A good dad is better than a rich dad

Chapter 18 3 Role Models of Strong Fathers: Margaret Thatcher's Father
Chapter 33 A model of a strong father: the father of Margaret Thatcher
Operability: ★★ Difficulty factor: ★★★☆ Keyword: persistence
When the child has no idea, he needs his father to help him make up his mind.But fathers who make up their minds will deprive children of the opportunity to choose independently, so this type of education is more suitable for fathers who have always been strong-those very democratic fathers will find it difficult to accept this kind of education, even if it is very simple to operate.

The famous Margaret Thatcher, whose real name is Margaret Hidal Thatcher, said in May 1979 when she moved into No. 5 Downing Street as the first female Prime Minister of the United Kingdom: "All my achievements are due to my father's dedication to my education and training."

Margaret's father, Roberts, was a grocery store owner in a small town in England.On the day of Margaret’s 5th birthday, her father called her to him and said to her: “Children, you must remember: You must have your own opinions in everything, use your own brain to judge the right and wrong of things, and never follow others’ opinions. From then on, Roberts deliberately raised her daughter to be a strong and independent child. When she was 7 years old, her father took her to the library and encouraged her to read three types of books: biographies, history and political books.

Roberts deliberately created a frugal, simple, hard-working family atmosphere for his daughter, so Margaret's early life was light and difficult.He debated with his daughter on various issues to develop her eloquence of wit, sharpness, infectiousness and penetrating power. At the age of 11, Margaret entered Kesty girls' school.In the debate meeting of the debate club, her debating thinking is quick, her viewpoint is unique, her speech is accurate and majestic.

After entering school, Margaret found that the life of her classmates was so free and rich. They played together in the street, played games and rode bicycles together.On Sunday, they went to have a picnic on the hillside in spring.Young Margaret also dreamed of having the opportunity to play with her classmates.Once, she went home and summoned up the courage to say to her majestic father: "Dad, I want to play too." Roberts said calmly: "You must have your own opinion! You can't just because your friend is doing something, You have to go too. You have to decide for yourself what to do, don’t follow the crowd.” Seeing that she was still resentful, Roberts continued: “Dad doesn’t restrict your freedom. It’s that you should have your own judgment and have the ability to Your own thoughts. Now is a good time for you to learn knowledge. If you want to indulge in entertainment like everyone else, you will definitely accomplish nothing. I believe you have your own judgment and make your own decisions. "After hearing what my father said , little Margaret fell silent.

Roberts often reminds her daughter to let her have her own ideas and ideals.It was Roberts' cultivation of her daughter's independent personality that made Margaret from an ordinary girl to a British prime minister who had been in power for three consecutive terms and had been in power for 12 years. She also dominated the world political arena.

Although my father has always emphasized that "you make your own decisions", the words "you must think for yourself and don't follow the crowd" are actually implying that little Margaret should control her playful emotions and read more books.In the memories of the students, Mrs. Thatcher always carried a bulging schoolbag when she went to school, and liked to ask the teacher questions.This rigorous and studious attitude may not be commensurate with her age, and her father's requirements are much higher than those of her peers.

Fathers need democracy, but that doesn't mean they can't be "strong" at all.The child's own judgment ability is limited, and many things require the help of his father to make up his mind.Thatcher's father insisted on pushing his daughter to an image of independence, prudence, and decisiveness. It was precisely because he was full of confidence in this goal that he would not give in. He was strong all the way to the end and finally got what he wanted.It has to be said that this kind of strength is a narrow victory.

Because a strong father usually has a greater negative impact on the child, and may destroy the child's enthusiasm and autonomy, so the father must be cautious when implementing the principle of strength.Even if it is a father who has always been strong and strong, even if the effect he has received now is still good, he still needs to reflect on several aspects:
1. What kind of person do you want your child to be?

Some fathers themselves are contradictory. They want their children to grow up healthily, and they also want their children to study hard and forget food and sleep.Sometimes it is enough to want the child to live happily, but sometimes he complains that he does not live up to himself and is not as good as his colleagues' children.Such self-contradiction is actually tormenting the child, "What does Dad want me to do?" Many children will think about this question repeatedly in their hearts. In fact, the father himself has not thought about what kind of child he wants to raise.Going east for a while and going west for a while, being strong is tantamount to being bossy.Once the father has a clear goal, the corresponding educational attitude and method will be simple and clear, and there will be no such dilemma as whether to let the child take tutoring or let him rest.

2. In the process of adhering to one's own educational philosophy, think about whether the child knows that it is the father who is doing it for his own good, and that it is the father who loves him.The most regrettable moment is when the father's love cannot be accepted by the children.It is obvious that such good intentions are for the child, but the child feels that his father is embarrassing him and deliberately making things difficult for him.Such dominance is tantamount to punishing the child.When the father insists on his own opinion, he should also have a heart-to-heart talk with the child and tell him why his father has been insisting on it.

It is risky to be too specific about the direction of one's education, and Roberts' education might well have ended in failure had it not been for Margaret's political brilliance in her youth.Therefore, we should remind people who imitate "strong fathers" that before you understand your child's strengths and hobbies, you must carefully help your child establish a future direction.Just like Margaret later became Mrs. Thatcher, after becoming a mother, she did not choose the direction of development for her children, but she insisted on passing on the wealth she got from her father to her children, and she also asked them to do things has its own principles:
"I don't demand much from my children. It is enough to educate them to a moderate level. To teach children to know right from wrong, to learn to judge, and to be disciplined. Children often ask questions endlessly, and you must always be very patient Listen to him carefully and explain the truth. The key to educating children is not how much time you spend on them, but how much you care about them during this time."

(End of this chapter)