you guarantee that you won’t get hemolysis? Even if you get vaccinated, you can’t guarantee [-]% safety, and you may have an accident because of it! Ashely, I will find a way to treat the child’s illness, don’t be desperate!”

"I know, you've said it hundreds of times and I know."

"No, you don't know! God! Why would I talk to you about this? I should have thought you would be impulsive!"

Dr. Smith on the other end of the phone kept annoyed and blamed himself.Cheng Duanwu couldn't bear it for a while.Her heart was sore and embarrassing, and the face of being tortured pale by the illness in winter but still trying to endure it could not be shaken off in her mind.He had to draw blood every morning, and all kinds of physical torture had left him dying.The eyes that were originally shining like stars have also become dull due to the attack of the disease.Since the diagnosis, the most he said to Cheng Duanwu was: "Mom, don't cry, I don't hurt."

Childish and innocent, no matter how great the retribution is, it should be retribution on her!She has lived so long, she doesn't know what M7 is, what is acute non-lymphatic leukemia?Why not hers but winter?
Because of his rare blood type, he couldn't find a suitable bone marrow transplant.

Cheng Duanwu always only knew that he had type O blood, but he didn't know that he was RH negative type O blood.When she was born in winter, she bled profusely because of Cheng Luoming's blood transfusion.The dilapidated hospital was as dilapidated as a clinic, with poor equipment, and all checks were sloppy, and she didn't know anything.

Until the winter gets sick.Only then did she discover that Dong Dong had inherited the precious panda blood from her body so that she could survive safely, and it was precisely because of this precious panda blood that his life was now hanging by a thread.

Simth's advice continued: "Ashely, listen to me, no man who knows your situation will agree! Don't be stupid, even if you are lucky to conceive, in forty weeks, you think Winter will definitely Can you wait!"

After a while, Cheng Duanwu took a deep breath and said decisively into the phone: "Dr.Smith, I know that everything you say and do is for my own good, but Winter is more important than my life. Seven It’s been a month, and we haven’t waited for a suitable match, haven’t we? We can’t wait any longer, even if there is only zero point zero zero hope, I will try. I can’t live without Winter.”

"..."

(End of this chapter)