A good dad is better than a rich dad

Chapter 12 3 On Dad's Functionality

Seeing a river, men notice its speed and water volume, visually measure its depth, and wonder whether they can cross it to reach the other side; women will pay attention to those pleasant waves, crystal clear water, and some will take off their eyes. He took off his shoes and jumped into the river, regardless of whether there was danger hidden in the water.This is the difference between men and women, so we often hear, "men are from Mars, women are from Venus".

Men are from Mars, women are from Venus.This is a classic proposition by the famous American best-selling author John Gray. The gender traits of parents themselves are an "advantage" in educating children. The masculinity, courage, and perseverance of fathers are difficult for mothers to show. Come out, if the father does not know how to use the advantages of men to influence the child, it will be counterproductive.

Learning parenting wisdom that is more in line with one's own gender is a matter of great significance for both parents and children.In the eyes of our traditional Chinese, the father is the backbone of the whole family. He is the main source of the family's finances and the decision-maker for the family's important affairs.In the eyes of children, the father is often an omnipotent "superman" role.

What does the position of "father" mean to children?After a lot of investigation and research, parenting experts put forward the following aspects and definitions for the position of "father":
Father is an important partner in children's games, and children need to grow up in games.

The family organizes a picnic, and the father often takes the children up the mountain to pick fruits and down the river to fish.From the child's point of view, only his father can accompany him on this adventure and help him in times of crisis.Even at home, fathers often use tactile, kinematic play to lift their children on their shoulders, spin them back and forth, or throw them into the sky.These actions are often dangerous, but the father's big hands and strength can make the children feel stimulated and safe, and the children "giggled" happily.

In the first 20 months, the father becomes the child's basic game partner, and the 20-month-old baby is obviously interested in and responds positively to the father's game; after 30 months, he becomes the main game partner.At this time, babies can play games with their father excitedly, excitedly, devotedly, intimately, cooperatively and with interest, and they will choose father as their first game partner.

Fathers help children form positive personality qualities and cultivate positive emotions in children.

In modern society, men's independence, self-reliance, strength, decisiveness, self-confidence, cooperation with others, and enterprising spirit are the spirit of active learning of the generation full of entrepreneurship.The father is the key factor in promoting the positive personality of the child.An ideal father usually has personality characteristics such as independence, self-confidence, self-reliance, perseverance, bravery, decisiveness, strength, daring to take risks, courage to overcome difficulties, enterprising spirit, full of cooperative spirit, enthusiasm, extroversion, cheerfulness, generosity, and generosity.

In the interaction with the father, on the one hand, the child accepts the influence and learns and imitates unconsciously; on the other hand, the father also consciously or unconsciously requires the child to have the above characteristics.If a child loses his father before the age of 5, it will be very detrimental to his personality development.The younger the child, the greater the impact.Children without fathers lack the courage to overcome difficulties, are more dependent, lack self-confidence, and aggressiveness. At the same time, they also have inseparable influence on impulse control and moral character development.

Fathers can improve their children's social skills, making them more cooperative individuals later in life.

Father is the "diplomat" who keeps the family in touch with the outside society, and plays an extremely important role in satisfying children's social needs and improving their social skills.As the child grows up, his need to communicate with the outside world increases day by day, and the father becomes the child's important game partner, which expands the child's social scope, enriches the child's social content, and meets the child's social needs.

At the same time, the interaction between the father and the child enables the child to master more and richer social experiences and master more and more mature social skills.When the child responds actively and is active in the game with his father, he is also more popular in the interaction with his peers.Because his father influenced his attitude towards communication, making him like to communicate and be more active, active, confident, and active in communication.

Fathers can normalize the development of gender roles in children, making boys stronger and girls softer.

There are gender cues everywhere in society, even toys for children, there are differences between "boys" and "girls".Fathers appear to play a greater role in the development of children's gender roles, both for boys and girls.This has to be attributed to the "intimacy" between the mother and the child: the distance between the father and the child makes the child gradually realize his gender identity in the game with the father: the father often fights with the boy, calling him "man", " Buddy", but was very gentle with the girl, touching her little face and calling her "little princess".

Fathers can promote children's cognitive development and improve their IQ and EQ.

Due to the unique characteristics of the father's personality and ability, especially the uniqueness of the interaction between the father and the child, the cognitive gains that the child gets from the mother and father are not completely the same.From the mother, the child learns more about language, knowledge of everyday life, the purpose of objects, and the general use of toys.From the father, you can learn richer and broader knowledge, such as understanding nature and society, and gradually cultivate hands-on ability and exploration spirit through operation, exploration, various activities, and gameplay.The child's imagination is stimulated and enriched, and he is willing to use his brain and have a sense of creativity. His thirst for knowledge and curiosity also develop simultaneously.

It can be seen that the knowledge and communication skills that children will need in social life in the future are all influenced by their fathers, and this influence is long-lasting and firm.People without fathers often feel uneasy, have low self-esteem, are unwilling to communicate with others, and live under pressure.It is the father who props up the sky for the child's growth, and gives him time to grow his muscles and recharge his energy before he is not able to withstand the wind and rain.Recognizing that fatherhood is the most important position in the world is both an important responsibility and the first step towards a successful education for every father.

(End of this chapter)