Meet you in the most beautiful years

Chapter 23
He found Liu Haisu, stated the cause and effect, and analyzed the pros and cons.Because of being too emotional, his complexion was flushed and his veins were swollen.After hearing what he said, Liu Haisu pondered for a moment, silently picked up a pen soaked in thick ink, strode to the front of the list, and next to No.1, neatly wrote three words: Pan Yuliang.

This opportunity was won by Hong Ye for her, and it was also the tolerance and grace of the "art traitor" Liu Haisu.Years later, she became a well-known painter internationally, and she never forgot to help Hong Ye's family after his death. She also accepted Liu Haisu's invitation to return to China to teach at her alma mater, and became a teacher and friend with them.She has always remembered this teacher-student friendship in her heart.

Since then, she has become a female student of China's top art school at that time, and as a transfer student, she was enrolled in the No.11 regular class of Western painting.Although there is only a short period of less than two years, it cannot be denied that the Shanghai Academy of Fine Arts is the most important cornerstone for her to reach the peak of art.From a woman who loves painting to a professional painter and teacher in the field of fine arts, this cornerstone is an indispensable foundation. She has completed a gorgeous turn here.

However, her study and life in Shanghai Academy of Fine Arts did not go smoothly.

Her teachers are powerful painters Zhu Qizhan and Wang Jiyuan.She cherishes this hard-earned learning opportunity very much. Others spend three hours practicing painting, but she spends five or eight hours.Art makes her intoxicated, and the campus life full of artistic atmosphere makes her contented and happy.

The root of her happiness is because no one knows her past experience.But when she went out to sketch, at the invitation of her classmates, she casually sang a few famous lines from Peking opera.

Soon, she found a lot of questioning and disdainful looks, and there were always people pointing at her behind her back, and no one wanted to associate with her anymore.Although she devotes herself to studying and does not care about human affairs, she still cannot escape the shadow of her life experience.

There was even one time when she went out to sketch with Qiu Daiming, a boy in the class below her, and soon someone gave Zanhua a small report.Fortunately, Zanhua was very open-minded, and he only smiled slightly and said, "Nowadays men and women socialize openly, nothing surprising!" But since then, slanderous voices have been heard endlessly, and every sentence is like acupuncture, piercing people's hearts and lungs.

How sad it was in China at that time. A victimized woman had to be punished for the mistakes of others, and she would even bear the brand of social shame throughout her life. Because you were less fortunate than others, you had to accept slander and ridicule from others.

Later, some people went to the academic affairs office and the principal's office to make trouble, threatening to quit the school, claiming that they would "never go to school with prostitutes", and demanded that the school remove Pan Yuliang, otherwise, it would be a defilement of art and a blasphemy of innocent women like them.Fortunately, such incidents went on for a while, and with the mediation and efforts of the school, they finally subsided gradually.

The pain gnawed at her heart like a bug.No one will understand this kind of suffering except to tell Zanhua.Only Zanhua knows how innocent and wronged she is.Putting her face against his chest and listening to his steady and powerful heartbeat, she felt that the warmth of the world was still there, and her lover's embrace was still there, so she didn't need to be afraid.

Pan Zanhua gave her the most powerful support with his usual generosity and gentleness.He comforted her and said that in this world, as long as she has no conscience, does no harm to nature, is diligent in learning knowledge, and loves art, she is worthy of everyone's respect. Anyone's slander and misinterpretation are their own shallowness.Persevering in ideals and art is not a mistake, but a bright road that can lead to freedom and civilization.

Since then, she has become even more angry, and all gossip and gossip are just Konoha's self-shaking, and they can no longer disturb her heart.

No matter how far you go, I'm waiting for you

Since the introduction of the human body drawing class, although it has been criticized, under the insistence of the principal Liu Haisu, the class can still be continued.However, due to the negative impact caused by the female model incident, although the class did not stop, they did not dare to use nude models, and the teaching could only stay on a theoretical basis. As for the sketching training of human body sketching, it was almost blank.

When the teacher was in class, he stated the teaching trouble behind closed doors.Whether or not this link is broken through is crucial to the improvement of painting skills.The teacher is very sorry, saying that the current status quo can only be like this, this course can only be swallowed on the ground, and you have no choice but to swallow it.

She began to piece together the human body in her mind, drawing one after another based on her imagination.Although the lines can be called soft and the sense of movement is relaxed, but after careful study, none of them can satisfy her.Her lack of feeling comes from the sense of living body beauty.

She was troubled and confused by this.The more the teacher emphasized the difficulty of the course, the more determined she was to overcome it.She drew countless sheets of paper over and over again, but the more she drew, the more disappointed and irritable she became.Later, she was tired and exhausted, so she simply threw away the paintbrush, picked up her clothes and went to the bathroom.

Opening the curtain and walking in, her heart suddenly brightened.In the steaming mist, bodies of different shapes present different dynamics and rhythms, like a group of naked white elves, dancing on her drawing paper.

She was pleasantly surprised by this discovery.After being stunned for a moment, she turned around and ran back to the dormitory.She fetched a pen and paper, secretly hid it in her clothes and brought it into the bathroom, then found a hidden corner, and started sketching timidly.At this moment, all the problems seem to be solved easily under her pen, and all the muscles and lines are full of vitality.

She got carried away with the painting, and then, a naked woman blocked her in the corner of the bathroom.What followed was an expected uproar.Cursing, crying, insulting, even fighting.She endured it silently. She knew that she was wronged, but she never regretted it.

She couldn't go to the bathroom anymore, so she locked herself in the house after Pan Zanhua went out, took off her clothes, and drew herself naked in front of the mirror.She didn't know whether Pan Zanhua could understand this behavior that was regarded as outrageous by the world.She didn't dare to expect his support. After all, no man would want his woman to become the naked woman in the painting, being touched by countless ambiguous eyes.

As expected, the moment Pan Zanhua saw the "Nude", Pan Zanhua was so shocked that he couldn't speak.Obviously, such works are too visually impactful.Then, he discovered that the prototype of the nude woman in the painting was actually his own woman—he moved his eyes to her, and his eyes were full of puzzlement and reproach, which gradually turned into anger.He has always supported her in pursuing her artistic dreams, but he couldn't tolerate her challenging the world and face for art.

He turned and picked up a pair of scissors to destroy the work.Pan Yuliang rushed forward and covered herself with her body, crying and saying:
"I will never be able to repay the kindness you gave me. But if you want to destroy it, you might as well kill me first! It's not me, it's not shame, it's not pornography, it's art, it's art!"

He suddenly woke up. Based on his knowledge and experience of studying abroad, he naturally understood that this is art, or this should be a form of art.He just couldn't face the slander of the world and couldn't accept that she made a huge sacrifice for it.Watching her cry, thinking about her selflessness just now, as her man, even though he has thousands of reluctances, since she has no complaints or regrets, what else can he do?Only understanding her and supporting her is the respect she needs most.

Again he took it all in silence.Pan Yuliang deeply understood the helplessness and sadness in his heart, and she felt guilty for it.What a benefactor and a husband can give, he has given; but as his woman, the so-called husband and wife follow each other and teach their children, but she has never really fulfilled it.Meeting such a man is a blessing she has cultivated for thousands of lives. She has never reciprocated, but needs his support and responsibility again and again. How does this make her feel at ease?
She had unspeakable suffering. When she was sold into a brothel, she was given a bowl of medicine, ruining the possibility of having a baby.In this life, what else can she repay him?He couldn't bear children for him, and couldn't continue the incense for the Pan family, and the eldest wife Fang in his hometown only gave birth to a daughter for Zanhua.There are three types of unfilial piety, the greatest of which is having no descendants.At that time, if there were no offspring to inherit the incense, they would be the sinners of the family.In the most brilliant years of her life, does she want to let Zanhua accompany her to waste time and become an unworthy descendant of the Pan family?In the mighty years to come, when his temples are stained with frost, who will be the safest comfort under his knees?
She thought about it for a long time, and struggled in her heart for a long time, and then she began to impersonate her name and frequently wrote letters to the eldest lady Fang who was far away in her hometown.She didn't tell Zanhua, and in his tone, invited the eldest lady to come to Shanghai for a reunion.

The world of two people has since become the world of three people.Fang is a typical old-fashioned woman with small feet. She is tough and conservative, but also fights for every inch of land.She didn't know about Pan Yuliang's existence before, but now that she knew that her husband was willing to do so for this woman, it was inevitable that she was not jealous and made things difficult.

At that time, Pan Yuliang had mixed feelings in her heart. In order to love this man, she wanted to fulfill his physical relationship with another woman.There are not many women in the world who can have such morality and mind.Don't say no entanglement, don't say no pain, she just hides far away, tasting the sadness and sadness alone in the corner.

Decades later, Pan Zanhua was full of children and grandchildren. When he wrote to Pan Yuliang in France, he said:

Lao Fang is that you wrote a letter to teach her to come to Shanghai without my consent, do you remember?You went to live in the pavilion and forced me to live with her. I was determined not to, but I was moved by your sincerity and persuaded me again and again not to make me divorce because of you. Otherwise, if you don’t follow you, you won’t be able to live.

——(Pan Zanhua to Pan Yuliang on July 1956, 7)

It is conceivable that her persistence is a kind of aggrieved but wise sacrifice. All things in the world are merciful because of understanding.Although Pan Zanhua didn't agree at the beginning, isn't the old family happiness not happiness?Facts have proved that she has long had a thorough insight and compassion for life.

She moved to live in the pavilion and gave up the bedroom to Zanhua and Fang.All the time she was alone, she was relentless, venting on the drawing paper and canvas, so as to forget the pain in her heart.

In 1921, she amazed everyone's eyes at the student painting exhibition of the Shanghai Academy of Fine Arts.She unexpectedly exhibited many of the human body sketches that the teacher called difficult, and all of them were so perfect.

She was appreciated by the principal Liu Haisu and the teachers, but ironically, she also received abuse and ridicule from all sides.Once again, Liu Haisu was under pressure. He had to think of a way to get the best of both worlds, which could not only calm the turmoil in the school, but also not bury Pan Yuliang's talent.Although he saw that Pan Yuliang had an extremely rare artistic talent, the soil of China at that time would only kill such a genius.He suggested that Pan Yuliang drop out of school and study abroad in Europe, an art paradise.

Upon receiving this news, Pan Yuliang was mixed with joy and sorrow.Going to Europe for further studies was something she never even dared to think about, but it will soon become a reality; but after going there for several years, she is reluctant to part with Zan Hua for such a long time.

Zanhua is generous and gentle as usual.He fell in love with her at the beginning because of her different talents, but now that she has bloomed dazzlingly because of this, he is naturally happy and willing to support him unconditionally.

In order for her to go to Europe smoothly, he began to run around, using his old friends and confidantes, and finally won a place to study in France with a public subsidy.In fact, the so-called public subsidy is just a status that is better than nothing, and all expenses have to be borne by Pan Zanhua himself.

He silently took care of everything, and the rest was parting.

On August 8, Pan Yuliang, Su Xuelin, Qiu Daiming, Lin Baoquan and other students set off for Lyon on the French cruise ship Borders.

On the Huangpu River wharf, sailing away every day, farewell to people.The river water and the river wind flow slowly and blow slowly.They stood side by side by the river, looked at the river, at the cruise ship, and at each other, without much to say.After eight years of marriage, this is the first time they have separated.She tried her best to hold back her tears, and his eyes were also red.

After a long time, he took out a necklace from his pocket. The heart-shaped pendant was round and simple, exuding a faint golden luster.He peeled off the pendant, and it turned out that it was a small pendant box with two petals closed together.The peeled heart-shaped pendant spread out on the palm of his hand. At this time, two frames of black and white photos were inlaid in the grooves of the two petals: his peaceful smiling face, and her green and tender face.

She lowered her head and let him put the necklace on her neck.The moment he lowered his head, he whispered in her ear, "No matter how far you go, I will wait for you to come home!" She could no longer hold back tears, streaming down her cheeks.

This is a precious memorial, a key to memories.Knowing the king's heart is like the bright moon, and the king's heart treats each other like the bright moon.Over the years, all kinds of things, from her being reduced to prostitutes to a woman committed to a brothel, from her standing in front of him and singing the song "Bu Suanzi" sadly, until he redeemed her for her and married her as a concubine, and then asked the teacher to teach her literacy Painting, sending her to study abroad, all the past and emotions are concentrated in these two frames of photos, locked in the heart-shaped pendant, and turned into a wordless embrace.

The whistle whimpered, and the cruise ship started slowly.The wind in the river was getting stronger and stronger, and she stood by the railing for a long time, unwilling to move.The man in the top hat and black windbreaker on the pier became more and more blurred, but he stood stubbornly in the wind, refusing to leave.She greedily looked at the black figure, even if she looked at it for a second longer, until her eyes became sour, and her vision was flooded with tears.

She was facing the direction of the pier, thinking over and over again in her heart: Brother Zanhua, take care!
Dreams are the flowers of the other shore, and family affection is the root of this shore. No matter how long she leaves, she will just go and go back.

(End of this chapter)