Love Apartment 4
Chapter 9
Chapter 9
1
Soon, Nolan went to the United States.Now that they have decided to be together, Zeng Xiaoxian's good man qualities are naturally displayed to the fullest. In addition to video chatting at a fixed time every day, he also came up with various tricks to increase each other's presence.For example, give Nuo Lan a male model's prosthetic hand, and then prepare a female model's prosthetic hand for herself, hold that hand when she misses it, and pretend that the other party is by her side.The intention is good, but the implementation is a bit wretched, and it hurts a group of roommates, and anyone who sees it will get goosebumps all over.
And Nuo Lan, of course, cooperated in every possible way with Zeng Xiaoxian's actions, despite being separated by mountains and rivers, she was still full of tenderness and held his heart firmly.But no matter what, since he already knew what Yifei was thinking, he was still a little uneasy about keeping her and Zeng Xiaoxian together day and night.It happened that one of her classmates opened a dating website for high-end people, and Nuo Lan passed Yifei's information to it, and as a result, everyone responded.Yifei, who receives a lot of application letters every day, is naturally in a good mood, or it is for An Nuolan's heart, pretending to be in a good mood, it is unknown.In life, the most important thing is of course the future, maybe there is a suitable person waiting for her?
As soon as he heard that Nuo Lan had introduced Yifei to a blind date, Zeng Xiaoxian immediately exploded: "Blind... kiss? How can you date if you have nothing to do? There are too many scammers on the Internet! Are you reliable, and..."
Yifei interrupted him, and asked casually: "By the way, the Weiwei that Zhang Wei has a crush on is also a lawyer after a long time, and he is also his competitor, do you know?"
Zeng Xiaoxian was stunned: "I know, but this has something to do with me?"
Immediately afterwards, Yifei yelled at him angrily: "Then Nuolan's helping me on a blind date has something to do with you!"
In the past, Zeng Xiaoxian might still have some right to speak, but if he says such things now, what is his position?Now that I have Nuolan, should I let Yifei continue to wait for him alone?The reason is that, the hurdle in my heart is still difficult to pass, so I am depressed.Meijia wanted to go over to have a chat with Nuo Lan, but he blasted her away angrily.
Why don't you just fall in love, pretend to be nasty every day, and get nervous, am I in your way?The more Mika thought about it, the more unhappy she became.Walking to the next door, I saw Guan Gu and Youyou were counting the plush toys that filled the room, as if they had robbed the entire toy store.Upon questioning, it turned out that Guan Gu accompanied Youyou to buy crayfish, and seeing a machine in the next door shop that uses large pliers to catch dolls, the two of them tried it out.Unexpectedly, Guan Gu played too much in Japan when he was a child. He had a lot of research on this claw machine or fishing claw machine. He passed on the tricks to Yoyo, and then gave him a little guidance. The dolls in the whole machine were moved back home.
"It's you who taught me well." "No, it's because you're smart." "No, it's because you are patient." "No, I'm sure you won't be able to catch it with someone else." "Well...you have a sweet mouth." The two of them spoke nakedly. Showing affection, Qingqing me, Meijia looked even more upset, why are people all over the world falling in love? !Zeng Xiaoxian was flying a kite by Nuo Lan, Yifei was busy picking a high-quality man, Zhang Wei was fighting a lawsuit against his crush, and Lu Ziqiao was always galloping, as if Meijia was the only one left in the love apartment.
With nowhere to go and no one to accompany, Meijia leaned on the bookshelf reading comics boredly, and fell asleep without knowing it.
Suddenly, the surrounding area was smoky, and there was a doll fishing machine in the room. Guan Gu stood behind her and taught her how to catch dolls.Every time he catches one, Guan Gu will look at her with a smile, and praise him: "I'm sorry! This one is hard to catch."
Meijia shyly said: "Guan Gu-jun, if you hadn't taught me personally, I would definitely not be able to do it."
Guan Gu stared into her eyes and said seriously: "No, you are smart."
"No, it's your patience."
"No! You won't be able to catch someone else."
"I'd like to change the name. Let's call it—Death Pliers Claw Claw, how about it?"
"Why didn't I think of that? You're such a little genius."
"Guan Gu-jun, your mouth is so sweet."
The two talked to each other, and gradually approached, so close that they could clearly hear each other's heartbeat.Meijia closed her eyes and went to meet her, feeling that Guan Gu's breath was going to surround her. "Wait, it seems that someone is watching us?" Mika suddenly felt that something was wrong, Guan Gu comforted her by saying that there was no one.There was only a plate on the table with a live crayfish in it, watching the two tenderly kiss each other with open teeth and claws...
Meijia laughed out loud in her dream, rolled off the sofa drooling, and fell awake.It happened that Zhang Wei came in from the outside with a bag on his back and a law book and a notebook in his hand. When he saw it, he hurried over to help Mijia up, and asked her funnyly what she had just dreamed about and was so happy.
"I dreamed of Guan..." Mijia got up in a daze, yawned, and was about to say the word "Guan Gu", when she remembered the beauty in her dream, she blushed and quickly changed her words, "What does it matter to you?" ?”
Originally just asking casually, meddling in other's affairs, and simply saying a word, Meijia blushed immediately, Zhang Wei felt strange.What's even more strange is that when asked why she was blushing, Meijia was even more flustered, pouted, her face was as red as a high fever of 42 degrees, and she spoke incoherently: "You are sick, old lady, I...you can blush if you like...it's okay What to see..."
It may be because of the many lawsuits recently, Zhang Wei's reasoning ability is very improved, and he can smell the ambiguous smell with his feet. It must be that Meijia had a very unusual dream.Such gossip, how can we not tell each other.So, he immediately went to Yifei and Zeng Xiaoxian to share his experience.
"Meijia's blush is not the bright red of watermelon, nor the tender red of apple, nor the Sudan red of grilled chicken wings, but a very rippling... rippling red. So, according to my careful analysis, Meijia does It's a spring dream! ——and the object of her dream is likely to be someone we know." Zhang Wei said clearly.
Yifei interrupted him angrily: "Use your literacy in the lawsuit with Weiwei, Mrs. Xianglin! A crush on the goddess has become a competitor, and you and I have become a life and death, but you still have the mind to care about it." Other people's business. You can't guess what a girl is thinking!"
"It's not difficult, I've found the pattern." Seeing that the two people who had always been gossips were indifferent, Zhang Wei was a little surprised.
Yifei curled her lips: "Let's play. Why are you men so self-righteous, and when you really want to show some skills, you all wilt?"
The mood is so wrong, is the blind date not going well?Yifei's information is posted on the homepage, and there are only dozens of applicants who are tall, handsome and rich, and they are too busy!The point is, rich people are not necessarily creative, even the way of dating is the same - eat, drink;
Zhang Wei chuckled: "That's not very good, the food and beverages are all saved."
Yifei asked him: "Aren't you good at reasoning? Guess who I want to date?"
When Zeng Xiaoxian heard that Yifei's date was not going well, he was secretly happy, and a little more joking: "Don't make things difficult for Zhang Wei, he can only reason about girls' minds. You are different."
Yifei turned her head to look at him with a smile, but with a little force on her hand, she twisted a spoon out of its original shape.Seeing that the situation was not right, Zhang Wei and Zeng Xiaoxian both ran away.
2
Recently, the comic industry is not doing well. Guan Gu’s "Love Three-legged Cat" has been suspended by the magazine. The reason is ridiculous. It is said that in order to coincide with the release of "Avengers 2", the boss decided to temporarily insert a few issues of American hero comics. , said to be more appropriate. (Note: several issues = 200 issues)
If it was in the past, when one person was full and the whole family was not hungry, Guan Gu would certainly not worry.But now that he is getting married, he has to be responsible not only for himself, but also for Yoyo and their future. He has to face the reality and live a down-to-earth life.Continue to create, or get married and raise a family?Between dreams and reality, it seems that there is only one to choose.The income from drawing comics became more and more unstable, Guan Gu had no choice but to consider changing jobs.
Yoyo feels sorry for him, and can't bear to let him give up his comic business, but life must have a certain material foundation, daily necessities are very real economic problems.After discussing and discussing, it was decided to let Guan Gu find a part-time job first, so as not to delay the creation, but also to have income, killing two birds with one stone!As for what to do, the two found senior brother Du Jun, thinking that he would come up with a good idea after traveling all over the world and being well-informed.
It hasn't been a day or two since the manga industry has been in recession. The reason why the elder brother is able to be proud of the Jianghu and keep the sound of the waves is because of... his unparalleled professional strength and his unique status in the Jianghu?
"It's all because of me holding 18 part-time jobs at the same time... Otherwise, I would have starved to death." Du Jun said a word, and Guan Gu and Youyou were fooled, 18?Dare to love comics is a part-time job!
The part-time little prince, who can bear what others can't bear, behave what others can't do, and persevere, is a great weapon.
Part-time job [-]: Sit in an empty house that has just been renovated, take a deep breath, use the self-purification function of the human body, absorb as much formaldehyde gas as possible, and let customers move in as soon as possible. People call it a formaldehyde purifier.Although the difficulty of the job is low, there is no requirement for academic qualifications, height and appearance, and one hour of work a day, the income is not bad, but the injury index is too high, which is slightly equal to self-harm.
Part-time job [-]: get people's money, and get rid of disasters with people.It's not about gangsters killing people and getting more goods. The big brother's customers are not ordinary people, but Taobao sellers. His job is to ensure the positive ratings of customers and help him eliminate bad reviews.It doesn’t matter whether you have the wrong version, poor quality, wrong size, too slow delivery, or your mother is in a bad mood today. As soon as the bad review eliminators go out, put your face in the cabinet, hang your soul on the tree, cry poor, pretend to be pitiful, Hugging thighs, stalking, hard-working, no bottom line, no morals, no bad reviews that cannot be changed, and no crown that cannot be rushed.
……
The part-time job recommended by the big brother either ruins the body or sells the soul, which is really unreliable.In desperation, Guan Gu and Yoyo had to find everyone to discuss, hesitatingly and eagerly expressing that when dreams come true, they need to be down-to-earth.It would be great if you can find a suitable part-time job, not only to meet the expenses, but also to live up to the grace of love.
Everyone said in unison: "Speak human words!" Only then did Guan Gu and Youyou have to admit that they were poor recently, so they wanted to find a part-time job to support their family.
Everyone was trying to come up with ideas, only Meijia was distracted, Zeng Xiaoxian saw that she had a strange expression, and shouted a few times before she heard it, she was stunned for a long time, and suddenly became very enthusiastic "Hi".Zhang Wei saw Meijia's completely inexplicable reaction, which further confirmed his thoughts.
Zeng Xiaoxian didn't care, and asked him: "Guan Gu wants to find a part-time job, what's your opinion?"
Meijia's enthusiastic smile disappeared immediately, replaced by an embarrassed face, like a child who was caught doing something bad: "Me? You ask Yoyo about such an important thing, I'm not Guan Gu's girlfriend This is a private matter, I... how can I get involved. If my opinion destroys your loving life, then my sin will be serious. "
Don't you just want to hear everyone's opinions?Earning extra money is not looking for an affair, but it will also affect the relationship?Everyone is even more inexplicable.
Guan Gu thought she didn't understand, and explained it carefully: "Meijia, you have been my assistant before, so you should know me better. What do you think are my strengths?"
"Strengths?" Meijia looked as if someone had stepped on her tail, her face turned red, and she replied in a panic, "How do I know where you are?"
Guan Gu thought he said nothing wrong?What about Meijia's face... "Watermelon, apple, grilled chicken wings, Oh! No!" Zhang Wei booed and took out his phone to take a picture of Meijia.
"I...I'm so desperate to urinate!" Meijia found an excuse and ran away in a panic.
The evidence is solid, Meijia doesn't blush when she sees Teacher Zeng, she doesn't blush when she sees Zhang Wei, but she blushes when she sees Guan Gu and Youyou.Zhang Wei was very satisfied with his deduction, and he was even more proud when he looked at the photos on his phone, and then at Meijia.
Finally, the people dispersed, and they could watch TV quietly for a while, but Zhang Wei was looking at her wretchedly, Meijia felt uncomfortable all over, and couldn't help yelling at him: "Hey! Have you watched enough? I Do you have money on your face?"
Zhang Wei chuckled: "I don't have money, I have desires!"
Meijia was almost choked by him, and became even more angry: "I sprayed you to death with a mouthful of salt soda, and you still have pimples on your face!"
Zhang Wei showed her the photo on his phone. In the photo, Mika's face was as red as a cooked crayfish!According to criminal psychology, you think about it every day and dream at night.Mika’s blushing is a typical conditioned reflex, and it’s a strong self-suggestion in her subconscious, which can be covered up on the surface, but Zhang Wei went on to say: “For a reasoning expert like me, all of your things are just deception, and you can’t escape. My piercing eyes!"
He told Meijia what was on his mind, so he had no choice but to scold him: "Nonsense! I must have seen him too much recently to be like this. Don't pretend to be Bao Qingtian just because you have a scar on your forehead! You bloody nigger, big briquettes !A master of reasoning, push your dung ball away!"
"Do you dream of it if you see it too much?" Zhang Wei smiled maliciously, took out a photo of himself as a lawyer in a suit and handed it to Mika, "Please prove it! If you look at my... photo every day, you can also If you dream of me, then you win. If you fail, please take the initiative to surrender to my wisdom, don't deny it, you can't pretend to be blushing!"
What a show!Take photos with you!Looking at Zhang Wei's photo, Meijia gritted her teeth and agreed.
A few days later, Meijia really dozed off on the sofa again, dreaming.It was still the smoky room, it was still the doll fishing machine, it was still Guan Gu and her, fishing for dolls hand in hand.
Seeing that the biggest and most beautiful doll was caught again, Meijia shouted excitedly: "Ah! Ah! I caught it again."
Guan Gu looked at her dotingly: "Honey, why did you say 'again'? Just now you said it was the first time you played this game."
Meijia replied coquettishly: "I lied to you, but I am actually an expert."
"Nani?" Guan Gu seemed to have expected it a long time ago, stroking her hand ambiguously, "Then you teach me, hand in hand."
Meijia suddenly remembered that the last kiss was seen by a crayfish.Her secret must have been told by that crayfish, otherwise how would Zhang Wei know? "Wait a minute." Meijia hurried to the side and dumped the plate of crayfish on the table into the trash can, now it's safe.The two approached sweetly, holding hands...
Just being romantic, a huge crayfish suddenly crawled out from behind the sofa, no, it was a crayfish with a human face! "Ah! Zhang Wei!" Mika screamed in fright.
As soon as he opened his eyes, Zhang Wei sat beside him, salivating and asked, "Did you dream of me?" Mika was startled again, and subconsciously moved to the side, remembering the previous agreement, and said lightly, "Yes. ! My suspicion is cleared."
Then why doesn't Meijia blush when she sees herself?Listening to Mika's description, it turned out that in her dream she was just a crayfish?If you look closely, you can still vaguely recognize the human form?You're making a sci-fi movie!Wait, Meijia is not allergic to crayfish, how could she turn pale with fright when she sees a crayfish?There must be a conspiracy, and there must be ambiguities that have not been revealed! "Ah! It's Guan Gu, right?"
Meijia's face turned red again, and the composure she had just now disappeared, she lowered her head and denied it: "You promised, it will be fine if you dream of you, and I didn't say anything else."
"You still blushed when you dreamed of Guan Gu this time, but I'm actually a lobster. Doesn't that explain the problem?" Zhang Weiyue said more and more angrily, I am a big lawyer, and I am a shrimp in your dream?It's fine if you don't have a crush on me, and you don't have to spoil me like this, right?No, I have to give her a tough trick! "You're not afraid of Guan Gu, Yoyo knows?"
Meijia really panicked, and threatened: "If you dare to tell them, you will die, stinky briquettes!"
Okay, don't admit defeat and scold me! "Let's see!" Zhang Wei said and walked out.With a guilty conscience, Meijia chased after her.
3
Half of it is friendship, half is love... Zeng Xiaoxian was flipping through extreme sports magazines boredly, humming "Dilemma".Alas, Nuolan and Yifei, how did they get into the current situation in a daze!Ordinarily, Nuolan should be regarded as love, and Yifei should be regarded as friendship, but how far is the gap between love and friendship?It was just a momentary soft-heartedness, but the friendship with Nuo Lan turned into today's love.As for Yifei, if he had been a little braver back then, would he have owned her instead of being upset about her blind date now.well!
Someone knocked on the door, interrupting his cranky thoughts.When I opened the door, I saw a man with spectacles who was full of vibes, holding a handful of huge flowers, and asked with a smile on his face, "Excuse me, does Miss Hu Yifei live here?"
The person who came was Billy, one of Hu Yifei's many suitors.I have had a little communication on the Internet, but I haven't met in person yet, but I have a good impression of Hu Yifei, and I think she is a very, very special woman.So, I specially booked a seat for a French dinner this day, and came to treat her to dinner.
It happened that Hu Yifei was not here today, and Zeng Xiaoxian just sent him away and asked him to call the restaurant another day.
"I've bought the restaurant, and it's fine another day. But the chef was specially invited from France, and I'm still waiting." Billy thought about it, took out his phone and dialed: "Hey, let the cook go back to Paris first. Wait for my notice."
This posture, this style, Zeng Xiaoxian was taken aback: "This big brother, the rich second generation?"
Billy smiled modestly: "I'm not, my grandpa is."
Damn it, what dating site still has such high-end users?But why do high-end users take a fancy to Hu Yifei?Could it be that she is the only female user?In the past, just listening to her talk made her feel uncomfortable, but now that the suitor is standing in front of her alive, Zeng Xiaoxian is even more unhappy.no!Gotta find a way to break them up!With a certain idea, Zeng Xiaoxian laughed dryly and persuaded Billy, "Don't bother the French compatriots. Hu Yifei doesn't like blind dates and always eats, it's boring."
"Then I can watch a movie with her. I'll go to Buyer Cinema right away." Billy obviously misunderstood what he meant, and immediately started calling again.
Zeng Xiaoxian persuaded again: "Big brother, no, big brother! It's useless for you to buy a theater chain, it's not worth it." Who would have thought that Billy would fall in love with Yifei with all his heart, thinking that she was very appetizing, no matter how much money he spent. value.Money, money, money again, is it amazing to be rich?When dating a girl, you have to be special. Does spending money count as a special feature?Of course, spending like him should be considered "ruthless" and distinctive.
"Yifei is special, she...sees sincerity." Zeng Xiaoxian pondered, procrastinating to think of a solution, and happened to find a photo of bungee jumping in the magazine in his hand, and immediately continued happily, "For example, bungee jumping is good, dare you? "
Billy looked embarrassed, this... looked really taken aback.Zeng Xiaoxian's heart was more than half relaxed, and he was still embellishing: "Don't dare? How can it be considered sincerity? Yifei likes to take risks the most. If the date is not life-threatening, she will feel uncomfortable. How? Do you still think she is special? "It is said that if the IQ exceeds 120, it is easy to deal with the rich and handsome.Jump, you dance, blend into the blue sky, hahahaha!Zeng Xiaoxian couldn't help laughing smugly.
Who knows that the world is unpredictable, and the careless Billy is not only rich, but also courageous, so he really invites Yifei to go bungee jumping.With Yifei's personality, of course he had a lot of fun!Billy not only took a group photo, but also held Yifei's little hand, and sent out the group photo and the story of dating Yifei.This time, there was an uproar on Hu Yifei's blind date forum.Yes, you heard that right, because there are so many suitors, Blind Date.com specially set up a suitor forum for Hu Yifei, for everyone to understand Yifei's hobbies and interests, communicate and exchange, it is very popular!I have always heard that Yifei is an iceberg beauty, and many people can't even get an appointment, let alone take advantage of the beauty, but now Billy is able to win a confidant smile and make the iceberg start to melt. Obviously, there are experts behind him. !But who would have thought that the expert Zeng Xiaoxian originally wanted Billy to retreat in the face of difficulties so that they could be separated?
One day Zeng Xiaoxian was chatting at the bar, the waiter came over and said that there were some guests at the door who wanted to invite him to have a drink, and three men in suits raised their glasses as a gesture of gesture.But you don't know them?After hesitating for a moment, the stinky Zeng Xiaoxian immediately found a reason for himself, fans must be fans, it is definitely possible!So Shi Shiran walked over.
Who knew it was Yifei's suitor again, this time there was not just one, but three!Azhi, Ahao, and Ade all saw Hu Yifei on a dating website, and they were very interested in Yifei, but she didn't seem to accept their sincerity, and asked her out for dinner several times and refused to show respect.Later, Billy posted a photo of him and Yifei, and the three people got together. They wondered how Billy could come up with such a good idea of bungee jumping, so they were cruel, and asked Billy with 20 gold coins. Only then did I get the address of an expert, and I came here especially for the name.
Zeng Xiaoxian curled his lips: "Aren't they all tall, handsome and rich, and 20 forum coins are still used?"
"Ours are real gold coins." Ahao said shyly, as if having money is such a shameful thing.Embarrassed, Zeng Xiaoxian quickly turned his face away, pretending to say hello to an acquaintance.
Azhi asked: "May I ask, what is your relationship with Yifei? How do you know her so well?"
"Me?" Zeng Xiaoxian waved his arms excitedly, but he kept making gestures, but he really didn't know the relationship between him and Yifei, lover?Obviously not.friend?Even more wrong.With the current situation, he has nothing to do with Hu Yifei at all.The result of the analysis was so bleak, Zeng Xiaoxian was stunned for a long time before he came back to his senses, Lang smiled and said: "That's because I am a host of an emotional show. I understand girls' thoughts best."
The three of them couldn't guess what he was thinking, and they admired him so much that they all bowed to Zeng Xiaoxian: "Then please teach us how to date Yifei! Please!"
Zeng Xiaoxian declined: "No, no... this..."
The three of them said in unison again: "We give 50 gold coins!"
50 gold coins!Pure gold!Zeng Xiaoxian seemed to see the money floating in the sky, and forgot how to refuse.
Once spread to ten, ten to hundreds, Zeng Xiaoxian soon became the sweet potato in the hands of many suitors of a Philippine. I just hope that Zeng Dagao can give me some advice, so that I can kiss Fangze.
Ziqiao was puzzled, is Zeng Xiaoxian good at chasing Yifei?The TV series has been on for four seasons, and Zeng Xiaoxian has never even made a decent confession to Yifei, instead he went off track and chased after Nuolan, what can he teach him?Maybe successful people are too busy to have time to fall in love, so Zeng Xiaoxian said a few nonsense, and a group of out-of-stocks took it seriously.
With a good deal in front of him, Ziqiao decided to deeply develop Yifei's residual value and hold classes for suitors once a week at a reasonable fee.In view of the devotion and respect everyone has for Zeng Xiaoxian, he is the one who should give the lecturer.
"Me?!" Zeng Xiaoxian was taken aback by Qiao Hongwei's plan, "I have nothing to teach them, nor am I interested in teaching them!"
Zi Qiao tried on a new suit, looking around she was very handsome, she didn't take Zeng Xiaoxian's refusal seriously, and said casually: "Since you are so determined, I can only tell them, I, Teacher Lu, teach in person."
Zeng Xiaoxian pissed him off: "Why do you teach? You never chased Yifei!"
Ziqiao glanced at him disdainfully: "You're not the only one who knows Yifei, and this is my specialty."
Don't be afraid of being tall, rich, handsome and rich, but afraid of being tall, rich, handsome and smart!Lu Ziqiao went to teach, so what? !Professor Zeng weighed the pros and cons, and finally realized that whoever will go to hell will go to hell if I don't, and I will fight for Yifei not to be chased away!
4
Under the care of his elder brother Du Jun, Guan Gu finally found a somewhat reasonable part-time job, helping police comrades draw portraits of suspects.Of course, it's just a small police station, and the suspect's target is definitely not some gangster who murders and steals money. He just helps to draw a thief, pervert or something to help maintain law and order in the area.Being able to serve the community and have a little relationship with his major, Guan Gu is already very satisfied.
When the work started, Guan Gu was sitting upright with a sketchpad in his hands. Du Jun saw his serious look and couldn't help but sneered.Guan Gu thought that he had done something wrong to make the big brother look down on him, until he met the first person who reported the crime.
The first person to make a statement was a young girl.It is said that on the bus, a thief has been trying to trick her. "I remember he was wearing a gold Rolex watch from the Greenwich Oyster Perpetual series. His belt was Hermès' lychee pattern 3.8 universal type. The shoes were just average, Gucci's 2006 old model."
Xiao Meimei observed carefully enough, so let's talk about the suspect's appearance.
"Appearance? How can I remember that!" The girl shook her head blankly, "Oh, yes, the ring on his left middle finger is from the Cartier Trinity three-color gold series."
Guan Gu widened his eyes and asked: "That man is so rich, are you sure he is a thief?"
The girl nodded very positively: "Of course! From the moment he got in the car, he rubbed against my back! He must be trying to steal my bag, so I hugged it desperately, and he could only rub against my leg. For more than an hour, I didn't let go of him until he was out of breath!"
Guan Gu and Du Jun looked at each other, deeply worried about Meimei's IQ, but what to paint after worrying?Is it a Rolex gold watch, or a Hermès belt?Guan Gu's hand holding the paintbrush froze.
The second is a Korean man.As soon as he came in, he beat his chest and stamped his feet, danced and slapped out Korean words: "My car was broken into, and my computer was lost. Sir, you must help me catch the thief and get the computer back. The photos inside are very important to me. If it leaks out, the consequences will be unimaginable, and my girlfriend will definitely hate me..."
"Sir, please speak Mandarin?" Guan Gu reminded him politely.
"I speak Korean Mandarin. What should I do? I'm so anxious! I feel like I'm going to explode!" The Korean male contestant drew an explosion gesture. Du Jun immediately understood and told Guan Gu that he seemed to say that the suspect was an explosion. head.Still gesturing to confirm with others, right, Smecta?
The man nodded again and again: "Yes, it's the feeling of going to explode, Smecta, I have been with my girlfriend for five years, and I have survived the car accident, amnesia and leukemia. You must help me this time..."
I can help you, but I watched a whole episode of the Korean drama, and the suspect didn't show up, Brother Smecta?Guan Gu turned the pen holder boredly, but still couldn't write.
The third place is a hawker who sells chicken in the vegetable market.This is good, I don't speak a foreign language, but... a gorgeous local dialect!Of course, for Guan Gu, who has lived in China for several years, language communication is not a problem, so please describe what happened carefully and specifically.
"I was selling chickens at the vegetable market this morning. A Korean man was chasing a thief and passing by. I went to watch the excitement. When I came back, I found that one chicken was missing! The one I lost was silky chicken, an authentic domestic chicken, 38 It walks like this.” The peddler’s description was really specific, he clucked like a hen and walked like a hen at the same time...
Seeing Guan Gu stunned, the peddler urged: "Hey? Why don't you draw?" Uncle, do you want us to draw a thief or your silky chicken?
Thankfully, the fourth is finally here.As soon as the aunt came up, she went straight to the topic: "The guy who cheated me of money looks very special - triangular eyes and beard, protruding ears and sausage mouth, oh, and there is such a long scar on his face, it's scary! "
With such a scary appearance, how can he still deceive people?Guan Gu's brain is a bit insufficient, and he still can't draw.Du Jun reminded from the side: "Let's draw. All the handsome ones are going to act in idol dramas, and who will be a liar!"
Combining all kinds of confessions, Guan Gu finally drew an ugly monster with an afro head, triangular eyes, beard, protruding ears, sausage mouth, and a huge knife scar.Du Jun comforted him, although there were some obstacles, it was also rewarding.But Guan Gu's heart, eager to serve the people and uphold justice, suddenly fell to the bottom.
After being completely disappointed with the big brother, Guan Gu moved to 58.com again. I really thought that "Yang Mi" had done a few advertisements, and that's where the job was found?In addition to the full screen of online part-time jobs and Taobao stores, there is only one left: extras - Japanese soldiers, daily salary, settlement on the day, and box lunch.
Youyou doesn't understand, Guan Gu is now in a hurry to go to the doctor, even willing to be an actor, why is he not willing to be an art teacher?
Guan Gu's explanation is, "I don't want to teach, I was born for creation." But go to the crew to play tricks, does this have something to do with creation?Guan Gu said again, "It doesn't matter much, but at least it won't be so uncomfortable if you change your line of work." Looking into it carefully, the reason why Guan Gu rejects becoming an art teacher is because he equates being a teacher with the failure of his own comic business. A profession related to art, but it feels like it has dropped several grades.Youyou saw through his mind, sat next to him, smiled and enlightened him: "Guan Gu, it's nothing, just look around and say I'm fine, I was born for acting, the result is; A TV presenter, now; and Zhang Wei, just meet any opponent, sharpen his head and insist on becoming a lawyer. Everyone has ideals and pursuits, but no one can reach the sky in one step, and they have to take their time. Sometimes A compromise does not mean failure, maybe an opportunity is just around the corner.”
Guan Gu was a little moved by her words, and asked hesitantly: "Do you really think I should be a teacher?"
Youyou nodded and encouraged him: "Try it, at least being a teacher will not affect your health, dignity, or IQ, and it's very meaningful."
Guan Gu shook his head, and sighed again: "I don't want to hurt anyone. I studied painting for so long, and now I'm still looking for a part-time job."
"But those children you teach may be luckier than you. They will meet a more responsible and far-sighted teacher. Teacher Guan Gu will definitely not let this kind of embarrassment happen again!" Youyou smiled, looking at the little girl in front of her. A man who is at a loss like a child, "If your students will succeed in their studies in the future and don't need to find a part-time job, wouldn't that be the greatest success for you?"
Teacher Guan Gu, this title sounds pretty good.Coupled with the scene painted by Yoyo, Guan Gu suddenly felt that his image was much taller.Just as he was thinking, Zhang Wei and Meijia ran in noisyly back and forth. "I said it!" "Say it!" "I really said it!" "Say it if you have the ability!" The two chattered, not knowing what they were arguing about.
Zhang Wei cleared his throat and announced with a smirk on his face, "You two, I have important news to tell you!"
"Shut up, you big briquette!" Mika, who was fearless just now, suddenly rushed forward, tightly covered Zhang Wei's mouth, and explained to Guan Gu and Yoyo: "He has bad breath, it's time to rinse his mouth!"
Guan Gu said happily: "Actually, I also have important news to tell you, I plan to become an art teacher!"
Meijia was happy for him, congratulations to him for finally figuring it out, and some vague voices leaked from Zhang Wei's covered mouth, which was incomprehensible.
"I'm going to apply for the job tomorrow, wish me success!" After saying that, Guan Gu went over to hug the two of them.Meijia dodged in embarrassment, and continued to cover Zhang Wei's mouth to prevent him from speaking: "Don't come here! As long as you have Yoyo's support, I... just came to find Zhang Wei."
Youyou felt strange, and asked her what was wrong, Zhang Wei pushed Mika's hand away vigorously, and shouted triumphantly: "I know!"
"I said it myself!" Meijia rushed ahead of him, lowered her head, as if confessing, "I... I had a dream. Yoyo, I was wrong, I dreamed about Guan Gu. In the dream, Guan Gu and I Alone... playing with the claw machine, very intimate, and was seen by a crayfish... twice."
"The second lobster is actually me!" Zhang Wei interjected uncontrollably.
"Don't worry, Yoyo, I won't destroy your relationship. I..." Meijia pursed her lips, so anxious that tears were about to fall.Youyou thought it was funny, and comforted her softly: "Meijia, it's just a dream, it doesn't mean you have anything to do with Guan Gu. Maybe, what you fell in love with is claw machine fishing, or crayfish. Didn't these happen several times? It's also possible that you were just moved by the picture we described that day, and you also long for this kind of intimate feeling of love?"
"I got it, I got it!" Zhang Wei couldn't help interjecting meanly again, "You mean, Mika has been single for too long, she's hungry?!" Of course, before she finished speaking, Mika pinched her again and again. screw.
"Let's do an experiment. At this very moment, are you calling Guan Gu?" Yoyo pointed at Guan Gu, who looked like a slovenly homeboy.Meijia took a closer look and shook her head decisively.Yoyo smiled and concluded: "Then it's all right!"
Meijia jumped up excitedly, and the guilt and self-blame of the past few days was swept away: "It's great, I didn't fall in love with Guan Gu!"
"Hey! It's not fair, I'll go change clothes." The stubborn Guan Gu wanted to save some face, but Yoyo gave him a hard look, and comforted Mika with a smile: "You're fine, you're just feeling hot, no In heat, don't be angry...I mean, it's time for you to find a man to fall in love with."
"A man? Hey, I'm a man too." Zhang Wei puffed up his chest, trying his best to make his image a bit more majestic.Meijia glanced at him and commented coldly: "You are not, crayfish!"
5
In the first lecture of "Basic Introduction to Dating Hu Yifei", 14 classmates came. Xiaoxian was in class and Ziqiao was teaching assistant.
"As we all know, Hu Yifei, a female doctor born in the year of dog and born under the sign of Leo, is a complex and rare creature. What exactly does she need in her heart? This is a science." As soon as he said a few words, all the young people in the audience chattered. Desperately taking notes; some people shouted, the teacher's opening remarks are so good!Zeng Xiaoxian stayed for a while, saying that someone listened to all this?You rich second generations are really endangered high-risk creatures!But some people praised him, after all, he still feels good about himself, and he soon began to feel a little bit like a "beast".
"Okay! Let's interpret Hu Yifei's various expressions today." Zeng Xiaoxian signaled to Ziqiao, and Ziqiao opened the first PPT file - a photo wall composed of Hu Yifei's various expressions, facing the goddess' various demeanors, Everyone was naturally amazed, and they became more motivated to learn. "Among all expressions, smiles are the most common and the most connotative. As long as you can understand Yifei's various smiles, you can take the initiative in dating."
first slide!On weekdays, they face each other day and night, and suddenly saw Yifei's high-definition photo magnified N times, Zeng Xiaoxian's heart skipped a beat.Slender and soft eyebrows, gentle and amiable eyes, straight but playful round nose, moist and beautiful lips like flowers, standard oval face with a pointed chin, a little fleshy face, a little more disgusting Fat, a little less layering is not enough, just such a good arc makes the whole face vivid and natural.
"She looks very happy!" commented a classmate.Zeng Xiaoxian came back to his senses and licked his lips: "Wrong! At first glance, she is smiling happily, but please observe carefully, the lines of her mouth are a bit stiff, and her eyes are not flexible enough. This is a typical forced smile! It shows your She is not interested in the topic at all, she just cooperates politely and suggests that you better change the topic."
Wow, the Chinese version of Professor Cal Lightman!The students' admiration for Professor Zeng suddenly flooded into page after page of notes like a torrential river, for fear of missing a word of excellence.
The second one, laugh out loud, this one must be happy!Girls pay attention to smiling without showing their teeth, Yifei opened his mouth and laughed, he was a bit carried away! "Wrong again! Please note that this time Yifei smiled with her eyes closed, but we can infer that if her eyes are open now, the direction of her gaze is upward, that is to say, she is not looking at You. Or we can interpret it as she rolled her eyes at you with her eyes closed. This is a sarcastic mockery! Often accompanied by a sharp drawl and looking at you through her nostrils. Don’t be complacent, because the next One word, she will make you want to cry."
Thinking of Yifei's cynicism to him, Zeng Xiaoxian unconsciously twisted the corner of his mouth, and Ziqiao next to him suddenly laughed non-stop.Zeng Xiaoxian yelled at him angrily: "Classroom discipline! Next one!"
The third one, with a toothless smile, looks like he is yawning. "If you think this is a signal to send her home, then you can really go home. What is Hu Yifei? Leo! Queen! The queen will not hide her ridicule, dissatisfaction, and anger at you, but she does not She likes to expose her true thoughts in front of others, which is why she covers her mouth at this time. But we can see from her eyes and eyebrows that there is no exaggeration, which shows that she is currently in a state of complete relaxation, and her eyes are soft. It's a sign of acceptance. It's the only time she's actually smiling. If you see that, congratulations, you made her laugh."
"Yes!" Ah Hao from the audience suddenly shouted excitedly, lowered his voice but still said to his tablemate in a very embarrassing manner: "The last time I invited Yifei to dinner, she kept doing this for a long time. I have something to play."
Zi Qiao sneered: "That's because this classmate has body odor, next one!"
The fourth photo, with a cold smile, Yifei in the photo is noble and glamorous, completely like a goddess!But don't overlook a very important detail, the devil is hidden in the details, her fingers are exerting force, and the spoon in her hand has been twisted and bent. "Look carefully at her eyes, is she staying in the same direction? But her eyes are not the dullness we said before when she was bored, but the signal that the alarm device in her body started to lock the target! Of course, when Yifei's hand When something on the screen is deformed, the expression is no longer important, which means that you have caused trouble. Then, after two seconds, you will see the following screen."
Ziqiao turned the page and accidentally released a beautiful woman with big breasts. The audience was in an uproar, and Zeng Xiaoxian coughed from choking.Dong dong dong, cutting three photos in a row, Yifei opened her almond eyes, raised her eyebrows, clenched her fists, and gritted her teeth, completely in an attack state.
"When you see the following expressions—" Zeng Xiaoxian urged earnestly, "Run! Run quickly! Don't—turn around and take pictures!" Everyone trembled in fright, and after shaking, they frantically took notes.
Under the training of Zeng Xiaoxian and Lu Ziqiao, Yifei's blind dates became more and more harmonious, and those boys who chased her seemed to suddenly become enlightened, and they seemed to have become more sensible overnight.The topic is over, and the date is no longer boring.When I was thirsty, the water was delivered before I reached out; when I was sleepy, I sent her home before I yawned.Therefore, Yifei's mood is getting better and better, and the sun is shining and the wind is beautiful all over the world.
"Could it be that God is hinting at me? Tell me, should I consider choosing someone for a formal relationship?" During the chat, Yifei asked Zeng Xiaoxian for his opinion.
Zeng Xiaoxian really couldn't think of any reason to stop her, so he was anxious, so he could only perfunctorily say: "Don't be so impulsive, let's see."
Is this a kind of retention?Yifei's heart moved a bit, but when she thought of Nuolan, she suddenly lost her courage, forced a smile, and pretended to be generous and said: "Almost, since these guys have good hardware and software, I can't keep hanging on them. Forget about Nuolan's concern."
Zeng Xiaoxian couldn't figure it out.Nolan?What could be on her mind?Yifei looked at him and sighed in her heart, how could she fall in love with such a fool!Leave a faint sentence: "You don't understand."
As soon as Yifei turned around and left, Zeng Xiaoxian anxiously went to Lu Ziqiao to settle accounts. If it wasn't for his bad idea of holding a training class, how could those suitors get close to her?Now Yifei said that he would randomly pick any applicant to be her boyfriend within three days, which was simply too hasty!He was sloppy, look at his life now!Aggrieved, too aggrieved!
"That's great. After you teach the basic class, you can start the practical class. The longer they get along, the longer we will have to worry about food and drink!" Lu Ziqiao didn't care, "Why don't we be responsible for our friends? Provide the results of the quiz to Yifei so that she can have a reference for her choice?"
Zeng Xiaoxian was stunned: "When did we have an in-class quiz?"
Ziqiao smiled and said, "I'm a teaching assistant after all? After you finish class, I will keep them and check the effect of the lectures. There are a few top-notch ones."
Zeng Xiaoxian was furious: "Can this count? They are simply cheating. If I hadn't told them the tricks, they would have been able to get within one foot and three feet?!"
"Isn't this the purpose of our school? You also accepted the gift and the PPT, and now you want to regret it?" Ziqiao patted him on the shoulder and persuaded, "Mr. Zeng, just be responsible to Nuolan Already, a man who picks a man, you earn your extra money. Do you need to be so excited?"
"Who... who said that I was excited?!" Zeng Xiaoxian let himself suffer, his eyes were scattered and his eyebrows were trembling with anger.
So far, the only way to stop the enemy outside the blockade is to tell the students about the dangers of dating Hu Yifei, which can scare those who have never seen the world to death!
"Everyone knows that Hu Yifei is a female doctor, a black belt in Taekwondo, and a tennis master. Is this series of titles a coincidence? Absolutely not! Yifei has a weird temper, is moody, and has a strong competitive spirit. If you lose to her, She will think you are useless; if you win her, then she will win two games with you, three games in five games, four games in seven games, until she defeats you, and then... think you are useless!"
"Of course, as a woman, there will always be times when she is lost and vulnerable. She will also be confused sometimes. Once she feels frustrated, she will find a place to hide herself. If you can't find her, you will be worried; if When you find her, you will be more worried—because she will often vent her anger by competing with you, as for the result of the competition, please refer to the previous article."
"Finally, and most importantly, if any of you have the misfortune to date her, please don't hold her hand. Because she knows ninjutsu—flick."
Why did the wind direction of the technical indicators analyzed by the teacher suddenly change?The students were in an uproar and whispered to each other.
Ade raised his hand and asked, "Teacher, how can you count as a relationship if you don't hold hands?"
Zeng Xiaoxian asked solemnly: "Is relationship more important or life more important?"
Billy said: "I held her hand once while bungee jumping, isn't that scary?"
Zeng Xiaoxian was stunned, and the students in the audience immediately mobbed, "Teacher, have you ever held her hand?" "Teacher, why do you always speak ill of Xiao Feifei today?"
"Xiao Feifei? Is that your name!" Zeng Xiaoxian was irritated for no reason.Billy replied innocently: "You didn't say it yourself. When she is unhappy, should you call her that?"
"You, you, you... stand up for me!" Zeng Xiaoxian was visibly excited again, and with a flick of his finger when pointing people, five students stood up.Pressed down four irritably, and asked Billy alone: "Quiz in class! Why is Mao Yifei surnamed Hu, but his younger brother Zhanbo's surname is Lu?"
Billy said confidently: "Because they are a reorganized family." Zi Qiao nodded and answered correctly!
Zeng Xiaoxian asked again: "What is Yifei's worst but favorite thing to do?"
"Make a cake, and Ficky." The answer is correct again!
"Explain why she got a doctorate?"
"Because a tough life can't be explained." Billy answered with his head held high, with a hint of toughness in his air, it must be correct!
Zeng Xiaoxian was a little at a loss for words, and threw out his trump card: "What is Yifei's greatest ideal? What kind of man is that?"
"Her greatest ideal is to have a man tell her what her real ideal is! That man is either smarter or stronger than her, otherwise why should he conquer her?" Billy clenched his fists to himself Come on, "I will work hard!"
correct answer!Zi Qiao gave him a heartfelt thumbs up.
It's not that we didn't work hard, it's because the enemy is too tough!Zeng Xiaoxian took a breath and said in frustration: "It seems that I have nothing more to teach you. From today onwards, you have all graduated, so go your own way. Remember, treat Yifei well."
"I have a problem!" Suddenly, Yifei appeared behind Zeng Xiaoxian.Zeng Xiaoxian looked back when he heard the sound, his face changed with fright.Zi Qiao leaned over and quickly stepped aside when he saw that the momentum was not right.
"The teacher said that when you have this expression, you should..." Ade reminded everyone that everyone yelled "Run!"Billy only felt that his legs were weak and he couldn't move, so he simply stood still.It turned out that Billy, who was careless, asked his classmates if they wanted to copy notes. When sending a group text message, he sent it to the wrong person and sent it to Hu Yifei.
"Aren't you two bored like fossils, and you actually train here?!" Yifei scanned the audience coldly, and found a girl in the corner: "Who is this girl? She also came to my blind date? "
Ah Hao smiled and explained: "She is my girlfriend, she came to listen."
"Girlfriend?" Zeng Xiaoxian was really surprised by their IQ.
"I didn't have a girlfriend at first, but after two classes, I found that I was probably useless, so I found a girlfriend." Ahao nodded embarrassedly, "I have spent all the money, so I have to get the certificate Bar."
"All—give—me—get out!" Yifei gritted her teeth, and issued the order to evict the guest word by word.Zi Qiao and the others took the opportunity to run out, only Zeng Xiaoxian who was dumbfounded and Billy who couldn't run were left.
Seeing Yifei's furious look, Zeng Xiaoxian said in a low voice, "It's you who complained that these people are not creative."
"It's none of your business, if you want you to go to extra lengths to help me sell, do you really want me to find a boyfriend quickly?" Yi Fei pouted at him unceremoniously.
"He's a good teacher," Billy interjected ignorantly.
"Who's talking?" Yifei just treated him as air.
"Don't worry, I'll take care of it." Billy winked at Zeng Xiaoxian, and called Yifei with a straight face: "——Feifei, little Feifei, Feifeifeifeifei..."
Yifei turned his head, his eyes emitted rays, and Billy instantly disappeared, Zeng Xiaoxian couldn't bear to cover his eyes.
"My surname is Zeng! You don't learn so many weapons in China, you prefer to learn the sword, the upper sword does not practice the lower sword, and the iron sword does not practice the silver sword! Congratulations, you have finally reached the realm of the unity of human and sword - sword man. I I haven’t gotten to know you well enough to allow you to show off my privacy in front of outsiders, let alone say bad things about me! It’s you who are the most immature, boring, and stupid! Don’t think you know me very well. It's far away, who are you!" Yifei felt his heart was empty after finishing his long speech, and his eyes started to feel a little sour when he stared at him.Zeng Xiaoxian, haven't you hurt me enough?
"Starting today, we will break off our relationship!" Yifei gave the ultimatum slowly but firmly, and slammed the door and left.In the empty classroom, only Zeng Xiaoxian was left standing there, and Yifei's sad eyes seemed to stab a knife in his heart, and the pain grew deeper and deeper.
6
It was late at night, Zhang Wei was wrapped in the quilt, his eyes rolled, and he smiled ambiguously, obviously dreaming.
In the dream, surrounded by smoke, there is a magical claw fishing machine in the middle of the room! "Ah! Ah! Yes!" Zhang Wei shouted excitedly after catching another doll.Guan Gu stared at him with a doting smile on his face: "Sorry! You are a genius!"
Zhang Wei glanced at him coquettishly: "You teach well."
Guan Gu's eyes became more intense: "No, it's you who are smart."
Zhang Wei tilted his head and acted cutely: "Then let's catch another... I want that crayfish!"
"No problem!" Guan Gu approached and held Zhang Wei's hands. Zhang Wei raised his head slightly, his eyes were full of happiness and satisfaction...
Halfway through the dream, Zhang Wei suddenly woke up. Recalling the scene in the dream, he couldn't help but widen his eyes and growled in despair: "Oh, No..."
(End of this chapter)
1
Soon, Nolan went to the United States.Now that they have decided to be together, Zeng Xiaoxian's good man qualities are naturally displayed to the fullest. In addition to video chatting at a fixed time every day, he also came up with various tricks to increase each other's presence.For example, give Nuo Lan a male model's prosthetic hand, and then prepare a female model's prosthetic hand for herself, hold that hand when she misses it, and pretend that the other party is by her side.The intention is good, but the implementation is a bit wretched, and it hurts a group of roommates, and anyone who sees it will get goosebumps all over.
And Nuo Lan, of course, cooperated in every possible way with Zeng Xiaoxian's actions, despite being separated by mountains and rivers, she was still full of tenderness and held his heart firmly.But no matter what, since he already knew what Yifei was thinking, he was still a little uneasy about keeping her and Zeng Xiaoxian together day and night.It happened that one of her classmates opened a dating website for high-end people, and Nuo Lan passed Yifei's information to it, and as a result, everyone responded.Yifei, who receives a lot of application letters every day, is naturally in a good mood, or it is for An Nuolan's heart, pretending to be in a good mood, it is unknown.In life, the most important thing is of course the future, maybe there is a suitable person waiting for her?
As soon as he heard that Nuo Lan had introduced Yifei to a blind date, Zeng Xiaoxian immediately exploded: "Blind... kiss? How can you date if you have nothing to do? There are too many scammers on the Internet! Are you reliable, and..."
Yifei interrupted him, and asked casually: "By the way, the Weiwei that Zhang Wei has a crush on is also a lawyer after a long time, and he is also his competitor, do you know?"
Zeng Xiaoxian was stunned: "I know, but this has something to do with me?"
Immediately afterwards, Yifei yelled at him angrily: "Then Nuolan's helping me on a blind date has something to do with you!"
In the past, Zeng Xiaoxian might still have some right to speak, but if he says such things now, what is his position?Now that I have Nuolan, should I let Yifei continue to wait for him alone?The reason is that, the hurdle in my heart is still difficult to pass, so I am depressed.Meijia wanted to go over to have a chat with Nuo Lan, but he blasted her away angrily.
Why don't you just fall in love, pretend to be nasty every day, and get nervous, am I in your way?The more Mika thought about it, the more unhappy she became.Walking to the next door, I saw Guan Gu and Youyou were counting the plush toys that filled the room, as if they had robbed the entire toy store.Upon questioning, it turned out that Guan Gu accompanied Youyou to buy crayfish, and seeing a machine in the next door shop that uses large pliers to catch dolls, the two of them tried it out.Unexpectedly, Guan Gu played too much in Japan when he was a child. He had a lot of research on this claw machine or fishing claw machine. He passed on the tricks to Yoyo, and then gave him a little guidance. The dolls in the whole machine were moved back home.
"It's you who taught me well." "No, it's because you're smart." "No, it's because you are patient." "No, I'm sure you won't be able to catch it with someone else." "Well...you have a sweet mouth." The two of them spoke nakedly. Showing affection, Qingqing me, Meijia looked even more upset, why are people all over the world falling in love? !Zeng Xiaoxian was flying a kite by Nuo Lan, Yifei was busy picking a high-quality man, Zhang Wei was fighting a lawsuit against his crush, and Lu Ziqiao was always galloping, as if Meijia was the only one left in the love apartment.
With nowhere to go and no one to accompany, Meijia leaned on the bookshelf reading comics boredly, and fell asleep without knowing it.
Suddenly, the surrounding area was smoky, and there was a doll fishing machine in the room. Guan Gu stood behind her and taught her how to catch dolls.Every time he catches one, Guan Gu will look at her with a smile, and praise him: "I'm sorry! This one is hard to catch."
Meijia shyly said: "Guan Gu-jun, if you hadn't taught me personally, I would definitely not be able to do it."
Guan Gu stared into her eyes and said seriously: "No, you are smart."
"No, it's your patience."
"No! You won't be able to catch someone else."
"I'd like to change the name. Let's call it—Death Pliers Claw Claw, how about it?"
"Why didn't I think of that? You're such a little genius."
"Guan Gu-jun, your mouth is so sweet."
The two talked to each other, and gradually approached, so close that they could clearly hear each other's heartbeat.Meijia closed her eyes and went to meet her, feeling that Guan Gu's breath was going to surround her. "Wait, it seems that someone is watching us?" Mika suddenly felt that something was wrong, Guan Gu comforted her by saying that there was no one.There was only a plate on the table with a live crayfish in it, watching the two tenderly kiss each other with open teeth and claws...
Meijia laughed out loud in her dream, rolled off the sofa drooling, and fell awake.It happened that Zhang Wei came in from the outside with a bag on his back and a law book and a notebook in his hand. When he saw it, he hurried over to help Mijia up, and asked her funnyly what she had just dreamed about and was so happy.
"I dreamed of Guan..." Mijia got up in a daze, yawned, and was about to say the word "Guan Gu", when she remembered the beauty in her dream, she blushed and quickly changed her words, "What does it matter to you?" ?”
Originally just asking casually, meddling in other's affairs, and simply saying a word, Meijia blushed immediately, Zhang Wei felt strange.What's even more strange is that when asked why she was blushing, Meijia was even more flustered, pouted, her face was as red as a high fever of 42 degrees, and she spoke incoherently: "You are sick, old lady, I...you can blush if you like...it's okay What to see..."
It may be because of the many lawsuits recently, Zhang Wei's reasoning ability is very improved, and he can smell the ambiguous smell with his feet. It must be that Meijia had a very unusual dream.Such gossip, how can we not tell each other.So, he immediately went to Yifei and Zeng Xiaoxian to share his experience.
"Meijia's blush is not the bright red of watermelon, nor the tender red of apple, nor the Sudan red of grilled chicken wings, but a very rippling... rippling red. So, according to my careful analysis, Meijia does It's a spring dream! ——and the object of her dream is likely to be someone we know." Zhang Wei said clearly.
Yifei interrupted him angrily: "Use your literacy in the lawsuit with Weiwei, Mrs. Xianglin! A crush on the goddess has become a competitor, and you and I have become a life and death, but you still have the mind to care about it." Other people's business. You can't guess what a girl is thinking!"
"It's not difficult, I've found the pattern." Seeing that the two people who had always been gossips were indifferent, Zhang Wei was a little surprised.
Yifei curled her lips: "Let's play. Why are you men so self-righteous, and when you really want to show some skills, you all wilt?"
The mood is so wrong, is the blind date not going well?Yifei's information is posted on the homepage, and there are only dozens of applicants who are tall, handsome and rich, and they are too busy!The point is, rich people are not necessarily creative, even the way of dating is the same - eat, drink;
Zhang Wei chuckled: "That's not very good, the food and beverages are all saved."
Yifei asked him: "Aren't you good at reasoning? Guess who I want to date?"
When Zeng Xiaoxian heard that Yifei's date was not going well, he was secretly happy, and a little more joking: "Don't make things difficult for Zhang Wei, he can only reason about girls' minds. You are different."
Yifei turned her head to look at him with a smile, but with a little force on her hand, she twisted a spoon out of its original shape.Seeing that the situation was not right, Zhang Wei and Zeng Xiaoxian both ran away.
2
Recently, the comic industry is not doing well. Guan Gu’s "Love Three-legged Cat" has been suspended by the magazine. The reason is ridiculous. It is said that in order to coincide with the release of "Avengers 2", the boss decided to temporarily insert a few issues of American hero comics. , said to be more appropriate. (Note: several issues = 200 issues)
If it was in the past, when one person was full and the whole family was not hungry, Guan Gu would certainly not worry.But now that he is getting married, he has to be responsible not only for himself, but also for Yoyo and their future. He has to face the reality and live a down-to-earth life.Continue to create, or get married and raise a family?Between dreams and reality, it seems that there is only one to choose.The income from drawing comics became more and more unstable, Guan Gu had no choice but to consider changing jobs.
Yoyo feels sorry for him, and can't bear to let him give up his comic business, but life must have a certain material foundation, daily necessities are very real economic problems.After discussing and discussing, it was decided to let Guan Gu find a part-time job first, so as not to delay the creation, but also to have income, killing two birds with one stone!As for what to do, the two found senior brother Du Jun, thinking that he would come up with a good idea after traveling all over the world and being well-informed.
It hasn't been a day or two since the manga industry has been in recession. The reason why the elder brother is able to be proud of the Jianghu and keep the sound of the waves is because of... his unparalleled professional strength and his unique status in the Jianghu?
"It's all because of me holding 18 part-time jobs at the same time... Otherwise, I would have starved to death." Du Jun said a word, and Guan Gu and Youyou were fooled, 18?Dare to love comics is a part-time job!
The part-time little prince, who can bear what others can't bear, behave what others can't do, and persevere, is a great weapon.
Part-time job [-]: Sit in an empty house that has just been renovated, take a deep breath, use the self-purification function of the human body, absorb as much formaldehyde gas as possible, and let customers move in as soon as possible. People call it a formaldehyde purifier.Although the difficulty of the job is low, there is no requirement for academic qualifications, height and appearance, and one hour of work a day, the income is not bad, but the injury index is too high, which is slightly equal to self-harm.
Part-time job [-]: get people's money, and get rid of disasters with people.It's not about gangsters killing people and getting more goods. The big brother's customers are not ordinary people, but Taobao sellers. His job is to ensure the positive ratings of customers and help him eliminate bad reviews.It doesn’t matter whether you have the wrong version, poor quality, wrong size, too slow delivery, or your mother is in a bad mood today. As soon as the bad review eliminators go out, put your face in the cabinet, hang your soul on the tree, cry poor, pretend to be pitiful, Hugging thighs, stalking, hard-working, no bottom line, no morals, no bad reviews that cannot be changed, and no crown that cannot be rushed.
……
The part-time job recommended by the big brother either ruins the body or sells the soul, which is really unreliable.In desperation, Guan Gu and Yoyo had to find everyone to discuss, hesitatingly and eagerly expressing that when dreams come true, they need to be down-to-earth.It would be great if you can find a suitable part-time job, not only to meet the expenses, but also to live up to the grace of love.
Everyone said in unison: "Speak human words!" Only then did Guan Gu and Youyou have to admit that they were poor recently, so they wanted to find a part-time job to support their family.
Everyone was trying to come up with ideas, only Meijia was distracted, Zeng Xiaoxian saw that she had a strange expression, and shouted a few times before she heard it, she was stunned for a long time, and suddenly became very enthusiastic "Hi".Zhang Wei saw Meijia's completely inexplicable reaction, which further confirmed his thoughts.
Zeng Xiaoxian didn't care, and asked him: "Guan Gu wants to find a part-time job, what's your opinion?"
Meijia's enthusiastic smile disappeared immediately, replaced by an embarrassed face, like a child who was caught doing something bad: "Me? You ask Yoyo about such an important thing, I'm not Guan Gu's girlfriend This is a private matter, I... how can I get involved. If my opinion destroys your loving life, then my sin will be serious. "
Don't you just want to hear everyone's opinions?Earning extra money is not looking for an affair, but it will also affect the relationship?Everyone is even more inexplicable.
Guan Gu thought she didn't understand, and explained it carefully: "Meijia, you have been my assistant before, so you should know me better. What do you think are my strengths?"
"Strengths?" Meijia looked as if someone had stepped on her tail, her face turned red, and she replied in a panic, "How do I know where you are?"
Guan Gu thought he said nothing wrong?What about Meijia's face... "Watermelon, apple, grilled chicken wings, Oh! No!" Zhang Wei booed and took out his phone to take a picture of Meijia.
"I...I'm so desperate to urinate!" Meijia found an excuse and ran away in a panic.
The evidence is solid, Meijia doesn't blush when she sees Teacher Zeng, she doesn't blush when she sees Zhang Wei, but she blushes when she sees Guan Gu and Youyou.Zhang Wei was very satisfied with his deduction, and he was even more proud when he looked at the photos on his phone, and then at Meijia.
Finally, the people dispersed, and they could watch TV quietly for a while, but Zhang Wei was looking at her wretchedly, Meijia felt uncomfortable all over, and couldn't help yelling at him: "Hey! Have you watched enough? I Do you have money on your face?"
Zhang Wei chuckled: "I don't have money, I have desires!"
Meijia was almost choked by him, and became even more angry: "I sprayed you to death with a mouthful of salt soda, and you still have pimples on your face!"
Zhang Wei showed her the photo on his phone. In the photo, Mika's face was as red as a cooked crayfish!According to criminal psychology, you think about it every day and dream at night.Mika’s blushing is a typical conditioned reflex, and it’s a strong self-suggestion in her subconscious, which can be covered up on the surface, but Zhang Wei went on to say: “For a reasoning expert like me, all of your things are just deception, and you can’t escape. My piercing eyes!"
He told Meijia what was on his mind, so he had no choice but to scold him: "Nonsense! I must have seen him too much recently to be like this. Don't pretend to be Bao Qingtian just because you have a scar on your forehead! You bloody nigger, big briquettes !A master of reasoning, push your dung ball away!"
"Do you dream of it if you see it too much?" Zhang Wei smiled maliciously, took out a photo of himself as a lawyer in a suit and handed it to Mika, "Please prove it! If you look at my... photo every day, you can also If you dream of me, then you win. If you fail, please take the initiative to surrender to my wisdom, don't deny it, you can't pretend to be blushing!"
What a show!Take photos with you!Looking at Zhang Wei's photo, Meijia gritted her teeth and agreed.
A few days later, Meijia really dozed off on the sofa again, dreaming.It was still the smoky room, it was still the doll fishing machine, it was still Guan Gu and her, fishing for dolls hand in hand.
Seeing that the biggest and most beautiful doll was caught again, Meijia shouted excitedly: "Ah! Ah! I caught it again."
Guan Gu looked at her dotingly: "Honey, why did you say 'again'? Just now you said it was the first time you played this game."
Meijia replied coquettishly: "I lied to you, but I am actually an expert."
"Nani?" Guan Gu seemed to have expected it a long time ago, stroking her hand ambiguously, "Then you teach me, hand in hand."
Meijia suddenly remembered that the last kiss was seen by a crayfish.Her secret must have been told by that crayfish, otherwise how would Zhang Wei know? "Wait a minute." Meijia hurried to the side and dumped the plate of crayfish on the table into the trash can, now it's safe.The two approached sweetly, holding hands...
Just being romantic, a huge crayfish suddenly crawled out from behind the sofa, no, it was a crayfish with a human face! "Ah! Zhang Wei!" Mika screamed in fright.
As soon as he opened his eyes, Zhang Wei sat beside him, salivating and asked, "Did you dream of me?" Mika was startled again, and subconsciously moved to the side, remembering the previous agreement, and said lightly, "Yes. ! My suspicion is cleared."
Then why doesn't Meijia blush when she sees herself?Listening to Mika's description, it turned out that in her dream she was just a crayfish?If you look closely, you can still vaguely recognize the human form?You're making a sci-fi movie!Wait, Meijia is not allergic to crayfish, how could she turn pale with fright when she sees a crayfish?There must be a conspiracy, and there must be ambiguities that have not been revealed! "Ah! It's Guan Gu, right?"
Meijia's face turned red again, and the composure she had just now disappeared, she lowered her head and denied it: "You promised, it will be fine if you dream of you, and I didn't say anything else."
"You still blushed when you dreamed of Guan Gu this time, but I'm actually a lobster. Doesn't that explain the problem?" Zhang Weiyue said more and more angrily, I am a big lawyer, and I am a shrimp in your dream?It's fine if you don't have a crush on me, and you don't have to spoil me like this, right?No, I have to give her a tough trick! "You're not afraid of Guan Gu, Yoyo knows?"
Meijia really panicked, and threatened: "If you dare to tell them, you will die, stinky briquettes!"
Okay, don't admit defeat and scold me! "Let's see!" Zhang Wei said and walked out.With a guilty conscience, Meijia chased after her.
3
Half of it is friendship, half is love... Zeng Xiaoxian was flipping through extreme sports magazines boredly, humming "Dilemma".Alas, Nuolan and Yifei, how did they get into the current situation in a daze!Ordinarily, Nuolan should be regarded as love, and Yifei should be regarded as friendship, but how far is the gap between love and friendship?It was just a momentary soft-heartedness, but the friendship with Nuo Lan turned into today's love.As for Yifei, if he had been a little braver back then, would he have owned her instead of being upset about her blind date now.well!
Someone knocked on the door, interrupting his cranky thoughts.When I opened the door, I saw a man with spectacles who was full of vibes, holding a handful of huge flowers, and asked with a smile on his face, "Excuse me, does Miss Hu Yifei live here?"
The person who came was Billy, one of Hu Yifei's many suitors.I have had a little communication on the Internet, but I haven't met in person yet, but I have a good impression of Hu Yifei, and I think she is a very, very special woman.So, I specially booked a seat for a French dinner this day, and came to treat her to dinner.
It happened that Hu Yifei was not here today, and Zeng Xiaoxian just sent him away and asked him to call the restaurant another day.
"I've bought the restaurant, and it's fine another day. But the chef was specially invited from France, and I'm still waiting." Billy thought about it, took out his phone and dialed: "Hey, let the cook go back to Paris first. Wait for my notice."
This posture, this style, Zeng Xiaoxian was taken aback: "This big brother, the rich second generation?"
Billy smiled modestly: "I'm not, my grandpa is."
Damn it, what dating site still has such high-end users?But why do high-end users take a fancy to Hu Yifei?Could it be that she is the only female user?In the past, just listening to her talk made her feel uncomfortable, but now that the suitor is standing in front of her alive, Zeng Xiaoxian is even more unhappy.no!Gotta find a way to break them up!With a certain idea, Zeng Xiaoxian laughed dryly and persuaded Billy, "Don't bother the French compatriots. Hu Yifei doesn't like blind dates and always eats, it's boring."
"Then I can watch a movie with her. I'll go to Buyer Cinema right away." Billy obviously misunderstood what he meant, and immediately started calling again.
Zeng Xiaoxian persuaded again: "Big brother, no, big brother! It's useless for you to buy a theater chain, it's not worth it." Who would have thought that Billy would fall in love with Yifei with all his heart, thinking that she was very appetizing, no matter how much money he spent. value.Money, money, money again, is it amazing to be rich?When dating a girl, you have to be special. Does spending money count as a special feature?Of course, spending like him should be considered "ruthless" and distinctive.
"Yifei is special, she...sees sincerity." Zeng Xiaoxian pondered, procrastinating to think of a solution, and happened to find a photo of bungee jumping in the magazine in his hand, and immediately continued happily, "For example, bungee jumping is good, dare you? "
Billy looked embarrassed, this... looked really taken aback.Zeng Xiaoxian's heart was more than half relaxed, and he was still embellishing: "Don't dare? How can it be considered sincerity? Yifei likes to take risks the most. If the date is not life-threatening, she will feel uncomfortable. How? Do you still think she is special? "It is said that if the IQ exceeds 120, it is easy to deal with the rich and handsome.Jump, you dance, blend into the blue sky, hahahaha!Zeng Xiaoxian couldn't help laughing smugly.
Who knows that the world is unpredictable, and the careless Billy is not only rich, but also courageous, so he really invites Yifei to go bungee jumping.With Yifei's personality, of course he had a lot of fun!Billy not only took a group photo, but also held Yifei's little hand, and sent out the group photo and the story of dating Yifei.This time, there was an uproar on Hu Yifei's blind date forum.Yes, you heard that right, because there are so many suitors, Blind Date.com specially set up a suitor forum for Hu Yifei, for everyone to understand Yifei's hobbies and interests, communicate and exchange, it is very popular!I have always heard that Yifei is an iceberg beauty, and many people can't even get an appointment, let alone take advantage of the beauty, but now Billy is able to win a confidant smile and make the iceberg start to melt. Obviously, there are experts behind him. !But who would have thought that the expert Zeng Xiaoxian originally wanted Billy to retreat in the face of difficulties so that they could be separated?
One day Zeng Xiaoxian was chatting at the bar, the waiter came over and said that there were some guests at the door who wanted to invite him to have a drink, and three men in suits raised their glasses as a gesture of gesture.But you don't know them?After hesitating for a moment, the stinky Zeng Xiaoxian immediately found a reason for himself, fans must be fans, it is definitely possible!So Shi Shiran walked over.
Who knew it was Yifei's suitor again, this time there was not just one, but three!Azhi, Ahao, and Ade all saw Hu Yifei on a dating website, and they were very interested in Yifei, but she didn't seem to accept their sincerity, and asked her out for dinner several times and refused to show respect.Later, Billy posted a photo of him and Yifei, and the three people got together. They wondered how Billy could come up with such a good idea of bungee jumping, so they were cruel, and asked Billy with 20 gold coins. Only then did I get the address of an expert, and I came here especially for the name.
Zeng Xiaoxian curled his lips: "Aren't they all tall, handsome and rich, and 20 forum coins are still used?"
"Ours are real gold coins." Ahao said shyly, as if having money is such a shameful thing.Embarrassed, Zeng Xiaoxian quickly turned his face away, pretending to say hello to an acquaintance.
Azhi asked: "May I ask, what is your relationship with Yifei? How do you know her so well?"
"Me?" Zeng Xiaoxian waved his arms excitedly, but he kept making gestures, but he really didn't know the relationship between him and Yifei, lover?Obviously not.friend?Even more wrong.With the current situation, he has nothing to do with Hu Yifei at all.The result of the analysis was so bleak, Zeng Xiaoxian was stunned for a long time before he came back to his senses, Lang smiled and said: "That's because I am a host of an emotional show. I understand girls' thoughts best."
The three of them couldn't guess what he was thinking, and they admired him so much that they all bowed to Zeng Xiaoxian: "Then please teach us how to date Yifei! Please!"
Zeng Xiaoxian declined: "No, no... this..."
The three of them said in unison again: "We give 50 gold coins!"
50 gold coins!Pure gold!Zeng Xiaoxian seemed to see the money floating in the sky, and forgot how to refuse.
Once spread to ten, ten to hundreds, Zeng Xiaoxian soon became the sweet potato in the hands of many suitors of a Philippine. I just hope that Zeng Dagao can give me some advice, so that I can kiss Fangze.
Ziqiao was puzzled, is Zeng Xiaoxian good at chasing Yifei?The TV series has been on for four seasons, and Zeng Xiaoxian has never even made a decent confession to Yifei, instead he went off track and chased after Nuolan, what can he teach him?Maybe successful people are too busy to have time to fall in love, so Zeng Xiaoxian said a few nonsense, and a group of out-of-stocks took it seriously.
With a good deal in front of him, Ziqiao decided to deeply develop Yifei's residual value and hold classes for suitors once a week at a reasonable fee.In view of the devotion and respect everyone has for Zeng Xiaoxian, he is the one who should give the lecturer.
"Me?!" Zeng Xiaoxian was taken aback by Qiao Hongwei's plan, "I have nothing to teach them, nor am I interested in teaching them!"
Zi Qiao tried on a new suit, looking around she was very handsome, she didn't take Zeng Xiaoxian's refusal seriously, and said casually: "Since you are so determined, I can only tell them, I, Teacher Lu, teach in person."
Zeng Xiaoxian pissed him off: "Why do you teach? You never chased Yifei!"
Ziqiao glanced at him disdainfully: "You're not the only one who knows Yifei, and this is my specialty."
Don't be afraid of being tall, rich, handsome and rich, but afraid of being tall, rich, handsome and smart!Lu Ziqiao went to teach, so what? !Professor Zeng weighed the pros and cons, and finally realized that whoever will go to hell will go to hell if I don't, and I will fight for Yifei not to be chased away!
4
Under the care of his elder brother Du Jun, Guan Gu finally found a somewhat reasonable part-time job, helping police comrades draw portraits of suspects.Of course, it's just a small police station, and the suspect's target is definitely not some gangster who murders and steals money. He just helps to draw a thief, pervert or something to help maintain law and order in the area.Being able to serve the community and have a little relationship with his major, Guan Gu is already very satisfied.
When the work started, Guan Gu was sitting upright with a sketchpad in his hands. Du Jun saw his serious look and couldn't help but sneered.Guan Gu thought that he had done something wrong to make the big brother look down on him, until he met the first person who reported the crime.
The first person to make a statement was a young girl.It is said that on the bus, a thief has been trying to trick her. "I remember he was wearing a gold Rolex watch from the Greenwich Oyster Perpetual series. His belt was Hermès' lychee pattern 3.8 universal type. The shoes were just average, Gucci's 2006 old model."
Xiao Meimei observed carefully enough, so let's talk about the suspect's appearance.
"Appearance? How can I remember that!" The girl shook her head blankly, "Oh, yes, the ring on his left middle finger is from the Cartier Trinity three-color gold series."
Guan Gu widened his eyes and asked: "That man is so rich, are you sure he is a thief?"
The girl nodded very positively: "Of course! From the moment he got in the car, he rubbed against my back! He must be trying to steal my bag, so I hugged it desperately, and he could only rub against my leg. For more than an hour, I didn't let go of him until he was out of breath!"
Guan Gu and Du Jun looked at each other, deeply worried about Meimei's IQ, but what to paint after worrying?Is it a Rolex gold watch, or a Hermès belt?Guan Gu's hand holding the paintbrush froze.
The second is a Korean man.As soon as he came in, he beat his chest and stamped his feet, danced and slapped out Korean words: "My car was broken into, and my computer was lost. Sir, you must help me catch the thief and get the computer back. The photos inside are very important to me. If it leaks out, the consequences will be unimaginable, and my girlfriend will definitely hate me..."
"Sir, please speak Mandarin?" Guan Gu reminded him politely.
"I speak Korean Mandarin. What should I do? I'm so anxious! I feel like I'm going to explode!" The Korean male contestant drew an explosion gesture. Du Jun immediately understood and told Guan Gu that he seemed to say that the suspect was an explosion. head.Still gesturing to confirm with others, right, Smecta?
The man nodded again and again: "Yes, it's the feeling of going to explode, Smecta, I have been with my girlfriend for five years, and I have survived the car accident, amnesia and leukemia. You must help me this time..."
I can help you, but I watched a whole episode of the Korean drama, and the suspect didn't show up, Brother Smecta?Guan Gu turned the pen holder boredly, but still couldn't write.
The third place is a hawker who sells chicken in the vegetable market.This is good, I don't speak a foreign language, but... a gorgeous local dialect!Of course, for Guan Gu, who has lived in China for several years, language communication is not a problem, so please describe what happened carefully and specifically.
"I was selling chickens at the vegetable market this morning. A Korean man was chasing a thief and passing by. I went to watch the excitement. When I came back, I found that one chicken was missing! The one I lost was silky chicken, an authentic domestic chicken, 38 It walks like this.” The peddler’s description was really specific, he clucked like a hen and walked like a hen at the same time...
Seeing Guan Gu stunned, the peddler urged: "Hey? Why don't you draw?" Uncle, do you want us to draw a thief or your silky chicken?
Thankfully, the fourth is finally here.As soon as the aunt came up, she went straight to the topic: "The guy who cheated me of money looks very special - triangular eyes and beard, protruding ears and sausage mouth, oh, and there is such a long scar on his face, it's scary! "
With such a scary appearance, how can he still deceive people?Guan Gu's brain is a bit insufficient, and he still can't draw.Du Jun reminded from the side: "Let's draw. All the handsome ones are going to act in idol dramas, and who will be a liar!"
Combining all kinds of confessions, Guan Gu finally drew an ugly monster with an afro head, triangular eyes, beard, protruding ears, sausage mouth, and a huge knife scar.Du Jun comforted him, although there were some obstacles, it was also rewarding.But Guan Gu's heart, eager to serve the people and uphold justice, suddenly fell to the bottom.
After being completely disappointed with the big brother, Guan Gu moved to 58.com again. I really thought that "Yang Mi" had done a few advertisements, and that's where the job was found?In addition to the full screen of online part-time jobs and Taobao stores, there is only one left: extras - Japanese soldiers, daily salary, settlement on the day, and box lunch.
Youyou doesn't understand, Guan Gu is now in a hurry to go to the doctor, even willing to be an actor, why is he not willing to be an art teacher?
Guan Gu's explanation is, "I don't want to teach, I was born for creation." But go to the crew to play tricks, does this have something to do with creation?Guan Gu said again, "It doesn't matter much, but at least it won't be so uncomfortable if you change your line of work." Looking into it carefully, the reason why Guan Gu rejects becoming an art teacher is because he equates being a teacher with the failure of his own comic business. A profession related to art, but it feels like it has dropped several grades.Youyou saw through his mind, sat next to him, smiled and enlightened him: "Guan Gu, it's nothing, just look around and say I'm fine, I was born for acting, the result is; A TV presenter, now; and Zhang Wei, just meet any opponent, sharpen his head and insist on becoming a lawyer. Everyone has ideals and pursuits, but no one can reach the sky in one step, and they have to take their time. Sometimes A compromise does not mean failure, maybe an opportunity is just around the corner.”
Guan Gu was a little moved by her words, and asked hesitantly: "Do you really think I should be a teacher?"
Youyou nodded and encouraged him: "Try it, at least being a teacher will not affect your health, dignity, or IQ, and it's very meaningful."
Guan Gu shook his head, and sighed again: "I don't want to hurt anyone. I studied painting for so long, and now I'm still looking for a part-time job."
"But those children you teach may be luckier than you. They will meet a more responsible and far-sighted teacher. Teacher Guan Gu will definitely not let this kind of embarrassment happen again!" Youyou smiled, looking at the little girl in front of her. A man who is at a loss like a child, "If your students will succeed in their studies in the future and don't need to find a part-time job, wouldn't that be the greatest success for you?"
Teacher Guan Gu, this title sounds pretty good.Coupled with the scene painted by Yoyo, Guan Gu suddenly felt that his image was much taller.Just as he was thinking, Zhang Wei and Meijia ran in noisyly back and forth. "I said it!" "Say it!" "I really said it!" "Say it if you have the ability!" The two chattered, not knowing what they were arguing about.
Zhang Wei cleared his throat and announced with a smirk on his face, "You two, I have important news to tell you!"
"Shut up, you big briquette!" Mika, who was fearless just now, suddenly rushed forward, tightly covered Zhang Wei's mouth, and explained to Guan Gu and Yoyo: "He has bad breath, it's time to rinse his mouth!"
Guan Gu said happily: "Actually, I also have important news to tell you, I plan to become an art teacher!"
Meijia was happy for him, congratulations to him for finally figuring it out, and some vague voices leaked from Zhang Wei's covered mouth, which was incomprehensible.
"I'm going to apply for the job tomorrow, wish me success!" After saying that, Guan Gu went over to hug the two of them.Meijia dodged in embarrassment, and continued to cover Zhang Wei's mouth to prevent him from speaking: "Don't come here! As long as you have Yoyo's support, I... just came to find Zhang Wei."
Youyou felt strange, and asked her what was wrong, Zhang Wei pushed Mika's hand away vigorously, and shouted triumphantly: "I know!"
"I said it myself!" Meijia rushed ahead of him, lowered her head, as if confessing, "I... I had a dream. Yoyo, I was wrong, I dreamed about Guan Gu. In the dream, Guan Gu and I Alone... playing with the claw machine, very intimate, and was seen by a crayfish... twice."
"The second lobster is actually me!" Zhang Wei interjected uncontrollably.
"Don't worry, Yoyo, I won't destroy your relationship. I..." Meijia pursed her lips, so anxious that tears were about to fall.Youyou thought it was funny, and comforted her softly: "Meijia, it's just a dream, it doesn't mean you have anything to do with Guan Gu. Maybe, what you fell in love with is claw machine fishing, or crayfish. Didn't these happen several times? It's also possible that you were just moved by the picture we described that day, and you also long for this kind of intimate feeling of love?"
"I got it, I got it!" Zhang Wei couldn't help interjecting meanly again, "You mean, Mika has been single for too long, she's hungry?!" Of course, before she finished speaking, Mika pinched her again and again. screw.
"Let's do an experiment. At this very moment, are you calling Guan Gu?" Yoyo pointed at Guan Gu, who looked like a slovenly homeboy.Meijia took a closer look and shook her head decisively.Yoyo smiled and concluded: "Then it's all right!"
Meijia jumped up excitedly, and the guilt and self-blame of the past few days was swept away: "It's great, I didn't fall in love with Guan Gu!"
"Hey! It's not fair, I'll go change clothes." The stubborn Guan Gu wanted to save some face, but Yoyo gave him a hard look, and comforted Mika with a smile: "You're fine, you're just feeling hot, no In heat, don't be angry...I mean, it's time for you to find a man to fall in love with."
"A man? Hey, I'm a man too." Zhang Wei puffed up his chest, trying his best to make his image a bit more majestic.Meijia glanced at him and commented coldly: "You are not, crayfish!"
5
In the first lecture of "Basic Introduction to Dating Hu Yifei", 14 classmates came. Xiaoxian was in class and Ziqiao was teaching assistant.
"As we all know, Hu Yifei, a female doctor born in the year of dog and born under the sign of Leo, is a complex and rare creature. What exactly does she need in her heart? This is a science." As soon as he said a few words, all the young people in the audience chattered. Desperately taking notes; some people shouted, the teacher's opening remarks are so good!Zeng Xiaoxian stayed for a while, saying that someone listened to all this?You rich second generations are really endangered high-risk creatures!But some people praised him, after all, he still feels good about himself, and he soon began to feel a little bit like a "beast".
"Okay! Let's interpret Hu Yifei's various expressions today." Zeng Xiaoxian signaled to Ziqiao, and Ziqiao opened the first PPT file - a photo wall composed of Hu Yifei's various expressions, facing the goddess' various demeanors, Everyone was naturally amazed, and they became more motivated to learn. "Among all expressions, smiles are the most common and the most connotative. As long as you can understand Yifei's various smiles, you can take the initiative in dating."
first slide!On weekdays, they face each other day and night, and suddenly saw Yifei's high-definition photo magnified N times, Zeng Xiaoxian's heart skipped a beat.Slender and soft eyebrows, gentle and amiable eyes, straight but playful round nose, moist and beautiful lips like flowers, standard oval face with a pointed chin, a little fleshy face, a little more disgusting Fat, a little less layering is not enough, just such a good arc makes the whole face vivid and natural.
"She looks very happy!" commented a classmate.Zeng Xiaoxian came back to his senses and licked his lips: "Wrong! At first glance, she is smiling happily, but please observe carefully, the lines of her mouth are a bit stiff, and her eyes are not flexible enough. This is a typical forced smile! It shows your She is not interested in the topic at all, she just cooperates politely and suggests that you better change the topic."
Wow, the Chinese version of Professor Cal Lightman!The students' admiration for Professor Zeng suddenly flooded into page after page of notes like a torrential river, for fear of missing a word of excellence.
The second one, laugh out loud, this one must be happy!Girls pay attention to smiling without showing their teeth, Yifei opened his mouth and laughed, he was a bit carried away! "Wrong again! Please note that this time Yifei smiled with her eyes closed, but we can infer that if her eyes are open now, the direction of her gaze is upward, that is to say, she is not looking at You. Or we can interpret it as she rolled her eyes at you with her eyes closed. This is a sarcastic mockery! Often accompanied by a sharp drawl and looking at you through her nostrils. Don’t be complacent, because the next One word, she will make you want to cry."
Thinking of Yifei's cynicism to him, Zeng Xiaoxian unconsciously twisted the corner of his mouth, and Ziqiao next to him suddenly laughed non-stop.Zeng Xiaoxian yelled at him angrily: "Classroom discipline! Next one!"
The third one, with a toothless smile, looks like he is yawning. "If you think this is a signal to send her home, then you can really go home. What is Hu Yifei? Leo! Queen! The queen will not hide her ridicule, dissatisfaction, and anger at you, but she does not She likes to expose her true thoughts in front of others, which is why she covers her mouth at this time. But we can see from her eyes and eyebrows that there is no exaggeration, which shows that she is currently in a state of complete relaxation, and her eyes are soft. It's a sign of acceptance. It's the only time she's actually smiling. If you see that, congratulations, you made her laugh."
"Yes!" Ah Hao from the audience suddenly shouted excitedly, lowered his voice but still said to his tablemate in a very embarrassing manner: "The last time I invited Yifei to dinner, she kept doing this for a long time. I have something to play."
Zi Qiao sneered: "That's because this classmate has body odor, next one!"
The fourth photo, with a cold smile, Yifei in the photo is noble and glamorous, completely like a goddess!But don't overlook a very important detail, the devil is hidden in the details, her fingers are exerting force, and the spoon in her hand has been twisted and bent. "Look carefully at her eyes, is she staying in the same direction? But her eyes are not the dullness we said before when she was bored, but the signal that the alarm device in her body started to lock the target! Of course, when Yifei's hand When something on the screen is deformed, the expression is no longer important, which means that you have caused trouble. Then, after two seconds, you will see the following screen."
Ziqiao turned the page and accidentally released a beautiful woman with big breasts. The audience was in an uproar, and Zeng Xiaoxian coughed from choking.Dong dong dong, cutting three photos in a row, Yifei opened her almond eyes, raised her eyebrows, clenched her fists, and gritted her teeth, completely in an attack state.
"When you see the following expressions—" Zeng Xiaoxian urged earnestly, "Run! Run quickly! Don't—turn around and take pictures!" Everyone trembled in fright, and after shaking, they frantically took notes.
Under the training of Zeng Xiaoxian and Lu Ziqiao, Yifei's blind dates became more and more harmonious, and those boys who chased her seemed to suddenly become enlightened, and they seemed to have become more sensible overnight.The topic is over, and the date is no longer boring.When I was thirsty, the water was delivered before I reached out; when I was sleepy, I sent her home before I yawned.Therefore, Yifei's mood is getting better and better, and the sun is shining and the wind is beautiful all over the world.
"Could it be that God is hinting at me? Tell me, should I consider choosing someone for a formal relationship?" During the chat, Yifei asked Zeng Xiaoxian for his opinion.
Zeng Xiaoxian really couldn't think of any reason to stop her, so he was anxious, so he could only perfunctorily say: "Don't be so impulsive, let's see."
Is this a kind of retention?Yifei's heart moved a bit, but when she thought of Nuolan, she suddenly lost her courage, forced a smile, and pretended to be generous and said: "Almost, since these guys have good hardware and software, I can't keep hanging on them. Forget about Nuolan's concern."
Zeng Xiaoxian couldn't figure it out.Nolan?What could be on her mind?Yifei looked at him and sighed in her heart, how could she fall in love with such a fool!Leave a faint sentence: "You don't understand."
As soon as Yifei turned around and left, Zeng Xiaoxian anxiously went to Lu Ziqiao to settle accounts. If it wasn't for his bad idea of holding a training class, how could those suitors get close to her?Now Yifei said that he would randomly pick any applicant to be her boyfriend within three days, which was simply too hasty!He was sloppy, look at his life now!Aggrieved, too aggrieved!
"That's great. After you teach the basic class, you can start the practical class. The longer they get along, the longer we will have to worry about food and drink!" Lu Ziqiao didn't care, "Why don't we be responsible for our friends? Provide the results of the quiz to Yifei so that she can have a reference for her choice?"
Zeng Xiaoxian was stunned: "When did we have an in-class quiz?"
Ziqiao smiled and said, "I'm a teaching assistant after all? After you finish class, I will keep them and check the effect of the lectures. There are a few top-notch ones."
Zeng Xiaoxian was furious: "Can this count? They are simply cheating. If I hadn't told them the tricks, they would have been able to get within one foot and three feet?!"
"Isn't this the purpose of our school? You also accepted the gift and the PPT, and now you want to regret it?" Ziqiao patted him on the shoulder and persuaded, "Mr. Zeng, just be responsible to Nuolan Already, a man who picks a man, you earn your extra money. Do you need to be so excited?"
"Who... who said that I was excited?!" Zeng Xiaoxian let himself suffer, his eyes were scattered and his eyebrows were trembling with anger.
So far, the only way to stop the enemy outside the blockade is to tell the students about the dangers of dating Hu Yifei, which can scare those who have never seen the world to death!
"Everyone knows that Hu Yifei is a female doctor, a black belt in Taekwondo, and a tennis master. Is this series of titles a coincidence? Absolutely not! Yifei has a weird temper, is moody, and has a strong competitive spirit. If you lose to her, She will think you are useless; if you win her, then she will win two games with you, three games in five games, four games in seven games, until she defeats you, and then... think you are useless!"
"Of course, as a woman, there will always be times when she is lost and vulnerable. She will also be confused sometimes. Once she feels frustrated, she will find a place to hide herself. If you can't find her, you will be worried; if When you find her, you will be more worried—because she will often vent her anger by competing with you, as for the result of the competition, please refer to the previous article."
"Finally, and most importantly, if any of you have the misfortune to date her, please don't hold her hand. Because she knows ninjutsu—flick."
Why did the wind direction of the technical indicators analyzed by the teacher suddenly change?The students were in an uproar and whispered to each other.
Ade raised his hand and asked, "Teacher, how can you count as a relationship if you don't hold hands?"
Zeng Xiaoxian asked solemnly: "Is relationship more important or life more important?"
Billy said: "I held her hand once while bungee jumping, isn't that scary?"
Zeng Xiaoxian was stunned, and the students in the audience immediately mobbed, "Teacher, have you ever held her hand?" "Teacher, why do you always speak ill of Xiao Feifei today?"
"Xiao Feifei? Is that your name!" Zeng Xiaoxian was irritated for no reason.Billy replied innocently: "You didn't say it yourself. When she is unhappy, should you call her that?"
"You, you, you... stand up for me!" Zeng Xiaoxian was visibly excited again, and with a flick of his finger when pointing people, five students stood up.Pressed down four irritably, and asked Billy alone: "Quiz in class! Why is Mao Yifei surnamed Hu, but his younger brother Zhanbo's surname is Lu?"
Billy said confidently: "Because they are a reorganized family." Zi Qiao nodded and answered correctly!
Zeng Xiaoxian asked again: "What is Yifei's worst but favorite thing to do?"
"Make a cake, and Ficky." The answer is correct again!
"Explain why she got a doctorate?"
"Because a tough life can't be explained." Billy answered with his head held high, with a hint of toughness in his air, it must be correct!
Zeng Xiaoxian was a little at a loss for words, and threw out his trump card: "What is Yifei's greatest ideal? What kind of man is that?"
"Her greatest ideal is to have a man tell her what her real ideal is! That man is either smarter or stronger than her, otherwise why should he conquer her?" Billy clenched his fists to himself Come on, "I will work hard!"
correct answer!Zi Qiao gave him a heartfelt thumbs up.
It's not that we didn't work hard, it's because the enemy is too tough!Zeng Xiaoxian took a breath and said in frustration: "It seems that I have nothing more to teach you. From today onwards, you have all graduated, so go your own way. Remember, treat Yifei well."
"I have a problem!" Suddenly, Yifei appeared behind Zeng Xiaoxian.Zeng Xiaoxian looked back when he heard the sound, his face changed with fright.Zi Qiao leaned over and quickly stepped aside when he saw that the momentum was not right.
"The teacher said that when you have this expression, you should..." Ade reminded everyone that everyone yelled "Run!"Billy only felt that his legs were weak and he couldn't move, so he simply stood still.It turned out that Billy, who was careless, asked his classmates if they wanted to copy notes. When sending a group text message, he sent it to the wrong person and sent it to Hu Yifei.
"Aren't you two bored like fossils, and you actually train here?!" Yifei scanned the audience coldly, and found a girl in the corner: "Who is this girl? She also came to my blind date? "
Ah Hao smiled and explained: "She is my girlfriend, she came to listen."
"Girlfriend?" Zeng Xiaoxian was really surprised by their IQ.
"I didn't have a girlfriend at first, but after two classes, I found that I was probably useless, so I found a girlfriend." Ahao nodded embarrassedly, "I have spent all the money, so I have to get the certificate Bar."
"All—give—me—get out!" Yifei gritted her teeth, and issued the order to evict the guest word by word.Zi Qiao and the others took the opportunity to run out, only Zeng Xiaoxian who was dumbfounded and Billy who couldn't run were left.
Seeing Yifei's furious look, Zeng Xiaoxian said in a low voice, "It's you who complained that these people are not creative."
"It's none of your business, if you want you to go to extra lengths to help me sell, do you really want me to find a boyfriend quickly?" Yi Fei pouted at him unceremoniously.
"He's a good teacher," Billy interjected ignorantly.
"Who's talking?" Yifei just treated him as air.
"Don't worry, I'll take care of it." Billy winked at Zeng Xiaoxian, and called Yifei with a straight face: "——Feifei, little Feifei, Feifeifeifeifei..."
Yifei turned his head, his eyes emitted rays, and Billy instantly disappeared, Zeng Xiaoxian couldn't bear to cover his eyes.
"My surname is Zeng! You don't learn so many weapons in China, you prefer to learn the sword, the upper sword does not practice the lower sword, and the iron sword does not practice the silver sword! Congratulations, you have finally reached the realm of the unity of human and sword - sword man. I I haven’t gotten to know you well enough to allow you to show off my privacy in front of outsiders, let alone say bad things about me! It’s you who are the most immature, boring, and stupid! Don’t think you know me very well. It's far away, who are you!" Yifei felt his heart was empty after finishing his long speech, and his eyes started to feel a little sour when he stared at him.Zeng Xiaoxian, haven't you hurt me enough?
"Starting today, we will break off our relationship!" Yifei gave the ultimatum slowly but firmly, and slammed the door and left.In the empty classroom, only Zeng Xiaoxian was left standing there, and Yifei's sad eyes seemed to stab a knife in his heart, and the pain grew deeper and deeper.
6
It was late at night, Zhang Wei was wrapped in the quilt, his eyes rolled, and he smiled ambiguously, obviously dreaming.
In the dream, surrounded by smoke, there is a magical claw fishing machine in the middle of the room! "Ah! Ah! Yes!" Zhang Wei shouted excitedly after catching another doll.Guan Gu stared at him with a doting smile on his face: "Sorry! You are a genius!"
Zhang Wei glanced at him coquettishly: "You teach well."
Guan Gu's eyes became more intense: "No, it's you who are smart."
Zhang Wei tilted his head and acted cutely: "Then let's catch another... I want that crayfish!"
"No problem!" Guan Gu approached and held Zhang Wei's hands. Zhang Wei raised his head slightly, his eyes were full of happiness and satisfaction...
Halfway through the dream, Zhang Wei suddenly woke up. Recalling the scene in the dream, he couldn't help but widen his eyes and growled in despair: "Oh, No..."
(End of this chapter)
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