Economic Wisdom to Apply in Your Twenties

Chapter 63

Chapter 8 Section 3 It is better to go on a blind date alone
With the help of his colleagues, Xiao Chen decided to meet the girl who was said to be in good condition.For the first blind date, Xiao Chen didn't know what to do, so he took his good-talking buddy Xiao Wang to accompany him to embolden himself and be a consultant by the way.

When he arrived at the blind date, Xiao Chen felt that the girl was the type he had been looking for, and he was so excited that he didn't know what to say. Fortunately, Xiao Wang, who accompanied him, broke the embarrassing situation with his humorous words.The girl was amused by Xiao Wang's humor, and chatted speculatively with him.The blind date ended, and the girl left her contact number with Xiao Wang instead of Xiao Chen.She said to Xiao Chen: "Sorry, maybe we are more suitable to be ordinary friends."

Have you ever encountered such embarrassing things, asking your friends to accompany you on a blind date, but the other party didn't like you, but the person who accompanied you on the blind date?In fact, in the eyes of economists, there is an economic explanation for this problem.

For the sake of easy understanding, let's call the blind date person A, and A's close friend B.In this case, divide them into four situations: A is beautiful, B is not beautiful; A is not beautiful, B is beautiful; A and B are both beautiful; A and B are not beautiful.

Blind date is actually a process of judging each other and selling yourself.Any evaluation or judgment is made either with or without an on-site comparison object.Behavioral economics refers to such evaluations as comparative evaluations and individual evaluations.

The main purpose of a blind date is to sell yourself and hope that the other party will give you a relatively high evaluation.Some people are not used to being alone with strangers, or they like to bring their close friends with them for courage or to defuse embarrassment.As everyone knows, bringing a friend on a blind date is actually bringing a person to compare with on the spot.In the situation where A is beautiful and B is not, A should take B there, because in the process of comparison and evaluation, A's advantage is more prominent than when evaluating alone (that is, A goes alone).In the case that A is not beautiful and B is beautiful, A cannot take B with him, so as not to be dwarfed in front of B.

But in the situation where both A and B are beautiful or neither A nor B is beautiful, it is not as easy to make a decision as to whether to take B or not.But behavioral economists still give advice: when A and B are both beautiful, A should go by himself; when A and B are not beautiful, they should go together.

Behavioral economists have found that when people are faced with two choices of comparable overall quality, they have different effects when they evaluate them individually and when they compare them.Specifically, when both A and B are beautiful, it will be better for A to go alone.Because when meeting, the other party can only evaluate him (her) individually on the spot, at best, he can only compare him (her) with other people he or she usually meets, so that A has an advantage.And if B, who is equally outstanding, also goes together, what the other party does is to compare and evaluate, and he (she) will compare A and B, and may find that A and B still have some relative shortcomings.

And when A and B are not beautiful, two people go together and let him (she) compare between the two, so that he (she) can see the relative advantages of A and B. For A, at least there is a chance .

In the process of a blind date, appearance characteristics are easy to evaluate, and they are characteristics that are easy to evaluate; while a person's inner cultivation and knowledge level are characteristics that are difficult to evaluate.Those who talk about marriage also value the inner things such as the other party's cultivation base and knowledge.If there is a big difference between A and B in terms of easy-to-evaluate characteristics and difficult-to-evaluate characteristics, whether it should take B to go on a blind date is another matter.

If A is not as good as B in appearance, but A is obviously better than B in knowledge, temperament, knowledge and other difficult-to-evaluate characteristics, A can choose to take B with him.In this way, when you meet and chat with the other party, you can show A’s talent and temperament. Although the appearance is slightly inferior to B, it doesn’t matter—however, you can’t guarantee which point your blind date values ​​more, which is appearance , personality or family background?There are too many conditions that can be used for comparison between people. As the saying goes, "People are more angry than others." It is far more objective and rational to win the comparison evaluation than to let the other party make an individual evaluation of you.

Falling in love is a matter between you and another girl or boy. During this period, it is best not to involve too many "third parties".The pursuit of happiness requires our mature courage and courage—and if you don’t even have the courage to go on a blind date alone and the skills to communicate with strangers of the opposite sex, then you can’t blame why your fate is always delayed.

Wisdom Pieces: Four Ways to Improve the Success Rate of Blind Dates
1. The "blind date" before the blind date.You have to determine what kind of person you are looking for and what kind of requirements you have for his (her) "hardware", such as work income, family, education, appearance, etc. This is the "blind date" before the blind date.

2. Warm up.If the other party's hardware conditions meet your requirements, you can ask the contact person to leave a contact information for each other.Through phone calls, text messages, etc., communicate in advance to achieve "know yourself and the enemy, and win a hundred battles without danger".

3. The time and place of the blind date.The best time for a blind date is during the day, so that both parties have more time and can fully communicate in depth.The location of the blind date varies from person to person, but a place that is too noisy and lively is not an ideal location for a blind date, and it will also add invisible pressure to the parties.
4. Don't take the "first side" too seriously.Many successful blind daters would describe their first meeting as "funny" and "no feeling", and it was only after several meetings that the two sides had a good impression of each other.Indeed, in the vast world, the probability of falling in love at first sight is too low, and we can't be too demanding on others.

(End of this chapter)