dead souls, imperial envoy

Chapter 61 Nose (4)
Kovalev said: "You really don't feel pain in your back when you stand and talk! You don't even have a nose, how can I make do with it? The current situation is already the worst, how could it be worse? I am now What's the deal with being weird? How can I go out and embarrass myself with a face like that? You know, my friends are all very famous. For example, today alone, two of them invited me to a party I am acquainted with many high-ranking people, such as the wife of the school officer, Paragya Grigoryevna Podtchenna, and the wife of the fifth-class civil servant, Chekhatalyova, etc. Wait. But the next time I see Podtchenna will be at the police station, who made me look like this! I beg you," Kovalev said in a very sincere tone, "be sure to To help me put my nose back in place, any method will do. Actually as long as you can hold it in place, I don't mind if it's not that strong. If it tends to fall off, I need you Reaching out and holding it is no problem. You don't have to be afraid that I'll screw this up because I can't even dance. Other than that, I'll do everything I can to get you covered for this visit. If you are satisfied, you don't have to worry about this matter."

The doctor said calmly: "Money is not the purpose of my practice of medicine. You must believe this. Because my medical skills and the principles of my practice and life do not allow me to do this. Of course, I will also charge some fees to patients. But , I only do this because I don't want the patient to be upset that I don't get a penny. It's not a problem for me to put your nose back in place. But I must warn you beforehand that if you do, It's only going to make things worse for you. I'm willing to put my reputation on the line so that you won't be skeptical about it. So, I hope you keep it that way. Honestly, it doesn't matter There is no harm to your health if you have a nose or not, as long as you wash the skin where your nose used to be with cold water often. In addition, I suggest you find a bottle for your nose and put it in the bottle. Full of alcohol, of course, it would be nice to add two spoons of vinegar and wine. This kind of thing costs a lot of money, and then you can get a windfall with this. If you It’s not very expensive, so I have the intention to buy it.”

Kovalev cried out in despair: "No! No! I'd rather throw it away than sell it!"

The doctor was about to leave soon, and he said, "I'm really sorry, I really want to help you. As you can see, I did try my best, but there is nothing I can do!" Then he left .Kovalev was so delirious that he could see nothing, not even the doctor's face, except for the black tailcoat the doctor was wearing and the white shirt sleeves protruding from the cuffs.

The next day, he planned to submit the complaint.But before that, he first wrote a letter to the school officer's wife, asking her if she had any intention of keeping the matter private and returning the thing to Zhao, after all, it belonged to him in the first place.The content of the letter is as follows:
Dear Mrs. Grigoryevna:
I can't understand what my wife is doing.However, I can be sure that my wife's behavior does not force me to accept Ling Qianjin and marry her.In fact, my wife got nothing by doing this.Now I know what happened to my nose.I have also established that the only one who planned this matter is my wife.It was my wife, or a witch at her behest, who had conjured up my nose and snapped it away from me, and turned it into an official and back again.I feel it is my duty to declare to my wife that if she cannot restore my nose to its original state within today, then I will have to resort to legal recourse.

Your humble squire Pradon Kovalev

The reply from the Colonel's wife is as follows:
Dear Mr. Pradon Kovalev:

I was very surprised to read your letter.Unexpectedly, my husband put all the blame on me and made such a severe accusation against me, which is simply too unfair!You might as well tell sir that neither the nose you mentioned in your letter, nor the official that the nose turned into, has anything to do with me, that's the truth.Besides, I once entertained a gentleman named Philip Ivanovich Botanchekhov at my house.This gentleman sincerely wanted to marry my daughter, but despite his integrity and learning, I still refused.You keep talking about your nose in your letter, and you express your distaste for marrying your little girl between the lines, which is equivalent to justly refusing this marriage.What you mean is really beyond my comprehension.My thoughts are exactly the opposite of yours, sir. I have always hoped that you would marry my daughter, and you know this very well, sir.I hope you will be satisfied with my reply.I'm on call if needed.

Sincerely, Grigoryevna

After reading the letter, Kovalev said: "It seems that I have wrongly blamed her. The instigator of this incident must not be her! If a person really committed such a crime, how can he still be used?" How about writing letters in such a tone?” Thinking back, when Kovalev was still in the Caucasus region, he had repeatedly received orders from his superiors to investigate cases.So in this regard, he is still very confident in himself.His hand drooped, and he said, "Well, how did this happen? What is the cause? Why am I so unlucky? Who can figure it out?"

This unbelievable strange thing soon spread throughout the city.The wider the spread, the more embellishment there is, as is the case with all rumors.In this day and age, who doesn't have a strong curiosity?All the citizens had just developed a strong interest in the magnetic experiment, and there was a fresh anecdote that the chairs on a certain street could dance.Now, everyone heard that the nose of the eighth-rank civil servant Kovalev actually walked on Neva Avenue by himself, and it did so every afternoon at three o'clock.Obviously, this matter is not so surprising to the citizens.Still, a bunch of meddling fellows gather all day long on Neva Boulevard, waiting to enjoy the spectacle.One guy claims that noses are in the Yongkel shop right now.Immediately, a group of people crowded around Yongkaier.As a last resort, the police had to come to maintain law and order.There was a speculator, bearded and handsome, who peddled cakes in front of the theater all day long.Seeing such a situation, he provided those onlookers with a lot of beautiful and strong wooden stools so that they could sit on them and rest for a while, and charged 80 kopeks for each stool.In order to be able to see this bizarre nose, a colonel with outstanding military exploits got up early and left home, and came here.It took a lot of effort for him to find a foothold among the crowded spectators.When he managed to squeeze in front of the window of Yongkel's shop, he couldn't find the nose at all.All he could see was a plain woolen sweater displayed in the window.There is also a painting that has been hanging here for more than ten years. In the painting, there is a girl wearing socks, and a man hiding behind a tree not far away is watching her.This man was of bad character at first glance, with a small mustache and a waistcoat with a lapel.The colonel left in a huff, saying: "Such rumors are ridiculous and outrageous!" Later, there were rumors that the nose of the eighth civil servant Kovalev had been walking in Taurida Park, not Didn't come to Neva Boulevard.During that period, the Persian Prince Khotslev Mirza lived nearby. His Royal Highness was also very surprised by this strange incident.Several students engaged in surgical research also came here on purpose, hoping to have a glimpse.A well-known lady made a request to the management of the park, hoping to allow her children to go in and feast their eyes.Of course, it would be even better if some introductions that can educate and inspire young people can be added.

Those gentlemen who liked to tease the ladies, who were worried about finding a joke to please their female companions, became very excited after hearing this strange incident.There are some people who are quite critical of this matter, although there are not many.These people are very kind and popular.One of the gentlemen accused angrily that such nonsense can be spread in today's civilized society, and the government department should ignore it, which is unreasonable.According to him, no matter what happens, the government needs to be involved, even if he quarrels with his wife every day.As for the development of this matter after that, no one knows, because the whole matter is once again shrouded in fog.

▲Three
Anything that goes against common sense is possible.There is no most absurd, only more absurd.That nose was pretending to be a fifth-class civil servant, traveling all over the city, and after causing a commotion, it suddenly returned to its original position and grew back on Kovalev's face again, as if everything that happened before was just a dream.This day was April 4. After Kovalev woke up in the morning, he inadvertently looked in the mirror.It doesn't matter if you don't take a photo, but you will be shocked if you take a photo!His nose actually returned to his face!It was indeed his nose, and he reached for it, quite sure.He marveled all his life: "Oh!" He was so happy that he even forgot to wear his shoes, and wanted to dance in the room with his bare feet.Unexpectedly, at this moment, Yi Fan walked in.He said he needed to wash himself up and told Yi Fan to bring the water right away.Afterwards, he took a look in the mirror after washing his face, the nose was still there, washed it again, and looked again, the nose was still there!

He then said: "Yi Fan, is there a small pimple on my nose, please come and help me take a look!" He thought to himself: "If Yi Fan answers like this: Sir, where is there any small pimple? You don't have a nose at all! It would be a disaster!"

However, Yi Fan's answer was: "No way, the top of the nose is so smooth, there are no small pimples at all!"

Kovalev muttered to himself: "That's good, it's a surprise to see it!" Then he snapped his fingers.At that moment the barber, Ivan Yakovlevich, entered timidly.He looked just like a cat whose owner beat him up for stealing oil.

Before he got close, Major Kovalev yelled at him: "Are your hands dirty today?"

"Not dirty at all!"

"Bullshit!"

"Sir, I swear to God, it's not dirty at all."

"Okay, come here, work carefully."

With that said, Kovalev sat down.Ivan Yakovlevich wrapped a cloth around him and quickly applied a white foam to his beard and parts of his face with a brush, just like those businessmen on their name day. The cream served to the guests that day was about the same.Ivan Yakovlevich looked at his nose and said to himself: "Oh!" Then he turned his face to one side, turned it towards himself, and observed his face again from this angle. nose, and came to the conclusion: "There is no more beautiful nose than this!" He observed for a long time, and finally stretched out two fingers, poking over cautiously, trying to catch Kovalev's nose tip on the between fingers.That's what he always did when he shaves.

Kovalev shouted loudly: "Hey, hey, be careful!" Ivan Yakovlevich had an unprecedented panic expression on his face, and he took his hand back early in the morning.Next, he could only fix the major's face with his thumb in one hand, pick up the razor in the other hand, and help him shave seriously.You know, when Ivan Yakovlevich shaves, he must hold his opponent's nose tightly with his hands.Right now, he has no choice but to choose this method, which has brought a lot of trouble to his work.However, these troubles were dealt with one by one by him, and he finally completed the shaving project satisfactorily.

After this, Kovalev immediately began to wear.Then, he took a carriage and came to the cake shop.As soon as he stepped into the door, he yelled loudly: "waiter, cocoa tea!" After saying that, he went to look at the mirror in the shop, and his nose was still on his face!At this moment, two soldiers also came to the store.Kovalev turned and squinted at them with a mixture of pleasure and sarcasm, for one soldier had a tiny nose almost as big as a waistcoat button.After coming out of the cake shop, Kovalev wanted to find a vacancy for a general affairs official, and of course, even better, he could become a deputy governor.When passing the reception room, he looked in the mirror again, and the nose was still there!Then, he went to meet with another eighth-class civil servant.The clerk, or the major, was very fond of finding fault with eggs.Kovalev always responded to this picky gentleman with this sentence: "I knew it, you are no different from a pin!" The major met me, and if even he can't find anything wrong with my current appearance, it means that my nose is absolutely still the same as before, staying on my face in a regular manner." The major Mr. In the end, nothing was said about it.Kovalev then thought: "That's it! It's all over at last!" On the way back, he ran into the school officer's wife, Bodetqingna, and her family's daughter.He saluted the two ladies, who responded enthusiastically.Apparently, his face had indeed returned to its original shape without any blemishes, and the turmoil had finally subsided.Kovalev spent most of the day talking with the two ladies.He also intentionally took out the snuff box in front of them, and took a strong snuff.He secretly muttered these few French words in his heart: "Stupid woman, if you have the ability, show me what you can do! Anyway, I won't marry your daughter, no matter what you do, I can't marry you." Make me submit! My relationship with her is just boyfriend and girlfriend, that's all!" Afterwards, Kovalev continued to wander around, whether it was the theater or Neva Boulevard, or wherever, he stayed behind. in his tracks.He seemed to have forgotten the bad experience before, and the same was true for the nose, which stayed on Kovalev's face all day long, showing no sign of disappearing again.In the days that followed, Kovalev was in high spirits and smiling every day, and all the beautiful ladies in the city became the object of his pursuit.These performances of his are obvious to all.Once, he bought a medal belt in a certain store.No one knows what he bought it for, and so far, he hasn't even received half a medal.

Our motherland has a vast territory, and our capital is located in the north of this vast land, which is where the above story happened.Let us think back to the development of the above story, which has many unbelievable plots.Not to mention how the nose broke the rules of nature, escaped bizarrely, and later turned into a fifth-class civil servant to swagger through the market. It is too much to say that Kovalev didn't even know that he couldn't publish the notice of finding the nose in the newspaper. It doesn't make sense anymore.I don't mean that such an advertisement costs a lot of money, I'm not a cheapskate, and it's really a small fee.It's just that it's unreasonable to publish such an announcement, it's embarrassing!Also, how did the nose get into the loaf, and it was a hot loaf just out of the oven?How did Ivan Yakovlevich commit the crime?I really can't find a clue, not even the slightest clue!The weirdest thing, though, is how those who made it up came up with such a bizarre plot.In my opinion, this is simply beyond the imagination of ordinary people.Alas, I am really confused.First, it is obviously of no use to our country to make up such a story;How to understand this, I have no idea at all.However, anything absurd is possible.As long as we use our brains, there will always be a little bit of reason.In such a story, you can always discover a little bit of interest, as long as you have the heart to discover it.This kind of thing does happen, and no matter what other people think, it exists in this world to some extent.

▲【Appreciation of works】

"The Nose" tells the story of a civil servant who suddenly discovered that his nose was missing one morning, so he immediately started looking everywhere.He was surprised to find that his nose was going around pretending to be an official, but there was nothing he could do about it.A few days later, a turning point occurred, and the nose returned inexplicably.However, the affair did not end there.

The "absurdity" in the plot of "The Nose" was determined by the ironic task Gogol set for himself when he wrote this novel; She was shocked, and worried about finding her nose but not being able to fit it.The behavior of the protagonist is certainly laughable, but the society that makes people lose their true colors is even more shocking. The absurd experience of "Nose", the strange experience of "Nose", and the unusual situation of "Nose" are the "starting point" for the writer to describe the living characters, reflect the terrible reality of social life, and ridicule the officialdom in Petersburg. It is an excellent "artistic generalization" made by the writer using fantasy images and comedy means.The major, who is at the center of this novel and has great real life, is the crystallization of this artistic generalization.

(End of this chapter)