The FBI teaches you lie detection, people reading and intelligence skills

Chapter 15 Principles to be Followed in Polygraph Detection (3)
The price to pay for making mistakes is enormous.Before drawing conclusions about whether a person is lying, start by critically questioning what you have observed.If you still have doubts about the accuracy of the information you have obtained during the conversation, it is best not to rush to conclusions on the relevant issues. You should give yourself more time to think about this issue carefully, or take the relationship between you and the object of observation into consideration. Chat rescheduled for a later time.As soon as the conversation is over, sit down and record what was said and what you observed.

One, do we already know enough about what that person is normally like?Have you spent enough time in an environment without external pressure to carefully observe this person's behavior patterns and gain a deep understanding of his response patterns under normal and stress-free conditions?Is enough time spent on non-sensitive topics?These topics will not bring pressure to the observer, so there is no need for him to lie.

Second, can we pinpoint those combinations that occur in several ways?Is his behavior consistent?To accurately identify deceitful behavior, you should rely not on feeling, but on observation of specific behaviors.This specific behavior is caused by various forms of external stimuli, and every time these sensitive related events or related topics are mentioned, we should observe these forms of reactions in the observed object.These patterns of behavior occur in combinations as deviations from normal patterns of behavior.

If we can predict precisely when these symptoms will appear, observe these specific behaviors accurately, and confirm that the observed symptoms will appear in combination, then our analysis should have considerable accuracy.

Third, is there any behavior in us that "infects" the behavior of the other person?Will prejudice prevent me from making an impartial judgment?Don't forget that when we observe others, they are also observing us.Observing with bias can lead to fatal holes in our analysis.Nothing could be more devastating than a crisis of trust between two people when there is absolutely no reason to misunderstand.

Fourth, the other party may worry that we don't trust him.Are we suspicious of others for no reason?Is the matter at hand really so important that you are suspicious of the other party and damage the relationship between the two parties?Is there anyone else who can corroborate the information we got?Naturally, when we want to hire someone, we should look for the applicant's past qualifications; when we want to buy something from a salesman, you should communicate with other customers who have already purchased the product.

Fifth, is it possible that we are actually blinded by illusions and believe the lies of liars?As strange as it sounds, there are times when it is easier to accept a lie than to face the truth.Maybe we don't want to believe that the person is lying to us because the truth is disappointing or unacceptable.The real test is often not whether we can discover the truth, but whether we can accept the truth.Again, we must decide for ourselves how important the event at hand is.If you are not sure about this, and the situation is not so urgent, the advice is always: don't jump to conclusions.If you don't want to mess up the relationship, don't be careless, you must ensure that our starting point is fair.We have to review every step we have taken, beware of missing anything.If you inadvertently convey your suspicions to the other person, it can be difficult to retract the accusation without damaging your relationship.If we have to take risks, then our actions should try not to endanger Cheng's side.It should be prudent to take time to get to know each other better, which can reduce our risk of making wrong judgments.

§§§Section VII Principle [-]: Principle of Avoidance of Prejudice
You will get the most out of your abilities only by keeping your mind open as much as possible in conversation; basing your observations on preconceived biases and misunderstandings is unreliable.

We’ve been trying to make one point: People often have very little insight into whether they’ve fallen victim to, or are about to fall victim to, deceit.Part of the reason we're so ineffective at identifying deceit is that unreliable misleading behavior is taken as a symptom of reliable deceit.We know that it is dangerous to draw conclusions from isolated individual behaviors, because there really is no isolated and single body language signal that applies to everyone.In addition, personal bias or preconceptions can lead us into the wrong place.

The thoroughness with which preconceptions are discarded often affects the accuracy of the analysis.If from the outset we believe in our hearts that a person is a liar, we will only see in him those behavioral traits and symptoms that support our belief, whether or not the person is actually lying.Humans have a notoriously bad habit of jumping to conclusions and then looking for evidence, and if they can't find it, making it up out of thin air.

A certain professor has a preconceived impression of the residents of a certain state in the United States: they are the worst, most unscrupulous and most dangerous drivers in the United States!Every driver in this state sucks and I really can't bear to drive with them on the highway.First off, they're always speeding, they're crazy, and in the fast lane they'll fly past you.However, when I need to overtake and turn to the overtaking lane, they just slow down, block you in front of you so that you cannot overtake, and don't care about the long queue of cars behind you.These guys also like to stick to the ass of your car, switching the headlights on and off to make me get out of the way.Over time, whenever I see a lousy driver, I don't even need to look at the license plate to believe he must be from that state!

What was it that gave the professor such a bad impression of drivers in this state?This is an antecedent prejudice.It dominated the professor's powers of observation to a great extent, for he was always preoccupied with events that supported his own suspicions and expectations.However, what the professor observed was only one aspect of the real situation.Every driver in that state is so crazy?Of course it is impossible.But because he is blindfolded by prejudice and sees only what he wants to see, this impression arises.Prejudice weakened his powers of observation and led him to make wrong judgments.So, if we're trying to determine whether someone is lying to you, and don't want to be hasty in damaging the relationship, it's best to proceed with caution, discard preconceived notions, and be as objective as possible.Have we also experienced the pain of trying our best to express our love to others but not being believed by others?Do we feel the pain of our faithful spouse or an innocent teenager when the charge of cheating is imposed on them?Normal interpersonal relationships should be based on mutual respect and mutual trust, not based on groundless suspicion.If we hurt our loved ones or friends, it will leave a shadow in their hearts, thinking that they will have to continue to defend themselves when talking to us, and friends and relatives will not be as close to us as they used to be .They won't tell us their secrets; they won't share their hopes and dreams with us; they won't even ask us for advice or advice; they won't turn to us for help.What a sad thing this will be!

Conversely, preconceived biases can backfire, making us vulnerable to deception.If they really didn't want to believe that the handsome guy they met at the company picnic would lie to us, they'd be in a trap, because they'd never see a lie come to them again.Of course, that's not to say we should believe the rumors that are floating around.In fact, if we master the skills we've just learned to spot deceit, we're perfectly capable of seeing through someone when they're making up a story.But as much as we don't want to believe the rumors are true, we simply can't afford to ignore them.Don't go all the way, because everyone has reminded themselves that this guy is unreliable and opinionated, and would rather believe that everything he says is a lie.If you believe in your heart and soul that all the rumors are lies, you're convincing yourself that the handsome liar is honest.Of course, it’s not like we all have to become paranoid and believe everyone is lying.Just know that one shouldn't be so naive as to believe that everyone is telling the truth.Of course, through slow learning, the level of correctly identifying other people's communicative behavior will become higher and higher, and thus promote interpersonal communication.

So how can we avoid being influenced by bias?Quite simply, have we established in advance what is normal for this person before drawing conclusions about whether or not he is honest?Are the conclusions based on symptoms of deceitful behavior, or on a single isolated pattern of behavior?When discussing certain important topics with the other party, does he always show multiple signs of deception more consistently?
§§§ Section [-] Principle [-]: Synthesis Principle
Human communicative behavior is the result of the interaction of verbal and nonverbal communicative behavior, each of which is a response to internal or external stimuli.

If we could prove whether someone was lying or telling the truth by just one way of behaving, no one would try to lie at all, because he would be seen through.

Unfortunately, however, this is not the case.No matter how much we wish things were as easy as we imagined, we are always disappointed to find that the complexity of human communication behavior exceeds our expectations.When communicating with others, each of us has a set of behavior patterns exclusive to ourselves, which undoubtedly increases the complexity of interpersonal communication. At any moment, our emotional feelings may trigger specific behaviors. behavior pattern.The people we communicate with may be our close lovers, private partners, social friends, or public figures with whom we interact only in public.According to these different types of people, the type of sign language will often change accordingly.We also rely on gestures and cues when expressing a particular set of concepts, which actually form habitual patterns of response.However, if another person is in the same environment and on the same occasion, he may use a completely different set of communicative behavior patterns, his own unique way of expressing emotions and sign language.Therefore, we should not assume that there is a single sign language that works for everyone.

Paul sat at the gate of the airport gate and wept.What was the reason for Paul's weeping?It is possible that a relative of Paul has just died, and he is going to go to the funeral by motor, and he is grieving the loss of such a relative; Military mission, he is full of worries about the fate of his son... Which one is it?

Don't jump to conclusions, and realize that people can be sad for other reasons entirely.Maybe his daughter and son-in-law are about to return to their beautiful hometown after spending two years abroad, and he will see his granddaughter for the first time, so he shed tears of joy; or it may be his wife After a long treatment, he finally recovered and just returned from a distant hospital.Let's wait!We suddenly found new carpets in the departure hall of the airport, and the strong smell of carpet glue filled the hall. Could his tears be caused by his allergies to this smell?Or maybe he just had cataract surgery and couldn't get used to the bright light for a while?And all of this seems to explain why this man is sitting in the doorway of the departure hall crying.

From what has just been said, we will know how rash and arbitrary it is to judge whether a person is honest or not based on one clue alone.When we communicate with each other, we have our own unique sign language.Similarly, when we try to deceive others, we may display a series of characteristic signals.The deceitful symptoms we exhibit may never manifest themselves, or they may only appear occasionally.If you believe that a particular non-verbal behavior is a sign of deceit, and focus all your attention on it, hoping that the other person will display this symptom, you are likely to be disappointed because the symptom does not exist in the other party. body.By misfocusing our attention, we may even overlook other really important verbal and nonverbal signals that reveal the nature of deceit.Let's consider another situation: we target a behavioral trait and confidently conclude that deception exists.As we talked, we noticed that the other person was exhibiting this suspicious symptom.The question now is, was this an accident or a very important, substantive act?The fact that some actions do occur by chance, they occur randomly and do not imply any deceptive attempt.

If one standard is adhered to, there is no doubt that innocent subjects of observation will be mistakenly believed to be committing fraud.This will greatly reduce the credibility of identifying deceitful behavior, seriously jeopardize our relationship with others, greatly weaken our confidence and leave a shadow in our hearts, and make it impossible for us to make accurate judgments on other people's deceitful behavior at critical moments in the future. identification.Remember, never base judgments on the honesty of an observed person on the basis of isolated individual behaviors, because no single verbal or nonverbal behavior can prove whether a person is lying or telling the truth.

Let's reconsider this overarching guideline in more practical terms: A traffic policeman pulls over a driver suspected of DUI on the highway.The policeman cannot conclude that the driver is intoxicated before performing tests such as touching his nose, counting backwards, reciting the English alphabet, and walking in a straight line to determine whether he is sober.Only after the driver has completed all the tests can the police be able to make a judgment about the level of sobriety of the driver and the extent to which alcohol has impaired his driving behavior.If the police officer concludes that the driver is driving under the influence of alcohol based on the fact that the driver is driving very slowly or has made a sharp turn on the road, then the police officer is likely to be wrong in his judgment.When observing verbal and nonverbal communicative behavior, we should not rely solely on individual behaviors to determine the truthfulness of the observed statement.Human communication behavior is extremely complex, and human communication behavior often has extremely individual characteristics.The fact that certain behavioral characteristics are common to different people by no means means that the behavioral characteristics of one person will necessarily appear in others.We should not simplify and absolutize human behavior.

It should be noted that none of these behavioral characteristics can be regarded as a foolproof golden rule; it is even more important to note that the absence of the above behavioral characteristics in a person does not necessarily mean that he is not lying.Indeed, there are times when an honest person may randomly produce outward traits that seem to suggest that he is deceitful.But in fact this is just an accident or a wrong interpretation of the observer.We do not deny the possibility of two, three or even more behavioral characteristics appearing at the same time as accidental phenomena, although the probability is very small.It is not enough to conclude that a person is cheating on the basis of individual behavioral characteristics. Only the simultaneous appearance of multiple behavioral characteristics can help us determine the existence of deceptive behavior.

(End of this chapter)