regardless of costs

Chapter 47 Mistake 2
Chapter 40 Mistake 2
It was as if time and space were intertwined, and he returned to the year in a flash.

He remembered that when he first met Qin Zhen, they were only half-grown children. She was much shorter than him, holding a bear doll, and sweetly calling him "Brother Jing Yan", with a crooked smile like the sky. crescent moon.His mother was gloomy, his father was solemn and stern, and even he seldom smiled. At that time, he thought it was the most beautiful smile he had ever seen.He has a cold temper and doesn't have many friends, but this girl is willing to accompany him, no matter how sad or happy, she will always be so happy.

Maybe that kind of smile is his long-standing obsession. Even if they are not together, he still hopes that she will be happy all the time.

But Liu Guang is easy to throw people away. He is not the youthful Jing Yan back then, and she is no longer the pure Qin Zhen. Time has carved a different picture in the years of their separation.

She went abroad, fell in love with another man, got married in a flash, and divorced again.

And Xiaomu walked into his life, and even boldly gave birth to their child when he didn't know it.Only then did he know that there was such a strong woman in the world who could love him silently in a more moving way, regardless of everything, even without asking for anything in return.

Unknowingly caring about her and falling in love with her has gradually become an instinct, and the past has long been insignificant.As for Qin Zhen, he just wanted to try his best to give her a hand because of his old relationship, because he didn't want to see her have a bad life after all.

His overly cold eyes made Qin Zhen feel embarrassed. She lowered her eyes and asked, "Brother Jing Yan...then if...if I hadn't left back then, would the result have been different?"

Jing Yan pursed his lips, his expression became a little gentle, and he said slowly: "Zhenzhen, you and I both know that such a hypothetical question can't change the result, so why ask again? Zhenzhen, maybe your favorite It’s still yourself, look, before you make every choice, you always consider whether you can accept it before you consider other people’s feelings. Doing so will make you lose a lot, and you have to learn to be responsible for your own choices That's right."

He patted her on the shoulder reassuringly, turned and left the suite. He was taken aback as soon as he opened the door. Fang Minzhi stood at the door at some point, worried and worried: "Zhenzhen... is she okay? Yes Didn't I trouble you again?"

Jing Yan pursed her thin lips tightly, her eyes fell on her, and her tone was calm: "Zhenzhen is no longer a child, and you blindly tolerate her will only make her live in the past and become more self-willed, how can this be so? Get better?"

Fang Min was speechless: "I see, uh, your father is in the next room, do you want to meet?"

"That's not necessary." Jing Yan flatly rejected her.

It wasn't until Jing Yan left that Fang Minzhi recovered from his trance, turned the doorknob, and by the light could see that Zhenzhen was still sitting on the carpet in embarrassment, with tears on her face that made her heartache. Grab it hard.Because the child had no father since she was a child, so she was both a father and a mother and loved her to the core, which made her too self-tempered, unable to withstand any setbacks and dissatisfaction.

Fang Minzhi smiled strongly, walked over quickly and pulled his daughter up: "Silly girl, why are you sitting on the floor, get up quickly."

"Mom, mom..." Qin Zhen didn't seem to find support until he pulled his mother's arm, crying like tears, "Mom, am I really wrong, now even Brother Jingyan doesn't want me anymore , what do you think I should do..."

"Don't be afraid, hasn't Mom been with you all the time?" Fang Minzhi hugged his daughter, patted her on the back lightly, and sighed, "Zhenzhen, listen to Mom, let's go back to America."

Qin Zhen trembled, bit his lips tightly and did not immediately agree.

Thinking of Jing Yan's tense and gentle look when he answered the phone, she was really unwilling. It was that woman who took away her only support. She gave up her pride and dignity but got nothing. Just gave birth to a son?Why did she get the happiness that should belong to her?Well, she will leave as they wish, but not now.

The night is getting darker and darker, and the black velvet spread out encompasses the whole world, and the stars are like diamonds dotted on it, shining brightly.

It was close to midnight when Jing Yan returned home, and found that Su Xiaomu was still awake, sitting quietly on the sofa in the room, as if waiting for him.

He put down his coat and sat down beside her, smiling slightly warmly: "Why are you staying up so late?" He subconsciously stretched out his hand to hug her, but she quickly dodged it. He stopped suddenly in mid-air, and he could clearly see her quiet face through the gap between his fingers. He gradually closed his fingers, pursed his lips and waited for her to speak restrainedly.

Su Xiaomu tried her best to suppress the wave of calmness, pushed a document on the coffee table to him, and said in a low voice: "If you read it and think it's okay, sign it." She waited and thought all night, this moment It finally arrived, and it was not as difficult to speak as imagined.

Jing Yan's eyes turned to the cold document, he didn't look at her, and he didn't speak, even the orange light falling on his body couldn't melt away the condensed coldness at that moment.Su Xiaomu was a little nervous, and her heartbeat missed a few beats. She could smell the tobacco smell on his body at a distance of not too far or too close. Already a retreating heart has arisen.

She felt uncomfortable, and she hated seeing his lonely silhouette the most, as if he was the only one left in the world.And she also hates, hates that her heart is too soft, she has been hurt countless times, but she can lose her bottom line because of one expression, one action or even one sentence of his.In fact, even she herself didn't know, what kind of magic power did he have that allowed her to give birth to a child for him recklessly, and she couldn't forget it for ten years?

Too persistent, hope is often empty.

She made that choice back then and never regretted it, and now that she makes such a decision, she won't give herself a chance to regret it.

After a long time, when Su Xiaomu couldn't open his mouth, he asked slowly: "What is this?" In fact, he already knew what this document meant, but he just wanted to ask again. Ask her again in front of her face.

Su Xiaomu answered indifferently: "I have signed the divorce agreement. Xiaoyao's custody belongs to you. I reserve the right to visit. Do you have any other problems?"

Jing Yan's expression became more and more condensed. He held the thin pieces of paper, calmly, and said word by word: "Zhenzhen, she will leave soon, just wait..."

When I have nothing to worry about, at that time, I will protect you, just for you.

It's a pity that he hasn't finished his words yet, and Su Xiaomu can't listen anymore, because in her opinion, he still thinks that Qin Zhen is the most important, no matter what he considers, he always puts her first, why does she wait for her to leave, and always waits for her that person?Now that he has lowered her feelings to the dust, there is no need for her to insist anymore.

"But I don't want to wait." Su Xiaomu held back her tears and said mockingly, "Jing Yan, I'm tired of waiting, I can't wait anymore, I've been waiting for so many years, waiting for you to turn around, waiting for you to laugh, waiting for you You see my kindness, waiting for you to love me, in the end it seems like you got everything, but you get nothing, every time I face you I am always cautious, I feel that these happiness are bubbles, and the wind blows and disperses."

She paused, and said sadly: "Actually, Qin Zhen's appearance is just a touchstone between you and me. I really understand you. If we are in a different place, I will be nervous if something happens to Ziqi. Besides You have been friends for so many years, and if you can’t let go, it means that you are not a fickle person, but I just can’t believe it, or I don’t have the conditions to make me believe that I am more important than her in your heart. I don’t have that kind of confidence. After all It’s because the foundation of our relationship is shallow, in fact, it’s okay if it’s shallow, so we won’t feel too uncomfortable when we separate.” But God knows, she said so in her mouth, but she felt very uncomfortable in her heart, so uncomfortable that she was about to die.

Jing Yan's heart was stung. There were many, many words, many, many emotions, which could not be explained by his poor words and clumsy expression.He turned sideways and looked at her carefully, so focused and so deep.

Once he lived alone for so many years, only to find out that there was someone else who had loved him for so many years.She gave him a complete family, and every day when he came back, he would leave a light and a warm greeting.When she laughs, he subconsciously laughs, and when she cries, he will be unhappy.She has a cold body and can't sleep well at night. She likes to hug him tightly when she sleeps.She always said that she needed him, but she didn't know that the one who really needed him was him.Now, she said to herself, she wanted to take back her love for him and warm all of this bit by bit.

How could he allow it?
"Didn't you say you want to give Xiaoyao a complete family?" He spoke in a deep voice, clasped his hands, and his eyes were as deep as the sea in the dark night.

"I said so, but..." Su Xiaomu closed her eyes, "I dare not say that I am the best and most outstanding mother, but I have tried my best to give Xiaoyao the best, and now I It's time to think about it for yourself, he is so sensible, he will understand me in the future."

Jing Yan glanced at the agreement again, and his handsome eyebrows turned to stare at her: "What about me? You can no longer reconsider this decision for me."

Su Xiaomu shook her head: "It is because of serious consideration that I feel that separation is good for you and me."

"But if I don't agree to divorce, this marriage will never be divorced." He said firmly, "Xiaomu, did you hear me clearly? I will not agree to divorce." His tone was unprecedentedly firm.

The deep emotion in those eyes shook Su Xiaomu. For a moment, she suspected that she was really wrong. Maybe if she really gave him time and waited for him again, she would get what she really wanted.

But she was extremely sober, shrugging her shoulders and said calmly: "It doesn't matter, you don't feel the difference, and in short, we will live our own lives in the future, and have nothing to do with each other."

Marriage is just a piece of paper, and divorce is just a formality. Now she is just correcting a wrong relationship. As for the future, she can do whatever she wants, she has already seen it.

(End of this chapter)