Eloquence Psychological Manipulation: Improving Language Ability and Improving the Quality of Life

Chapter 2 Psychological manipulation of speech: the intimate relationship between language and psychology (1)
The relationship between language and psychology is subtle and complicated. People's voices can be expressed through language, and can also be covered up with the help of language.As for which sentence is true and which sentence is false, the personality and intention of the speaker, we all need to make a correct judgment.These seem to be difficult, but they are not completely out of order. We can judge a person's personality and hidden psychological mystery through voice, content, body language, speech speed and tone, spoken language, etc.

1. Speaking voice reflects personality

Words are the voice of the heart, and the voice is like the person. Language and psychology have an intimate relationship, and voice is the externalization of this relationship.How a person's personality is can be reflected by his voice.If you don't believe me, you can carefully study your own vocal habits or the voices of your family members and friends to see if you can confirm the wonderful law of "sound like a person".

1. People who speak quickly and quickly are usually impatient, generally very enthusiastic, and attach great importance to friendship among friends.Its speed of doing things is directly proportional to the speed of speaking, which belongs to the type of vigorous and resolute.Most of these people don't have a particularly good memory, and they forget troublesome things very quickly. Their emotions come and go quickly, and they are optimists.It is usually easier to get along with this kind of person.

2. People with a calm and gentle voice usually have a depressed personality.They are usually very good at controlling their emotions, and even suppressing their emotions.Such people are usually more assertive, have their own views on people, things, and things, and will not easily accept other people's opinions.They are generally relatively independent, and they are staunch supporters and implementers of the philosophy of "relying on the mountain, relying on everyone, and relying on oneself is the best".So, don't look at their gentleness on the surface, but it is really not an easy task to persuade such people through words.

3. People with a hoarse voice are usually hardliners.Their personalities are generally strong and even stubborn.They have their own unique opinions and tastes, and they will not change easily unless they want to.At the same time, although such people are stubborn and independent, their thinking is very active, and their creativity can always be one step ahead of others.In terms of their attire, they are always eye-catching every time they appear, and they basically belong to the "hipster" category.

4. People who speak in a whiny voice are usually more dependent.They basically belong to the kind of people who "when the sky falls, tall people will go to the top".This kind of people prefer to live in groups, enjoy the lively feeling, and fear loneliness.Although he has a strong dependence and always hopes to get help from others, he is also a social master who can speak well.Therefore, although they are accustomed to relying on others, others are willing to serve them when they hear their whining voices.

The formation of a person's personality is the result of the combined effect of many innate and acquired factors. The voice of speaking gradually becomes clearer with the growth of a person's personality, and it also reflects a person's personality more and more clearly.We can understand a person's personality through a person's voice, and we can also use the voice to express our own personality.Just like every product has a trademark, let the sound become a unique "trademark" to show your personality, and let people think of the person when they hear the sound. This is the successful use of the sound logo.

US President Roosevelt's colloquial phrase is "very happy", this sentence can be said by everyone, many people say it, but it is the most magical when it comes out of Roosevelt's mouth, and that is precisely because of his unique voice.Whenever he uses his unique voice to say this sentence to the American people, it will definitely attract the most excited voice from the people. This is the charm of voice.

The same is true in today's society. To impress others, the voice of personality is also the most beneficial way to convey.For example, Taiwan's No. 1 model Lin Chi-ling, who can stand out in the show business circle full of beauties, uses her whine voice as the main symbol, and whine is her trademark.She just makes you remember, whether you like it or not.Similarly, singers such as Yang Kun and Adu also formed their own characteristics with their hoarse voices, and became popular in the music scene after being sought after by fans.

Although sound is only a medium, the information it conveys is incomparable to other media.Human personality can be reflected through voice, and the voice of personality is also memorable.You can know a person through the sound, and you can also establish your own personality and characteristics through the sound. This is the mysterious relationship between language and psychology.Listen carefully to the voice of everyone around you. Through the voice, you can understand a person and let others know you.This is not only a very interesting thing, but also an art and skill for you to master the psychology of others and show your true personality.

2. The real psychology reflected by body language

Psychologists have found through research that human communication is more carried out through their posture, posture, position and distance from others, rather than face-to-face conversation.To be precise, more than 65% of interpersonal communication is carried out in non-verbal means, that is, through body language.Human body language expression is mostly subconscious and a true reflection of psychology. Although sometimes it may not attract the special attention of everyone, in fact it does convey more information silently than vocal language.In addition, body language has an incomparable advantage over spoken language, that is, higher authenticity. There are quite a few people who say "duplicate what they say", but not many people can do "duplicate what they say".

A person's true thoughts are often not expressed through direct speech, but inadvertent small movements during the conversation can help you discover the clues.Now take a look at how the person sitting opposite you behaves during the conversation, and soon you will know whether he is really "talking about it".

1. Put one hand on your cheek.Many people will use this action when talking, and the signal reflected by this action is that he can't concentrate on listening to your speech. He uses the action of supporting his cheek to control himself, and hopes that the topic can end quickly; or he You want to speak because you've made him impatient with your conversation.People who like to stick their chins when talking tend to be lazy in their thinking, not interested in many things, and don't care about them.So you'd better not bother him with some boring topics.In a conversation, if the person you're talking to raises your cheeks, you'd better be sensible and end the topic quickly, or change to a topic that interests him.

2. The hand keeps touching the chin.This kind of person prefers to think, and often lives in his own world. It is common for a person to fall into a state of meditation.Many times he is not listening to you.If you don't believe me, just ask him what you just said the next time he touches his chin, and he won't be able to answer in all likelihood.Of course, although this kind of person likes to think, the content of his thinking has nothing to do with calculations. He just likes to think wildly, and his personality is usually more sensitive.They are harmless in interpersonal communication, but because of their sensitive personality, when interacting with such people, try to say as little suggestive words as possible to prevent them from random suspicion.

3. Constantly rubbing ears.This kind of person's personality is usually not a quiet type. What he likes is to be a speaker, not an audience.Rubbing his ears conveys that he is subconsciously impatient with your words, and he is trying to control the leakage of his emotions by doing something, but this action just reflects his true psychology.So at this time, you'd better stop and ask the other party's opinion, otherwise it is very likely that he didn't listen to a word of what you said, and your words will be in vain.

4. The thumb rests on the chin, and the other fingers cover the mouth or nose.If you see this gesture in a conversation, the other person's subconscious is probably conveying a point of view that is at odds with yours.He has his own views and opinions, but he just doesn't want to pour cold water on you.He used this action as a subconscious defensive gesture to prevent himself from slipping.Of course, this posture can also be divided into two situations: one is to do it while listening to your speech, and the other is to do it when you are speaking.If the other party makes this action while listening to you, it means that he disagrees with your point of view, and you'd better reserve your point of view at this time; if this action is made when the other party is speaking, it means that he is very likely It's a lie, he tried to use this action to hide his inner unease.

5. Touch your nose with your hands from time to time.This is usually a sign that the speaker is lying.When a person is lying, they will feel uneasy in their subconscious mind. This uneasiness will affect the physiological system of the body. Lying will make the excess blood in the body instantly concentrate on the face, thus causing the spongy structure in the nose to expand a few millimeters.At this time, the liar will feel that the nose is not very comfortable, so he will touch it subconsciously.Therefore, what a person touches the most when lying is his nose. This is not simply because of the psychological hint caused by listening to the fairy tale that telling a lie will make people's nose grow longer.

6. The direction of the line of sight and the direction of the finger are inconsistent.If a person is speaking in a different direction than the direction his eyes are looking at and the direction his fingers are pointing at, it means that he is most likely fabricating the facts at this time.His speech at this time was insincere, which led to uncoordinated physical reactions and an inability to maintain the same pace.If you find yourself in this situation with the person you're talking to, it's best to take the credibility of what he's saying with a grain of salt.

7. Time lag between answering and asking questions.The time difference between the answer and the question reflects a person's thinking time and degree of the question, which is called the reaction latency in psychology.In general, the longer the response latency, the more the respondent concealed the truth.Respondents are stalling for time, making excuses to cover up for themselves.Of course, if the reaction incubation period is too short and the answer is too fast, it means that this speech has been prepared in advance. This kind of speech prepared in advance will be said as soon as the opportunity arises, and it is often complete and detailed. , Can not hear the loophole.On the contrary, if it is true, it usually needs to be corrected in detail.Therefore, looking at the time difference between a person's answer and a question can also judge the authenticity of his language to a certain extent.

8. Touch neck, blink frequently, lick lips.These compulsive actions reflect the speaker's lack of confidence in what he is saying, and speaking without confidence often makes people subconsciously hope to use small movements to cover up this lack of confidence.In the face of such a speaker, on the one hand, we should take a reserved attitude towards the credibility of what he said, and on the other hand, we should give him a relatively relaxed speaking environment, so that the other party can eliminate tension and doubts.

There are many small gestures that reflect the true psychology: one side of the mouth raises to express contempt and contempt; when one inadvertently stretches out the middle finger, it expresses resistance or hostility to the problem; taking a step back or crossing arms means that you have no confidence in your own words, which is a kind of defense and retreat The posture of touching one's hand subconsciously is for self-comfort and reassurance.

The effect of body language to convey information is sometimes stronger than that of vocal language, and it cannot be ignored.Psychologists tell us that body language reflects a person's subconscious, and it is difficult for the person to control himself.Therefore, the small movements that people inadvertently show when speaking will more or less reflect their true psychology.When interacting with people, we must learn to observe the other person's body language.Maybe we can't get a clear picture of their minds through these actions, but at least we can discover their true psychology through these actions, so that we can judge the direction and authenticity of the topic according to the psychological needs of the other party, and grasp the proportion of our own speech.

3. Explore the other party's psychology from spoken language
In life, we often hear some such spoken words, such as "hmm", "hate", "very annoying", "really boring", "yes right" and so on.Spoken language is a way of expressing a certain habit of a person. Some of these spoken words are modest and euphemistic, some are arrogant and subjective, and some are aggressive and anxious. In short, they all have a certain subjective color and personal characteristics.Therefore, it reflects a person's personality and psychological changes to varying degrees.

Spoken language reflects a person's inner view on something, and is a fixed language response mode after psychological processing of external information, which will be blurted out when some similar situations arise.Spoken language is a kind of subconscious psychological expression of people. It not only reflects the emotions and mentality of the user at that time, but also its personality and psychological tendency can be seen from it.The following are some colloquial expressions that people like to use in daily life.

1. People who like to use "should, must, must".Such people are usually very self-confident, and they are usually calm and sensible.They believe in what they say, and they also believe that these words will be recognized by others, and they believe that they can persuade each other.Many people in leadership positions are prone to produce such spoken words, which often reflect their style of doing things and the leading role of their subconscious mind.

2. People who are used to saying "Be honest, tell the truth, I won't lie to you".Such people are often afraid that others will misunderstand themselves, and they often have elements of impatience in their hearts.He is very concerned about other people's evaluation of his speech, and hopes to gain the trust and approval of the listener, so he repeatedly uses "I won't lie to you" to emphasize the authenticity of the events he said.

3. People who often talk about "maybe, maybe, probably".Such people have a very strong sense of self-defense, and they will not reveal their true inner thoughts.They prepared for themselves a retreat with a reserved and leeway tone, and did not make absolute statements, adopting a strategy of attacking and retreating.Such people are generally calm in dealing with others, and their interpersonal relationships are generally good.

4. People who always start their speech with "heard, listened to, said".Such people are generally well-informed, but lack decisiveness. They use words such as "hearing and hearing" to leave room for flexibility in their speeches.This kind of person is generally smooth in life, and always prepares for himself when doing things, but because he is not decisive enough, he often has ambivalence, which affects his judgment.

5. People who always have "um, ah, this, that" in their words.The spoken language of this kind of people is caused by a small vocabulary or slow thinking. They need to reserve enough time for themselves to organize their language through the interspersion and pause of these modal particles.Therefore, people who are accustomed to using these colloquial expressions are either slower to respond or more intelligent.Such people are often afraid of saying the wrong thing, and use such spoken language for intermittent thinking.

6. People who are accustomed to using transition words such as "but, but, but".Most of these people are self-willed, and using these transitional words is often to defend themselves or something, with a posture of self-protection.However, this kind of willfulness is usually relatively mild, and it will appear more tactful, so that people will not feel indifferent because of a categorical veto.Therefore, such rhetoric is often heard in interpersonal communication and public relations.

7. People who often say "depressed".This kind of people may not be really depressed. In most cases, this word is to relieve their own psychological pressure. Modern people have a lot of life pressure and rapid psychological changes. Through this seemingly negative mantra, they can pour out bitter water for themselves and let their psychological pressure be relieved. There is a channel to soothe and let off steam.Therefore, this colloquial phrase can often be spoken from the mouths of busy urban white-collar workers.

8. People who like to say "this game is over, this game is dead".This person is usually a student and can be heard especially after an exam.This is a manifestation of a human psychological defense mechanism.Use this method to make some positive and adaptive changes in the relationship between yourself and reality, making it easier for yourself to accept bad results, and strengthen the bad results verbally before unfortunate things happen, psychologically Reduce the tremendous tension and pain that an injury can cause.

(End of this chapter)