Self-control: How to take control of your time and life?

Chapter 24 Making the Most Important Choice (1)
you have too many choices

What does it mean to have too many choices?Maybe you think "this is a good thing" at the first moment, but when you are really faced with the dazzling and abundant options, the actual feeling will not be so pleasant.In this lesson, we'll show you how to manage your choices and make the best decisions.

In fact, the plethora of options often confuses people.For example, Patricia Hewitt once promoted a "patient choice" program in the UK.As Britain's health secretary, the plan he developed was hailed as a "revolution" in the medical field.The specific content is: Let patients choose one of four hospitals or clinics to receive non-emergency treatment.But the results were not good, as polls found that less than 20 percent of people were interested in the new selective system.

I am not surprised that people's indifference is beyond the government's expectations.Too much choice is a real problem, in any field and for individuals—and it's amazing how quickly people reach their limits of tolerance when it comes to choices.When there are so many options, why not choose anything at all?True, in the cases summarized in the training center, this is what often happens.The most obvious downside of having too many choices is that it can be overwhelming, leading to poor decisions, or no decisions at all.

Our training consultant once conducted a detailed investigation in a supermarket in Los Angeles, and they set up a booth in the supermarket where they could taste different varieties of salad dressing.When there are as many as 30 kinds of salad dressings in this stall, about 60% of the passers-by will stop in front of the stall; and when there are 5 kinds of salad dressings on display, only 40% of the customers will stop.On the surface: the more varieties, the more customers.But when it came time to choose which salad dressing to buy, the ratios reversed dramatically: only 30% of customers who visited a stand with 3 salad dressings ended up paying, compared to 30% who visited a stand with five salad dressings on display. Bought the salad dressing before.

Clearly, stalls that offer fewer choices do a better job of converting foot traffic into sales.

Whether choosing a delicious salad dressing or other abstract options (a job, a life direction, or even whom to marry), our findings point to the same outcome: As the number of choices increases, people feel compelled to make the wrong decision. The risks also increase, making them reluctant to make any decisions.The obvious remedy is to reduce the number of choices.Several surveys have found that people faced with a decision start to feel overwhelmed when faced with 10 or more choices.But as the salad dressing survey shows, a plethora of options helps draw attention, even if it doesn't help sales.

Part of the reason is that any choice means discarding the rest.And it's often suspected that, no matter how careful they are, they'll still make the wrong choice (even gourmets are said to salivate over the dishes other diners choose).

A survey conducted by Professor Barry in Pennsylvania found that we still prefer to have choices over no choices, but this "road not taken" effect makes our happiness decrease rapidly as the number of choices increases.

We found that people who solve their marriage problems through blind dates take a long time to make a choice, and the quality of life after marriage is not high.On the contrary, those appointed marriages (such as arranged by parents) went smoothly without wasting too much energy (the unsatisfactory feeling is not much), and the average quality of life after marriage is higher than that of blind dates and free love.It's a strange phenomenon, isn't it?

There is also a phenomenon that children's toys are not as many as possible. Too many toys are not conducive to the cultivation of interest.

In the experiment, we also found that how much seasoning is appropriate for a seasoning store to sell?We compared two stores on the streets of Los Angeles, one of which sold 5 types, and the other sold a lot, with more than a dozen types, almost everything.But our investigators found that the store that sells 5 kinds of spices has better business and has a large number of regular customers who go to this store to buy seasonings every time.

Judging from the above examples, for the chooser, the more the better, the effect is not necessarily.Especially in the third example, it is easier to make money with fewer choices.For our personal choices, isn't this a kind of suggestion and verification of laws?No matter what choice you make, the right amount is the first requirement, not more is better.

sense of direction

In general, the more choices faced, the less direction people have.The sense of direction is the ability to locate the current location, determine the direction to the destination, and choose the corresponding reasonable route.Just like a car, he wants to drive from New York to Washington. If there are only two intersections ahead, he can easily make a judgment: "The road on the left is closer, and the road on the right may have to detour." When the intersection reaches four , he will have a judgment problem: "Which way is more appropriate?" He will lose the choice of the best direction.

The right choice is so important, but you will find that many people in real life are very hasty when faced with choices.A person spends much less energy on choosing his future job than on buying clothes.

Look, what a strange thing this is?Especially when his future happiness and prosperity all depend on this job.

Almost no one thinks that they are wrong, because no one will deliberately make a decision that is not good for them.The reason why they choose wrong is because they don't know how to choose.Many people think that they can't know what kind of job they are suitable for, so they have to trade back and forth, hoping to find their interests in the process, but many years have passed, and they are still confused.

So we have to choose carefully and develop our own sense of direction - to find the right direction.Otherwise, you have no idea which piece of land in this world is suitable for your growth and what kind of environment is suitable for your development.Direction is more important than speed. Before choosing the right direction, it doesn’t make much sense to simply talk about speed. Sometimes for us, waiting is better than action, because waiting itself is a process of choice.

All roads are not given by others, but the result of your own choice.What kind of choices do you have, and what kind of life you have.Your status quo today is the result of your choices a few years ago, and your choices today determine your career status a few years later.

The difference between success and losers is that the winners choose the right direction, while the losers choose the wrong direction.Therefore, we can often see that some people with almost the same foundation have very different lives because they have chosen different directions.A person who has no mission, direction, and goals does not mean that he has not been busy doing something in the past few years. He will also be very busy, but he may only be busy to meet the needs of survival.

1. Position and direction.What matters is not where you are now, but where you are taking the next step.The position determines your current height, but the direction determines your future achievements.Even if you are at the top of a mountain, if you go in the wrong direction, taking another step may lead to an abyss; even if you are in a valley now, if you find the direction correctly, every step you take is an ascent.

2. Direction and goal.Successful people and unsuccessful people are sometimes close: successful people can modify their methods countless times, but never give up their goals easily; unsuccessful people always change their goals, but never change their methods.However, if the goal is set, will this goal be achieved?Surely it will succeed?
If you only look at the target and not the direction, you may shoot the ball into your own goal.If there is only direction and no goal, you will not be able to see the goal, and you will only know how to kick the ball indiscriminately.

3. The direction is not equal to the goal, and the goal should be established on the premise that the direction is correct.Goals are an empty concept, possibly worthless, if not directed in the right direction.For example, the goal is the destination marked on the map. Only by holding a compass can we find the right direction. Without the correct direction, we may not be able to find the place to go.If there is no goal, it is like holding a compass and wandering on the road. After turning around, you will return to the original point, because you don't know where the destination is.

4. Choose the right direction.You must make choices at any time, must learn to give up, must break through one difficulty after another, and gain and feel a kind of strength in the breakthrough.Choice is a continuous process, there is no "right choice", only "choose the right direction".

Maybe you can't make the right choice, but we can make the best choice for the future.Know that whether a choice is right depends in part on what it means for the future.

keep calm and rational

(End of this chapter)