The world is so bad, so lucky to meet you

Chapter 9 Why Do You Always Meet Scumbags
There are many girls in my writings, some of them are good traditional girls who are thrifty, housekeepers, can cook well, keep the house tidy and clean, and take care of their own lives properly.Some are good girls in the new era, not afraid of hard work, and always work hard like men, all the way from low positions to management, they buy houses and cars by themselves, and honor their parents.

Whether they are traditional or new age, they are undoubtedly good girls.It is these good girls who live pretty well in life, but they are chronically unhappy emotionally.These good girls, they grew up all the way, met one scumbag after another along the way, and hurt themselves all over the way.

Why are you always so unlucky to meet scumbags?
Is it your fate?Did you do it?Perhaps these are not the main reasons.

I think it's mainly due to the following reasons:

1
You love frankly and deeply.

A good girl with a simple mind, very clear about love and hate, not ambiguous with others, not fraternal, will tell the truth if she doesn't like it, will not think about saving a bunch of spare tires for herself, if you like someone, you really like it, very frankly, no Deliberately reserved, and don't know how to keep some points for themselves.

If you love someone, you must have him. You are determined, simple and straightforward enough for the other person to see through at a glance. He feels that the overall situation has been settled and is easy to control, so he doesn't need to bother to manage it.Love without challenges is tasteless.

Many good girls are defeated by loving someone too much, while "bad girls" always love themselves the most. She is waiting to be loved and pampered, and don't provoke people who can't be pampered.

2
You don't expect anything in return, and you always naively think that you will be rewarded.

A good girl who is easy to meet scumbags usually doesn’t pay much attention to a man’s qualifications, whether it’s a handsome man who spends a lot of money in the rich generation or the second generation, or a gentle and considerate economical man who can cook at home, or a poor family A phoenix man with countless brothers and sisters, no good girl will envy or dislike him, as long as he likes it, he will accept all the good and bad.

Such a good girl doesn't have much concept of happiness in her heart.If the conditions are better, then live well.If the conditions are worse, then work hard to earn money with the one you love. It’s okay to lower the standard of living. It’s okay to subsidize your lover yourself. Overtime, business trips, staying up late, the pressure is so great that the aunt is not normal, and the harder it is, the more tired it is They all think it's worth it, as long as the one you love is still by your side, all hardships and hardships can be borne together.They always think that if they devote themselves wholeheartedly, there will naturally be a better life after the storm.

But as I walked, I finally realized that you might be the only one who worked hard. Not only did he not care, but he was also sarcastic.Just because you give willingly and without complaint, let that person feel that your dedication, understanding, and kindness to him are all taken for granted.

When your giving becomes a habit, if you stop one day, it is your fault.This feeling is like you give someone a candy every day. If you don't give him one day, he will think you are bad.

And bad girls always have to pay back, they don't do stupid things that are thankless, and scumbags can't cheat them.

3
You have soft ears and are easy to talk.

Good girls are very soft-hearted, small mistakes are big mistakes, as long as he seems to repent and talk sweetly, the girl will easily forgive him.

He flirted with girls, he cheated, he had a room with someone else, you accidentally found out, pretended to delete the other party's information, confessed in front of you, and swore a few poisonous oaths to the sky, you couldn't stand it , Looking at his sincere eyes, I forgave him.

He gambled outside, lost all his underwear, and owed tens of thousands of dollars. When he came back, he wrote a letter of guarantee, cried and put on a good show, and you felt that he really changed his past and showed himself The deposit helped him repay the debt and forgave him.

Get into a fight, he beats your mother so much that she doesn't even know you, and you're put in the hospital.He knelt down and begged you, saying he was in a bad mood, so why bother with him.You just believe it, feel that you are not good, you are so strong, and you forced him to make a mistake, so you forgive him.

But what happened afterwards was that when he turned around, he added those girls. The day after you paid him back, he went out to gamble again. The next time he quarrels, he still has to fight, and he still has to admit his mistake after the fight...

The good girl's ears are so soft, and she struggles repeatedly in the deception and betrayal again and again, repeatedly getting angry, despairing, giving up and forgiving him.

And the bad girl doesn't give the scumbag a chance to hurt herself at all. With these signs, she has long been hiding away.

4
You are embarrassed and value other people's feelings.

Good girls have thin skins, and they are too embarrassed to speak out when they encounter things they don't like. They will only persuade themselves to endure it, but instead spoil the other party and make the other party make mistakes again and again.

Things I obviously didn’t want to do, I reluctantly went with him because I was too embarrassed to refuse; places I didn’t want to go, because I was afraid the other party would be unhappy, so I went with him; wine I didn’t want to drink, because I was afraid of hurting the other party’s face I drank it; I obviously didn't want to have physical contact with the other party, because I was afraid that the other party would think too much, so I followed the other party's wishes; I obviously wanted to break up, but I couldn't say it because I was afraid that the other party would be sad; I obviously didn't want to marry him, because I was afraid that my parents would be sad , I forced myself to marry him.

Even his indifference, his cheating, his domestic violence, and his desire to divorce are all because he is afraid that his parents will not be able to withstand changes, gossip, and children will not be affected by his father's love, so he has been silently begging for perfection.If you are afraid of the sky and the earth, you are not afraid of being sad and crying every night.

And a bad girl is not afraid of the sky or the earth, she is only afraid that she is not happy enough, as long as he dares to be scumbag, she will quickly stop the loss and get out of the way.

5
You have a virgin heart, even if you are wrong, you are persistent.

When a good girl sees a problem, she doesn't think about whether the two are suitable or not. Instead, she has a heart of the Virgin to save the lost lambs. She always feels that she will correct those shortcomings, and she always loves wrongly and becomes persistent.

If he is not close to you, you can say that it will be fine if you have a deep relationship after a long time; if he treats you badly, you comfort yourself that maybe he is naturally indifferent and will change in the future; if he can’t take responsibility, you think it will be fine after you get married , It’s not enough to get married, but it will be fine after giving birth to a child; he doesn’t earn money, so you have to pay for it, and you say maybe he’s just frustrated for a while, and he’ll get rich later...

Well, you keep feeling maddened, and you always feel that these things will change after being together for a long time, after getting married, and after giving birth to children.You are naive again, thinking that people who are not good enough will always become good people, but it turned out that only a few changed, and most of them became worse.

If it was a bad girl, she would have tossed her hair a long time ago, turned around and left gracefully, she wouldn't have to bear it any longer, she wouldn't have suffered so much.

It is precisely because of the above characteristics that you are repeatedly entangled in one wrong relationship after another, you can’t afford it, you can’t save yourself, you don’t want to save yourself, so that unkind men can take advantage of it, bully and bully.

The "bad" girls I'm talking about are not really bad, they just know how to protect themselves and care more about their own feelings. They may be defined as "bad" girls by some people who don't take advantage of them.It's not that they can't meet a scumbag, it's that they have bright eyes and a clear heart, and they retreat without hesitation when encountering them. It's not his turn to abuse them!

The spirit of suffering together is precious, and the days of suffering together are the good memories and wealth in life, but suffering is not the purpose of life, no one has to accompany others to endure hardship, it is definitely not possible to let you be a cow and a horse without feeling sorry The entrusted person, don't waste your "good".

There is only one kind of man who is worthy of you to accompany him to overcome difficulties, that is, someone who loves you and loves you. No matter what his condition is, he is reluctant to let you suffer with him from the bottom of his heart. He is willing to work hard for you, endure hardships, know how to respect, A man who knows how to be grateful.Only such a man is worthy of your life.

It is human nature not to want to suffer, and a good girl who is willing to stay with and support a man's growth deserves to be cherished by better people.

Good girl, if your kindness is used by him to hurt yourself, then you should be a "cruel" bad girl!

(End of this chapter)