A good dad is better than a rich dad

Chapter 75

For the daughter, the father is the first friend of the opposite sex in her life. The father's speech and behavior gave the daughter an initial understanding of the word "man".If the father loves his daughter more and makes his daughter feel trustworthy, when she grows up, she will often look for a partner based on her father's image.On the contrary, if the father makes his daughter feel disgusted and resistant, he may deliberately go against his father's type when looking for a life partner in the future, and find someone who is completely different from his father as a life partner.

Therefore, if he wants to protect his daughter well and hope that she can find lifelong happiness in the future, father needs to use actions to tell her daughter what kind of man is trustworthy during the process of growing up.

At the beginning of the 20th century when the country was in turmoil, there was a family with three daughters who were particularly dazzling. The eldest married the richest person, the second married the most prestigious person, and the third married the most powerful person. It is the famous three sisters of the Soong family: Soong Ailing, Soong Ching Ling, and Soong Meiling.

In fact, for a family like the Song family, it is not surprising that the three married daughters are all so beautiful, because their father, Song Yaoru, is an extraordinary person.

Song Yaoru is a patriotic industrialist, and he and Sun Yat-sen are like-minded friends.Song Yaoru has three sons and three daughters under his knees. He abandoned the traditional patriarchal concept and attached great importance to the education of his daughters.When the country was still conservative, he insisted on sending his daughter to the United States to receive a newer education.

Song Yaoru encourages children to be self-reliant and self-reliant, and in the process of fully developing their nature, trains them to become Spartan warriors with Christian spirit.When the children were just toddlers, Song Yaoru encouraged them to play to their heart's content.When he was a little older, he and the children "bathed in the foothills without being lost in the strong wind, thunder and rain".Even when the family conditions were very favorable, Song Yaoru insisted on fasting regularly with the children to teach them how to control their desires.

Behind the building, he opened up a large vegetable garden and orchard connected to the farmland of the farmers, and let the children play in the garden.Not only that, Song Yaoru and his wife also earnestly fulfilled their duties as the first teachers, using their beliefs, character, aspirations, and sense of responsibility to influence and educate children.Song Yaoru likes to sing, while his wife likes to play the piano. Holding a Sunday party has become a custom of the Song family, and it is also a new arrangement for Song Yaoru to educate and nurture the children.Under Song Yaoru's education, although the three sisters are ladies, they are all generous, calm in conversation, and never shy or timid.

Mr. Song broke through stereotypes and practiced his educational philosophy bravely, making his daughters so self-cultivated and magnanimous in a closed and backward era.This is also the source of the courage and determination of the three daughters to choose their destination.

An extraordinary father is bound to influence an extraordinary daughter.But the relationship between father and daughter should not be too close.We know that there is another sensitive term between father and daughter, that is "Electra complex".This complex just confirms the special influence of fathers on daughters.If a girl is unable to achieve psychological separation from her father in the process of growing up, and as a result not only alienates her relationship with her mother, but also seriously affects her normal communication with men of the same age and even her marriage and love.

Electra girls are always looking for a father-like lover intentionally or unintentionally, but even if they find it, getting along will become a problem, because Electra girls are mostly introverted, delicate, willful, and often have sexual resistance.Therefore, when a father spoils his daughter, it is best to maintain a certain degree. Although she is your daughter, she is also a "young lady". It is best for the father to reduce the extent and frequency of physical contact and play.

Girls who lose their father's love prematurely often transfer their feelings for their father to a certain character in reality, and this character will become a substitute for their father. This is also a manifestation of Electra, which is not conducive to the normal life of daughters .

How to protect the daughter's body and mind without making her feel extremely dependent is a homework that every father needs to do.The suggestion of education experts is that on the one hand, it is necessary to show up to the daughter in a timely manner when she needs it, to help her solve the problem and let her feel the love of the father; on the other hand, it is necessary to properly conduct gender education and tell the daughter that men and women are different.American education experts attribute the influence of fathers on their daughters to several key words: leadership, courage, and persistence.If the standards of these three words are met, the father can be regarded as a qualified father.

(End of this chapter)