Ji Liangchuan, I have loved you for so many years

Chapter 60
"Why? Liang Chuan asked me to accompany him to drink, does the ex-wife also take care of it?"

I was at a loss for words, my mind went blank, and I rushed in, no matter what reason made me forget my position and identity, I wanted to go in and see him, even though he no longer loves me , but I'm still so afraid to see him vulnerable.

Passing through the dark crowd, sure enough, I saw Ji Liangchuan lying on the bar counter drunk like mud.He was wearing a white shirt, his suit was casually thrown aside, his back heaved violently due to his heavy breathing.An unbearable sadness surged in my heart, I walked over to help him up, and whispered softly in his ear: "You are drunk, go home."

He didn't speak, his eyebrows were furrowed, and his eyes were closed heavily.I had no choice but to put his arm on my shoulders and help him out.When I turned around, I bumped into Du Xiaohang's red eyes, I don't know if it was anger or sadness.

"Shen Meng, can you sometimes consider my feelings? Don't do what you want so willfully, can you?"

"...Small belly, I just watched him get drunk..."

"Enough! I don't want to hear your explanation!" He turned and rushed through the dark crowd, disappearing under the brilliant lights in an instant.

I know that I have always been like this, hesitant and repeated, obviously I made up my mind at the beginning.How hard I endured this year, I struggled to restrain my desire to see him secretly, I struggled to restrain my desire to miss him crazily, finally, I suppressed it for a year, but every time I saw him , all principles and reason will collapse in an instant, and become the most insignificant in my world.Women are always emotional animals, impulsive.

I dragged his heavy body and walked out. As soon as I went out, I saw the contemptuous expression on the female staff member's face: "Ex-wife, don't you think you're taking too much control? What right do you have to control him?"

I smiled, looked at her even more contemptuously and said, "Ex-wife is not qualified, so ordinary employees have it?"

She was speechless for a moment and blushed.I didn't have time to pay attention to her, I found the car keys from Ji Liangchuan's pocket, and helped him into the car.

He was sleeping peacefully like a child next to me, surrounded by the distant sound of horns and the sound of cars' engines.At the red light, I just looked at him deeply like this, and smoothed his protruding eyebrows with my fingertips. He was so fragile and helpless like this.What a heroic man he was in his memories, he never faced everything tepidly, obviously he was still so calm a few days ago, but now he has become so depressed.

I sent him back to our original home, and took the door key out of his pocket.After I opened the door and walked in, I found that it was almost the same as when I left. I don’t know if he has never lived here during the year of separation, or he hasn’t changed anything. The appearance of the house is like nostalgia. With a beautiful once.I dragged his heavy body up to the bedroom on the second floor.

Putting him on the bed, the moonlight just hit his neck, making that piece of skin suddenly transparent.It was at this moment that I saw a red silk thread entangled there, and my heart sank suddenly.Unbuttoning the first button on his shirt turned out to be the peace amulet I gave him before, and he was still wearing it... Tears instantly filled his eyes... It turns out that we have never forgotten each other in the past year …Holding back the sudden pain, I gently untied it and kept it in my palm. It hurts me to see him like this, but I have no choice.And no matter why he agreed to marry Li Ziran, it was his choice.

When it comes to things in the world, sometimes emotions cannot overcome reason, because everyone has to live.

He went to the bathroom and took out a wet towel, and gently wiped his face.He suddenly frowned and opened his eyes. The moment he saw me, his eyes were full of confusion. Soon, he woke up and sat up straight in a daze.In the darkness, there was a piercing light in his eyes, and he pointed at me sharply: "What are you doing here?"

"I just passed Midnight Flower, and I saw you drank too much inside..."

"So you sent me back?" He stood up and walked towards me gradually, his tone stiff and cold.

"I'll go right away..." I picked up my handbag and walked out in a panic.

"Stop." He suddenly grabbed my wrist and slammed me against the wall next to me. The whole body was instantly filled with fiery temperature, which came from his burning aura.

"You..." In the huge shadow cast by him, my breathing suddenly became disordered.

"Did anyone tell you that drunk men can't approach casually?" He looked down at me, and his warm breath rushed towards me.

I could only be silent, looking down at the floor.

"You know, you must know, you came here on purpose, who made you this kind of woman. Do you remember how we met? Huh?"

I looked up at this strange man with wide eyes, and couldn't speak for a moment.

"You were drunk. I sent you to the hotel with good intentions. I didn't want to do anything to you. It's good that you are willing to give me your body. Did you plan to seduce me from the beginning, then marry me, and then help Your father's company made money, and kicked me out after getting the benefits?"

"Ji Liangchuan! I'm not that kind of woman!" I looked up at him furiously, yes, he was right to think so, that's what I told him when I left, but why, from his mouth Is the same words so hard for me to accept?
"Didn't you? Didn't you say you loved me and then kissed another man? Didn't you? You could ignore me for a year? If it wasn't for the meeting I arranged, if it wasn't for me finding various reasons every day Go to your company to see you, are you planning to avoid me forever?"

I was stunned, staring blankly at his resolute eyebrows, the bulging veins on his forehead, and those cold eyes like cold stars.For a moment, I wanted to throw myself into his arms and cry. It turns out that his love for me has never been less than a tiny bit.

I don't know if my heart is sore or in pain, but I just can't speak.

"Shen Meng, do you know that I am a very proud person. Except for Zhang Meiyi, women don't matter to me at all. I have never given anyone my sincerity. I know that they all approach me with a purpose. But, for you, I can completely forget about the woman I love the most, and live with you peacefully. All women say they love me, but I am willing to believe what you say, and believe that you are true Love me. For your sake, I desperately tried to keep you, and I desperately did things that even I thought were absurd. The result? What did I get in return? You kissed other men behind my back! Shen Meng! Tell me! What else do you want me to do to satisfy you?!"

It hurt so much, countless wounds were cut open by his words, and a bitter cold wind blew, and those wounds became meandering upwards, slowly leading to the depths of the heart.

I cried, tears uncontrollably vented in this quiet and noisy night.

"That's enough, I was the one who misjudged myself. You are a woman who is easygoing. Get out, and don't let me see you again. As long as I want, we can never see each other again." He let go of me, and again Sit back on the bed.

I froze in place, feeling like I was about to stop breathing.

"What? Do you still want to stay and let me comfort you for another night?" He raised his eyebrows and looked at me dismissively.

"If you love me, why did you marry another woman!" I suddenly shouted like crazy.

He was stunned, and then said mockingly: "Since loving someone is too tiring, I choose to be loved. A mercenary like you will never understand, because you have never truly loved someone."

"You!" It turned out to be more heartbreaking to hear him deny my feelings for him than any words.

He looked at me with a contemptuous smile.A tidal wave of embarrassment hit me in an instant. At this moment, I just wanted to leave. There were some things that I couldn't explain, and he didn't understand either. Most importantly, I hoped that he would never understand.

He left in a hurry, walked to the street, wiped away his tears, took a taxi and went back to Hongdou's house.

When I got home, Hongdou immediately greeted me when I saw the mottled tears: "Oh? What's the matter with you?"

I threw myself into Hongdou's arms, crying and shouting: "Hongdou, I really did something wrong, I regret it...I really regret it! I'm not brave at all! I'm still so selfish! I miss him so much , I can't let him go at all!"

"...you met again today?"

"I thought that one year was enough time for me to forget about him, but every time I see him, all the memories and feelings come flooding back...I really can't control myself..."

"Then what are you going to do? What about Du Xiaohang? Do you have the heart to hurt him again and again?" She looked at me seriously.

I froze my trembling body and thought of Du Xiaohang's painful eyes when he left.I frantically took out my mobile phone from my pocket and dialed his number. The ring rang for a long time, as if he was hesitating to make a choice. Finally, his weak voice came from the other end of the phone: "Hello."

"Small belly..."

"...Shen Meng, I really love you, don't leave me, okay?"

My body suddenly lost the strength to support me, and I collapsed on the floor of the living room, letting tears flow down my face: "Forgive me, please?"

"Okay, because it's you, so... I'm willing to forgive you again for whatever you do wrong, trust you."

The phone was hung up in an instant, I threw the phone aside, and sat on the cold floor with my arms around my knees.I don't know what I should do right, what I should do is the best, but I was so cautious, and in the end I chose the path that hurt both of us: "Hongdou, I really hate myself, obviously who It hurts everyone, no one wants to hurt, but I hurt everyone, I am really a selfish, willful, and vacillating woman, Hongdou...so painful..."

Hongdou came over, patted my shoulder lightly, and comforted me: "It's not your fault... You left Ji Liangchuan for his future, and you chose to be with Du Xiaohang just to give Du Xiaohang a chance... I understand it all , you are a good girl, you are kinder than anyone else."

"But...they are not happy..."

Hongdou stopped talking and took me into his arms.Before I knew it, I fell asleep in her warm arms. In the dream, they were all looking at me with hurt eyes.

I was still not in the mood to look for a job, so I embarked on a solo trip with simple luggage, and the location was City A.After saying goodbye to Hongdou in the morning and calling Du Xiaohang, I hurriedly left City T by subway.I need to calm down, I am afraid that if I meet Ji Liangchuan again, I will fall into the abyss of eternal doom and cannot extricate myself, I can no longer maintain my rationality.

During the day, I frantically shop and eat in City A, numb myself, and try to make myself feel better.However, as the days add up day by day, I feel more and more sad, because his wedding is just a few days away.

The day before Ji Liangchuan's wedding, I finally decided not to attend. I couldn't see him with other women, smiling sweetly, embracing each other happily, and listening to the pastor say those words to them: I voluntarily admit you as my wife (husband), and solemnly promise that in the future, no matter whether the environment is good or bad, rich or poor, sick or healthy, I will treat each other as an irreplaceable lifelong partner who will live together until death Unswerving.

That's what we used to say to each other, how can I hear such holy words used on him and other women.

(End of this chapter)