i like you for many years

Chapter 24 Disguising (6)
He finally accepted her.I said to myself in my heart, such an ending is very much in my mind, I should go forward to bless, but why can't I move forward?I pulled Zhong An's arm and said, let's pack it up and go home to eat.Zhong An said it was fine, and said that the basketball team had activities tonight, so they couldn't accompany me to the movies.I said yes, then took him to the bus with a snack, and I went to the cinema by myself.I haven't watched a movie for a long time, and I don't want to wrong myself because of Zhong An's absence.

But in fact, I fell asleep watching it boringly after eating snacks.Until the end of the movie, when I left the theater, I found that my phone had more than a dozen missed calls because it was turned off to mute.It's all from rabbits.My heart tightened, and I immediately called back, but the phone had already been shut down.

Zhong An's phone was also turned off.

I walked back alone for about half an hour, and the phone finally rang again.What was displayed was Gu Beizhi's number.I picked it up, but it was the voice of a rabbit.

Yi Yang, something happened to Gu Beizhi.He drank, got into a fight, and is in the hospital.You come and see him.

The rabbit said and reported the location of the ward.I immediately stopped a taxi next to me.

I don't think I ever thought that a boy like Gu Beizhi would fight with others and get drunk to the point of drunkenness.In my heart, he used to be synonymous with sunshine. He was gentle, considerate, and considerate. He almost possessed the good qualities that all boys must have, and even more so.But now he was lying there motionless, beside the crying rabbit.

The next second, she got up and walked towards me.It gave me a slap with a snap.

Yi Yang, how do you want to torture Gu Beizhi?You don't like him but you don't let him go. Obviously Zhong An was causing trouble, but in the end he was the one who was beaten. Zhong An ran away and disappeared.Why do you enjoy Gu Beizhi's kindness to you, why do you want him to take the blame for your boyfriend!
After the rabbit finished speaking, he slapped his backhand again.

You can go, I never want to see you again.Gu Beizhi doesn't need you either.she says.

I didn't have time to react, so I was driven out of the ward by her words.Before leaving, I couldn't help but glanced at Gu Beizhi again, he closed his eyes peacefully, like a wronged child, I seemed to hear him yelling in a low voice.

Yi Yang, foreign girl, come here quickly.

His eyes never opened.

I turned my back and walked away quickly, a tear fell, no one saw clearly.

That day was the last time I saw the clock dark.

I dialed his phone and waited for him downstairs in his dormitory.When he appeared, he pretended to come over and put his arm around my shoulder.I avoided him and whispered, I'm sorry, I never liked you from the beginning to the end.

In fact, my subtext is, have you never liked me from the beginning to the end?Zhong An, you have never treated me with heart.It's just that I don't want to question you, and I don't want to be obsessed with it anymore.

After I finished that sentence, I turned and ran out of his sight.I couldn't hear what he was whispering behind him, but I thought there was no point in saying an apology.

Since then, Zhong An never came to see me again.

We are also in this school, but we have rarely met since then.It even made me wonder if we ever actually dated.And after Gu Beizhi was discharged from the hospital, he returned to his previous hippie smile.It was as if nothing like confession or fights happened.It's just that the rabbit no longer sits with me and chats gossip, but runs into me like hiding from the plague.

No one knew that I broke up with Zhong An, and I couldn't muster up the courage to tell Gu Beizhi anymore, I belatedly didn't want to lose him again.

I often think, if he is willing to come to me now, I will tell him like a baby, if you leave me in the future, you will be a puppy.

But I was lying in the dormitory and flipping through magazines boredly, but I heard the bottle and the girls in the same bed gossip. They said that the rabbit seemed to be in love recently.Many times, I saw Gu Beizhi waiting for her downstairs, and even brought her a box of lunch, so considerate.

My tears are no longer obedient.

I stuffed myself into the quilt and cried for a long time until the bottle asked me, Yi Yang, are you sick?I hummed and said, I have a stomachache.

The bottle immediately said that you should rest first, and I will go downstairs to help you buy some medicine.

I didn't say much, I just remembered that tall and thin boy would finally no longer stand in the rain and ask me "Will you share the same umbrella with me", and I never had him again in rainy days.

It seems that there is a song sung like this, you can forgive me, my rainy day, so I would rather go back to your side, now the pace will be slower, so determined, but you are getting further and further away.

When I opened my eyes again, what I saw were two human heads side by side.

The rabbit asked me with a smile on his face, Yi Yang, are you feeling better?We are back from buying medicine for you.

When I heard this sentence, I understood that the head next to me was indeed Gu Beizhi.

He was holding a glass of boiled water in his hand, handed it to me, and said, take medicine quickly.

I shook my head and pushed the cup so hard that it almost fell on the bed.The water inside splashed out and splashed one of Gu Bei's cuffs.He smiled and said, you are just disobedient.

After finishing speaking, I put the medicine on my bedside, and said that if it hurts a lot later, I must take it.Now let's eat a bowl of noodles and pad my stomach.You must have missed your meal time again.

I obediently took the bowl of noodles, and then the rabbit pushed him and said, go back quickly and let Yi Yang rest early.

Gu Beizhi said that was fine, and left.

It almost made me think that time went back to the past, back to the time when the rabbit didn't blame me, and Gu Beizhi treated me very well.But at night I received a text message from him, foreign girl, are you feeling better?I'm going to Shanghai to continue my studies next month, so don't miss me too much.Call me if you have anything to do, and I will chat with you.

In the middle of the night, the screen of my mobile phone flickered, and I didn't know how to reply, so I had to pretend to be asleep.In fact, it was a sleepless night.

Later, the rabbit was still lukewarm to me, and Gu Beizhi was busy making contacts about going to Shanghai, so he rarely appeared in my sight.A week later, the rabbit happily ran in from the outside, holding the bottle and shouting loudly, I'm going to Shanghai! ! !

I finally see everything.

Gu Beizhi, he is finally willing to accept new happiness.

Half a month later, I went to see Gu Beizhi off.Asked why Rabbit wasn't with him, he said she would probably be there next week.I nodded, smiled and said, not bad.

Gu Beizhi pushed a pile of luggage into my arms, and said domineeringly, foreign girl, you must help me carry it to the train this time.

I reluctantly dragged my big and small bags and followed him. Several times, my tears almost fell.

I remembered that the rabbit blocked me in the back garden of the school early in the morning and told me not to provoke Gu Beizhi again.She said that a person should do things according to his conscience, if he brings harm to others from the beginning to the end, what right do you have to be with him.

I think she's right.

I think the reason why Gu Beizhi finally chose to leave is because he doesn't want to see me again.Leave me, go to a new city, with new people.This is the path he will choose after all.

What's wrong with me?

Even if no one will pay for my affairs from now on, even if his tenderness and consideration will belong to another girl from now on, even if we meet next time, we may have to pretend that we don't know each other.

But in order for him to continue his life happily in the future, for me not to hold him back, and for me to understand that not everything in this world has a chance to start again.

I will bless him.

Gu Beishang wanted to hug me for everything in front of the train, and the only thing left after he succeeded was a magazine that he kept flipping through in his hand.Said it was for me to relieve my boredom on the bus going back.I just stuffed it into my backpack.

I watched him enter the car, and watched him sit down on the seat, waving to me outside the window.I didn't even cry.But at the moment the train started, tears fell like rain.

It's a pity that Gu Beizhi couldn't see it.

If he sees it, he will definitely smile triumphantly and say, "Yang girl, you don't want me too", but I won't give him a chance to know.

Gu Beizhi, it's only until this moment that I clearly know that I love you.

I love you, but I am so cowardly that I don't understand and dare not fight for you.There are many ways to love, but for you, I think I chose the last one, which is to let go.Gu Beizhi, I can't give you anything, I know you will always get it from other girls.But I don't know why, when I think of this, I feel sore in my heart.

It is said that Tarot tests have always been known for their accuracy, but I still feel that I have never seen such a test that directly hits people's hearts.

The person who chooses 1 has missed the person who loves you the most. This card is the 4 of the Holy Grail, which means that the person who loves you is the one who is by your side but you don’t know it. It will take a long time for you to realize that he is The one who loves you with all their heart and is good to you too.But you were going to experience other people at the time, so you missed it.

I think of a sentence I read in a book before, there are two true loves in a person's life, and when you understand this truth, you have often missed one.

Thinking of Gu Beizhi, remembering that when he left, he said that this small town might not come back in the future.

He didn't forget to pat my face after he finished speaking, and added with a smile, foreign girl, from now on I won't be by your side, you have to remember to eat and sleep well, don't be unhappy.

But Gu Beizhi, even if I take good care of myself, will you come back to see me?You won't, and I know you never will.

So, no matter what I become, in fact, it has nothing to do with you.

Two years later, I finally had the opportunity to go to Shanghai, but it was just a detour, and it was called a trip.

Wandering around the bookstore at the airport, I saw a new album by Leung Ching Ru on the CD shelf, flipped through it, and bought it unconsciously.The boss asked me how long it would take to board the plane, and I said it would be a while, so she decided to play one of the songs for me.Do you like it? This is my favorite song in this album.The boss said with a smile.

She is alone / She has many dreams / She is obsessed with traveling / Covering the pain with the scenery... "I was surprised, and it hit my sore spot a little bit," wandering on the journey / Her hands are empty / But the mind is too heavy / The city At the beginning of the day when the lights are on, I can’t beat the darkness of the night/I drank all the wine in my glass/Her eyes were blurred with tears/But her mind is still clear/Looking up at the stars in the sky, I miss a certain rainbow/God knows I finally came to this city, but I’m gone long ago See Gu Bei's courage.After listening to this song, I stuffed the album into my backpack like a baby, like a sudden gift.

And Shanghai is so big, I still didn't have a coincidence enough to meet Gu Beizhi unexpectedly.

I no longer bothered to look through that magazine.So, as the first heroine, I will never read the story that Gu Beizhi wrote to me again.No one would know that the rabbit had never been with him from the beginning to the end. She followed him, but she didn't want to be separated from him.And Gu Beizhi's kindness to her was simply out of guilt.Even because, from the rabbit, I can occasionally get news of me.

The story says, if Yang Yang is willing to come to me, I will wait for her forever.

Yangyang is the pseudonym Gu Beizhi gave me.

In a person's life, there are always some unknowable regrets to be complete.

(End of this chapter)