There are ways to speak and speak skills

Chapter 13 Talking to Your Lover → Strategies of Love (2)
In the 19th century, the famous French microbiologist Louis Bastet expressed his love in a very distinctive way.When Buster was teaching at the University of Strasbourg in France, he met Miss Marie, the daughter of the principal Laurent. After the friendship lasted for a while, Buster fell in love with Mary deeply.So he wrote proposal letters to Mr. Laurent, Mrs. Laurent, and Miss Mary respectively.In addition to expressing his sincere love, Buster wrote in a letter to Mr. Laurent: "I should tell you the following facts first, so that you can easily decide to allow or refuse. My family is well-off and I don't have much property. I estimate that my fortune is no more than 5 francs, and I have already decided to give my share to my sisters. Therefore, I can be regarded as a poor man. All I have is health, courage, and a sense of science. Love, however, I'm not one to study science for status."

Buster's speech is very frank, very honest, and with fiery emotion, he finally got Miss Mary's love.

It is natural, without affectation, lively, pure and healthy, making people feel infinite vitality, a natural expression of emotion, and a natural confession of the soul.

Lenin's "first love conversation" with his wife Krupskaya seems to have the color of legend.Lenin himself said jokingly that he met Krupskaya on the banks of the Volga River and "fell in love while eating the fourth spring pancake".Because Lenin was busy working for the revolution day and night, and had no time to take care of his personal love affairs, he could only bury the seeds of love deeply in his heart.It was not until Lenin and Krupskaya were arrested, in prison, that Lenin wrote to Krupskaya with chemical potions, pouring out the fiery love buried in his heart.Afterwards, Lenin was exiled to Siberia. During his life in exile, he couldn't restrain the pain of lovesickness, so he proposed marriage in a letter to Krupskaya.At the end of the letter, Lenin wrote: "Please be my wife." Lenin's frank and sincere marriage proposal made Krupskaya very excited, and she bravely ran to the frigid Siberia without hesitation. , lived and fought with Lenin.

At a ball in Paris in 1920, Captain de Gaulle invited Miss Wangduluo to say: "I am honored to know you, miss, it is a great honor for me, it is an inexplicable honor..." Wangduluo said: "Isn't it Mr. Captain, I don’t know anything more beautiful than your words, and more beautiful than this moment...” They danced and confided, and when they finished the sixth dance, they had sworn to each other for life .This lightning love is indeed love at first sight!
Psychological tips:

From the above three classic cases, it can be seen that fiery emotions and frank and bold words will often impress the long-awaited lover.

Love is blind and impulsive, and the power source of this impulsiveness comes from your frank and resolute passionate expression, because those fiery words will also make your lover's heart become Be more blind and impulsive, so that you can achieve your wishes smoothly, and lovers will eventually get married.

love to pour out to avoid tragedy
People's desire to pour out is as indispensable as food and daily life.If there is no opportunity, no place, and no object to confide in, then not only troubles and depressions, but also many tragedies will follow.What people pour out may be their own inner distress.Maybe it's inner joy, maybe it's expecting others' understanding, maybe it's hoping to get their love.In short, the result of pouring out is communication. Without communication, even husband and wife will have different dreams, and even good friends will become estranged day by day.

There is such a story:
One cold night on St. Sylvester's Day one year, Dr. Ray, a coroner from the Metropolitan Police Service, was called to perform an autopsy in a very shabby furnished flat.The deceased was a college student who hanged himself that night. He was in his twenties. He lived in a simple single room. A few pages of scribbled paper fascinated me.He glanced at it first, then read it carefully before realizing that it was a suicide note.

The unfortunate young man wrote the reasons for his suicide in his suicide note.On the surface.It's because I can't stand loneliness.He was alone, had no relatives, no friends, and had no money.Christmas is here, and he especially yearns for warmth, love, and happiness.

He lived next door to a girl whom they sometimes passed on the stairs whose "angelic looks" had often touched his heart.

That night, as he was struggling with his grief and discouragement, there were creaking and gasping noises from the next door.The young man said in his suicide note that those voices had obvious characteristics, and it was very easy to guess what they meant.Probably those voices never stopped when he wrote the suicide note, because he described it in great detail, as if he wanted to seek relief from anger and contempt, and the scribbled handwriting revealed his agitated and irritable mood, and the lines were full of remorse and despair.

He wrote in his suicide note: For an hour straight, he heard exactly the hoarse panting of joy and the crunch of the shaking bedstead.It was the nasty frolic that anyone had ever heard with their ears pressed against a wall.Especially when he was feeling lonely, depressed, and bored, and the joyous moaning of his angelic neighbor pierced his heart.

The young man also admitted that he had secretly fallen in love with the girl, "she is so beautiful, I dare not even talk to her".He cursed viciously at a world he no longer wanted to set foot in.

In short, the young man's full heart at that time is on paper.He was very pure in heart, but obviously too sensitive, very intensely lonely, very painful from the longing for love, no doubt he was in love with the mysterious "angel", but, because of shyness, he dared not speak to her .At this moment, he heard the "angel" make a human voice through the wall.So, he tore off the strings from the curtains and bid farewell to his life...

After reading the suicide note, Dr. Lei signed the autopsy report.Before leaving, I listened carefully for a while, but there was no movement on the other side of the wall.Probably the "angel" next door and her lover have stopped playing, and at this moment, they may have both fallen asleep.

As the doctor was about to go down the stairs with the police and the displeased hostess of the apartment, whose horror had not yet completely subsided, a sudden curiosity arose—that the girl who had just been frolicking in the next room was having fun with her. After all, there was only a thin wall between the deceased and her boyfriend. Maybe they have something to tell us and add some new information.Of course, I can't rule out wanting to see that "angel-like woman", because her slight screams and gasps actually caused such a tragic tragedy.

So the doctor knocked on the door next door.

But no one answered for a long time.Dr. Lei shrugged his shoulders, as if he saw the two people huddled together under the quilt and panicked.The hostess of the apartment knocked three more times.And shouted: "Miss Jones! Miss Jones!" Then she took out her own bunch of keys and opened the door.Then, just hearing an exclamation, the hostess rushed out of the door, her face contorted with fright.

Dr. Lei walked in, opened the curtains, glanced at the bed, and immediately understood the truth of the matter. The college student who hanged himself completely misunderstood the nature of the noises coming from the next door.The fair-haired girl's head was resting on the bolster, and the pain of the arsenic attack had not erased her beauty. The girl had been dead for several hours, and she must have struggled a long time before dying.There was a suicide note on the table, and it seemed that the girl committed suicide because she couldn't stand loneliness and felt extremely disgusted with life.

What a sad story.Two wandering lonely souls have been added to the kingdom of heaven.Pretty blonde, young lad, why don't you bother knocking on that wall with each other?Why don't you say hello to each other when the stairs meet?Why not talk about our woes over a pot of coffee on a cold night?Maybe the young man told the girl about his admiration, which would give her some hope in life; maybe the girl would feel a lot of warmth in the world after hearing the young man's talk; maybe the young man's talk could resolve the loneliness; maybe the girl The narration will make the young man have the emotion of "the same people are fallen in the end of the world, why should we know each other when we meet"; maybe meeting a cheerful girl, her sweet smile will give the young man the courage to talk; maybe meeting a strong personality He'll slam that wall, lad, or call up his mistress, and solve the mystery of the crunch or the wheeze.However, because of the lack of language communication, they missed the opportunity to get acquainted, know each other, and love each other, and both of them came to a dead end.

Psychological tips:

This story may inspire you.When you encounter depression and loneliness in your life, you might as well talk to the good friend you think. Explanation: Before you want to end your life for some reason, you might as well beat the "wall" around you vigorously, maybe there is a heart suffering from depression on the other side of the "wall".

Depression and loneliness are not good things after all. If you can't actively express your emotions, it will cause a lot of regrets.Not speaking when it is time to speak has caused you to miss many good opportunities and alienate your friends.

Get rid of self-cleaning and self-pitying characters, and make a few close friends; say what you have to say, no longer swallow what you should say because you are afraid of being ridiculed, boldly do what you want to do, and say what you want to say boldly.People can't live alone for a lifetime, when it's time to say it, you must say it!
ingenious planning well-arranged
In the process of communicating with girls, it is not sure whether the girl opposite can become your wife, so you must be careful when speaking.Don't rush to say: "I love you!" You should judge the situation, plan cleverly, arrange carefully, and then express your love.

As much as you may like your date, it's best not to say "like" on a first date.Because the first date does not know the other party's mind very well, if you mention this kind of question rashly, it will make the other party feel frightened and at a loss, and you may not have a second date.

If the other party is willing to go to the appointment, they should not hate themselves too much.Don't forget that "love" is not wishful thinking, it is naturally cultivated through dating again and again.Even if you don't say "like", as long as you can feel that the other person is friendly to you, this is the expression of "like".As long as you don't specifically say "like", there should be a high possibility that the other party will readily accept the second date.Also, saying the words "I love you" is likely to backfire.

There is such a plot in a documentary novel: In the summer of 1960, on a Saturday afternoon, a young man with good features and fashionable clothes held a bouquet of red roses and politely knocked on the door of an apartment.The owner of the apartment is Heinz, the young female secretary of the Federal Foreign Office of the Federal Republic of Germany.She opened the door cautiously, she was at a loss in the face of this uninvited guest.In embarrassment, the man apologized again and again: "I knocked on the wrong door, it was a misunderstanding, please forgive me." Then he turned and left.

Before taking two steps, he turned around and walked over to Heinz and said, "Please accept this bouquet of flowers as compensation for disturbing you." Heinz was so kind and invited him into the room, the two of them just like that. acknoledged.In fact, this accidental misunderstanding was planned by the young man long ago.However, a well-intentioned "deception" like this does not hurt the other party.

Psychological tips:

This level of zeal is necessary for a relationship to be successful.Usually, most people don't make special plans, what to say in a limited time of a few minutes.However, as long as you try it once, if you practice speaking on a regular basis, there should be unexpected results.Don't be too eloquent, just try your best to convey your sincerity to the other party and let him (her) know it.

Usually if you are afraid of giving the other party a bad impression when you meet for the first time, you can carefully arrange the date situation in advance. Leave a good impression of you in the other person's heart.

(End of this chapter)