Waiting for the eternity of the moment

Chapter 34 I Let You Go (1)
(1)

"I'm sorry... I couldn't control myself just now." Afterwards, he left her body, lay next to her, and said to her apologetically.

Ruolin didn't speak, didn't move, and there was no expression on her face.

"I've experienced the feeling of losing someone. I don't want to experience that heart-wrenching feeling again. That's why I'm so afraid of losing you." Han Haoxuan said while reaching out to hug Ruolin.

Ruo Lin brushed his hand away: "Don't make excuses for what you have done."

Then she got out of bed and walked to the bathroom naked just like that.

"Ruolin..." Han Haoxuan shouted behind her, but she didn't look back.

Ruolin closed the bathroom door and locked it.

Ruo Lin looked at herself in the mirror, there were dots of red marks all over her snow-white skin, which were left by Han Haoxuan just now.

She couldn't imagine that Han Haoxuan treated her like that just now, raging and grabbing her like a wild beast.

She doesn't care about the family gap between the two, nor is she afraid of his mother's coercion and temptation to her. Even when she saw the scene of him kissing his ex-girlfriend in KTV, she just tried to calmly listen to his explanation to her, but his explanation was so pale Powerless, and wanted to bite her back, saying that she had a bad relationship with Mu Jingyan.

She smiled wryly, then turned on the shower and started pouring water into the bathtub.

Ruolin wiped her body over and over again in the bathtub, as if she wanted to wash away certain traces, but also as if those traces could never be wiped off.

"Ruolin, are you okay? Why haven't you come out for so long?" It wasn't until Han Haoxuan shouted while knocking on the door that Ruolin realized that she had been inside for a long time, and the water in the bathtub had been changed several times , The skin is almost wrinkled.

"I can't die." Ruo Lin replied coldly.

"Can I... can I come in?" Han Haoxuan spoke to Ruo Lin in a probing tone for the first time outside the bathroom door.

"Do you have to play me to death?" The voice couldn't be colder.

"You misunderstood. I didn't mean that. I said it all. It was my fault just now. Didn't I already apologize to you?"

"If an apology is useful, why do you need the police?" Ruo Lin seldom watched idol dramas, but she had watched "Meteor Garden", which was once popular all over the country, and thought that this line of dialogue was the most classic.

"Then what do you want me to do?" Han Haoxuan asked in pain.

"Let's... break up." Ruo Lin didn't come up on a whim, this was the answer she came up with after thinking for a long time while taking a shower in the bathroom.

"..." Han Haoxuan was stunned for a moment, he was obviously not used to Ruolin's words.separate?Breaking up after only a few months together?Then their relationship is too weak, right?
"No, I said no!" When Han Haoxuan was angry, he would have the demeanor of a roaring leader in Qiong Yao drama.

Ruolin wrapped herself in a bathrobe, opened the door and walked out.

The heating in the bedroom was fully turned on, and the thick curtains were drawn tightly, as if it was night.

A warm yellow desk lamp was lit in the room.

Han Haoxuan was not wearing any clothes, and was sitting on the head of the bed, smoking silently, the lingering smoke rose from between his slender fingers.Normally, she would definitely help him put out the cigarette butts and tell him to cherish his body.However, at this moment, she didn't want to approach him.

She bypassed him and went straight to the closet to get her own clothes.

"Let's forget all the unhappiness, let's start again, start everything again." He had come behind her and embraced her from behind.

He hugged her tightly, not giving her a chance to move.

There was a faint smell of tobacco on his body. Although Ruolin didn't like him smoking, she didn't hate his smell, and was even a little fascinated.

"Let's break up, I'm tired." Ruolin insisted.

"Just because I violated you just now, you want to break up with me? We haven't been together once or twice, why this time..."

"It's different this time." Ruolin interrupted him, "This time it's different from before. Did you know what you were doing just now? Did you use me as a tool to vent your desire or a target for revenge?"

"Neither, I regard you as my woman."

"Stop doing this, don't keep labeling me as you. That will put me under even more pressure."

"Don't talk about unhappy things, okay? It's my fault today, I admit it." Han Haoxuan said almost humbly, "In the future, I promise I won't make you tired again, and I won't force you to do anything again. Everything is centered on you, if you say go left, I will never say go right. From now on, I will follow your orders, okay?"

"Not good. How dare I trouble you, Young Master Han?"

"Don't be angry. Let's get married. Let's get the marriage certificate tomorrow."

"I don't want to make a hasty decision on something as big as marriage..."

"Then you mean that you can consider marrying me in the future?" Han Haoxuan interrupted her on purpose, understanding her words one-sidedly.

"You can't help but understand it this way. I still suggest that we separate for a while. If we find that we are still attached to each other after we separate, it will not be too late to talk about marriage..."

"We can't separate!" Han Haoxuan interrupted her hastily, he didn't want to give Mu Jingyan any chance.

In the end, no one was able to convince anyone, so Han Haoxuan and Ruo Lin were in a state of cold war for several days.In fact, the so-called cold war is just a battle fought by Ruo Lin alone, because Han Haoxuan is not at all ready for war.

Ruolin originally wanted to pack her luggage and go back to the hut she rented, but Han Haoxuan took her seriously, sent her to work every morning, and parked the car near her workplace every afternoon before she got off work, not letting her There is an opportunity to "abscond".

However, after returning home, Ruolin was unwilling to say a word to Han Haoxuan, even though he tried to please her in every possible way, she ignored him.

At night, he sleeps in the master bedroom and she sleeps in the guest room.One night, Han Haoxuan tried to share the bed with Ruo Lin in the guest room, but she mercilessly refused and warned that if he broke into her room without her permission, the consequences would be disastrous.Han Haoxuan didn't force any more, so he had no choice but to go back to his room embarrassingly.

The guest room has become Ruo Lin's position, all she has to do is to guard the position strictly to prevent the enemy from invading.

However, this situation did not last long, not because the two reconciled, but because the Cold War escalated.

In the middle of every month, Ruolin would deposit next month's rent into Xinyu's card. Of course, the full amount was paid now, and she also paid off the part that Xinyu paid on her behalf in the past.

This time, while paying the rent, Ruolin paid some extra money to repay the money borrowed from Xinyu when her mother was sick.

As a result, Xin Yu received the money and called: "Ruo Lin, did you pay the rent for several months at once?"

"No, I just paid one month's rent, and the rest is your money."

"No, didn't you pay off the money you owed me?" Xin Yu said puzzledly, "Han Haoxuan already paid it back for you, and said it was your intention."

"Oh... that's right." Ruo Lin actually hated Han Haoxuan to death in her heart, why did she want to help her pay back the money on her own?Did he also ask Mu Jingyan to pay off the money she owed Mu Jingyan?
Self-righteous guy!Don't think that if you do this, I will forgive you for violating me!
Han Haoxuan didn't realize that the storm was coming, because all he could think about was how to make him and Ruolin reconcile as before.

He pretended to be a mysterious person and sent flowers to her office, but Ruolin told him, "Don't do such childish things as sending flowers again"; he forged a fake marriage certificate and secretly put it on the table in Ruolin's room , but Ruolin angrily said to him, "Do you think I'm a three-year-old child? You need two people to get a marriage certificate together"; , closed her room door and turned on the computer stereo loudly...

In short, no matter what he did, no matter how he tried to please her, she ignored him and turned to him with a cold face.

Although he kept her, although the two still lived in the same room, they were already strangers.

He knew that he had gone too far this time, but he had already apologized and tried to please her, but she was still indifferent.How could she forgive him?

"Let's talk." After the Cold War, this was the first time Ruo Lin took the initiative to talk to Han Haoxuan.

Although Ruolin's expression was quite serious when she spoke, Han Haoxuan felt that this was an opportunity to attack. After all, she gave him the opportunity to speak, and he was still complacent in his heart.

"You've paid off Xin Yu's money for me, right? Do you want me to say thank you?" Ruo Lin didn't beat around the bush, and said straight to the point.

Ruolin's words were beyond Han Haoxuan's expectation. He thought she was here to talk to him about his future relationship, but he didn't expect that the content of the conversation had nothing to do with it.

"Yes." Han Haoxuan didn't intend to deny it either.

"Then, have you paid off the money I owed Mu Jingyan?" Ruolin continued to ask.

"I wanted to pay it off, but he didn't give me a chance, and he rejected me directly, saying that it was between you and him, and told me not to intervene."

"You are so kind. I should thank you for thinking of me everywhere, right? Changing 'Fang Ling has an appointment' to 'Ruolin has an appointment' has something to do with you, right? Why don't you just explain everything you have done for me?" , I will also thank you." Ruolin said calmly.

"Why bother? I just hope you can relax a bit and don't feel too much pressure."

"My work is really related to you?" Ruo Lin suddenly raised her voice.

"So what? We are boyfriend and girlfriend, I should help you share some troubles, why are you so serious?" Han Haoxuan didn't intend to deny it.After all, paper can't contain fire, even if he doesn't explain now, Ruolin will know one day in the future.Instead of letting others tell her, he should tell it himself.He didn't intend to tell any lies to Ruolin.

"You should have consulted with me before doing these things, right? Do you know that what you do is no different from arranging my life? I don't need others to arrange my life! I thought I was working because I worked hard I just got it. I’m still thinking that my hard work has finally paid off. I don’t think there is another reason behind it. Do you know? What you do will only make me lose my head in front of other colleagues. They say that I I don’t care if I become a phoenix after catching a wealthy son-in-law, but I care if they say that I am secretly trying to get a job!”

"Don't be so excited, this matter is not that serious, at worst, change jobs." Han Haoxuan took Ruolin's hand, trying to calm down her emotions.

"What's the big deal? You always say it so lightly. Because you have a capable father who can't worry about food and clothing since childhood, right? But do you know how much I love my current job? This is my dream job as a writer. I thought I am advancing step by step, so the treatment in the unit is getting better and better. I never thought that my work is related to you, and I really never thought about it." Ruo Lin shook her head and said, feeling extremely disappointed in her heart, " Yes, it’s also my fault for being too stupid, there is never a pie in the sky, how could my salary increase so much, how could my position be promoted so fast? I am too confident in myself.”

"Your ability is worth so much salary, you are worth it!" Han Haoxuan said.

"Tell me, is there any part of my salary that you personally contribute?" Ruo Lin looked into his eyes.

"..." Han Haoxuan's expression was very painful. He didn't want to lie to her, but it was so difficult to tell the truth.

"Yes, right?" Ruolin stared at him.

Han Haoxuan sighed and nodded heavily.

Ruolin smiled wryly, and then said, "You are pitying me, you treat me like a beggar and give me alms, right?"

"It's not like that, I just don't want you to live so hard."

"But why didn't you ask me if I would like it before you did it?"

"I thought you wouldn't want to."

"Not necessarily. If you said you would lend me money and act sincerely enough, I might accept it. But if you 'help' me in this way now, not only will I not thank you, but I will hate you even more you!"

"I told you before that I wanted to help you pay back the money to Mu Jingyan, but you didn't agree, so I thought you wouldn't want me to lend you money..."

"I didn't agree, but didn't you still go to Mu Jingyan to pay back the money in spite of my obstruction? However, Mu Jingyan was right. The money I sent him was between me and him. Where is the turn?" How about you intervene?"

"It's not up to me to intervene in the matter between you and him? Hey, when you said this, your tone was almost exactly the same as his. What a tacit understanding!" Han Haoxuan sneered, he always felt that the relationship between Ruo Lin and Mu Jingyan was different generally.He wanted to help her pay back the money to Mu Jingyan, didn't he want Ruo Lin to have less contact with Mu Jingyan?
"I've known him for so many years, of course we have a tacit understanding!" Ruolin deliberately angered Han Haoxuan.Because she has already made up her mind, so she doesn't care about it when she speaks.

"Oh? Really? Is it more tacit understanding than being with me?" Han Haoxuan felt a tingling in his heart.

"Yes, I am much happier with him than with you. At least, he and I don't need to lie to each other." Ruo Lin said cruelly.

"Is being with him really happier than being with me?" Han Haoxuan's heart seemed to be stabbed hard, and the bloody pain hit instantly, "Is being with him happier than being with me?" ?”

"Yes." Ruolin said without hesitation, "I have no burden being with him. So I would rather borrow money from him than owe you money." If you want to leave, you have to speak harshly and decisively Bar?Although Ruolin's heart hurts when she said these words.But she knows the truth that long-term pain is worse than short-term pain.During the time with Han Haoxuan, there were sweetness, but more sadness. His mother put pressure on her, and she worked hard to get through it, but he kissed his ex-girlfriend and lied to her that he was with a client. He even made her As a tool to vent her desire, she violated her against her will!Not only that, but he also wanted to help her arrange her life. He quietly arranged her work and helped her pay back the money, and he didn't disclose anything before doing these things.If we continue to live like this, there will only be more and more conflicts and rifts between the two in the future, right?If the ending of the story is destined to be separated, why not withdraw early?

Han Haoxuan didn't speak any more, he lowered his head and leaned on the sofa dejectedly.

After a long time, as if he had made up his mind, he raised his head and said to Ruo Lin: "If you are sure that you will be happier with him, then I will let you go."

(2)

It was very late at night, and the office was suffocatingly quiet, except for a pale lamp hanging from the ceiling.

The ashtray on the desk was full of cigarette butts.

Han Haoxuan smoked one cigarette after another, and he didn't know how many cigarettes he had smoked. In the end, he choked so much that he coughed again and again, before he extinguished the cigarette in his hand.

He didn't leave work early today to pick her up at Ruo Lin's get off work as usual, but stayed alone in the office smoking a cigarette after the employees had left.

Sometimes, smoke is really a good thing, it can numb the nerves.

It's not that he didn't want to keep Ruolin, but he felt that he couldn't keep her, so he didn't dare to go home until now, he was afraid that Ruolin would have left after returning home.

He really couldn't face the empty house for a while.

Although, recently, he and Ruolin hardly talked when they stayed in the same room, but as long as she was in the room, he would feel at ease.

He couldn't imagine how he would live without Ruo Lin.

It was already two o'clock in the morning when he got home, Han Haoxuan took out the key and opened the door, when he opened the door he found his hands were trembling.

After turning on the light, he went straight to the guest room, and the door opened with a slight push. He had a bad feeling.

When the light in the guest room was turned on, Han Haoxuan didn't see Ruolin's figure, and most importantly, her luggage bag beside the bookcase was also gone!Moreover, the ring he gave Ruolin was lying quietly on the table at this moment, the little starlight usually looked brilliant when worn on Ruolin's finger, but now it hurt his eyes.

Next to the ring is the key to the house.It seems that she left resolutely this time, and she even returned the key to him.

He ran to the living room, looked at the refrigerator, looked at the dining table, looked at the coffee table, but did not find a small note.

Ruolin didn't leave a single word, just disappeared from his life!
Upon realizing this, Han Haoxuan fell powerlessly on the bed.

He didn't turn on the light in the bedroom, leaving himself in darkness.

He did say to let her go, but that was not his intention, Ruolin should know.

God knows how determined he was to say that.

Where is she now?She should be looking for Mu Jingyan, right?

Thinking of this, Han Haoxuan had a headache.Why does he treat her so well, but she still feels unhappy, unhappy?
Ruolin talked to the editor-in-chief once after she got to work. She planned to resign and leave, but the editor-in-chief persuaded her in every possible way, saying that she was good enough to take up the position of editor-in-chief. He also said that although Han Haoxuan told him to take care of her, But what he valued more was Ruolin's ability.

"Except for the bonus, Haoxuan paid a little out of his own pocket, and everything else was obtained by your own efforts, so don't be burdened. Although you broke up with Haoxuan, you are still my good employee. You should stay with me. Do a good job here, and it will definitely get better and better. If you leave, it will be a loss for the magazine." The editor-in-chief Fang Qiang said that, and Ruolin couldn't say anything else, otherwise she would appear too hypocritical.

After thanking the editor-in-chief, Ruolin decided to stay in the magazine and work harder.

After Mu Jingyan learned that Ruolin had broken up with Han Haoxuan, he was not happy, but felt a little guilty. He thought that Han Haoxuan had misunderstood him and Ruolin, and told Ruolin to explain to Han Haoxuan for her.

"No need. I broke up with him not because of you, but because of my disagreement with him." When Ruolin spoke, her tone was very calm, as if she didn't care about her relationship with Han Haoxuan.

"Oh." Mu Jingyan vaguely felt that the breakup between the two of them was not just a simple personality disagreement, but it was a matter between Ruo Lin and Han Haoxuan, and it was not convenient for him to ask about the specific details, nor did he want to.

"Going home during the Spring Festival?" Mu Jingyan saw that Ruolin's face was not looking well, so he started to change the subject.

"Of course I want to go home."

"Wang Mengmeng and Li Guangyuan are getting married. The wedding will be held on the sixth day of the first lunar month. Are you going to attend?"

(End of this chapter)