Pride and Prejudice; Sense and Sensibility

Chapter 36 Darcy's Marriage Proposal Rejected

After the Collinses left, Elizabeth took out all the letters she had received from Jane since she arrived in Kent, and read them carefully one by one, as if deliberately trying to make enemies with Darcy to the end.There was no real complaint in the letter, neither reference to the past nor the present.She has a demure temperament and a generous heart, so her writing style never has some dark colors, and always brings joy and encouragement to the paper.But now, after reading all her letters, and even reading between the lines of each of her letters, I can't find that joyful tone.

Elizabeth only felt that every sentence in the letter revealed uneasiness, because she read it carefully and intensively this time, but she read it roughly last time, so she didn't notice this kind of place.Mr. Darcy's shameless boast that making people suffer was his specialty made her feel her sister's suffering all the more deeply.She could take comfort in the thought that Darcy was leaving Rosings the day after tomorrow.And the still greater consolation was that in less than a fortnight she was with Jane again, and could use all the force of affection to help her regain her spirits.

To think of Darcy's departure from Kent was to remind him that his cousin was going with him, but Fitzwilliam had made it clear that he had no intention of it.Therefore, although he was quite likable, she could not be unhappy because of him.She was thinking of this when she heard the doorbell ring, and her heart skipped a beat for she thought it was Fitzwilliam, for he had been late one night, and this time it was probably on purpose to see her.

She soon knew she had guessed wrong.It was Mr. Darcy who entered the room, to her surprise, and she felt another emotion.Immediately he hurriedly asked her if she was well, and said that he had come specially to hear the good news of her recovery.She parried him politely and perfunctorily.He sat for a few minutes, then got up and paced up and down the room.Elizabeth was very surprised, but said nothing.

After a few minutes' silence, he came up to her with an excited air and said: "I can't bear it any longer. I can't help my feelings. Allow me to tell you that I How much I admire you, how much I love you."

Elizabeth was indescribably amazed.She stared, blushed, suspicious, and silent.Looking at the situation, he thought she was urging him to continue talking, so he immediately confessed all the good feelings he had for her now and in the past.He spoke very eloquently, besides pouring out his love, he also expressed all kinds of other feelings.On the one hand, he kept expressing his deep affection, but on the other hand, he also said a lot of arrogant and rude words.He felt that she came from a humble background, that he was accommodating her, and that various obstacles in the family often made his opinions and wishes incompatible—he confided so enthusiastically, although it seemed that he acted very cautiously this time , but may not make his marriage proposal popular.

Although her dislike for him was deep-rooted, she could not remain indifferent to such a man's kindness.Although her will never faltered for a moment, at the beginning she also understood that he would suffer pain, so she was quite disturbed. However, his later words aroused her resentment, and her pity was overwhelmed. Completely turned into anger.However, she tried to calm herself down so that she could give him an answer patiently when he had finished speaking.At last he told her that his love for her was so strong that, in spite of all his efforts to restrain it, he could not; and he expressed to her his hope that she would accept his proposal.She saw at once that when he said these words, he obviously thought that she would give him a satisfactory answer without suspense.Although he said in his mouth that he was afraid and anxious, but on his expression he looked safe.This annoyed her even more.

After he finished speaking, she blushed and said: "When encountering this kind of thing, the usual way to deal with it is this: people have good intentions for you, even if you can't give the same return, you have to show Thank you. I have to thank you now. Unfortunately, I don't feel this way. I never value your flattery, and you flatter me very reluctantly. I never want to cause anyone pain, even if I provoke others The pain is also due to inadvertence, and I hope that times will change soon. You told me that you were concerned about various aspects before, so you were not able to show me that you liked me. Now, after my explanation, It must be easy for you to restrain this kind of affection."

Mr. Darcy, who was reclining on the mantelpiece, fixed his eyes on her, seemed mixed with anger and surprise at what she said.His face was livid with anger, and the troubles in his heart could be seen from every part of his facial features.He tried to look calm, and waited until he thought he was calm before speaking.This moment of silence pained Elizabeth very much.

Finally, Darcy managed to hold his breath and said, "I'm very honored to have such an answer from you! Maybe I can ask you why I was rejected so impolitely? But it doesn't matter."

"I can also ask," she replied, "Why do you want to offend me and insult me ​​so clearly, but why do you want to say something against your own will and against your own reason in order to like me?" , even against your own character? If I am really rude, is that not enough reason for my rudeness? But I have other annoyances. You know I have, even if I don't dislike you, Even if there is no quarrel between me and you, even if I have a crush on you, then please think about it, how can a person who ruins the happiness of my dearest sister, or even ruin her happiness forever, move me heart to love him?"

Mr. Darcy's countenance changed greatly upon hearing her words.However, this emotional agitation only passed for a while, and he listened to her continue without interrupting.

"I have every reason to feel bad for you. You have treated it with utter indifference, and no matter what your motives are, it is unforgivable. Speaking of the separation between the two of them, even if you did not cause it alone , It was also your instigation, you dare not deny it, and you cannot deny it. You let the man be accused by everyone of being chaotic, and the woman be ridiculed by everyone as extravagant and dreamy, and you made them both suffer a lot. "

When she said this, she saw that he didn't show any remorse at all, so she was not angry at all.He even smiled with feigned disbelief.

"Can you deny that you did this?" she asked again.

He pretended to be calm and replied: "I don't want to deny it. I did use all means to break up the marriage between my friend and your sister. I don't deny it either, I feel very proud of my achievements that time. Finally, I did more than I did for myself.”

Elizabeth listened to his elegant words, on the surface she didn't want people to pay attention, but of course she understood the meaning of his words, but she could no longer calm the anger in her heart.

"It's not just that one thing I hate you, though," she went on. "I hated you very early, and I was prejudiced against you. What Mr. Wickham said some months ago, I understand your character. What else can you say about this matter? Let's see how you defend yourself, and say this matter is also whimsical to protect your friends? How will you turn the truth upside down? , cheating the world?"

When Mr. Darcy heard this, his face became more ugly, and his voice was not as calm as before.He said, "You are indeed very interested in that gentleman's affairs."

"Anyone who knows his misfortune, who can not care about him?"

"His misfortune!" repeated Darcy, contemptuously. "Yes, he is indeed very unfortunate."

"It's all your fault," cried Elizabeth, "that you've made him so poor—not so poor, of course. You've refused to give him all the benefits you knew were assigned to him. He justly Young and strong, he should be independent, but you have deprived him of this right. You did all these things, but when people mention his misfortune, you still despise and laugh at him."

"That's what you think of me!" cried Darcy, walking across the room.

"That's what you think of me! Thank you for explaining it so well. I'm really guilty of that! But," he stopped, turning to her, "it's only my honesty. I honestly told the reasons why I made mistakes again and again and hesitated in the past, and hurt your self-esteem, otherwise you might not care about these things that I offended you. I hide my contradictions, blindly compliment you, and convince you that I have unconditional and pure love for you no matter in terms of reason, thought, or various aspects, then maybe you will not have these harsh scoldings. It is a pity that I hate any pretense. I am not ashamed of the scruples I have just expressed. They are natural and right. Do you expect me to rejoice over your humble relatives? Do you think that if I climbed up to these relatives whose social status is far inferior to mine, I would actually feel lucky?"

Elizabeth was getting more and more angry, but she managed to say the following as calmly as possible: "If you had been more polite, Mr. Darcy, I might feel sorry for rejecting you. Besides, if you think it's If you confess to me, it will have other effects on me, then you are wrong."

He was startled at this, but said nothing.

So, she went on to say: "You have tried everything you can, but you can't move my heart and let me accept your marriage proposal."

He looked surprised again, and he looked at her with pain and wonder.

She continued: "From the moment I first met you, it can be said that from the moment I met you, your words and deeds made me feel that you are arrogant, selfish, and look down on others. This is the reason for your dissatisfaction, and many things have happened since then, which made me hate you. I haven't known you for a month, and I feel that a person like you, even if all the men in the world are dead, I I don't want to marry you either!"

"Have you said enough, madam, I fully understand your feelings. Now I can only be ashamed of my own scruples. Forgive me for taking you so long, and allow me to wish you the most sincere wishes for your health and happiness."

After saying these few words, he hurried out of the room.After a while, Elizabeth heard him open the door and leave.She was so confused, she didn't know how to support herself, and she felt so weak that she sat there and cried for half an hour.She recalled the scene just now, and the more she thought about it, the more strange she felt.Mr. Darcy should propose to her, he should have been in love with her for months!to love her so much as to marry her, however many faults she had, and it was by these faults that his own sister was prevented from marrying his friend, which affected him at least as much. — This is really an incredible thing!It is enough masturbation that a person can win such passionate admiration from others without knowing it.But his arrogance, his abominable arrogance, his audacity to admit that he had spoiled Jane's good, and though he could not justify himself at the time, it was his self-righteousness, and his mention The indifference to Mr. Wickham, and his indifference to the cruelty of his treatment of Wickham... Thinking of these things, even for a moment she felt sympathetic to his love affair. The softness in my heart was touched, and even the slightest pity was completely offset at this time.

She was so thoughtful and thoughtful, until she heard the sound of Lady Catherine's carriage, that she realized that she could not see Charlotte in this way, and hurried back to her room.

(End of this chapter)