Be a Man and Do Things Pillow Book

Chapter 38 Be a Mentally Healthy Person (3)
Therefore, Russell said: "My happiness is increasing day by day, partly because I have finally succeeded in exorcising certain impossible desires. But still more, it is due to the gradual reduction of self-care in the mind. "

Bravely break the wall of indifference.

In today's society, people living in cities spend most of their day in independent spaces made of reinforced concrete, and occasionally communicate with the outside world through telephone and email.Although living in a busy city, people's hearts are sealed by an invisible wall of dust. Because of the lack of nourishment of love, their hearts become more and more indifferent and lonely, and they become distorted and deformed.

A master architect with rich experience and countless masterpieces in his life, but he feels that his biggest regret is to divide the urban space into fragments, and the absolute independence of buildings hastened the indifference of urban human feelings.The master is going to seal the pen after his 65th birthday, and in the final work, he wants to break the traditional design concept and design a channel for residents to communicate and interact, so that people are no longer isolated, but instead filled with big families. Such joy and warmth.

A courageous and forward-thinking real estate agent agreed with his point of view and asked him to design a huge sum of money.After the drawing came out, it was well received by the industry, media and academia.

However, after the master's masterpiece became a reality, the market reaction was very indifferent, and even hit a new low in the property market.

The real estate agent was in a hurry and hurriedly conducted market research.After the survey results came out, people were surprised: the reason why people are unwilling to spend money to buy this kind of house is that such a design makes neighbors communicate too much, which is not conducive to dealing with mutual relations; there is a lot of room for activities in such an environment , the children are not easy to take care of; also, the space is large and the personnel are complicated, which is very unfavorable for things that everyone worries about, such as anti-theft...

The master did not expect that his sealed work would end up like this, and he was deeply saddened.He decided to live in seclusion in the countryside and never go out of the mountains.Before leaving, he said with emotion: "I only know the drawings but not the people. This is the biggest failure in my life." In fact, how can this be blamed on the master? We can tear down the brick walls that separate spaces, but who can tear down the relationship between people and people? What about the thick heart wall between them?
If the heart wall is not removed, the human heart will wither due to lack of oxygen, and people will become depressed and lonely.Love is the good medicine to heal the trauma of the soul, and love is the fertile soil for the healthy growth of the soul.Love, with harmony as its axis, radiates warmth, sweetness and happiness.Love brings tolerance, warmth and happiness to relatives, friends, family, society and mankind.A loveless society is too cold, and a loveless wasteland is too lonely.Love can break the indifference and warm the heart that has been dusty for a long time.

When interacting with others, open the window of your heart, and don't be stingy with the love in your heart, because only lovers will be loved.You will get many beautiful legends about love; when you are in trouble, you will get a lot of loving care and help.

The most important thing for a person to live in the world is not to be loved, but to have the ability to love others.If you don't know how to love, how can you be loved?Friends, throw away your indifference, open your dusty heart, release the love in your heart, your life will be more wonderful because of love.

Free yourself from despair, the poison of the soul.

A friend in business lost everything because of inaccurate information.Everyone persuaded him to accumulate strength and wait for a time to make a comeback, but he drank his sorrows all day long, desperate to live, and desperate to the extreme.In order to persuade him to wake up from despair as soon as possible, one of his friends told him such a story:
There was a young man, one day, because of a bad mood, he walked out of the house and wandered aimlessly. Unknowingly, he came to the depths of the forest.Here he heard the melodious birdsong, saw the beautiful flowers and plants, his mood gradually improved, he wandered, feeling the beauty and happiness of life.Suddenly, there was a whistling wind around him, and when he looked back, he was frightened out of his wits, and it turned out that it was a ferocious tiger rushing towards him with its teeth and claws.He ran as fast as he could, and ran under a big tree. He saw a big hole under the tree, and a thick tree vine penetrated into the hole from the tree. Almost without thinking, he grabbed the tree vine and slid down. , this place may be the safest place to escape the catastrophe.

He breathed a sigh of relief, grasping the vines tightly with both hands, listening to the movement outside, and stretching out his head to have a look from time to time.The tiger paced up and down all around, refusing to leave for a long time.The young man's hanging heart became tense again, he raised his head uneasily, and he was surprised again by seeing a squirrel with sharp teeth constantly biting the tree vine, although the tree vine was thick, How long can it survive a squirrel bite?He subconsciously looked down at the bottom of the cave, it was amazing!At the bottom of the cave, there are four big snakes, all staring at each other, with long cores sticking out of their mouths.Fear came from all directions, and he was completely pessimistic.There are tigers climbing out, and poisonous snakes jumping down. You can’t get up or down. If you think it’s too bad, there’s that squirrel biting the vines. He even heard the squirrels where the vines were bitten. The unstoppable sound.

The young man thought: It is impossible to hang still, the vines will not let you hang; jumping down is also a dead end, and there is no place to escape; but outside, there are terrible tigers, but there are also birdsong, It has a floral fragrance.Young people think, is this the destiny of life?In the dark, he heard a voice shouting: "Don't be afraid, run." So he didn't think about it, and climbed up one by one. He finally climbed to the ground and saw the tiger in the tree. He closed his eyes and rested his mind (yes, there is a time to close his eyes in adversity), he seized this opportunity, ran wildly, finally got rid of the tiger, and returned home safely.

In the theme song of the popular TV series "Desire" a few years ago, he sang: "Life is a mess, and there are also small lumps that cannot be untied; life is a road, and there are countless potholes... Life The road to life cannot always be smooth. Difficulties, setbacks, and even desperation are unavoidable. Desperation is not terrible. As long as people do not despair, as long as the courage to fight against difficulties is still in the heart, even if the mountains and rivers are exhausted, there will be bright future. when.

Despair is the poison of the soul, it will devour a person's will and corrode a person's fighting spirit.Halsey said: "There are no desperate situations, only people who are desperate for situations." There has never been a real "hopeless situation" in the world: no matter how long the night is, the sun will always rise; Will blow the green earth.Now that winter has come, can spring be far behind?

Wasting time is an unforgivable crime.

What is the time?
Time is the first wealth in life.When a person first comes into the world, time is his only wealth.

Time is life.The so-called life is the process of gradually spending time.Some people need status, so they exchange their time for power; some people need wealth, and they exchange it for money bit by bit;

If you love your life, you should cherish your time, use it rationally, and never let a day go by.

There are many records about how the ancients cherished time. Ban Gu’s "Hanshu Shihuozhi" contains: "Winter, the people have entered; women work together in the alley, weaving at night, and female workers get 45 days in January." How can January be What about the 45th?Yan Shigu commented on this: "In one month, there are fifteen days in the middle of the night, a total of 45 days." This is very clear. It turns out that the ancients counted the time of each night as For half a day, there are fifteen more days in one month. This is a very scientific and reasonable use of time.

All successful people throughout the ages have taken their own lives very seriously. When they live a day, they always work as much as possible, work as much as possible, and study as much as possible.

Time is the fairest thing in the world, the rich and the poor are allotted 24 hours a day.It's just that some people will make good use of it, while others will squander it recklessly.The spendthrift complains of not having enough time.In fact, time is like water in a sponge, as long as you are willing to squeeze it, there will always be some.As Goethe said: "We have plenty of time, if we use it properly."

A student complained to the teacher, "I don't have enough time."

So the teacher found a box and put some big stones in it, which seemed to be full at this time.But the teacher asked the students to put some marbles in, and many marbles could be placed in the gaps between the stones.In this way, it seems that the box is full again.But the teacher asked the students to pour in a bucket of fine sand, and when the fine sand couldn't fit, they could actually pour in a bucket of water.

Finally, the teacher said to the students: "You see that the box is full, but you can still put things in. You seem to feel that the time is full, but there are still some idle times that can be used."

Time is the soil of all achievements in the world.Time brings pain to dreamers, happiness to creators, and those who waste their time will be destroyed by time.

"An inch of time is worth an inch of gold, and an inch of gold cannot buy an inch of time." We must learn to save time and never live a life of wasting time and wasting time.Mark Twain said: "We count every inch of the hours that pass; and we feel the pain and sorrow of being parted from them, like a miser who sees his savings go to the robber, penny by penny. The same feeling you get when you take it and you can't stop it."

Carnegie said: "The secret of becoming a rich man is that you do business every day and are already proficient in the way of making a living. The following two points are the secret. That is: 'diligence' and 'cherishing time'." Diligent people are time The master of the world, lazy people are slaves of time, would you like to be a slave?Are you willing to not work hard when you are young, and let sadness torture your heart when you are old?

Too much whining is the sworn enemy of happiness.

Talking in the streets, chatting after dinner, you can often hear some people complaining.They often think that they are the most wronged one in the world, even more wronged than Dou E.They complain about low jobs, low income, and harsh bosses; they complain that their wives are ugly and not gentle in life... In short, they complain about everything that is not to their liking in life to vent their personal anger.

There will always be times when people are discouraged and dissatisfied, and it is not a bad idea to complain at this time, but if you complain all day long, no matter big or small, good or bad, as long as it doesn't suit you and blame others, it is a bit abnormal.

There was such a story:
According to legend, the abbot of a monastery set a special rule for the monastery: every year at the end of the year, the monks in the monastery have to say two words to the abbot.At the end of the first year, the abbot asked the new monk what he wanted most, and the new monk said, "The bed is hard." At the end of the second year, the abbot asked him what he wanted most, and he replied, "The food is bad." At the end of the year, without waiting for the abbot to ask, he said: "Farewell." The abbot looked at the new monk's back and said to himself: "There is a demon in my heart, and it is difficult to achieve a positive result. What a pity! What a pity!"

New monks have a negative attitude towards the world, so they can't be content with the status quo and complain blindly.And his complaints also made him lose the opportunity to achieve a positive result.

No matter whether you complain or complain, it is because you have the wrong attitude and look at the problem from the wrong angle. If you can change the angle with a positive attitude, I believe that people's mood will suddenly improve.Whether a thing is good or bad in a person's mind depends on the person's state of mind, not the thing itself, as the saying goes, "If you look at the outside world with me, everything outside will be colored by me".Those who are full of complaints may wish to change their mood and let optimism dominate themselves, and their mood will definitely improve all of a sudden.The following story tells exactly that:

Yu Zhonglin, a famous traditional Chinese painting painter in China, is good at painting peonies.

Once, someone asked for a painting of peonies that he personally painted. After returning, he happily hung it in the living room.

A friend of this person saw it and shouted that it was unlucky, because the peony was not completely painted, and a part was missing, and the peony represents wealth, and a corner is missing. Isn't it "incomplete wealth"?

This person was also very surprised when he saw it, thinking that it is always wrong to miss one side of the peony, so he took it back and planned to ask Yu Zhonglin to repaint it.After hearing his reason, Yu Zhonglin had an idea, and told the buyer that since the peony represents wealth, if the lack of one side means boundless wealth, isn't it?

After hearing his explanation, the man thought it was reasonable, and happily went back holding the painting.

The same painting, because of different mentality, produces different views.Therefore, we should maintain a positive attitude in everything, and think of the good, instead of seeing things as unpleasant, so that there will be less worries, pains, and complaints, and more joy and peace.

This is the reality, we must face it calmly and not just complain, otherwise, if we miss the punctual bus in life while complaining, we will miss the next opportunity to take the punctual bus while complaining.

Only a contented mind can have lasting happiness.

There is an old saying: "The prosperity of the world is for profit, and the prosperity of the world is for profit." Profit is of course the most effective lubricant for social development, but one should not place too much emphasis on fame and fortune, and run around endlessly for fame and fortune.

With the development of the commodity economy, each of us lives in an environment that pays attention to efficiency. It is impossible to be completely silent about fame and fortune, but we should treat fame and fortune correctly. , justifiably.”

Of course, the best way to live is to be indifferent to fame and wealth.Because there is a mouth under the name, if a person is famous, he will attract jealousy, be looked down upon, and be excluded, and it may even cause disaster.Just as the old saying goes: "If a tree is beautiful in the forest, the wind will destroy it; if the embankment is higher than the bank, the current will be turbulent; if the line is higher than people, it must be wrong." And a knife next to the word "利" will hurt yourself, It may also hurt others. Small benefits can hurt harmony and hinder big benefits.If you think that self-interest is everything, you will lose everything that is precious in life.

Fame and fortune are endless, and only when enough is enough can we be content and happy.In fact, the heart is the ruler of a person, and fame and fortune come from the heart. If the desire for fame and fortune in the heart expands endlessly, people will never be satisfied.Desire is like walking with others. When you see others walking ahead with a lot of fame and fortune, you will not stop. If you want to walk ahead with more fame and fortune, you will only end up tired at the end of the road.Those who are content can see through the essence of fame and fortune, can take it in their hearts and let it go, and have a naturally broad mind.

If a person develops an attitude towards life that is indifferent to fame and fortune, it will be easier for him to find an optimistic side when facing life.But many people keep saying that they take fame and fortune very lightly, and even make a gesture of loathing fame and fortune. In fact, they cannot get rid of the temptation of fame and fortune in their hearts and make self-deceiving gestures. .Like to be a person who hates the theory of fame and fortune, he will not let go of his lofty reputation in his heart. Although this kind of person is smarter than those who pursue fame and fortune, he has not completely forgotten fame and fortune.These people who don't agree with each other are actually full of contradictions in their hearts, but fame and fortune itself is not at fault.If you can think what you think in your heart, say what you say in your mouth, and your heart and mouth are the same, and you are completely indifferent to fame and fortune, you will naturally be free from the influence of fame and fortune.Then not only will your life be easier for yourself, but it will also be easier for you to communicate with others.

Lin Yutang, a master of Chinese studies, once said: "The secret of contentment lies in knowing how to enjoy what one has and being able to drive out material desires beyond one's ability."

(End of this chapter)