The FBI teaches you lie detection, people reading and intelligence skills

Chapter 50 Behavior: Deciphering the Golden Code of the Soul

Chapter 50 Behavior: Deciphering the Golden Code of the Soul (3)
Yang Xiong's "Fayan·Qingshen" in the Western Han Dynasty said: "Old words are the voice of the heart." Gong Zizhen of the Qing Dynasty's "Bie Xinzhang Humanities" said: "I think about boredom, and words are the voice of the heart." "Words are the voice of the heart" has become a common practice idiom.In fact, in many occasions of verbal communication, "words" alone are often unable to hear the speaker's "sincerity", and must be combined with gestures, body posture, facial expressions and other body language that accompany the language (and sometimes intonation, tone, etc.). Accompanying speech means such as speed, pitch, and subtle differences in the pronunciation of each vocal organ), in order to guess the speaker's psychology.For example, No. 40 in Cao Xueqin's "Dream of Red Mansions" wrote: As I was talking, I saw a daughter-in-law replying: "The second daughter-in-law Bao has hanged herself." Sister Jia Lianfeng was shocked.Sister Feng hurriedly put away her timid look, and shouted instead: "It's all dead! What's the fuss about!"

On the surface, Sister Feng's words are sharp and powerful, but her actual demeanor is "surprised" and "quietly put away her timidity". These body language truly exposed Wang Xifeng's ruthless psychology.

Speaking and knowing people, you can refer to the following aspects to help:
(1) Look at the demeanor.Frustrated, tired, and lack of energy when talking, you can tell that your face is not good, and you sigh when you speak, as if facing the end of the world, and all hope is gone.The appearance of this kind of person is characterized by depression, fatigue, and lack of energy.People with this phenomenon can be judged to have lost confidence in themselves long ago.

Further analysis, he has the following personality:

Ask for trouble.Often worry about unnecessary things all day long.

Because of the loss of confidence in myself, I have no motivation to work, and I have no rational judgment.

It is easy to trust the words of the horoscope.

The matters assigned by the boss are always unable to be completed on schedule. Even if it is completed on schedule, there are many defects and extensive revisions are required.

(2) Look at the eyes.People who don't look directly at each other when talking, always listen with their heads down, occasionally raise their eyes to look at each other, but soon hang their heads down again.People with this phenomenon are mostly female employees.

Generally speaking, when women sit with men, they will show a shy and demure attitude, which is a unique habit of women.

In the art of knowing people, no matter whether the target is a man or a woman, as long as there is such a phenomenon, we can judge the mentality of the other party based on it.

Listening intently without raising your eyes, expressing your wholehearted trust in the person who is speaking to him or her.

If the two parties are a young couple, it means that she (he) has love (even deeply) for him (her).

All I know is to bow my head and listen, which means that I have no wariness against the other party, and have a "sense of security".

What I said above is for "a certain person" to have this phenomenon. If it is true for anyone, it is another matter. We should judge the personality of the other party based on this:
Timid personality.If you lack courage, you must have no staying power in doing things.Usually, it seems lifeless and lifeless.Weak will, easy to drift with the flow.

Keep looking away when talking, and when talking with others, show an attitude of not paying much attention to the other party, which means: observe the other party secretly and plan how to fight back; if you are not a square person, you must take precautions.

Assuming that this movement of looking away occurs during a conversation, it means that he is tired and has no intention of listening, and all he thinks in his heart is "it would be nice to end it soon".

When you encounter this situation, you should end the conversation as soon as possible, set a time, and talk about it next time.

When the two parties are talking, their eyes will inevitably meet. If the other party quickly looks away at this time, the following judgment should be made:

He has some difficulties in his heart, or deliberately conceals something.

Hastily averted his eyes, expressing that he was worried that you would find out what was on his mind.

Or it's a cowardly character, not daring to look directly at each other.

When the eyes meet, look directly at each other and never avoid it. This kind of person's character is usually a upright person, treats people with sincerity, and never plays any tricks. It is a manifestation of strong will and strong self-esteem.

A person who blinks constantly during a conversation, who blinks constantly during a conversation, is empathetic.Can listen carefully to what you have to say, and intends to help you as much as you can.

If during a conversation, the eyeballs are constantly turning and it becomes a habit, this kind of person cannot concentrate on listening to others, and is in an unstable mood, unable to understand the meaning of the other person's words, and tends to give up halfway in doing things.

When talking, staring at the other party intently, this kind of person is eager to get the other party to agree with his ideas and opinions.He has full confidence in himself and a great willingness to talk about things.

(3) Look at the chin.Many people don't pay much attention to the performance of the other person's chin when they are talking, but the actual situation is that the chin is also speaking "words".

Chin up, most people seldom "chin up" when talking, because this action has the meaning of insulting and belittling others.

The jaw is tightened, giving the impression of being resolute and unyielding.If the jaw is often pointed upwards (not tucked in) during conversation, there are two possibilities:

One is to show that the mood is restless and lacks concentration.Intentionally express that you are on equal footing with the other party.

The second is to show that they look down on each other completely.

People with this habit must have never performed well in the company, and their abilities are mediocre.

If there is such an action occasionally (not every time), it can be interpreted as "keen to talk".

(4) Look at gestures.Many people often use various gestures consciously or unconsciously when talking. In fact, gestures can often convey the speaker's intentions better than words.

If someone puts one hand next to his mouth, or puts it under his ear, or crosses his hands, and leans forward slightly, it means that he is paying close attention to what the other person is talking about and is listening attentively.

During the conversation, the gesture is open, with the palm facing up, the hands stretched forward, and the hands are at the same height as the abdomen, indicating that they are willing to get close to the other party and hope to establish a good relationship.This gesture will give the other party a feeling of enthusiasm and confidence, and they have a good idea of ​​what they are talking about.

When talking with people, stretch one hand forward, palm down, and then make a large circular movement from left to right, which means that you have a full grasp of the content.In a conversation, the index finger and thumb will be held together, or the fist will be clenched, indicating that the speaker hopes to attract the attention of the audience, or emphasize the importance of the content of his speech.

In addition, they will cover their faces with their hair or hands to prevent the other party from seeing their expressions, which means that this kind of person is inconsistent or intends to hide something.

Pointing your finger at the listener while speaking, or clenching your fist, shrinking your neck, frowning, or other violent gestures generally indicate that the person is potentially aggressive.When speaking, the knees will retract inward, the upper body will lean back, and the hands will be crossed on the abdomen, indicating that the person is extremely insecure and self-confident.

When others are talking, they put on a detached look, either leaning back, touching their chin, yawning, looking around, or pulling the corners of their clothes, adjusting their ties, or brushing their hair from time to time. Impatient in my heart, I hinted that the other party should stop talking.

3. The character code exposed by oral language
A well-known human behaviorist once said: "Humans have two expressions, one is the expression on the face, and the other is the information conveyed to the other party when speaking." It can be seen that language is the second expression of human beings.Spoken language with a high rate of usage and repetition in the vocabulary is gradually formed due to habits in daily life, and has distinct personal characteristics. It has a certain psychological projection function and reveals the speaker's innermost feelings to a certain extent. world.

What oral language exposes is often the inertia of psychology and thinking. The following is an introduction to some common spoken language:
"Why?"

Regardless of whether it is a big or small matter, whether it is fair or unfair, some people will add the sentence "Why?"

It wasn't supposed to be like this, but it happened.Either because of psychological imbalance, or because of cynicism, in short, just can't understand those things that go against the will, and use this spoken phrase repeatedly to complain about grievances and relieve depression.This kind of person is upright, but somewhat neurotic.Harsh, but not necessarily specific to you.Very sensitive to fairness and privilege, "why?" is actually complaining, or accusing, a typical "angry youth" complex.

"Unreliable"

Always talk about "unreliable", worry about everything, feel that "everyone is unreliable" and "everything is unreliable", in fact, they are subjectively "doubting everything".It's just that they themselves never realize that not everything is really suspicious, but only himself.Because you are not sure of the result, you doubt everything. This is not to guard against the passing of time, but to find excuses for not being confident and not daring to bear the result.This kind of person is suspicious, demanding, both detail-oriented and result-oriented, and can't tolerate any mistakes and dissatisfaction, a typical perfectionist.Most of the time, they worry more about their own feelings, it is difficult to put themselves in other people's shoes, and they often attribute some accidental factors subjectively to others.

"That's not how it works"

"Things are not like this", this colloquial sentence is a special reminder, it tells everyone that I will talk about my point of view next.Regardless of formal occasions or private chats, he is very afraid of being ignored, so he always wants to stand out by negating others. To some extent, it can also be seen that his self-identity is relatively low.This kind of person is assertive, self-willed, and vulnerable at the same time.Most of the time, he is "a sharp mouth with a bean curd heart", and he is not necessarily difficult to get along with. As long as you give the necessary respect, he will return to you double the enthusiasm, and "go all the way to the dark", treating you as a loyal partner or close friends.

"I'm dizzy"

I believe this spoken word will make many people have an inexplicable sense of intimacy.No matter MSN is online, in the workplace, or in private chats, "I'm dizzy" can be seen everywhere.Someone handed her the wrong thing, "I'm dizzy"; hearing gossip she doesn't know, "I'm dizzy"; being complimented, "I'm dizzy"; without the car keys, "I'm dizzy"...

(End of this chapter)

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