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Chapter 88 Learn to "Appreciate Others"

Appreciation is a kind of wisdom.Chinese people are good at "destroying" others, but also good at "praising" others.It's just that when it is "destroyed", it is sincere, and when it is "raised", it is against the will.In this sense, in fact, we all "look down" people in our bones. We only think that we are good, and no matter how good others are, they are "nothing more than that".However, our habit of "killing" people is not the same as the "Ah Q spirit" that everyone is familiar with.This is not a simple "self-comfort" mentality of "you can't eat grapes and say grapes are sour" or the so-called "spiritual victory method". We feel from the bottom of our hearts that others are "nothing more than that" and "no big deal at all." , "In some respects it is far worse than myself".That is to say, when it comes to "destroying" people, we are definitely playing for real.That's a really scary thing.The ancients said that "three people walk together, there must be my teacher".It is said that no matter high or low, everyone has something worth learning from.And if we do not distinguish between indiscriminate and "destroy" people as soon as we see them, we will lose the precious opportunity to learn "nutrition" from others.From another perspective, maybe we like the original intention of "destroying" people, just because we don't want to "grow up the ambitions of others and destroy our own prestige". There is nothing wrong with this, but "going too far" will cause endless harm: we will "destroy" in order to "destroy", don't care about Sanqi 21, first "destroy" the other party That's it, let's talk about his vigor.

As a result of doing so, we will become complacent and self-righteous, thus killing our own future growth space with our own hands.Therefore, this kind of "destroying" people is actually "destroying" oneself, which is tantamount to a "suicidal behavior".I am often surrounded by such "killing masters".If you say to him: "Zhang San did this really beautifully!" He will immediately answer you: "This is called beautiful?! I can do better than him with my eyes closed!" If you tell him: " I didn’t expect Li Si’s paintings to be so good.” He would snort immediately: “I’ve never seen a painter before! My son was better at drawing than him when he was five years old!” If you say to him: “Wang Five does have some talent on the A's side."

He will immediately counterattack resolutely like a conditioned reflex: "He is still far behind in B!"... Think about it, if you live and work among these people every day, you can still maintain full enthusiasm and passion ?I am afraid that many "hot" people will be "cooled" by the pots of cold water, and gradually become depressed and despondent.In fact, speaking of it, we Chinese should be the nation that likes to hear "beautiful words" the most in the world, and the nation that is most eager to receive "affirmation" and "praise".But the sad thing is that we Chinese are at the same time the nation that "does not obey anyone", the nation that is the most stingy with "flattering words", and the nation that likes to "destroy" people the most.Therefore, we Chinese are the most difficult nation to hear "beautiful words" from others.This is a big contradiction, a big problem!How to solve?It seems that the only way to "praise yourself" is feasible.Therefore, we can often see such a strange scene in real life: several people sit together, everyone is "praising" themselves, and they can't listen to others at all.Everyone's words are "parallel lines", no one is next to anyone, and there is no boundary at all.You say yours, I say mine.However, this kind of "conversation" of "everyone speaks their own words" can be climaxed one after another, can't stop, and lasts for several hours without stopping, and finally allows all "participants" to fully "enjoy" and leave.

Seeing this weird scene of "talking" with Chinese characteristics, I believe foreigners will be amazed from ear to ear, saying "the cultural difference is really incredible", right?Actually, to be honest, a few years ago, I was also a "master of killing people" with superb kung fu.With a natural "talkative character", I can be said to be "killing countless people".However, what did I gain for myself by "killing" people?Countless blood-stained "south walls" and huge bags on the head, and the little satisfaction of "vanity" that once made me secretly happy.That's all.So, since the age of [-], I finally figured out one thing.That is, the unique charm of the word "appreciation".I finally learned to "appreciate" others, even if the other person has only a little bit of insignificant strengths, it often makes me feel a lot and benefits a lot.Moreover, this kind of appreciation comes not only from "elites", but also from ordinary lives.

I appreciate the meticulousness of the cleaning lady in the company; the sense of responsibility of the security guard; the creativity of young employees; Auntie, carrying a sack with a huge patch, carefully rummaged through the trash cans one by one, and she never saw any phenomenon of "arriving late and leaving early", which moved me very much.Maybe she is fighting for the children who go to school at home?Is it to hope that her children will be more promising in the future, and never follow her old path again?Because of this, she takes the work of "scavenging" very seriously and responsibly.Because she doesn't need anyone's supervision and management, she is working hard for herself and her relatives.This is a kind of "original ecology", the strongest and fullest "living method", which is awe-inspiring! ... In this way, I learned to "appreciate" others and I changed.Become more passionate about work, more loving life, and more loving life. There are fewer "complaints" and more sincere "compliments".There are fewer hassles and relationships are more harmonious.

The heart becomes wider.The world has also become bigger.Living will become more comfortable and pleasant.This is the charm and power of the word "appreciation"!Some people may say: "Chinese people are easy to be proud, and they will turn their tails up if they give two good words. Isn't that harmful to them?" Frankly speaking, I think this sentence is very correct, and it accurately hits our China. People's "soft underbelly".However, I still have to stubbornly "stick to my own point of view" - even so, we must work hard to "appreciate" and "praise", and don't be afraid of others' "tails".

Seriously, if your employees can be "proud cocks," that's your job.Even if they occasionally peck each other and fight each other, in the end their fighting power is better than a large group of listless "trash snacks"!Remember, no matter how much you "appreciate" and "praise" your employees, and how "tail-wagging" your employees are, their "individual heroism" cannot surpass that of Americans—the culture of our ancestors for thousands of years is there. Well, no matter how "serious" they are, they can't change the sky!Conversely, even if you make your employees into "sluggish eggplants", it is impossible for them to become the Japanese who are "beautiful as individuals, but great as a team".

Therefore, "appreciating" your employees and "praising" your employees, although there are indeed sequelae, the advantages definitely outweigh the disadvantages.Because even if they get used to a little "heroism", it is impossible for them to raise their tails to the sky and be as lawless as Americans.In this sense, we Chinese can be said to have gathered all the advantages of the United States and Japan, which is "uniquely blessed"!We not only have the imprint of American "individual heroism", but also have the spirit of Japanese "collectivism".If these two advantages can be fully stimulated, it should be no problem for our enterprises to "destroy" American and Japanese enterprises.

The problem is that our "killing" culture has blocked these unique advantages and turned them one by one into disadvantages that bind us hand and foot.And "appreciation" is the only key to unlock this shackle and release all these advantages.Let's put the knives and guns of "killing" people into the warehouse together, and open the gate of mutual "appreciation"!If we do, we have a chance to witness a miracle together!

(End of this chapter)