Just love female men: accidentally sinicized

Chapter 19 The bad days will continue (2)
For the rest of the summer vacation, I almost finished staying at home. During that time, I also felt muddled. I couldn’t get into movies or read books. My head seemed to be separated from myself. place.I isolated myself from the outside world, didn't answer the phone, didn't see people, and couldn't access the Internet. I tried to see if I could get rid of the shadow in my mind. After trying for a few days, I still had hallucinations.Whenever I want to drive him away and force myself not to think about him, he just appears, standing in a corner of the house with a mocking face, looking at me coldly, laughing at me.While eating, he suddenly appeared across from me and said, "Lin Qi, what kind of food do you have?" When taking a bath, he suddenly appeared by the bathtub, glanced at my chest with an evil smile on his face, and said, "It's just your body shape I don’t even deserve to be dumped in line.” I was so frightened that I screamed loudly in the bathroom.When I was sleeping, he came again, sleeping next to me with his head propped up in a statue-like ecstasy posture, staring at me and saying, "What? Do you want to sleep with me?"

I suspect I'm on the verge of insanity, and I'm thinking about calling Miley to get me a ride to a psychiatric hospital for electrotherapy or something.

Miley, who was new to the workplace, was like a fish in water in the old man's company. She didn't bother to care about me who was in a state of madness, except to call the aunt who cleaned and cooked at my house on time every day to ask if I had a good meal.Once I heard my aunt say to Miley in Mandarin with a Shanghai accent, "Miss Mai, let me tell you the truth, Miss Lin is very strange. The windows are all closed and I am not allowed to open them, even in broad daylight. The light, soaked in the bathroom for several hours and does not come out. She is out of her mind all day long, eats very little food, and yells. It scares me to death. She was not like this before, a very happy one Why did people become like this, you said whether I should call Deputy Director Lin and ask him to come back early, I am worried that something big will happen."

A few days later, Comrade Lin Zancheng came back from Japan and saw me, as if he had seen a ghost, and was terribly frightened by me.At that time, I was floating around the house in my pajamas like a ghost, my hair seemed to be blown apart by something, my eyes were demented, and I was several pounds thinner than the one he saw before he went to Japan.He called my mother, only to find out that I hadn't been to Los Angeles, and then called Zhong Siyu, but Zhong Siyu didn't tell him that I had been to Thailand.

Comrade Lin Zan agreed to raise me so big is not for nothing, he quietly observed for two days, decided to be a soul catcher, to catch all my three souls and seven souls back.First, he drove me to a forested scenic spot in the suburbs to breathe fresh air, and then took me to eat top-notch western food. Over the years, he was willing to spend money to go out to a high-end restaurant. This is the only time. Usually, if I want to bring him, he will say I can make it much better than western restaurants.An old man who has never learned Western food, bought a few Western food cookbooks, and fiddled in the kitchen wearing reading glasses. He really made the taste of a Michelin three-star restaurant.It's a pity that this time, as a daughter, I didn't appreciate face so much. I was wearing tattered jeans, a small vest with a face printed on it, and sitting with him in a high-end western restaurant with messy hair, listlessly, as if he was on the road. The little beggar picked up by the side.If the lobby manager didn't think my dad was his friend's friend, he would have kicked me out.

I drank the thousands of dollars of red wine that my dad asked the waiter to open, mechanically cut the steak, mechanically put the medium-rare beef into my mouth, and mechanically chewed it, the taste was like chewing wax.My dad said he was going to the bathroom, and I didn't respond. Whether he was present or not didn't matter to me. When he came back, I looked up and saw Zhong Siyu sitting opposite.

It's over, the public also had hallucinations in broad daylight, my father turned into Zhong Siyu, I stared at Zhong Siyu in a daze, until he called my name twice, I was sure that it was not a hallucination, it was really him sitting opposite me.

Well, I know what's going on, Comrade Lin Zan agreed to do something.

"Lin Qi, why has your phone been turned off recently? What's wrong with you?" Zhong Siyu said softly, looking at me worriedly.Yes, it is this kind of eyes, the eyes that any woman can fall into.

I shook my head, unable to say anything.

"If it's because of that painting, I can explain it," he said.

I continue to shake my head.

"Don't worry Uncle Lin, you can only solve it if you have something to say."

I still shook my head, grabbed the red wine bottle and poured a large glass of wine into the glass, holding the glass and drinking to the bottom.When pouring the second glass, Zhong Siyu grabbed my hand and stopped me from continuing to pour: "Lin Qi, what's wrong with you?"

I don't know if it's because I drank a lot of red wine, my stomach was full of words, I stared at Zhong Siyu's handsome and calm face, and asked him: "Do you love Yunzhu?"

"Some things are not as you imagined." He looked away for a few seconds, then returned to my face, without directly answering my question.

"How about that, you tell me, I just want to know one thing, do you love her or not?"

I saw that he became silent and lowered his eyelashes. My voice became louder: "Did you love her with [-]% sincerity?"

He raised his eyes to look at me, with sadness in his brows and eyes, not knowing how to answer me.That's enough, for me, he has given the answer.After returning from Thailand, I have always had an inexplicable anger in my heart, and I couldn’t find an outlet. Now that anger wanders into my heart, and it makes me very painful. It seems that I can’t find a law to prove it when I solve a math problem.I stood up from my seat, and my disappointment with Zhong Siyu was the same as my disappointment with myself. It was like digging a treasure with a map. Taste that mood.

I didn't know why I was so angry, but I couldn't help but started shouting at him with red eyes: "All of them told me that love is ever-changing. I don't believe it, I just want you to tell me, are you sincere about Yunzhu?" Yes, is it 100% true to her?"

The people around the restaurant looked back at me and listened quietly as if they were reacting to my words.Comrade Lin Zancheng ran out from some corner, pulled me and said, "Sister, sit down and talk carefully, talk carefully."

"Is this important to you?" Zhong Siyu asked me.He stood up, nodded slightly and apologized to my dad: "Uncle Lin, I'm sorry, I can't help Lin Qi, this is her own problem." He looked at me, as if he wanted to see me through, "The sincerity means nothing to you. What is it?"

I can't answer.He removed the chair and left.

"Don't blame Dad, Dad didn't know that Si Yu had a girlfriend, if he knew, he wouldn't ask him to come and see you..."

On the way home, my dad chattered all the way, and I was still in a stupid state sitting next to me.I know that one of my tendons has caused me to fall into some kind of vicious circle, unable to extricate myself, trapped in the maze and unable to find a way out.

The night is gorgeous, and there are small colored lights hanging on the trees on the side of the road, trying to turn into stars in the sky.

My dad drove the car very slowly, I rolled down the window and leaned against the window: "Dad, do you love my mom?"

"Of course, I love her." Comrade Lin Zancheng did not hesitate.

"What about now? Are you still in love now?"

"Silly boy, my love with your mother belongs to the past, we are friends now."

"Can't love last forever? Isn't this the original meaning of love?"

My dad thought about it, and he was thinking of how to make me understand in the simplest way: "Silly girl, so you are stuck here. Go, go somewhere with dad."

I don't know what kind of medicine Lin Zan agreed to sell in the gourd, and drove me to the bowling alley.When parking, he said: "Exercise can make you feel better. It's been a long time since I played bowling, right? The last time I played bowling was when you were in the freshman year of high school, right?"

Of course I remember that not long after Zhong Siyu went to the United States, my dad took me to the bowling alley almost every day. I knew that he had to use the bowling ball to talk to me again.What did he say then? "Oh, look at the most prominent bottle at the front, the ball always goes to it first, it doesn't mean that the other bottles don't matter, you are now like the bottle standing in the most inconspicuous corner, don't get knocked down, etc He knocked down nine of them, and you can't beat one of them, so he knows how important you are."

Thinking about it now, if Comrade Lin Zhansong didn't say that, maybe I would have given up on Zhong Siyu long ago, and I wouldn't have written him a letter every week, wouldn't have waited for him on the Internet every day, and tried my best to be a bowling ball that won't be knocked down...

"Dad, you won't say again, tell me to be a bottle that can't be knocked down, right? You've used this trick before, it's boring." I sat on the rest chair with my head downcast.At eight or nine o'clock in the evening, there are still many people in the bowling alley, probably because there are relatively few fitness places nearby, and air-conditioning is provided all day long. In summer, a few friends spend tens of dollars, and they need a few bottles of cold beer. It is a pleasant thing to chat and play in a group.

My dad took off his suit jacket and warmed up.I didn't realize until now that in order to take me to a western restaurant for dinner, he even put on a suit that he doesn't usually wear, but he is old, and every movement shows that he has lost the strong strength of a young man, shaking his hands and feet like The warm-up movements of old men doing Tai Chi in the park.He was really old and his belly held his shirt into a sad shape.It is really unfilial of me to worry about me at a very old age.

Comrade Lin Zanzheng was in good spirits. He put on a standard posture and threw five balls in a row. Then he pulled me up from the sofa and asked me to throw two balls for him to see.I lost two reluctantly, and I didn't care about my posture. I missed one bottle at a time, but only hit four bottles at a time. My mood affected my luck. Normally, I could knock down at least seven or eight bottles at a time.

My dad started his speech: "Look, I just hit five, you hit two, you look carefully, no one has the same result." He went to the sofa chair and sat down, took a sip of tea, He asked me to sit down, and he continued, "Do you know what Dad means? You value the result too much. What is the result? The result is not waiting for you in the future. There are too many variables in this world, every day, every moment. It seems Bowling, you don’t know how many downs you’re going to get until you throw the ball. You can have an expectation, ten downs, but you can’t force it, boy.”

I looked at my dad, and my eyes gradually became foggy.Maybe there will be no one else in this world like him, who tried his best to pull me out of the predicament. He is like Forrest Gump, who can always make things clear to me with simple metaphors.

At a glance, there are more than a dozen bowling alleys, but none of the balls have the same result. Even if there are, the direction of the bottle falling in all directions is different, just like there are no two identical leaves in the world.

The lights here are bright, the crowd is joyful and noisy, like a little heart full of vitality in the night, I can feel the energy brought to me by its beating scales.The light in my eyes returned to the past, and my soul returned to my body. I stretched out my hand to my philosopher father and said with a smile, "Let's go home."

The car drove to the door of our house. When I got out of the car, I mustered up the courage to say to my dad: "As you always said, there are too many variables in this world. I want to tell you my true feelings. I can tell you with certainty. It seems that I don't like Zhong Siyu that much anymore, I like someone else."

My dad's mouth was open, and he obviously didn't expect this part.

"What's going on here? Lin Qi? Are you kidding your dad?" He called me from behind, and I had already run into the house.

Washing my hair, washing my face, taking a bath, reading books, watching movies and playing games, I regained my former mental strength, and felt that stepping on the floor was no longer empty.When I went to sleep at night, the lights in the room were turned off, and only a faint light shone from the bay window onto the floor.I wasn't afraid at all, I closed my eyes and opened them again, Su Lie came.

Like last time, he was lying next to me, with his head propped up and the corners of his mouth perfectly raised, laughing at me.

I turned over to face him, and imitated his way to support my head, and said to him: "From now on, I will face up to my heart, I will not run away from it, I will not avoid it, I will not doubt it, I will not go to it." Negative, and be myself until I fully own my own happiness, I hope you are the same, good luck." I said and reached out to touch his brow, lightly, almost touching, he was like a The water vapor bubbles and disappears.

I know, he will never appear in this form again.

Miley was the first to send a congratulatory message, congratulating me on my return to this evil world.During that time, Miley had a lot of things to do. She had to go to work during the day, organize files when she returned to the apartment at night, and occasionally did laundry and cooking for the old man.The old man's company is a listed auction house. The head office is in Hong Kong, and Beijing is just a branch office. All employees have sharp eyes.After Miley went to work, she was taken to several auctions by the old man and met many capable people. She gradually realized how shallow what she learned in school.

After going to work, she often said: "007, this world is much deeper than we imagined, wake up early, and get rid of vulgarity earlier."

On weekends, she dragged me to Panjiayuan whenever she was free. Instead of shopping, she just found a place to stay and observe the people buying and selling, like two female perverts waiting for an opportunity to commit crimes.I think Miley has changed too. I can’t say what it is, but it has changed. It’s like raising a cat and getting fat. I can’t tell where it’s fat. I thought it was hairy.The only thing that remains unchanged is that she still wears all kinds of big flower skirts, walks through the streets ostentatiously, still collects wild history books everywhere, and doesn't even look at the men who whistle at her on the street.

We squatted in a corner of Panjiayuan, talking nonsense while watching all kinds of laymen being played around by the seller.There was a foreigner who bought an old copy of "Ci Hai" and spent 100 U.S. dollars and was still complacent. He probably thought it was a secret book from heaven. Miley and I laughed for a long time, and we knew it after a long time. arrive.We can only think from another perspective, if the foreigner can learn Chinese with a copy of "Ci Hai", it will be worth more than five thousand dollars, and he will earn more.

I asked Miley if she had contacted Xu Zheng during the summer.She nodded with empty eyes, saying that Xu Zheng called her every night and said some useless words, such as: "Did you eat on time?" "Did you sleep well?" "Pay attention to your body" "Good night and good dreams" and so on.When she mentioned Xu Zheng, there was an unnatural melancholy on her face.

"Let's be honest with Xu Zheng, it's not good for you if you procrastinate." I advised Miley.She replied "Yes", and said that she would ask Xu Zheng to clarify when she was in senior year.

(End of this chapter)