Your loneliness is more moving than this world

Chapter 1 Preface
Confessions of a pseudo-writer

In the past year, many things have happened, most of which have never been experienced in the seven years since I came to Beijing. There are surprises and surprises.

About one day in September 2013, Xiaohui, the editor of Beidou.com, went online and said to me: "Chao, your article was liked by ONE, and they asked you if you could repost it, and there was a fee for it." I said, "What is ONE? ?” She said: “Do you know Han Han?” I said: “Yes.” She said: “That’s all right.” She continued: “You’re going to be famous, Chao, congratulations.”

I agreed to Xiaohui and invited her to have a meal near the company, but I really didn't think much about it other than the manuscript fee.At that time, all my emotions were at work, and I thought of leaving. I have this experience, no matter how much pain the work brings you, go to work in another place, and you will recover quickly.Beijing has this magic power.

It is very interesting that when the occupational diseases accumulated for many years brought me unprecedented pain in the workplace, literature, the first amateur hobby, showed a state of thin hair after accumulation.Since May 2010, I have written essays and diaries on Douban for three years, but no one cares about them. Almost all of my more than 5 fans come to my photo album. In June 1000, I wrote "Licking the Knife to Hate, Killing People in a Ghost Night". As usual, few people read it. It has only been read more than a hundred times, and there are even few recommendations.One day two months later, I woke up and turned on the computer. I saw a bunch of reminders at the top of the page, and knew it was popular. Two days later, the number of Douban users who recommended this article became thousands.This number really terrified me. You must know that Douban is not the same as Weibo or Renren. This place is known as the gathering place for Chinese literary youth, with the most pretentious airs and the most discerning spiritual senses in China.

I forgot how many followers "Lick the Knife Head and Hate, Ghost Night Kills" gained so many fans on the Douban homepage, but it was just the first firecracker of the new year. In October 2013, I wrote a short story "Sister's War" for ONE, copied and pasted it to Douban, and was recommended to the homepage by the administrator, with more than 10 referrals in a single day.In the next half month, "Love in the Celestial Dynasty" and "Sunset Tiantongyuan" were recommended to the homepage one after another. The number of referrals in a single day exceeded 2000, and "Sunset Tiantongyuan" was even recommended [-] times in two days.

It is often said that when a man is 20 to 40 years old, there will always be one or two opportunities to change his life. Such opportunities are fleeting, and they may be lost if they are not well prepared or treated lazily. The sensation caused by "Sunset Tiantongyuan" really made me see the efficiency of the media era. Publishers, film companies, independent producers, and tabloid reporters came in droves. The cursing, in short, this is really popular.

I declined everyone and set myself a humble year-end goal: over [-] Douban fans.I do brand planning work, and I know the importance of the market to a brand. Without the support of consumers, even a rose will wilt quickly.I can't rush, I have to take my time like a job, I am not afraid of losing this opportunity, because I love literature, whether it treats me well or not, I should treat it sincerely.

In addition to literature, there are girls who need to be treated sincerely.The end of the year is approaching, and under the pressure of forced marriage, I once again found the girl I had dated for more than a year, and asked her: "Do you want to consider getting together?" She said: "No." I said: "Why?" Said: "Our personalities are not suitable." I said with bottomless loss: "Okay, let's be ordinary friends."

It seems that all we can pursue is career.There was once a little fat man who failed in chasing a goddess and came to me in misery for "chicken soup". I said to him, "Go and make money." Vulgar sister, you are rich and have no shortage of girls to send to your door. Even if you can't get love, you can get girls. Even if you can't get girls, you can still get money. It's better than you have nothing now. Money is not vulgar, vulgar It's people."

There is a passage in the climax of "You Are Like That Boy I Met": "I am 28 years old, and I want to get money. I am no exception in this era. Only by taking money can I keep a woman who does not need feelings. Only by taking money can I get money." Start the so-called mainstream good life. I have no roots, no one can rely on, I have to fight myself, I have to walk forward against the wind, I have to be like the crowd rushing forward at the Metro Communication University Station three years ago In that way, I can squeeze out a piece of my own territory in this place that doesn't belong to me. If I succeed, I will be happy, if I fail, it's nothing, there are other things in life, isn't it?"

You see, three years ago I was able to write such an aura of big words, but when I was in front of the girl, I became a bag that I couldn't let go of.

The last conversation I had with her that year was like this, she asked me: "When you become a writer and become famous, will you become that kind of bastard who messes with men and women?" I said: "I will, God give I don’t have much, and I have tried my best to love, if I really develop, I want to treat myself better.”

But is this really what is in my heart?As an emotional man, who doesn't want a girl who treats him well to know each other and stay with him forever?But the one who loves me and the one I love may not necessarily understand me.

thank you all!

what is love?It is not as long-lasting as friendship, as deep as family affection, and as persistent as hobbies. It is just a firework flying up in the cold night sky, gorgeous but short-lived.

What is lovelorn?It doesn't hurt your family, it doesn't take away your talent, it doesn't affect your career, it just ends your relationship with another person watching fireworks.

And you will meet many people in your life.

(End of this chapter)