i like you for many years

Chapter 34 "I Heard You Still Remember Me" Episode 3 ([-])
Shen Minglang would order Jay Chou's old songs every time, "Quiet", "Excuse", "Seven Lixiang", "The General" and "Stop the War". Except for the first song, the other songs were all from the midsummer of that year, which was released by Jay Chou. the same album.And when I bought the CD, Shen Minglang was still sitting at the next table just across the aisle from me. He kindly borrowed it from me to listen to it, and promised repeatedly that he would never lend it to others and would keep it safe.

Before that, I was never willing to lend my CD to others, but Shen Minglang happened to be that accident.

His eyes are always shining like stars.

Later, he learned every song on the CD, and when he returned it to me, he added, "Wen Lan, can you sing "Quiet"?"

I nodded, I'm a fan of Jay Chou, I don't know which one to sing.

Then you teach me.He has a hippie smile on his face, you must sing very well.

I don't know where Shen Minglang learned to be glib, but I will never forget that in the summer with the sound of cicadas, during lunch breaks for many consecutive days, I would lean on the desk, tilt my head, and whisper to The lyrics book taught him to sing the song "Quiet" sentence after sentence.

After so many years, he still remembered.

I was sitting in the corner of the KTV private room, holding a cup of iced coffee he ordered for me, taking a sip after a while, and suddenly cried out of nowhere.

That night we sang until exactly 12 o'clock in the evening. When the show was over, Shen Minglang sent me out. Hearing that his classmate lived very close to me and happened to be on the way, he sent us to a taxi with confidence.Before leaving, he shook his phone with me and said, contact me on WeChat!
I nodded, yes.

Then waved him goodbye.

At that time, I really thought that we would have a long time to come, and we would have many opportunities to see each other again.

If you ignore every step of life, no one can guarantee you.Nothing is certain and certain.Really, never.

The four words "To Japan is long" are simply deceiving.

Shen Minglang sent me a message on the way, asking where I was and if I got home safely.Ask me if there is any news from Gu Chaosheng, and if I can sleep.If he can't fall asleep, he will chat with me for a while.

I was like the child who could hold on without crying if no one helped him when he fell down. Because of his comfort, he cried endlessly along the way.Lying sideways on the bed, I can't remember how long I texted him, until before I knew it, I fell into a deep sleep.

When a new day came, I opened my eyes, stretched my waist, and saw the last message from Shen Minglang displayed on the screen of my phone.

As my classmate was leaving, he asked me a question.

I wake up and go back: what's the problem?you're awake?Thank you very much yesterday, it’s great to have a friend like you.

Shen Minglang's news popped up soon: My classmate said that you are the most temperamental of all my girl friends I brought him to meet.He asked me why I didn't chase you.

At the end of the story is a QQ emoticon covering his mouth and laughing.

Is this Shen Minglang's joke with me?

He said that every time he was serious before, others thought he was joking.I had heard his proposition a long time ago, but under the circumstances at that time, I didn't think of it at all.

I really took it as a joke he used to encourage me to "see you are still very attractive" and "you are not bad at all" in order to comfort me when I was in a bad mood.

What did I reply back then?

I can't remember.

I just remember that after that, I spent a long, long half a year living alone in my own country, licking my wounds silently.

During these hours, I didn't even look for Shen Minglang once.

He is also the same as before, and he will not take the initiative to find me or contact me.

Sometimes I can't help wondering, doesn't he never have troubles?Why every time, only when I was looking for him, he was always there, but he never took the initiative to talk to me?

But this is just thinking about it. After all, I, who desperately want to forget Gu Chaosheng, desperately want to forget that city, and desperately want to get rid of my own obsessions, have no time or strength to think about other things.

Shen Minglang just disappeared.

Half a year later, I found a job and wrote my first novel by using the time I spent in self-isolation.In the novel, I did not accidentally write about Gu Chaosheng, but to my own surprise, I unconsciously wrote about Shen Minglang.

The new book was tossed and turned, and it was about to be published. Late at night after being busy, I suddenly saw that familiar cartoon avatar in Moments, and suddenly remembered that I hadn’t greeted him for a long, long time.

I never really lost news of Gu Chaosheng, but Shen Minglang blocked me first.

Have you ever selectively forgotten some of the established facts when you were particularly lost?

It's as if those things never happened.

You have never loved, hated, hurt, or lost all over your body.

In this deep midnight, I opened the "Quiet" that Shen Minglang and I listened to most times that summer. Suddenly, I remembered those years, I taught him to sing this song over and over again in a low voice, and I wrote I showed him the story, and he repeatedly told me "you must be happy" in the classmate record he wrote for me; he also told me that he must stick to his dream and continue to write for the game major he chose in college; he said that his My dream is to be a game developer, and I once took me, an idiot with low game skills to a negative score, to play online games for a period of time. I know that he wanted to make me happy.

Later, he really went to work for a mobile game company, and I have finished my first book to this day.

I have heard a saying that if you are with someone, he will lead you to become better and better, if he encourages your dreams and makes you a better person, then he is the right person.

But when I heard these words, what appeared in my mind was the appearance of Shen Minglang.

How long have I known Shen Minglang?

Five years, six years, seven years or more?
With tears in my eyes, I couldn't figure out this proposition at all. I was just annoyed that I never thought that the connection between two people would be so fragile.

So fragile that one day I will face his voluntary abstention and walk away without saying a word.

I seem to have really forgotten.

I forgot a message sent by Shen Minglang in those days when I was immersed in writing and not on WeChat.

He said, Wen Lan, I'm in love.

Just six words, no more words, but many days have passed since I saw it.I didn't believe it at all, and I pressed Clear Chat History as soon as I could.For a long time, it seems that this sentence has never appeared before.

I completely forgot about it.

And then, not long ago, Shen Minglang's birthday.

When I woke up in the morning, I looked at the date displayed on my phone, and simply edited a message for him with the content "Happy Birthday! Am I so mean hahahaha" and sent it.

He didn't reply.

I guess, maybe there are too many people wishing him a happy birthday?A lazy person like him would definitely not reply one by one.

But why did I forget that in the past so many years, Shen Minglang and I never chatted offline suddenly.No matter how busy he is, even if he walks away halfway, he will politely tell me, I have something to do, I will talk about it later.

I even once praised him to my girlfriends, saying that he is a very gentlemanly person, which can be seen from these small details.

So isn't it weird that he didn't call me back?
My carelessness is really evident.

Shen Minglang, do you still remember that one Spring Festival, you called me out and said you would take me to set off fireworks?At that time, I thought it was very silly to set off fireworks together, but just because you called me, I followed you by a strange coincidence.

We bought a bunch of fireworks sticks, as well as colorful and extra large fireworks tubes.

When you lit them one by one in the open space, I looked at those bright flames, and your clear eyes not far away, I thought you were so gentle, I have never seen a boy as gentle as you.

Later, when you went to college, you saw a beautiful fireworks show at school. You took a video with your mobile phone and sent it to me on the Internet. I laughed secretly at you for being stupid.

But Shen Minglang, you know, you are the only one who ever lit up the night for me.

You have been with me for so long, and I naively believed that everyone in this world may abandon me, only you, definitely not.

Aren't we very, very good friends?
Why have I never tried to take your jokes seriously?

Life is long, how did you find the girl you want to protect for the rest of your life so quickly?
Will you take her to set off fireworks?Will you take her to play the mobile game you made?Will you play Three Kingdoms Kill with her?Will you take her to try that authentic dessert?Will you teach her to sing "Quiet"?

"You are far away and I will walk away slowly/
Why do I accommodate you even when we separate/
I really don't have the talent to be quiet and not so fast/
I will learn to let go of you because I love you too much/”

I looped this song over and over again, but I thought, maybe now, you already have a song you like more, right?

Shen Minglang, I'm sorry, I know, you are not wrong.

It's not that you left the scene too quickly, but me, I was too slow, you gave me five, six, seven years... and I was just pretending to be stupid until you finally escaped from my world.

The world is too big, you still rush to disappear.

(End of this chapter)