The Complete Works of Xu Zhimo's Classical Prose

Chapter 4 Catching Duckweed on the Edge of Autumn Dream (3)
That's right, the sofa, if there were no such sofa in the attic, the owner's style would lose a very important element.To say that the spring in its stomach is completely dead is too humble for the owner, but it is simply slandered for me.Because there is clearly a part of the inner spring that has never been completely dead, and it looks like a watershed in the middle, with the left and right tilting down. When I sat down for the first time, I was not careful that it was still elastic, but I was shocked. Take a look; the cloth that rests on the hand is really moldy, it is black, black, yellow, and yellow, like the sleeves of the master's shirt.I was sitting down, he bit his lips, rolled his eyes and smiled slightly.What are you laughing at?I laughed that the way you sat on the sofa reminded me of Ai Ling.Who is Ai Ling?She is my first model.model?your?You have a broken house and a model, you poor ghost can afford it... Don't worry, after all, you are a newcomer from China, after hearing the model, you are so active, you have red marks on your neck!It’s not a big deal at first, of course, but I’m talking about a broken chicken shed like yours...what’s the matter with a broken chicken shed, Jesus was born in a stable, and the angels kneel and worship in the stable!Take it easy, good friend, I tell you to listen.If there's one good thing about being a Parisian, he's not snobby!The worst thing about Chinese people is this; the poor have the snobbery of the poor, the rich have the snobbery of the rich, and the half-declined have the half-declined snobbery, that is half-civilized and barbaric!You look like me, with hair like a hedgehog, a beard that hasn’t been shaved for eight or nine days, dirty clothes that haven’t been cleaned for half a year, and leather shoes that can’t be buckled. If anyone calls me a beggar from a foreign country, then I deserve to be admitted to the Beijing Hotel It's a kind of snobbery; but in Paris, I just casually ask a girl with a beautiful dress and a well-painted neck to dance like this. Nine out of ten times, do you believe it?As for models, that's even more unreasonable. How about someone who studies fine arts in Paris, no matter how poor he is, can't get a dozen or so bright-eyed ones to sit in a year?What's more, a broken house?Bo Ximin's life is like this, according to you, a model should not sit on the sofa, you have to prepare a grand master chair made of apricot yellow satin embroidered with Dan Feng Chaoyang as a cushion, so that you can feel at ease, right?Besides...

Say no more!I don't know much about the world, and I'm an old fool from the country. But when it comes to modeling, I'm a little curious. Why don't you tell me some experiences to give me insight?Is it really good?We saw Venus de Milo in the Academy of Fine Arts, Venus de Milo, the wife of Venus de Milo, as well as those of Tie Qing, Lu Banshi, Bao Diqianli, Ding Dao Lai Du, and Ji Oqianne. Is nudity just too beautiful, too ideal, too impossible, too unbelievable?On the other hand, the new schools, such as Schneech York, Mathis, Cézanne, Gao Geng, and Franz Marc, are too ugly, too detrimental, too inhuman, and the same is too improbable and too Incredible.The beauty of the human body, what is going on?We unfortunately grew up in a world where Chinese women's clothes are worn all the way to the bottom of the chin, and there is no big difference between the waist and the back. It is really too ignorant and too blind.But then again, Orientals probably shouldn’t be eye-opening at all. Have you read John Barrish’s Sayanara? His description of a naked Japanese dancing girl is like a face powdered like a coffin. In addition, after the ears and below the chin, it is like a piece of pearl rice that cannot be steamed through!It was disgusting to watch.Only those of you who study art have first-hand experience, but I...

You're kind of envious, aren't you?Don't blame you, people are always people.To tell you the truth, my original motivation for learning to paint was my curiosity about the secrets of the human body.You say I'm poor, yes, I'm really poor, I can't eat, I can't wear enough clothes, but I can't afford to be a model.This appreciation of the beauty of the human body has become for me a physical requirement, a necessary luxury, an inescapable indulgence; I prefer to eat less, save a few francs, and hire more models.You can almost say that I am obsessed, sick, crazy, whatever I like to say, I admit that I cannot live a day without a naked woman lying in front of me to support, comfort, and feed my body" Eye wank".At the beginning, I guess Rodin must have been in the same distress as me. It is said that there were always stripped women in his house, and he didn’t want to sit there. Just looking at their "practical" and varied postures in daily life, he is a shepherd People, watching a group of flayed tame sheep all day long!Mr. Lu Ban, the vicious master, said that it was very difficult for his wife to be a model, but because he kept drawing his wife all day long, he rarely even had time to wear trousers!But if this is true Master Lu Ban is still too stupid, no wonder the women in his paintings are all monotonous like a stripped white pig, with little change; the distribution of beauty in the human body is a very mysterious phenomenon, I do not believe that there is an ideal whole I think it is almost impossible for men and women; God held a handful of colors and sprinkled them on the ground. Roses, Roland, pomegranates, hostas, and autumn flowers were all stained with one or more kinds of colors, but There is absolutely no one kind of flower that contains all possible hues. If there is one, theoretically speaking, wouldn't it have to return to the original colorless?The same is true of the beauty of the human body. Some beauty is in the chest, some waist, some lower part, some hair, some hands, some ankles, the incomprehensible combination of bones, muscles, and textures, forming different lines , the change of tone, the swelling of the leather surface, the distribution of the capillaries, the natural posture, and the unstoppable expression, you have to take the trouble to experience it carefully. God will never give you a specific one. Absolute beauty, all our artistic endeavors would be meaningless; the subtlety lies in the fact that you know there is gold in the mountain, but at that point you have to work hard to find it yourself.Ah!Speaking of the artist's aesthetic instinct, I really want to close my eyes and thank God. If it weren't for it, wouldn't all the beauty of the human body, to say the least, be changed? Thin clothes are buried!I’ll show you a treasure under my broken bed. I’ve worked so hard over the past ten years to copy thousands of human bodies, and nine-tenths of them were hooked in this broken chicken shed. Don’t underestimate it. At least one or two hundred women worthy of a beautiful name have sat on this sofa of mine, which has been mourned for a long time!Not to mention those who specialize in modeling, the one in Paris doesn’t know what my yellow face is. In the appreciation of beauty, as a result, in my "kinky eyes", a naked woman is just like a dead body turned out of the Zixia Palace. I can't shake my sexual desire. On the other hand, it is really neatly dressed. A woman, no matter she is standing in the crowd or walking on the road, as long as my eyes see her, the obstacles of her clothes will be invisible. Just as an experienced miner recognizes a mine seedling at a glance, my artistic instinct is also a glance Just recognize "Mei Miao", I can't be wrong once in a hundred times; every time I see the possibility, I have to try to find her and strip her naked so that I can see it satisfactorily, God bless this civilized Paris, I am disappointed What a rare time!I remember seeing a noble lady in the theater once, and I really couldn’t think about it (of course I tried). Not to mention my discomfort, it’s worse than malaria, and her specialty is clearly in the lower abdomen and...

Enough is enough!I'm telling you it's itchy.Body beauty!This knowledge, this blessing, we unfortunately grew up in the East, who has the opportunity to study and enjoy it?But now that I'm in Paris and I'm lucky enough to meet you again, I really want to open my eyes to your light. You have to think for me and find the one that is closest to your ideal in your rich experience. ...

You are wrong again!What, do you mean that the flowers should have the fragrance of Paris, and the human body should have the beauty of Paris?Too much to destroy my prestige!Don't believe that Barris or Sayanara nonsense; listen to me, just as the roses in the East are no less fragrant than the roses in the West, so the human body in the East is no less beautiful than the Western body when it is properly cultivated. Natural limits, such as the size of the bones, the color of the skin.At the same time, the most important thing is of course that you have aesthetic activities in your own soul, and you have to have eyes, otherwise, no matter how beautiful and miraculous the universe itself is, it will come to you for nothing.After ten years of hard work in Paris, I have a great wish for the future: I want to widen my trained "kinky eyes" and go to the East to discover the beauty of the human body. Who says I don't have big articles to write?As for you to use my light to open your eyes, that is the easiest thing to do, but I think it's a pity!There is Madame Langsa, who used to be a physics lecturer at the University of Paris. You will never forget it. She is gone now and has gone to London; Shopkeeper, she is enough to knock down all your Ding Dao Lai Du, all Li Qing, and all Ji Oqianne, especially for you who are not into the class, she is so beautiful, she can't see a bone in her whole body The shadow, which is hidden by the uniform flesh, is round, smooth, and has a consistent rhythm. It is so wonderful that a hundred gods can't describe it completely, especially her structure below the waist is really a miracle!You should have seen the afterimage of Sironi Venus when you came from Italy, but it’s just like that, you don’t know the magic of the living breath, no great artistic genius can be transplanted onto canvas or stone sculpture (So ​​I often debate in my heart whether art is higher than nature or nature is higher than art. I am afraid that God has more chances to preempt than ordinary people); The two intersecting arcs of the upper thigh run straight down to the ground of the feet, and the waves of the flesh are like the music you listen to in your dreams: unbelievably soft, unbelievably even , the unbelievable charm is thicker, the line where the two strands meet goes straight to the end, without leaking a single flaw, it is absolutely impossible for you to pass a strand of hair or blow a breath of wind, but At the same time, it is definitely not fat sticking, so stay away.What a dream!Alas, what a pity that such a beautiful genius was ruined by a six-foot-three-inch baker with a red beard; indeed, the fate of this world is really strange, I rarely see beautiful women who do not marry monkeys and cattle An ugly man like a water horse!But this is a cliché.As far as I can recruit, there are quite a few who are qualified. Just now when you sat on this sofa, I thought of Ai Ling. Maybe you have a destiny with her, so I will recruit her for you. I think it should be Can be easily recruited.But where?After all, this room is not an ideal background for appreciating beautiful women. Firstly, it is not well developed, and secondly, the light is not enough. At least it is for the sake of laymen like you... I have a very good idea. If you are a visitor from afar, you should treat you once in a unique way. Fortunately, Ailing is very familiar with me, and she can do whatever I want her to do; let's make an appointment the day after tomorrow, you come to me at twelve o'clock in the morning, and we will go to the big forest of Fontaine Polo together. The places I often visit, especially the area near Afang Qishi, are full of natural carpets. This is the most beautiful day of nature. There are many trees, not very scary, very fun, we decided to go to that area to have a secret picnic An impression that fades!I will arrange everything. If you are willing to contribute, you don't need anything else. I just want you to buy more big red bayberries, and bring a bottle of orange wine and a bottle of green wine. We will enjoy half a day of leisure.Now I'm tired of talking, I have to lie down for a while, I'll take the secret book under my bed and give you a little bit to figure it out...

When we returned to Paris the next day from the Fontaine-Beaurois, it seemed to me that I had just had the most absurd, most beautiful, and most secret dream.

14

原刊1925年12月16/17/24日《晨报副刊》，
In "The Claws of Paris", the second part of which is also included in "Roulette"

Traveling in Europe (optional)
[-]. Opening

When you promise to do something, a knot is tied in your heart; if this knot is not untied, and your affairs are not completed, you will not be comfortable for a day. This is the meaning of "If you don't be a middleman, you won't be a guarantee, and you will have no troubles in your life".Who told me to come out this time and agree to the newsletter?I remember sending one on the Siberian road, but since then, for about a month and a half, I haven’t sent a word. The debt is getting more and more difficult to pay off. Every day and night, I burn the knot in my heart and say to myself .At the same time, I know that some of my friends in China must also be surprised. They must say: "You see that the doorman is not reliable. How good he promised when he left, saying that there will be a letter to report his whereabouts at any time. Now it has been two months. It's almost full, and he hasn't sent a single word!"

But you must know, my friends, that I did not mean to disappoint you; the reason why I have not written so far is by no means pure laziness, though laziness has its share everywhere.Of course, it's not because there is nothing to say; God forbid!After so many happy days, I still come to complain about the ordinary life.There are a lot of words, and there are more than just words. The difficulty lies in the accumulation of words in this stomach, and where to start.This is one layer; there is another difficulty, which seems to me more hesitating, how should this statement be said?If I were a frivolous newspaper reporter, and his only gold standard was to record what he heard, that would be easy, as long as you clean your ears every day, don’t forget to take them with you when you go out, easily prevent him from falling asleep, and at the same time Holding the chronicle book, holding the "forever tip" in one hand, handing the foreign news to the ear, the ear to the hand, the hand to the pen, and the pen to the paper, isn't that the end of the story?It's a pity that I don't have the talent for interviewing, my ears are not long enough, my hands are not fast enough, I am too stupid, my thoughts come very slowly, and the few words I ask for are also tempered. You can only join them. If I have the skill of a painter, I can open the book and describe the life when I see the scenery is good, or the characters here are beautiful. There are ways to leave traces of erratic news, and I am not afraid that there will be no ready-made articles to do.

I think you will take the time to read my newsletter, and you won't be looking forward to any news about the current situation.Mossolini’s speech, General Hindenburg’s appointment as president, France’s change of cabinet, etc., have been handled by your special correspondents in Europe. I don’t have enough paper in this notebook to forgive me.You don't have to expect anything out of the ordinary, because I can tell you privately that I didn't want to get rich or die when I came back to Europe, and I didn't want my legs to be crushed by a car or my wallet to make Mr. Scissors proud .No, I won’t get any surprises. Originally, I am an ordinary tourist, and Europe in my eyes is only a few ordinary cities; if I have something to say, it is only in this ordinary experience. A few prosaic words within the bounds of , and nothing else.

It's just that because everything is so ordinary, I feel particularly embarrassed when I write here.If I have the opportunity to see a bullfight, a big ox in red and a knight in red fight desperately, and tens of thousands of spectators clap their hands and applaud, if I write an article about "Bullfighting", then Not only the people you read are suitable, but the people I write are also easy.But I can’t watch bullfights (I heard that Spain bans them); not to mention bullfights, human fights are rare, this world is clearly a peaceful world, you can see it when you transfer from an inn in one country to an inn in another country It's nothing more than the smiling faces of the servants and the smiling "servants", as long as you have a small amount of money, you will see the smiling faces all the way.Of course, this stereotyped smiling face won't motivate you to make a fuss.As for the Italian, he is famous for his bad temper and easy to scold each other, but he is obviously more self-restraining; you have read the wonderful article in WD Howells' Venetian Life about the quarrel between two Jiangduo wax boatmen, and you must think that you must come to this place Sooner or later, brightly colored cursing can be heard; but no, I have been here for more than a month and I have never seen a single instance of violent southerners.In short, everything in the past two months seems to have been discussed in private, don't let me hear or encounter some unusual movements!At the same time, my commitment to correspond is not exempted or lessened; every day my hateful conscience lifts my elbow and says: "Hey, hurry up, people are waiting for you!"

I don't know how to write ordinary travel notes, and I don't need to write them. This familiar Europe is not the tip of the Arctic Ocean or the center of the African desert. Who wants you to babble.I'm a bit reluctant to use the diary to make it public. It seems a little inappropriate to ask the ghost of Lihun during the day to appear in front of everyone, and to be honest, there are not many records in the diary recently.How about writing it as a personal letter?That is also a way of writing, but you always have an acquainted recipient in mind, which is difficult, because if you think about your closest friend, he or she, you run the risk of being too wordy, and at the same time If the friend you assume is too estranged, you will be restrained in your writing, which is equally unflattering.Ah!Friends, your disappointment is certain.When I started just now, it seemed that I always had a few words to say to you, but you can see that I have been awkward in my pen for a long time, but there is still no result.I don't know what should be said, and I don't know how should should be said!So I had to be obscene, I had to find ways to prevaricate, and I would write on paper whatever came to my pen, in my choice, style, and decency!

[-]. Leaving Beijing

(End of this chapter)