It's a pity I still love you

Chapter 25 It's a pity that I still love you (2)
Ran Zhimo hugged her gently, "You are wrong, I have been thinking about you since you left."

He felt her body stiffen obviously, and then she pushed him away, smiling very reluctantly, "Let's go in."

He understood her deliberate avoidance, he thought, he waited for her.

After that, I stayed at home for a few days. Whenever I saw the Chinese cabbage in the corner of the kitchen, I always couldn't laugh or cry. The two of them were like mice in the winter, nesting in the hole and eating the stored grain.

At first, Ran Zhimo also said that he wanted to make sick meals for Liu Nian, but it was probably because he hadn’t been in the kitchen for a long time, and he made a mess in the kitchen, but he still had perseverance and determination, so he insisted on making it himself, and Liu Nian persuaded him. After a long time, she managed to persuade the old man out of the kitchen, and she simply started cutting vegetables and lighting the fire to cook.

Suddenly someone hugged her waist, she was startled, his breath was tickling in her ears, his voice was a little hoarse, "Liu Nian, from now on, you cook for me every day!"

She was startled, and didn't respond to him for a long time. He refused to let go, and insisted on waiting for her answer. However, a strange smell came, and she finally made a sound, but she screamed: "Oops! The food is mushy!"

She quickly turned off the fire, and he had to let her go to deal with the mushy dishes. After a busy process, the two of them finally had their meal. She didn't speak, and he didn't force her anymore. The two of them were extremely quiet.

She understood what he wanted, he wanted her promise, she wanted her to truly let go, but even she herself didn't know what they were now, let go, how could it be so easy?
After eating, Liu Nian sat on the sofa, Ran Zhimo came over to hug her, she dodged for a while, then dodged again, but she couldn't dodge, so she had to put her hand on his shoulder and shake it vigorously twice , and then imitating the roar of the Hedong lion, shouting at him: "Go wash the dishes!"

"... "

When sleeping at night, Liu Nian lay on the bed sideways facing the window, her body was a little stiff, she didn't dare to move, she had to say that she was very nervous.

The person behind suddenly reached out to embrace her, and she became more and more afraid to move. Ran Zhimo felt her nervousness, and while pulling her into his arms, he said softly, "Liu Nian, I just want to hug you."

He really just hugged her for a whole night, she was his lost and recovered treasure, he didn't dare to let go, afraid that she would run away if he let go.

As if it was a fragile item, he was almost humble and careful, and only wanted someone to accompany him.

With her in his arms, he slept very well, but she couldn't fall asleep for a long time. Turning around, she looked at his sleeping eyes. She reached out to touch his face, but her fingers were only an inch away from his face. She painted his eyebrows and eyes through the air.

When Ran Zhimo woke up the next morning, there was nothing around him, he was startled, he hurriedly got up and ran to the kitchen, and saw that Liu Nian was there.

He finally breathed a sigh of relief, leaning on the door frame, watching her busy, his heart became softer inch by inch, a feeling called satisfaction was flooding, he thought, for a lifetime, this would be fine.

After cooking for several days in a row, Fleeting Nian finally gave up, stopped work very seriously, and took the initiative to order takeaway, but this involved another issue at the same time, which was the issue of who would wash the dishes, which was originally just to show To be fair, she suggested rock-paper-scissors to solve the problem, but she didn't expect how she would lose in the game. Ran Zhimo sympathetically touched her head, and then actually agreed with her to wash the dishes. question, so he clutched his stomach and screamed, "It hurts so much..."

Ran Zhimo really thought that her old injury had recurred, so he hurried over to help Liu Nian, and asked anxiously, "How is it? Let's go to the hospital!"

go to the hospital?Why is she going to the hospital well?
Fleeting Nian hurriedly shook his head, "No need, I'll just rest for a while, you go and wash the dishes!"

Ran Zhimo finally realized that something was wrong, "Liu Nian, don't you want to play tricks?"

Liu Nian smiled, "How can this be called cheating? This is reasonable laziness. You are the best, Zhimo, and you will understand me, right?" She tiptoed and gently touched Ran Zhimo's face. kissed.

In fact, it was only out of an instinctive reaction to get cheap and good-looking, and it was only after the kiss that they realized how inappropriate this action was. During this period of time, there always seemed to be something between them, and they could also joke and fight, but they each There is a limit, but the actions just now have crossed that line.

The result is that after six years of hard education in reality, it is not easy to take advantage of dyeing and ink. Although he finally washed the dishes, it was already the next day. At that time, Fleeting Years had already been tossed by him I can't even wash the dishes.

After Ran Zhimo finished washing the dishes, he prepared breakfast in a good mood. He entered the room and looked at Liu Nian lying on the bed half asleep, and said with a soft smile, "Get up and eat."

Fleeting Nian didn't even have the strength to curse out loud, but just cursed silently in his heart: "Eat your head!"

Ran Zhimo's cell phone rang at this time, and she heard his footsteps gradually getting farther away, even though his voice was very low, she still heard him call: "Mom."

No sleepiness at all, Fleeting Nian got up, dressed and left the room, the breakfast he had prepared was on the dining table.She took a piece of bread and slowly smeared jam on it. After a while, Ran Zhimo came over with an unfriendly expression on her face. She guessed what his mother was talking on the phone just now.

"Why did you get up?" Ran Zhimo hid his unhappiness and asked with a smile.

Liu Nian took a bite of the bread, swallowed it, and said, "The deputy secretary told me to get up and eat, so I have to show some face!"

His smile disappeared, he just looked at her seriously, but she laughed, "Really, you haven't been fired yet, have you?"

"No."

She gave a long "oh", and he asked, "what's the matter?"

"What's the matter?" Fleeting Nian made a shrew look, "Go to work for me tomorrow! Stay at home every day, treat yourself as a retired veteran cadre!"

Ran Zhimo saw through Fleeting Nian's intentions at a glance, "Have you guessed what the call was for just now? You don't need to help her speak!"

Liu Nian showed a strange expression, "Who did I help? If you are fired and laid off to work at home, who will support me?"

Ran Zhimo was moved by her word "nurture", embraced her, and said with a smile, "Okay, I will support you."

The competition for the new secretary of the municipal party committee is very fierce. Wu Baoguo tried his best to get this position. He worked more seriously than ever before, and he didn't leave the office until eight o'clock in the evening. , to Ran Zhimo, nothing in this world is more important than that person at home.

The story of Wu Baoguo's hard work quickly spread. Ran Zhimo's father found him more than once, but no matter what he said, his behavior remained the same.Liu Nian naturally also heard about this, and asked him while watching TV in Ran Zhimo's arms at night: "Is the city going to elect a new secretary of the municipal party committee?"

Ran Zhimo gave an "en" indifferently.

Liu Nian asked again: "Does the secretary of the municipal party committee have a higher salary than the deputy secretary of the municipal party committee?"

Ran Zhimo looked down at her, and said "En" again.Fleeting Nian kicked him, "'en' what 'en', such a good job, hurry up and fight for it!"

But he carefully watched every change of expression on her face, "Did my parents look for you?"

Liu Nian kicked his leg again, "You think it's a drama of bitterness? My parents came to look for it, why did they come to me for nothing?" Then he continued: "Hey, I mean it, you must be a member of the municipal committee. Secretary! Last time when I went to your place with the word Su Shi to find you, I met a man named Wu Baoguo once, if you can't even handle him, don't come back to see me!"

He was a little helpless, rubbed her head and said: "Fleeting Years, things in the officialdom are not that simple."

"so what?"

"I'm tired, fleeting time, I just want to be like this now."

She didn't speak, but buried her face in his chest, she listened to his heartbeat quietly, she understood what he wanted to say.

But there are some things that cannot be avoided. Even though Ran Zhimo was too lazy to argue with Wu Baoguo, Wu Baoguo came to provoke them.

The cause of the incident was a report in the newspaper titled "Ex-Girlfriend Becomes Today's Lover", with a photo of Liu Nian and Zhi Mo behaving intimately attached to it.

This is one of the most unbearable things for Ran Zhimo. Using the word lover to describe fleeting years, many reporters came to interview Ran Zhimo. Ran Zhimo only said one sentence: "Su Liunian has never been to me. Just an ex-girlfriend."

Within a few days after that, the newspaper published a report that Wu Baoguo had taken care of three lovers. As a result, Wu Baoguo's image plummeted, and he was expelled from the party due to his life style and had to be investigated.

In this competition, Ran Zhimo won cleanly.

On the day he received the appointment, Liu Nian took him out for a big meal. She ordered a lot of expensive dishes, but when the dishes came, she picked up the dishes and was about to put them in her mouth, but her stomach was churning , she hurriedly put down her chopsticks and ran to the bathroom, she suddenly had a bad feeling, she looked at herself in the mirror, and couldn't laugh anymore, it was like a goblin being beaten back to its original form, there was nothing she could do .

Back at the restaurant, Ran Zhimo asked her what was wrong with concern, and Liu Nian shook his head and said, "It's nothing, I'm fine." But in fact, nothing could be worse than this.

She went to the hospital for an examination, and the result of the examination was that she was two months pregnant.Covering her mouth and about to cry, she grabbed the doctor and asked, "Can I knock it out now?"

About a week after the abortion, Liu Nian went to the hospital without telling Ran Zhimo, sat on a chair, and waited for the nurse to call him.

In a daze, she heard someone calling her: "Su Liunian."

She stood up, her mind blank, she couldn't even remember why she did this, she just knew she should.

She gently touched her belly with her hand, but she was still reluctant, but there was no other way except this.

Her arm was suddenly grabbed by someone, she was startled, she turned her head to look at the person who came, it turned out to be Ran Zhimo!
He just told her last night that he had an important meeting today, but now, how could he appear here?

"What do you want to do?" She heard his voice trembling, as if he was afraid of something.

Tears were about to flow out, Liu Nian raised her head, not to let the tears flow out of her eyes, she said seriously: "Abortion."

He couldn't control his emotions anymore, he held her tightly, no matter how hard she struggled, he refused to let go, he dragged her away from the hospital, stuffed her into the car and took her home.

The quarrel was the worst ever. For the first time, he asked her why she didn't tell him she was pregnant, why she had to go to the hospital alone for an abortion, and why she didn't want to keep the child?

She covered her face with her hands, tears leaked from her fingers, "How do you want me to keep it?"

"Ran Zhimo, do you really think that after my mother died, my father died, and Luo Luo died, we can go back to the beginning?"

There is no other reason, just such a sentence, there is no room for change.

He knew it all along, but he still held on to that sliver of hope that couldn't be more slender and refused to let go; she knew it all along, but she was still greedy for the warmth in his arms, and wanted to let it go even if she had an abortion without telling him. The illusion of happiness can last longer, but now, it is no longer possible.

She hugged her knees and cried loudly until she lost her strength. He wanted to comfort her, but he couldn't do anything. Looking at her, he never felt so powerless.

After a long time, he heard his own voice: "Is there really no room?"

Her voice was weak, but she was so firm: "No."

After a long silence, she heard him say: "Then, tomorrow, I will accompany you to the hospital."

She was startled.

"Seeing you come out of the hospital, I will leave."

On the last day, Ran Zhimo didn't go to work, he stayed at home with Liu Nian watching TV, cooking with Liu Nian, and washing dishes with Liu Nian, most of the time they were silent, the only time they spent together was, Precious and unbearable, at night, when they were lying on the bed, he hugged her tightly from behind, and didn't fall asleep all night, he wanted to never let go, but there would always be dawn.

After eating, they went all the way to the hospital. The two of them were silent at the same time. In the end, she opened the door and got out of the car first. He grabbed her hand from behind and gave her something. She turned her head and saw that it was a pink Colored heart-shaped locket.

"I happened to see it when I went to the mall a few days ago. I bought it when I thought it was very suitable for you. You can keep it as..." He took a deep breath, "Just keep it as a souvenir."

Tears filled her eyes, and she didn't even dare to blink, "Is this a breakup gift?"

He tilted his head, even looking at her became a matter of courage, "You say yes."

"Then thank Deputy Secretary Ran, but you see, we have known each other for so long, and I still have to go for an abortion for you, so you are not at a loss."

She is humiliating herself again!
He suddenly turned his head to look at her, but she had already closed the car door and walked to the hospital across the road. He kept looking at her until her figure disappeared into the cold building, and he kept looking at her. direction of disappearance.

He thinks he understands that some things can't be undone from the moment he made a mistake, and after that, the harder he tries to recover, the more wrong he becomes.

After entering the hospital, Liunian went to the obstetrics and gynecology department. The nurse took her into the operating room. Liunian was lying on the cold operating table. The light from the operating light above stung her eyes. She stretched out her hand to touch her lower abdomen. How much she wanted to keep this child, it would be the best testimony of their love, once this thought popped up, she could no longer suppress it, she closed her eyes slightly, and told herself, as long as she never let him go Ran Zhimo knows the existence of this child, so she can keep this child. This is not a relationship between them, this is just her own child.

The doctor was ready to start the operation, but she suddenly sat up, "Sorry, I don't want to do this operation."

She stayed in the hospital for nearly an hour before slowly walking out. She has not been in a good condition for the past few days. Even if she doesn't have to pretend, she is weak. On the road, she saw the dyed ink in the opposite car at a glance. Such a distant glance may be the last time they look at each other in their lives, and they will never meet again in this life.

She turned around and walked slowly along the road to the corner of the road, a little closer, and then, turning around, she was sure that he would not see her again, and finally couldn't help squatting down, hugging her knees with her hands and shrinking up, crying The bleeding was very fierce, she bit her lip, not wanting to cry, but in the end, she still burst into tears.

There were people coming and going on the road, no one knew why she was crying, and no one would know why in the future, just like she would never know, at that time, Ran Zhimo was also crying while sitting in the car.

This is the ending, this is the ending between them. In fact, I have long understood that no matter what, we will never be together again in this life. Unfortunately, I still love you.

Unwilling, uneasy.

(End of this chapter)