Human disqualification

Chapter 8 Waiting

He pretends to be very happy in front of outsiders, but in fact his heart is full of troubles and pains.

— Dante Alighieri

On late autumn nights, after the concert, crows of various shapes appeared in the Hibiya Public Hall, and these crows flapped their wings and flew back to their homes.

"Is this teacher Yamana?"

The talking crow was a young man with a hat on his head, and his hair was disheveled.He was wearing a baggy jacket and was tall and thin.

"It's me." The crow whose name was called out has a handsome figure and is a gentleman.He didn't stop, but went straight to Yurakucho and asked at the same time, "Who are you?"

The young man scratched his head and said with a smile, "Me? I'm just an ordinary person..."

"looking for me?"

"I especially like your music reviews, and I'm your admirer. It's just that I haven't seen your reviews recently, did you not write them?"

"I've been writing all the time."

The young man curled his lips, thinking: Oops!He studied at a university in Tokyo, but now he only wears a baggy jacket and a jacket-style suit, neither a student cap nor a school uniform.Parents don't seem to have given him much living expenses, so he needs to earn it himself.Sometimes he would shine shoes for others, sometimes he would sell lottery tickets, and recently he worked under the guise of assisting a publishing house editor.It is not false to say that he works for a certain publishing house, because he did secretly participate in planning some small conspiracies.That's why he doesn't look so shabby.

"When it comes to music, you have to mention Mozart."

The young man remembered that Mr. Yamana once wrote a small essay praising Mozart. In order to make up for the mistake just now, he quickly pretended to say this sentence to himself.

"Not necessarily..."

It seems that the other party's mood has eased a little, presumably the teacher's face under the collar of his coat has a smile on his face, so let's take a gamble.

"I think the source of modern music's degeneration should be Beethoven. Music and human life are intertwined. It can be said that music is the accompaniment of life, and only demons and heretics will let the two confront each other. I haven't heard Mozart for a long time , I didn’t expect to play his music tonight, which made me feel more deeply about music..."

"I'm getting in the car."

They have arrived at Yurakucho Station.

"Ah, that's all for today, I'll take my leave first. I'm really happy to have so much chat with the teacher tonight."

The young man put his hands in his pockets and saluted the teacher lightly, bid farewell to the teacher and went to Ginza.

Is Beethoven or Mozart any different?That teacher has a beard and can't figure out what the beard likes, or the bastard doesn't like it at all.That's right, people like critics can have any likes and dislikes. Of course, people who don't have likes and dislikes don't have any likes and dislikes.It's a little embarrassing that maybe I'm the same way.Growing a beard seems to make the teeth stronger, but it's also less likely to bite people.Also, the upper body of the royal family is wearing a suit, with clogs on their feet, and their beards look beautiful and dignified, but it is really pitiful when you think about it carefully.And trying to understand his psychology is also very painful.Perhaps it is the beard that brings the imminence of that person's confrontation with life closer.People with beards must look hideous when they fall asleep.If you try it yourself, maybe you will figure out a lot of things again.Max's beard looks like he's got a corn under his nose.What exactly is his beard made of?Descartes' beard reveals some suspicious thoughts, and looks like cow saliva.well?Who's that guy over there?It was Tanabe, yes, it was her.A woman over 40 is ... but she is short and looks young.She always has pocket money in hand, which is more reliable.

"Ms. Tanabe."

The young man stood behind her and patted her on the shoulder.The green beret really doesn't match at all, it's better not to wear it.Do all thinkers sternly reject liking?By the way, there is also age to consider.

"excuse me, you are?"

Nearsightedness can be very frustrating.

"I joined the crayon club..."

Did you have empyema?You don't want me to say my name, do you?

"I'm really sorry, is it Mr. Yanagawa?"

That's just a pseudonym, I won't tell you my real name.

"That's right, it's me. Thank you very much last time."

"It's okay, each other."

"Where are you going?"

"What about you?"

Sly enough.

"concert."

"is it?"

The other party seems relieved, it seems that it is very necessary to go to concerts frequently.

"I went to the newspaper office to do some errands, and now I have to take the subway back..."

lie!He must have met the man, and he used the newspaper as an excuse.The vanity of these socialist women is a real pain in the ass.

"Is it a speech?"

No face is red.

"No, it's the trade union..."

union?The old "Dictionary" says: This is a matter of running around in a hurry, crying, and shedding tears, which is similar to the meaning of busyness.

Once, I also cried a few times.

"Every day is very hard."

"Yeah, I'm tired every day."

To say otherwise would be an obvious lie.

"Now is a good time for a democratic revolution."

"Yes, it is indeed a good time."

"If you can't catch it, it will be forever..."

"No, we always have hope."

Flattering has patted the horse's hoof again, it seems that this is not for everyone.

"Sit down and have a cup of tea?"

Try it out first.

"Forget it tonight."

Didn't take the bait.It would be much easier for someone to marry such a wife.Not only does he retain the tenderness of his youth, but he also knows how to be careful when getting along with others.

When you see a 40-year-old woman, you become 40; when you see a 30-year-old woman, you become 30; when you see a [-]-[-] person, you become [-]-[-].But I can't see anyone anymore, Beethoven, Mozart, Yamana-sensei, Marx, Descartes, the royal family, and Ms. Tanabe are all gone.Only the wind blows through my body.

eat something.But the feeling in my stomach... I really shouldn't hold back my hiccups at a concert.

"Liu Chuan-kun!"

This name is really good, read "Chuanliu" upside down. "Yanagigawa pot" is a dish name in Japan.Hurry up and change your pseudonym tomorrow.Wait, who is this guy, why do I have no memory.But he is a real girl.Oh, I remembered.It turned out to be him, the literary youth who brought the manuscript to our agency.That guy is very boring. If you want to fool me if you drink too much, you have to stay away from him.

"Excuse me, who are you?"

Otherwise, they will be deceived by the other party.

"I brought the manuscript to the Crayon Club last time, but you said that I was imitating He Feng, and the imitation was very lame. In the end, I ran back in despair. You don't remember me?"

I shouldn't have said it was lame?follower?Or imitation?It must be a counterfeit.Anyway, I haven't read that manuscript, not a single page.What's the title? "Dancing Girl Story", just looking at the title is not enough.Even I feel embarrassed, fortunately there are such idiots in this world.

"Oh, I remember."

After all, the other party is an idiot, if he is beaten up, he will lose his face.This guy looks weak, but he can beat him.However, who knows what the outcome will be, it is better to be careful.

"I've changed the title."

It's scary.It doesn't look so stupid now, though.

"Really? It might be better to change it."

Not interested, not interested, still not interested.

"It has been changed to "Men and Women Mixed Battle"."

"Uh, mixed fight between men and women..."

Complete bastard, I really don't know what to say.It's like a louse, always have a bottom line when doing things.Don't come near me, I don't want to be embarrassed.That's why I don't like the company of literary youth.

"Already sold it."

"what?"

"I sold that manuscript."

It was so shocking, it was more of a miracle than a miracle.Is it a newcomer now?Even though he doesn't look very good, he might really be a genius.Who are you fooling?It is because of this that I dare not communicate with literary youths.No matter, let's say a few nice words first.

"The title is very novel."

"Indeed, it was specially modified to cater to contemporary readers."

You bastard, be careful I will kill you.Hurry up and stop, you will be struck by lightning.

"My manuscript fees are scary. I just went to taverns to drink one after another, and now I have more than half left."

And it's not because you drink too stingily, this guy is annoying.If you have two stinky money, you will start talking about it. In your pocket, there is only [-] yen in it.This guy is so sure that there are more than half left, did he sneak to the toilet and count?Well, definitely counted.If it's not a toilet, it's behind a utility pole in the street.The way he counts money with his drunken eyes open is pathetic.Don't worry, just look up at the birds flying by in the sky, moaning wearily, very pitiful.I have felt this way before.

"I'm going to spend all the rest of the money. You can go drinking with me. Is there a tavern you are familiar with nearby? If so, please show me the way."

As soon as this was said, it really made people look high.Is this guy really rich?In order to prevent the situation of paying the bill separately, it is better to ask clearly first.

"That tavern I know is expensive. If you go and blame me..."

"I still have 3000 yuan in my hand, shouldn't it be enough? I can give you the money for safekeeping. Anyway, I'm going to spend all the money tonight."

"That can't be done. If I take other people's money, I won't be able to enjoy myself."

Although this guy doesn't look very good, his words are quite pleasant.People who write novels are very bold in their bones.If you talk about Mozart, you become Mozart, and when you are with literary youth, you learn literary youth.It's natural when I do these things.really weird.

"Let's talk about literature tonight. I have always recognized your works, but the editor-in-chief is a relatively conservative person."

Then take him to Bamboo Field House.I still owe a bill of 1000 yuan there, and I asked him to pay it for me by the way.

"Is this what you said?"

"Yeah, it looks a little dirty, but I love coming here. How do you feel?"

"looks good."

"Haha, it seems that our tastes are similar. Let's have a good drink. Come on, cheers. Alas, hobbies are really complicated things. Hobbies can be born from a thousand kinds of dislikes, so there are no hobbies. There's nothing disgusting about it. Drink it all up and let's talk tonight. I didn't expect you to be a very reserved person. I can't stand silence. Silence is our natural enemy. The expression of 'supernatural self' is words Many, for everyone, this is almost the highest dedication. Besides, this kind of dedication is not asking for anything in return. But meeting such a lovely enemy can make me full of enthusiasm. I like the kind of kind that can make me full of enthusiasm Hurry up, drink it quickly, only fools firmly believe that nonsense is a lack of seriousness, and think that joking is not a serious answer, and even always ask others to be frank. But frankness is like not admitting that others are crazy, so I feel too much Strong people can't be frank with others. Frankness is a kind of violence. I don't like those older people, but they are really resourceful. (It is immoral for wolves to eat sheep, so sheep should Let me eat.) They are all superficially serious people who often talk nonsense. No matter how good the intuition lacks wisdom, it is just a coincidence. Have fun, silence is our enemy. If you talk too much, you will become more uneasy. It’s as if someone is pulling your sleeves from behind, making you unable to look back. I really don’t Good luck, the greatest people are those who trust their own judgment completely. Of course, the most stupid people are the same. It's better not to speak ill of people behind their backs. I didn't think I could do such an immoral thing. Fact In fact, speaking ill of people is also a kind of stinginess.

"Hurry up and drink. Let's talk about literature. Well, it doesn't matter whether you meet a newcomer or an old one. Anyway, the mood will change naturally. This is the most interesting part. By the way, a new writer How do you get 300 million readers to like you? It's not easy, but don't lose hope. It's easier than making a hundred specially selected readers unhappy. If a writer has millions of people, he Be happy with yourself too. Writers who are liked by only a few people are usually not very happy with themselves. It's a sad thing. If you're happy with yourself, you won't disappoint 300 million readers, so Man is poised to become a pandemic writer, so don't despair. Remember, you have this talent. Hurry up. Mr. Writer, do you want one person to read your work a thousand times? Or do you want 10 people to read you once works? For those who like words, the best answer in their minds should be that 10 people read your works a thousand times. You really have a bright future, so let it go and do it well. It doesn’t matter if you imitate Hefeng or not. Original literature is actually a stomach bag. While absorbing nutrients from others, one must also consider whether it can be completely digested and absorbed. It would be a big trouble to pull it out directly. So as long as it is digested properly, there is no big problem. After all, original literati have never It has never appeared since ancient times. Even if it did exist, I’m afraid there is no trace. So you don’t have to worry. Of course, there are always some literati who claim to be original in the world, but they are actually a group of incompetent people. There is nothing to be afraid of. You really The future is boundless. By the way, have you thought about the name of your next novel? Why don't you just call it "The Wide Door", how about it? The word door is somewhat archaic.

"I'm really sorry, I have to go out and throw up. Well, I'm fine. This wine doesn't seem to be very good. Well, it's much better to spit it out. I just wanted to throw up, and it's easy to get drunk while praising others Valéry once said, 'Your silence makes me crumble without a fight.' All I'm going to tell you tonight is Valéry's literature, nothing original at all. My stomach doesn't digest well, I finally spit it out as it is. If you want to listen, I can continue to tell you, and it’s okay to say a basket. But it’s better than giving you a book by Valery. I bought it at a second-hand bookstore I just read it on the tram, and I remember it very clearly because I just learned it. I guess I will sleep tonight and wake up tomorrow and forget it all. When I read Valery’s words, I become Valery; If you read Tian's words, you become Montaigne; if you read Pascal's words, you become Pascal. 'Only those who are completely immersed in happiness are qualified to commit suicide.' This is also Valery's words. How, right? We even have suicides. I have no qualifications. I will give you this book. Madam, pay the bill and buy everything. I have nothing to do. I will leave first. It is written in the book that it should be as light as a bird, not as light as a feather. Then What should I do?"

A thin young man with fluffy hair, a hat, and a jacket flew away like a waterfowl.

(End of this chapter)