If You Give Me Three Days of Light: The Best Collection of Helen Keller

Chapter 21 The Second Half of My Life (Continued) (6)
As soon as I stood in front of the camera, I felt uncomfortable, but the director asked me to laugh all at once, and at the same time asked me to frown and ponder. How could my emotions turn so quickly?Therefore, sometimes after listening to the instructions at first, there is only a daze.At the beginning, everyone didn't enter the role, so there were many places that were not ideal.Fortunately, the woman who played my girlhood was very competent. Of course she is neither deaf nor dumb, but she can play this role perfectly.For this reason I developed a great liking for her; and she also liked me for playing me.The other actress who played my college self was beautiful and had a particularly charming smile.At first, the actress closed her eyes to act invisible, but she would open her eyes a little carelessly, which caused the staff on the sidelines to laugh. Her expression at this time was so funny.But the actress is happy to play the role, and she's not bad at acting, especially in the dreaming of the Greek gods scene, which is my favorite.

Next, I will introduce those friends who have important influences in my life.The problem is, those kind friends who helped me a lot, such as Mr. Henry Johnmond, Mr. Mark Twain, and Archbishop Brooks, have all passed away, and those who are still alive are also very old. Of course it is not the same.

At that time, I wrote to Dr. Bell, who responded promptly.He said: "Reading your letter reminds me of that young lady in Washington. In my eyes, you have always been that girl. As long as you want, I can do anything for you. But now I I'm in a foreign country, and I won't be able to return to the United States for a while. But you must not forget me! Remember when we first met, I was not a 71-year-old old man, and I didn't even have a single white hair on my head , how about you? I was only 7 years old at the time. If I really want to make a realistic movie, I think someone else must play me. Please find a handsome young man without white hair to play me. When the filming is over, we will use the current It’s time to make your debut. I think it must be interesting to compare the before and after like this?”

After reading the letter, I suddenly came up with a good idea: "Why not arrange a symbolic scene to introduce my friend? This way the effect may be better. For example, you can arrange for me to be surrounded by acacias on both sides." Walking on the road, I accidentally met Dr. Bell and Mr. Zhuang Mengde, we chatted and walked while enjoying the beautiful scenery of the lake and mountains, which seemed more natural." The shade of the acacia tree is the most suitable for me, who is blind and deaf Yes, the more I think about it, the more I think this is a good idea.

It's a pity that the film company did not adopt my suggestion, but arranged a big party scene, so that all the people who had assisted me appeared at the banquet together, including those friends who had passed away.Among them is my most missed father who has been dead for 20 years. —all at the banquet.Of course, Bishop Brooks, Dr. Holmes, Dr. Henry Jonmond, etc. all have their own "substitutes".What pleased me the most was that I met Mr. Joseph, who I hadn't seen for nearly 20 years, and he was even more lively and happy than when I first met him.

To be on such an occasion, together with such familiar and dear friends, makes me feel that I have been in heaven without knowing it.However, when I shake hands with them, I feel that although their hands are very warm, their tone and demeanor are completely different from my friends; The astonishment of being awakened from the dream.

At the end of the banquet, I have a line: "At present, there are about 8 blind people in the country who are in a miserable situation. They are helpless, and our society has no perfect system to help them at present. . . . How many people have died with hatred when they never knew the joy of being alive! ... Therefore, we should resolve to seek a better life for these people, and make this world a happier and happier place."

Just after most of the film was shot, everyone suddenly found that it lacked a climax, in other words, there was no drama.So some people said: "Helen has never had a romantic history in her life, and of course she didn't have a great lover. Her life is too ordinary!" Some people suggested: "Or how about creating a lover for her and let them stage a love scene?" If the current movies do not have these episodes, they are destined to be unpopular." But the director disagreed with these views from the beginning, and he believed that this was just superfluous and self-defeating.After much deliberation, it was finally decided to insert a few dramatic scenes.

Among the several scenes added, there is a scene in front of a cave named "Time", where a pale lady who represents "knowledge" interacts with a burly man who represents "ignorance", and the result is " Knowledge" won and picked up the young Helen.

Another occasion was when teacher Sullivan tried various methods but young Helen still could not understand. Help the young soul to come to me, and don't give up on her." So Teacher Sullivan mustered up her courage again.

However, there are still many scenes that are a bit far-fetched.For example, a sad mother held a torch and pleaded for the lives of the unfortunate disabled; another example, the leaders of the four great powers gathered in France to decide the fate of human beings all over the world. At this time, Helen appeared and begged them not to start a war .In the end they also felt that the scene was too far-fetched, so they ended up cutting it.

As a result of all the whims the film throws into the mix, the plot gets more and more outrageous and unreal.Especially the ending scene, which I think is ridiculous now because it was so fantastical.They asked me to dress up as a Messenger of Peace, ride a white horse like Joan of Arc, and be at the head of the procession.Unexpectedly, the white horse found on the set is very lively, and the momentum of running is amazing.At that time, I was holding the horn with one hand and controlling the reins with the other. I almost fell off the horse several times, so I became more and more nervous, my heart was fluctuating, and my whole body was sweating.The sun above the head was shining down mercilessly again, the sweat on the forehead was dripping down like a faucet turned on, and even the trumpet on the lip was full of sweat, and the blowing was salty.After I rode for a while in fear, the horse under my crotch suddenly stood up without any order or warning, and I was terrified.Fortunately, a photojournalist next to him had a sharp eye, and he rushed up to the horse and grabbed it, so I didn't fall into a big tumble.

Although the performance experience was very exciting, the box office revenue of the final movie was not very good.I returned from splendor to tranquility, and then returned to Forrest's residence, and lived a peaceful life for two years.

career in vaudeville theater
Our economy has been very tight, so I also use my brain to find ways to increase income and reduce expenditure.The money given by my friends is limited to my lifetime. I have to consider saving a pension for Teacher Sullivan. If she passes away before me, what will happen to her in her later years?
It was with this in mind that we decided to make guest appearances at the Vaudeville Theater at the Porto Building, which ended in nearly four years, from 4 until the spring of 1920.Of course, we didn't go on the show continuously during those 1924 years.When we first started, we were only doing occasional tours in New York, New England or Canada. From 4 to 1921, we began to perform all over the United States.When the news of our performance in the Variety Theater got out, some moralists criticized: "You see, Helen is a man who will do anything to become famous."

Some enthusiastic people wrote to advise me not to join the showbiz.In fact, how could I be tempted by the name?I have my own plan, but I just implement it according to my own will. Even Teacher Sullivan was persuaded to do so by me many times.In my opinion, compared with writing, this job is not only much easier, but the income is relatively higher.Such performances are called touring, but they often stay in one place for more than a week.Unlike our speeches in the past, sometimes we have to go to several places in a day, so we are exhausted from traveling.And when giving a speech, often every time I go to a place, I have to go on stage immediately, and there is almost no time to take a breath.

The performances in the Variety Theater are only one in the afternoon and one in the evening, and each performance is only 20 minutes.Theaters have their own set of management rules, which are quite standardized, and life is normal.Here, we have complete personal freedom and don't have to worry about being disturbed by the audience, and it is rare for the audience to ask for a handshake like a lecture.

Doing this job makes me feel happy physically and mentally.However, Teacher Sullivan didn't seem to be as calm as I was. She felt awkward from the very beginning.It's no wonder, because our names are always on the program with the stuntmen, animal trainers, monkeys, elephants, parrots, etc., so whoever feels uncomfortable.But I feel that there is nothing vulgar in my performance, and of course there is nothing ulterior, so I feel very calm in my heart.

The people I met in this circle interested me more than anyone I had met on any occasion before.Most of them are bold and forthright, warm and loyal, and their actions often move me very much.All in all, my time at the Variety Theater was indeed a happy one.The audience was cordial and enthusiastic, and they all expressed genuine admiration when they heard me speak.Usually, Teacher Sullivan will explain the way of educating me, and then I will give a brief self-introduction.In the end it was up to me to answer questions from the audience.

The most frequently asked questions from viewers are:

"Your eyes can't see, do you believe in ghosts?"

"What do you see in your dream?"

"How do you tell day from night when you can't see a clock?"

"Are you going to marry?"'

There are so many questions, and some of them are very funny!
I have always cared about listening to the audience's reaction to me. What is rare is that the audience here are all honest and enthusiastic. When they think my words make sense or make them happy, they clap their hands and laugh without shame. She doesn't hide her feelings at all.Therefore, I always give them the most sincere answers easily and happily.Talking about the audience's reaction reminds me of the opposite extreme.That was a speech at church.Of course, the level of the audience in the church is different from the audience in the vaudeville theater, and their mentality is also very different, but their extremely solemn attitude made me feel at a loss.Although I couldn't see or hear them, and didn't know their expressions, I could feel that they didn't respond to my words, and the audience was completely silent; and the podium was very high, so I mistakenly imagined that it was only me. A man is talking to himself.

When I went to the radio station to give a speech, it was the same situation. No one moved around, there was no sound, and of course there was no applause, and there was no smell of cigarettes and hairspray in the air that I was used to. I seemed to be in a world without people. inside.So, I'd rather mingle with the audience in a vaudeville theater because at least I don't feel too lonely or confined.

my loving mother
The saddest moment in my life was when I heard the news of my mother's death before a performance.We were playing somewhere in Los Angeles at the time.I was 14 when my father died, and I didn't know much about the grief of death, so I didn't feel as sad as this time.Of course, it may be because I have spent more time with my mother, have a deeper relationship, and have more difficult feelings.

For me, before Teacher Sullivan came, my memory of my mother was blank. I only know that my mother often said later: "When you were born, I felt both proud and happy."

My mother’s words must be true, because she remembers all the big and small things in the 19 months before my illness very clearly, and often told me like a few treasures: “After you learn to walk, you like to go to the yard to chase the flowers among the flowers. Butterfly and guts
Bigger than a boy, he is not afraid of animals like chickens and dogs at all, and often hugs them with his chubby little hands.

At that time, your eyes were better than anyone else, and you could quickly find the needles and buttons that are not easily seen by ordinary people, so you became my little helper sewing buttons..."

No matter how many times my mother said these things, she didn't feel bored.She also said that once my family was weaving a three-legged bamboo cage, and there were many small holes around the bamboo cage.As I was babbling, I was curious and excited, and I would often climb onto my mother's lap and ask in a non-fluent baby talk: "How long will it take to finish?"

My mother also said that I like the blazing sparks in the fireplace the most, and I often refuse to go to bed, staring at the flames on the burning wood in a daze.It is especially exciting when you see the flames coming out of the chimney.

"Oh, how happy were we two at that time?" After recalling the memory, the mother would always draw this conclusion with a sigh of satisfaction.

When I unfortunately contracted a serious illness and became blind and deaf, my mother was only 23 years old, and she lived in pain and darkness ever since.Being reserved and cautious by nature, my mother had few friends.After this misfortune, her mood was of course even more melancholy and lonely.When I grew up, I always tried to learn to be independent, and I didn't want my mother to worry about me.Every time my mother and I go out on a trip, or come to Lianshan to accompany me, she may feel relieved; however, more often she will worry about my disabled daughter, and even cry in secret!In the last few years, I seem to vaguely feel that my mother has become more and more silent.

My mother once said that when she woke up early in the morning, the first thought that popped into her mind was Helen's problem, and she often worried about it before going to bed at night.My mother's arthritic hands made it difficult to write letters, but for me, she often wrote to me in Braille with great difficulty.

After me, my mother gave birth to a younger sister, and five years later a younger brother, Phillips, and the birth of both of them brought some comfort to her.After his father passed away, his mother took on the responsibility of raising his younger siblings independently, and her life was very difficult.The younger sister finally grew up and married Mr. Quincy in Alabama, and the mother was relieved.She would visit her children at her sister's house or at my place in turn.To be honest, when I was young, my mother was not very interested in female celebrities and housework, but after she got married, she had to shoulder half of the burden in the family.Not only do you have to supervise the work of the workers, but you also have to help grow vegetables and feed livestock, and you have to cook all kinds of food yourself, such as ham, bacon, etc., and you have to cut the children's clothes by yourself. some of the guests.Anyway, the mother has to do all the complicated housework that belongs to southern families.

The ham and pickled cucumbers made by my mother are famous far and wide. Anyone who has eaten them will praise them, and people in the neighborhood will often ask my mother for some to take home.At that time, I was still young, so I didn't know about my mother's busyness and hard work. I always pulled her skirt and followed her every step of the way, but my mother never got bored, but endured all this silently.How can a mother, a weak woman with keen senses and fragile nerves, be able to bear so many trivial and heavy housework?Teacher Sullivan often expresses her inconceivability and praises her mother.What's even more convincing is that we never heard a single complaint from our mother. She was always doing it silently. It seemed that besides work, it was still work, as long as she kept doing it.

My mother is also an excellent gardener who likes flowers. She not only knows how to plant seedlings and sow seeds, but also knows how to plant flowers and trees.Although the work of watering and weeding is tiring, she is very happy to do it and does not feel tired at all.Mother's extreme fascination with flowers and plants certainly made her elegant and meticulous.I remember that in the early spring of one year, my mother transplanted a rose flower, but I didn’t expect a cold snap a few days later, and the newly transplanted rose flower was frozen to death. In a letter to me, my mother said very sadly: “I Just like King David who lost his son, he couldn't help crying bitterly."

Birds are also deeply loved by mothers.Every time she comes to Lianshan, she always likes to go for a walk in the nearby forest, and she also brings some food with her to feed the birds.She is especially interested when she sees the mother bird teaching her chicks to fly, sometimes for hours without realizing it.

My mother is also very interested in current affairs and political issues, and often reads books and newspapers.She hated hypocrisy and stupidity—of course those in the political arena, often sarcastically criticizing shady MPs and politicians.Mother admired above all the sharp-witted political commentators, one of whom was Mrs Thomas Carlyle, with whom she had corresponded.Among the writers, my mother preferred Whitman, Balzac, etc., whose works my mother would read again and again, and could almost memorize them.

One summer, we went to the mountain cabin on the shore of Pamont Lake, where we loved the emerald green lake, trees and quiet trails.One evening, we were sitting on a stone chair by the lake, and my mother looked at the young people playing in canoes on the lake. Suddenly, I felt something in my heart. I couldn't understand the inexplicable low tide at that time.

(End of this chapter)