Psychological Suggestion: Awaken Your Best Self

Chapter 17: Living With Suggestions
Section [-] A Charming Eye
Leonardo da Vinci once said: "The eyes are the windows to the soul." A person may lie, but his or her eyes never lie.

No matter how amazing beauticians and makeup artists in the world are, it is impossible to cover up and modify the eyes even a little bit, because it represents the deepest emotion in the heart.If you are not sure whether a person's words are from the heart, then pay attention to his (her) eyes.If what he (she) said to you is not from the heart, no matter how eloquent he (she) is, there will still be a touch of hypocrisy, embarrassment and unnaturalness deep in his (her) eyes.

A friend once asked me such a question: Where is the most attractive part of a person?
I gave the answer without hesitation: eyes!eyes!
A charming look can make people see your confidence, firmness and calmness; a charming look can bring you a strong spiritual aura; similarly, a charming look can make you gain good interpersonal relationships , allowing you to do well in social situations.

In daily work and life, there are always some people who are very "magical": he (she) glanced at him, and all the people around him immediately silenced; But you can feel the deep love and warmth; he (she) sits there quietly, without exuding any strength, you look into his (her) eyes, but you always feel that there is a mountain pressing down on you...

There are actually many such examples, which is not surprising. You must know that eyes are the most powerful force to influence others.

Eye contact is like a dialogue between the soul, conveying not only information and opinions, but also the truest feelings deep in the heart.Sympathy, pity, trust, doubt, understanding, incomprehension, like, hate, love, hate, the eyes connect the heart, it will not lie.What kind of emotion is in your heart, it will reflect what kind of emotion, you can't fake it.Everyone knows this, so if you can show sincerity, friendliness and trust in your eyes, the person you are talking to will naturally give you his (her) sincerity, friendliness and trust.

The appeal of the eyes is infinite, powerful, and magical. If you make good use of its power, you will reap endless surprises.

Don't doubt, the eyes are a hint, the simplest and most direct hint from the heart, it is more powerful than any language!

Want him (her) to impress you?Simply, stare at him (her) for a long time, let him (her) see your confidence, but remember, the time should not be too long, otherwise, it may make people feel awkward and uncomfortable.

Do you want him or her to agree with you?Simple, look directly at him (her), don't flinch, let him (her) see your firmness, remember, don't look away, don't even have the slightest flicker, if you retreat, you can only let him (She) laughs at your timidity and lack of confidence.

Do you want him (her) to be a tacit partner?Simple, look at the triangular area between his (her) eyes and mouth, let him (her) feel your expectation and tacit understanding.

……

Many people understand the magical power implied by the eyes, but they only know it, but there are very few people who can really control this magic power.I dare not say that I am an authority, but I have a wealth of knowledge in suggestion psychology. Below, I will briefly introduce several practice methods recognized by spiritual masters:
Exercise one:

Draw a solid black circle the size of a coin in the center of a six-inch piece of white paper, then tape the paper to the wall.It doesn't have to be too high, just be at eye level when you're sitting.Then, move the chair to the center of the room, sit down, and stare at the black dots on the white paper.Remember, don't deviate from the line of sight, be steady, and it's best not to blink. Of course, if you can't help but blink, you should be forgiven.Stare for 60 seconds, stop, let your eyes rest, and then continue to stare for 60 seconds, repeat 5 times.

Next, move the white paper 3 feet to the right, yes, it is moving the white paper, not your chair, your body is still facing straight ahead, and your head does not deflect, then, stare at the black dot again for 60 seconds, repeat 5 times .

Finally, move the white paper again, first let it return to the center position, then move it 3 feet to the left, and then, without moving your body or head, stare at the black spot with your eyes, 60 seconds each time, Repeat 5 times.

After doing this, you have to practice for 3 days in a row and stop after 3 days?No, you can't stop, you have to continue to practice, but the difficulty of the practice should be increased. For example, the time of staring at the black spots is extended to 120 seconds each time. When you can stare at the black spots for 15 minutes, your eyes are already very clear. incredible.

Exercise two:
Reattach the white paper back to the center, at the same height as your line of sight when standing upright, then stand up, stare at the black dot, and then, turn your head to the left, but your line of sight cannot be deflected, of course, you can also turn to the Turning your head to the right has the same effect, and the muscles and nerves around your eyes will be exercised.

Exercise three:
You can practice in church, in an opera house, on a bus, in a train car, in a concert venue, as long as you are surrounded by people, especially diagonally across from you.Be careful not to look directly at the other person, keep your eyes fixed on the front, and then use the corner of your eye to look at the person diagonally opposite. look over at you.If you do it well enough, you will find that he or she really turns his head quickly and pretends to give you a casual glance.Yes, that's right, he (she) was influenced by the hints in your eyes.

In addition to the above three methods, there are many other practice methods, for example, ask your friend for help, let him (her) act as your black spot, and look at him (her); another example, sit on a park bench , sending "look over" eye hints to people passing by, etc., here, I won't go into details one by one.

All in all, the eyes are the windows to the soul, and a charming look can make you get twice the result with half the effort on the road to success. However, although the charm of the eyes is very strong, if it is too strong, it will be counterproductive.You can stare at others to express your sincerity, expectation, trust, confidence and firmness, but you must remember that your gaze should not be aggressive or disgusting.You know, staring at others unscrupulously is a very rude behavior.

Section [-] Persuasion is a technical task

Persuasion, literally speaking, is to convince the other party with well-reasoned words.

In other words, persuasion means getting others to accept and agree with your point of view, your logic, and your way of thinking.

Everyone is destined to be unique from the moment of birth. Since he or she is unique, his or her thoughts, values, and logical methods are also naturally unique.It is not an easy task to change this uniqueness and make him (her) agree with you.

For example, your friend thinks that "keeping a dog is a very troublesome and dirty thing", you don't agree with this, and you want to convince him (her) that he (she) regards keeping a dog as a A "fun and loving activity".So what do you do?Yes, the first step is to change his (her) logic, or in other words, let him (her) have doubts about his or her original thoughts, logic, and beliefs. Without doubts, there will be no change. This is the essence of suggestion. It is also the truth of many things.

For example, if you have always firmly believed that wildebeests are a kind of horse, then even if someone tells you that this perception is wrong, you will think that the other party is lying.However, when you have doubts in your heart about the statement that "greede is a kind of horse", even if there is only a trace of doubt, you will explore, think, and figure it out.If at this time, your friend tells you, "The wildebeest is actually a kind of antelope", then it is easy for you to accept this new point of view.That is, you are convinced.

That's how it is!Persuasion is a technical task, and doubt is the prerequisite for all persuasion!

How can you make people doubt your own beliefs, and how can you convince others?
There are many methods, but only one is the most effective, that is: ask repeatedly, especially rhetorical questions!

When Andi was very young, her father left her, and her mother held resentment in her heart and always told Andi: "No man in the world is a good thing." Andi didn't believe it.However, later Andi grew up, fell in love twice, but suffered two betrayals, the sad Andi remembered what his mother had said, and finally believed it.Because of this, she began to have a faint hostility towards all men, and subconsciously resisted and guarded. The originally kind and lively girl gradually became indifferent. The neighbor Mrs. Horn couldn't stand it anymore. She found Ann Dee, had a special conversation with her:

Mrs. Horn asked Anti: "Honey, you always think that men in the world don't have a good thing. What's the reason?"

Antie said: "My mother once warned me solemnly, and I also experienced it personally. Both of my boyfriends cheated on me."

Mrs. Horn asked again: "Then what kind of man do you think is a bad man?"

An Di shook his head, his eyes were a little blank: "I don't know either."

Mrs. Horn struck while the iron was hot: "Then do you think that what your mother said can't be wrong, it must be correct?"

Andi thought for a while, then shook her head again: "I don't think so. In fact, my mother often makes mistakes. For example, she firmly believes that all apples are sour."

Mrs. Horn smiled: "Please forgive me, I have to confirm again, you have been in two relationships so far, and have two boyfriends?"

Andy nodded: "Yes."

Mrs. Horn asked: "Just because these two boyfriends are not good, do you think that no man in the world is a good thing?"

An Di blushed, hesitated and did not speak.

Mrs. Horn continued to ask: "You are 24 years old. Although there are not many young boys of your age, there are at least 1. Do you agree with this?"

An Di said "hmm", and then said, "I agree."

Mrs. Horn asked with a smile: "So is it more than two, or more than 1?"

An Di replied, "Ten thousand, it's obvious."

Mrs. Horn asked: "Honey, have you ever thought about the possibility that the two you met were bad men, while the remaining 98 were good men."

Andy: "This..."

Mrs. Horn smiled: "Honey, I just ask you if there is such a possibility. I hope you can answer me honestly."

An Di nodded: "It's possible."

Mrs. Horn laughed more cheerfully, and she asked An Di: "Since you yourself admit that there is such a possibility, how can you say that men in the world don't have a good thing?"

Anti was speechless, and she was silent, not knowing how to refute, because she felt that what Mrs. Horn said was indeed reasonable.

Seeing this, Mrs. Horn hugged Antie gently, and then said: "Honey, there are good people in the world and there are bad people, and there are bad men and there are good men. So, there is no need for you to treat all men Full of vigilance, your misfortune is just because you have not met a good man. However, misfortune is always short-lived. Think carefully about what is the standard of a good man in your heart. Determine it, and then look for it seriously and persevere , you will always find your own happiness.”

Anti looked at Mrs. Horn gratefully, and nodded vigorously: "I understand, madam, thank you."

See, the matter is so simple. Under Mrs. Horn's constant questioning and counter-questioning, Andy's faith in her heart was shaken. Following her train of thought to think, in the end, she changed her mind.

Perhaps this example is somewhat inappropriate, but anyway, Mrs. Horn's method is worthy of recognition and reference, isn't it?
Persuasion is a technical task, and the power of suggestion also requires the cooperation of other methods, and constant questioning is undoubtedly a very good method.If you don't believe it or have doubts about it, you might as well try it and try to change the minds of your friends, relatives, and colleagues. However, you must pay attention to one thing, you can't be malicious, and you don't have to do it for the sake of experimentation. And pay the price of being hated.

Section [-]: Learning to be a hint master

According to the nature, hints are divided into two types, positive hints and negative hints; according to the source, hints are divided into others hints and self hints.In our daily work and life, we are often involuntarily influenced by cues from others, but at the same time, for others, our words, actions, thoughts, and emotions are actually a kind of cues from others.If we can make good use of these cues, it will be as easy for us to influence the actions and thoughts of others as it is for others to influence us.

Think about it, are there always some people around us who are particularly popular?Are there always some people who are comfortable in any situation?Are there always some people who are particularly popular?Are there always some people who can play well among all kinds of people with various identities and personalities?

Don't doubt, these people are masters of psychological suggestion!They have a magical ability, which is to lead you to think and act according to his requirements unconsciously, and make you think that you are voluntary. Think along this line of thought.

feel terrible?No!Don't get me wrong, they are not wizards, nor are they evil, and they have no intention of harming anyone, on the contrary, their presence is always welcome.The reason why they have such "magic" and "charm" is that they know better than other people the art of communication, the art of suggestion, the art of speaking, or the art of euphemism.

It may be a bit vague to say so, so let's give an example:
In a company's senior management meeting, the boss proposed that the young John be the manager of the planning department, but the two executive vice presidents disagreed.One of the vice presidents expressed his opinion bluntly: "Mr. President, John has just graduated from university and has been employed for less than a year. He has made little contribution to the company and knows nothing about the work of the planning department. I don't think I don’t agree that a guy engaged in civil engineering can be qualified for the position of manager of the planning department.” The other vice president was more tactful, saying: “Mr. President, John is a young man who just graduated from college. When you dare to dare to do it, you lock him in the planning department and let him sit in the office every day, I am afraid he will not be happy. Moreover, I heard that John is a talented student in the civil engineering department of New York University. I think the engineering department is more suitable for him , Of course, these are just some superficial opinions of mine, I hope you can adopt them."

It was the same refusal, and the same feeling that John was too young and inexperienced to take on the big responsibility, but the words from the two vice presidents turned into two flavors.Let me ask, if you were the president, which vice president would you agree with more?
If you think such an example is not convincing enough, then let's talk about another one:
Gretel is the director of the Interrogation Department of the French Police Department. He is kind and has a good research on the art of euphemism. He can use hints to control people's psychology unconsciously.In the police station, whether it is the director and other senior leaders or the most ordinary clerks, almost no one dislikes him, even the prisoners arrested and interrogated by him are grateful to him, and no one has ever resented him.Even if some people disagree with him sometimes, he can easily change the opponents' original intentions and become his staunch supporters.All of this seems to prove the same thing: if Gretel is not an evil wizard who can manipulate souls, he is a person with a very strong aura, a very charismatic personality, and a very strong affinity.

Well, there has never been a real wizard in this world, and Gretel certainly wasn't. He is so popular because he uses some means, to be precise, means of suggestion to influence other people's actions and thoughts.

The old section chief of the second interrogation department died of a sudden cerebral hemorrhage. The second section needed a new section chief. The chief of the department, Gretel, summoned all the police officers and asked them to discuss and elect a section chief.At the beginning, when everyone proposed that Neeson be the chief of the section, Gretel shook his head secretly. His favorite candidate was not Neeson, but Geraint, but he would not tell everyone that. He just said that Neeson had a problem with alcoholism. Mistakes are often made, and it is difficult to convince the public to appoint such a person as the section chief.Everyone felt that what Gretel said was very reasonable, and then proposed another candidate, Johnson.Gretel was dissatisfied, but he said that although Johnson is an old man in the police station with rich work experience, he is old and lacks motivation, and he is only waiting for a safe retirement. Let him be the section chief, I am afraid that he will live up to everyone's expectations.Then, Gretel changed the subject and asked everyone to think about it to see if they could find someone who was most suitable for the position of chief of the second department, so they proposed another candidate—Gelint.Gellint was Gretel's favorite candidate. This time, he did not object, but thanked everyone for their positive proposals, and said that he did so only in the hope of finding a new section chief who would satisfy everyone.

See how clever Gretel is, and how skilfully he uses suggestion!He originally had the power to directly appoint a chief of the second section, but he did not do so. He knew that mandatory orders would make people resentful and generate strong resistance, so he delegated the power to the lower levels.He asked everyone to elect the chief of the section together. The police officers felt the respect from their superiors. Could they not be grateful?The police officers thought they had gained the initiative and felt the "weight" of their words, but is this really the case?

No, the initiative has always been firmly in Gretel's own hands. If the candidates proposed by the police officers do not meet his wishes, he will refuse. Of course, the way he refuses is very tactful. People can't do it", not "I disagree", but "I think he will live up to everyone's expectations".It seemed that he was thinking of the police officers wholeheartedly. How could such a thoughtful, considerate and respectful leader be unpopular?
I still remember that once when I went to buy a car, I met a very interesting salesman. When he sold a car, he never took the initiative to recommend models to customers, and he never said things like "I think you should buy...".He will put his figure very low, like a primary school student, ask the customer to give him advice, so that the customer feels that he is in charge of everything, but the salesman said very little, and only asked for advice at critical times. Then one or two sentences, unknowingly, the customer bought the car according to the salesman's expectation, and the customer will be very satisfied, because he is not "led by the nose" by the salesman, everything is his own choice.But, actually?
A brilliant psychological suggestion expert will never let the hinted person feel that he has accepted the hint, but will make the hinted person feel that everything is up to him. Obviously, whether it is the euphemistic vice president or Gretel As well as salesmen, they are all such masters.

What?You ask me what are the characteristics of a "master"?
Obviously, the most popular person in your heart, the person you think attracts you the most, the person you think has a particularly strong personality, the person you think you are particularly willing to approach, the person you think is particularly like-minded, and the person you think you can work with Very comfortable, people who you think are very harmonious with him, these are "masters".

Of course, one point must be emphasized here, that is, the person in your mind must not only have such an image in your mind, but also have such an image in the minds of many people. Most people welcome him and like him. I am willing to work with him, feel his charisma, and be willing to get close to him.After all, one person's opinion will be biased, but the eyes of the masses are discerning.

etc?You said that you also want to become such a "master"?Well, it's not impossible, everyone has the potential to become a "master", and everyone can become a "master". This has been proven long ago, and I don't deny it.

However, to become a "master", you must first understand one thing: when people get along with each other, the first behavior is not attraction, but instinctive repulsion.Therefore, if you want to become a "master", you must first let others not reject you, and you must understand three special mentalities in interpersonal communication:
First, approach the mentality.

Whether people can maintain a good and harmonious relationship, it is very important to get close. If the connection is not close, then everything is out of the question.Of course, sometimes your approach will make the other person feel a little hostile, but believe me, such a situation rarely occurs, and most people are still willing to accept your approach and welcome it.

Second, similar mentality.

There is an old saying in Eastern China, which is called different ways and no mutual conspiracies. It says that it is difficult for people with different interests to come together, but it is easier for like-minded people to get close and establish a deep friendship.Think about it, you say you like Sherlock Holmes, another person says, I like Sherlock Holmes too, and then, you guys discuss the plots of Sherlock Holmes enthusiastically.On the contrary, if you say I like Sherlock Holmes, the other person is at a loss - what is Holmes?Shampoo brand.At this time, do you feel very boring?
Third, complementarity mentality.

We all know that magnets have a characteristic that like poles repel each other and opposite poles attract.The same is true for people. It is difficult for two people with extremely similar personalities, qualities, and specialties to achieve true harmony, but two people with very different personalities, backgrounds and situations can become friends.For example, quick-tempered people get along well with slow-tempered people, mild-mannered people get along well with cranky people, and cheerful people get along well with introverted people.This is actually the magic of complementarity.

All in all, you have to remember that you can not easily influence others if you want to influence them.There is a secret to using hints to "influence" others' thoughts and actions, and this secret is "tactfulness".

Don't be too direct, that won't do you any good.

Learn to be tactful, learn to master the above three mentalities, and learn to let others get close to you instead of resisting you. As long as you really master the essence of it, believe me, you will also become a person with a strong aura.

(End of this chapter)