Personal Charm Perfect Private Tutorial

Chapter 33 The Ultimate Application of Attraction (3)
1. There is a woman who is no longer young, can't even support herself, and hasn't saved a penny for her retirement.When she struggled to make ends meet, her only hope was to find a senior home for old women.She had met a man, but she did not love him, because she had no tender feelings, so that man did not accept her, marry her.

2. A man may not care much about the food and care he gets, but he takes comfort in the fact that his woman is a good cook or competent housekeeper.He provided her with a family name, a humble home, and entered into a permanent union with her.We have seen thousands of such examples.If a wife is asked if she married for love, she will usually say, "Gee! No, it was just a mutual aid alliance," or something similar.

3. A man of extraordinary skill is attracted to a widow of unrivaled beauty and an extraordinary figure.He was fascinated by her, and married her in a hurry before he could communicate the value of each other.Not long after the marriage, he found that she was idle and lazy, and all the housework had to be taken care of and looked after by a servant she had never met.It irritated him that her meals were always unpalatable.He began to wake up, and arguments ensued.The wife was even violent towards her husband, often throwing plates and other utensils on his head.They ended the feud in a divorce court.The husband was a warrior in court, boldly proving to the judge that she had nothing but beauty, played bridge at home, was idle, and savagely attacked him.She knew she would get a good amount of alimony to live out comfortably for the rest of her life and ask for nothing else.The judge said, "In my 30 years of judging cases, I have seen hundreds of such divorce cases. Those wives are blindly greedy for food and clothing, luxury and pleasure, but do not know the rewards. Once their tricks fail, When dealing with a life-long event like marriage, a man must spend a period of time with the person he likes first, so that both parties can fully understand each other's personality and related situations."

It can be seen that wrong induction will lead people to disaster.

Many a man is so captivated by the beauty of a girl or woman that he finds himself unable to leave her without her offering him her worth in return.Every such marriage ended in either divorce or separation.But whenever men hear advice before marriage and say, "Oh, we're just going to prove to the world that we're the exception to the rule of thumb." That's what they say.

There is no doubt that an unhappy married life is a kind of harm to the parties, and even destroys them.Everyone (whether married or not) should deeply understand this truth. Both husband and wife must communicate in terms of value, but if each other's value is based on instinct, then neither party is attractive at all.

4. A rich old widower, he has a mansion, a car, a yacht, and lives a luxurious life.Later, he married a woman, she had nothing to repay him, she just played with him blindly, displayed gorgeous clothes, accompanied him to various social activities, traveled around, and showed herself in various receptions, parties, etc. And the ability to attract the attention of the opposite sex at a dinner party.All this bored him, and she was dissatisfied and bored with life.The couple is bound by huge wealth, they can only enjoy the material life in front of them, and have no chance to touch other new things.Mere visits to slums and participation in illicit charities will not give them peace of mind or repentance of their past life of luxury.The couple did not escape the fate of divorce, which is how most marriages of this type end, because there was no valuable communication between the couple.

5. A rich woman marries a poet and later regrets it.Her previous thought was that she would be bathed in the halo of genius.Another rich woman married an army officer and later regretted it too.She was attracted by the officer's sharp uniform and firm demeanor and gait, but these gradually became monotonous.There was also a rich woman who married a driver because he was handsome and tall and had a lovely face and eyes and a soft voice.She soon found out that there was no exchange of value between them after marriage, so she divorced.Almost every such marriage, rich girl to poor boy or dude, ended in divorce after a few weeks, months, or years of ups and downs.

Someone once observed 15 such couples in the past 3000 years, and found that the final outcome of these 3000 couples was either divorced or separated. They were unhappy and miserable, and they all regretted their original decisions.The reason is that our instinctive consciousness cannot help us distinguish the facts, and we do not have the consciousness of attraction, so we dare not tell the truth, and cannot calmly face the inevitable outcome in the future.

As long as a marriage is not based on value exchange, it will eventually fail, and it will only make life full of storms in the future.It was like a small sailboat sailing freely in the summer breeze, suddenly being smashed to pieces in a strong storm.And the consciousness that creates attraction can lead any boat through any storm to any port.

In fact, most girls or women prefer to marry a handsome man rather than a poor man.However, if two people are poor and work together towards a life of abundance, their chances of having a happy and lasting marriage are greatly increased.Unbeknownst to prospective suitors, their finances have been investigated and the other party knows exactly how much money they have before they propose.In this way, if they feel that their conditions are acceptable, they will accept the marriage proposal; if they are not satisfied with their conditions, they will reject them outright.Therefore, we see that young people get married mostly out of instinctive value, and we don't expect any communication in this regard.Such marriages will eventually fail.

A young man works for his employer for a certain period of time according to the agreement, completes the corresponding work tasks, and gets paid for it.This exchange is derived from material value, and there is no attraction between faithful work on the one hand and compensation on the other.When the value of one party is asymmetric to the value of the other, dissatisfaction can arise.If the work is not satisfactory, or if the pay is too low, the whole system can collapse.There may be special rewards for years of devoted service, but these remain on a material level.Both and one of them have to pay average value or high value if they want to show attractiveness, as we will explain later.This kind of exchange between people is the lowest level of cooperation if one works only for a salary.

In commerce, the mutual exchange of goods or property of equal value in money or other value is only the most basic and primitive trade.If every one of your deals has an eye toward the future, the allure will be there.

The same principle applies to all kinds of affairs in life.

The monotonous exchange of one substance for another is just dry barter, whether it is an exchange of property, services, or money.If the husband and wife always stay together and live a boring life until they die, thinking about how to make a living and how to get rid of poverty every day, this kind of life can only be regarded as a simple material exchange, with no color at all.On the other hand, when they tried to get out of the boring life, they parted ways again.If we want to solve this problem, we must communicate the value of attraction.

Lesson 53

attractive value

From the moment humans start interacting, there has been an exchange of value, but those exchanges are likely to remain at the material level.There was a time when there was no currency in the world, and people used other items to pay in commercial transactions.The equivalents that people pay each other in the material world are sometimes totally unequal in terms of money or possessions.In charitable acts, a good kiss sometimes earns a great deal of money for a just cause, and such an act may be classed as a service or favor.The husband can choose to give up his freedom in exchange for the happiness of his wife; he can also choose to come back very late and, in the face of an unexplainable situation, buy some jewelry or a fur coat for his wife in order to calm things down.This is trading material things for a smile, a kiss, or a forgiveness.Some wives handle these situations skillfully, however, at this point the real value of the marriage is no longer there.And those rich fools always try to buy expensive gifts for young girls in exchange for marrying them.Instinctive desires overrule people's judgment, and their marriage cannot avoid dangerous fords without the guidance of attraction.

As we saw in the previous lesson, values ​​can be divided into three categories: material values, basic values, and noble values.The first value has already been mentioned earlier.The reason why it works is that the way of being a person determines everything.The husband provides his woman with a home and supports her in exchange for the services of a woman who is a good cook and housekeeper.All this is due to the law of humanness, which women also obey, which is an important form of exchange of value.We cannot deny the great fact that a fair deal always leads to a fruitful deal and to the satisfaction of both parties.If the transaction does not embody attractive reciprocal value, but is one-way, its durability will be threatened.

The values ​​that generate appeal are:

1. Basic value;
2. Noble value.

Such basic values ​​are not without value according to our method of division.On the contrary, they have extremely important value in their field.Let's look at a few examples:

1. A married man earns money to support his family in exchange for a woman he marries who does the cooking and housekeeping.From a human point of view, this is a very fair deal.Neither of them, however, showed attractive value.

In order to have these basic values, a man should:

Dress neatly, well, clean even during breaks, polite, considerate, generous, compassionate, helpful, good-natured, optimistic, good judgment about most if not all things , have a keen eye for behavior and etiquette that life requires.His language should be decent, and he should not have foul language when talking to others or giving advice to others. He should also maintain dignity when necessary, and respect other people's opinions and suggestions.His breath should be free from foulness, his teeth free from ulcers or rotting cavities, his nose and throat free from catarrh, and his tonsils free from discharge.He should also regularly cleanse his bowels lest it foul his breath or affect the smoothness of his skin.

These are valuable practical suggestions, and men who follow them are more likely to attract women's attention.

Elegant living knows no bounds.A man with good taste doesn't necessarily have to listen to classic music or read classic literature.On the contrary, those men who compose jazz, play jazz, dance to jazz, and listen to jazz from the bottom of their hearts are often so dull that they do not reflect the value of being attractive in any aspect of life. No matter where they are All aspects lack basic good qualities.You don't see a really respectable person dancing out there to this kind of half crazy twisted music.

2. A married woman should have the same value as a married man, that is, the basic values ​​we have just described.We call them basic values ​​because people can create and possess them in a short period of time or on special occasions.However, once people have such values, they will show a strong attraction in the process of winning.Of course, those values ​​that can last are noble, because they can go deep into a person's heart, and cannot be picked up and discarded at will, nor can they be changed at will like the way of being a human being.We'll explore this later.

It is said that marriage and employment are the two most influential things in the world.Because marriage is related to the continuation of the human race on the earth, it also involves family and family support, providing complete facilities for the family.It also contains all kinds of kinship, which are continuous connections.Employment involves employers and employees, but in the sense we use the term today, does not include the provision of professional service skills, so lawyers, doctors and dentists are not included, they are their own specialization.Commercial and industrial enterprises sometimes need to employ millions of people in one country and millions of people in another large country.

Hiring can be divided into several different levels: Hiring ordinary workers is the lowest level, hiring skilled craftsmen is one level higher, and hiring specialists is even higher.Employees in enterprises are usually some ordinary workers, clerks or salesmen.Then there are office workers, and workers in many other fields.Railway or industrial enterprises and other companies mostly employ male staff.

No matter what kind of occupation, practitioners may have a unique attraction that cannot be observed with the eyes, and only employees with this attraction can feel and recognize this force.This kind of power is at the top of the whole system, exerting a strong attraction to all the people in the system, and it constantly attracts them to get higher, higher, and higher.This power of attraction is of the highest value in human society.

An employee is said to be exchanging one material value for another if he merely sloppily performs the duties of his job, dawdles around from morning till night, and stops trying as long as he can keep his position. material value.But if he wants self-improvement, is genuinely true to his work, and takes a keen interest in it, then we say he is trading his hopes for self-improvement for basic value.But he can do more than that, there is a more powerful attraction ahead of him, but it doesn't work for him temporarily.

Today, there are too many employees who are half-documented, dilly-dally, and unwilling to put in the effort.Sometimes, they're a bunch of heavy smokers.Among people engaged in manual labor, the habit of smoking is common, they smoke 10 to 20 cigarettes an hour, this habit is gradually eroding their interest.A construction company that employed 1200 carpenters fired the smokers after discovering that they were less productive because of smoking.Later, when the business expanded and the company needed to hire more workers, they stopped hiring people who were addicted to the habit.

A construction company employs more than 1600 workers.The company observed that workers who had to light 12 or more cigarettes an hour spent nearly half of their time doing so over time.And at one point, the wages of workers were 300% higher than usual, and if they spent half their time smoking again, the already high wages would be doubled because of this situation.

Similar reports suggest that whenever a business or company shuts down, the first employees to lose their jobs are those who smoke.Now, those large employers are becoming more and more aware that when there are not enough jobs, it is the non-smoking employees who should be retained.

(End of this chapter)