dead souls, imperial envoy

Chapter 8 Dead Souls (8)
"Where have you been?" asked Nozdryov, and before Chichikov could reply, "I went to the fair, old man. Congratulate me: I've lost everything! Can you believe me? I have never lost so badly in my life. Look out the window! I only came back by hiring a car!" As he spoke, he touched Chichikov's head, almost hitting his head on the window frame. "Look, what a wreck that wagon is! I managed to get that wrecked horse back, and luckily I got into his wagon on the way." Nozdryov said, pointing to his companion, " You don't know each other, do you? This is my brother-in-law, Mizhuyev. I told him all morning about you. I said to him: 'Look, we will be surprised if we don't meet Chichikov.' Well, Dude, I've lost everything! Do you know, I've lost all four horses and everything I own. Now I don't even have a watch chain or pocket watch..." Chichikov looked After a while, Nozdryov did not see the bracelet and pocket watch.He even noticed that Nozdryov had different whiskers on both sides: the beard on one face was shorter than the other. "If I had even twenty rubles in my pocket then," continued Nozdryov, "it would have been enough if I had twenty rubles more. And I'm sure I'll get an extra thirty thousand rubles in my pocket."

"That's what you said," put in the yellow-haired man. "I gave you fifty rubles, and you lost it all."

"Shouldn't have lost! I never would have lost! If I hadn't been careful myself, really, had I not bet wrong on that dreadful seven, the house would have lost everything."

"But they didn't lose," said the blond. "As long as the bet is right, he will lose it all. Do you think the major is playing well?"

"Whether he is good or not, you have lost everything anyway."

"What's the big deal!" said Nozdryov, "I'll win him all too. Believe me or not, let him play a roll, and I'll show him and see how he plays." But, Chichikov, I drank my fill when the fair first started! The fair was amazing. The merchants said it was a real event. Everything I brought was sold Good price. Oh, man! We had a good drink! Now that I think about it... It's a pity you didn't come. Just think about it, a regiment of dragoons was stationed three versts outside the city. You Believe it, not to mention how many officers there are, there are forty in the city alone. Dude, we drank together... Cavalry Lieutenant Potseluyev... really good! Dude, he has a handsome mustache He called Bordeaux, France, 'Polo'. He called the waiter and said, 'Bring some bottles of Polo!' He's a real joker. I'm always with him. Ponomarev gives us a really good drink! I tell you, he's a liar, don't buy anything from his shop: He's got a lot of shit in his wine, rosewood and burnt corks and even elderberry, but if he gets a good bottle out of his back room, man, that's it. It tastes so good. The champagne we drank—the one at the prefect's is nothing compared to it! It's kvass at best! It's not just champagne, you see, it's A Matratura champagne, which is double champagne. He also brought us a bottle of Pompon. It smells like roses on a woman's dress. You can smell as much as you want. We It was really enjoyable to drink! After we left, a prince came and asked people to buy champagne in this shop, but there was no bottle of champagne in the whole city, because the soldiers drank it all. Can you believe it? , I drank seventeen bottles in one meal!"

"Hmph, you can't drink seventeen bottles," said the blond-haired one.

"I'm serious, I drank it," said Nozdryov. "You can say what you want, but I say, you can't drink ten bottles."

"I can drink, can you bet?"

"Why bet?"

"Well, we'll bet on the gun you bought in town."

"No gambling."

"Come and gamble, try it!"

"I don't try."

"That's right, it's better not to gamble. Once you bet, your gun will output as much as your hat. Oh, Brother Chichikov, it's a pity that you didn't come together! I know you will like Kuf Lieutenant Shennikov. You're sure to be good friends! He's not one of those Attorney Generals and misers in our province who see every penny like a lifeblood. He's good at poker, too. It doesn't matter if you play in the dealership, he can gamble with you how you want to gamble. Oh, Chichikov, what's the problem with you coming here once? Just because of this, you are like a beast, and you are only worthy of being with the beasts. Together! Kiss me, baby, I love you so much! Look, Mizhuyev, this is fate: who is he to me, and what am I to him? God knows where he got him Here, I happen to live here... Dude, I used to have a lot of carriages and a lot of money, but now... I went to play roulette and won two tubes of pomade, a china bowl and a handful Qin; once again, and this time I was cheated, and I paid six rubles for losing it all. You know how much Kuvshinnikov likes women! I went to almost all the balls with him. There was a woman Dressed up: all lace, everything... I said to myself: 'Damn it!' But Kuvshinnikov, the dandy, sat down beside her, I started talking to her in French... Believe it or not, he won't let go of ordinary women. He called this tasting wild strawberries. There were also people in the market who shipped the best fresh fish and dried salted fish Tenderloin. I brought a piece back with me, and luckily I got it while I had money. Where are you going now?"

"To call on someone," Chichikov said.

"Oh, forget it, go to him! There is some big man here, go to my house!"

"No, no, I have something to do."

"Come on, what can happen! You must be talking nonsense, Opoteltok Ivanovitch!"

"I really have something, very important thing."

"I bet you're lying! Who do you say you're visiting?"

"Visit Sobakevich."

Nozdryov laughed loudly when he heard this, and the flesh on his cheeks danced together, showing his teeth as white as sugar. Only a strong and energetic person can laugh so loudly. Even the neighbor who lives in the third room two doors away will be woken from the bed by this sound, staring wide-eyed and saying: "This man is crazy!"

"What's so funny about that?" said Chichikov, somewhat dissatisfied with the smile.But Nozdryov went on laughing loudly, and said as he laughed: "Oh, please forgive me, I'm dying laughing!"

"There is nothing ridiculous: I promised to visit him," said Chichikov.

"It's no fun going to him, he's a miser! I know you, and you're going to be disappointed if you try to go to him for a game of cards and a bottle of pompon. Listen to me, man, let Sobakevich Go to hell, come to my house! I'll treat you to the best dry salted fish fillet! Ponomarev swore: "This is specially prepared for you; you will never find this again." He's a liar.' But he's a liar. I said to him: 'You and our tax collectors are the number one liars!' The witty man just stroking his beard and laughing. Every day I go to the He went to have breakfast at his shop. Oh, man, I forgot to say, you will stick with me, but, as I said, I wouldn't sell it for ten thousand rubles. Hey, Porfiry !” He called the servant outside the window, and the servant secretly cut off a piece of dried salted fish fillet while taking things out of the car, and was eating with a knife in one hand and bread and dried salted fish fillet in the other. "Hey, Porfiry," cried Nozdryov, "bring you the puppy! This puppy is wonderful!" Turning to Chichikov, he said: "I am It was stolen, and the master said he would never sell it. I promised him a sorrel stallion, you remember, the one I bought from Hvostlev..." But Chichikov never I had never seen the sorrel horse, and I didn't know it was that Hvostlev.

"Master! Don't you want something to eat?" The old woman walked up to him and asked.

"No more. Well, man, we had a good time! But a vodka is all right. What vodka do you have here?"

"Vodka with anise," replied the old woman.

"Well, then, a glass of anise vodka," Nozdryov replied.

"Give me a drink too!" said the blond.

"There was an actress in the theater who sang like a canary! Kuvshinnikov said to me: 'Dude, it would be nice to taste this wild strawberry!' There are more than 50 of them. Those who do somersaults can do it for four hours at a stretch." At this point, he took the cup from the old woman, and the old woman bowed deeply to him in thanks. "Hey, bring him here!" he called out as Porfiry came in with the pup in his arms.Porfiry wore a colored gown like himself, only it was stained with dirt. "Come here and put it on the ground!"

Porfiry put the pup on the ground, and the pup got down on all fours and smelled the floor. "Look at the puppy!" Nozdryov picked him up by the back, making the pup howl pitifully.

"You didn't do what I told you," Nozdryov said to Porfiry, looking at the pup's belly, "you didn't grate him?"

"I've grated."

"Then why are there fleas?"

"I don't know. Probably just climbed up in the car."

"Lie, you lie, you don't have a grate at all; I see that you bastard let the fleas run on it. Look, Chichikov, look, what a nice ear you have. Touch it."

"No, you don't need to touch it to tell: it's a good dog!" Chichikov replied.

"No, you must hug and touch this ear!"

Chichikov had no choice but to touch the dog's ears and added: "Yes, it will definitely grow into a good dog."

"That nose, do you feel cold? You pinch it."

In order not to spoil his interest, Chichikov touched his nose again and said, "You must have a good nose."

"A pure-bred hound," said Nozdryov. "To be honest, I've wanted one for a long time. Come, Porfiry, take it!" Porfiry hugged the puppy's belly and put It took it back to the car.

"Oh, Chichikov, you come with me now. It's only five miles away, and you'll be there in one breath. After leaving my house, you can go to Sobakevich's again."

Chichikov thought: "It would be nice to go with Nozdryov. How is he better than the others? He's the same guy, and he just lost money. It looks like he'll talk better, maybe he can. Get something easy from him." And he said, "Well, let's go together, but you mustn't keep me, I don't have much precious time."

"Okay, baby, that's right! Just wait, let me kiss you."

Having said this, Nozdryov and Chichikov kissed each other on the cheek. "Great, the three of us together!"

"No, let me go." The yellow hair said, "I'm going home."

"Brother, don't talk nonsense, brother, I won't let you go."

"Really, my wife will be mad, now you can ride in his car."

"No, no! Don't even think about it!"

A blond is the kind of person who, at first glance, seems stubborn and ready to argue with you before you even open your mouth.This kind of people seem to never agree with things that are contrary to their ideas, they will never call a fool a smart person, and they will never let others lead them by the nose, but in the end, they will always show their personality. Be gentle, they will just agree with what they just strongly opposed, call a fool a smart person, and then let others lead them by the nose, they are simply obedient.In a word, he is an anticlimactic person who shouts high but has a low limit.The yellow hair gave another reason why he had to go home. Nozdryov said "Nonsense!" and capped him, and the yellow hair followed them obediently.

"My lord, the money for the drink is still pending..." said the old woman.

"Oh, yes, yes, old mother, come, brother-in-law! Give me the money for the drink. I don't have a kopeck in my pocket."

"How much?" asked the brother-in-law.

"Not much, sir, give me eighty kopecks," said the old woman.

"You lied, you lied, fifty kopecks is enough for her."

"That's too little, sir," said the old woman, but she took the money gratefully and kindly went to open the door for them.She won't lose out, because the price she asked was three times higher than the price of the wine.

They went out and got into the car.Chichikov's carriage and that of Nozdryov's brother-in-law went side by side, and the three of them could talk all the way. Far behind, where sat Porfiry and the puppy.The content of the conversation of these three gentlemen may not attract the reader, so let us tell a little about Nozdryov, who may be a very important character here.

Nozdryov thinks readers will be familiar with it, and there should not be too few people like this that you have seen.They will be called smart ghosts. They have a reputation as good playmates in childhood, and they can also earn a reputation as good classmates when they are enlightened. However, such a good reputation cannot stop violence, and they are often beaten black and blue. .There is often a straightforward, hearty and unrestrained expression on their faces.They are natural acquaintances, and they can call you "you" after a short time of acquaintance.Friendships with them are supposed to last forever, but it always happens that new friends get into a fight at a friendly dinner that evening.Most of them are talkative, drunkards, some people who make people happy.Nozdryov has lived for 35 years, and his temper is still the same as he was in his late teens and twenties: he is fond of eating, drinking and having fun.Even being married didn't change a bit, and his wife died soon after, leaving two children he didn't give much attention to.Fortunately, he entrusted the two children to a pretty little nanny to take care of them.It is difficult for him to stay at home all day.He has a keen sense of smell, and he can smell wherever there are various lively markets and dances tens of versts away; Among the booers and troublemakers, he found his kind. They all have a hobby of playing cards.In Chapter 1, we can know that he does not stick to the rules in playing cards, he knows all kinds of tricks, so the game will often change into another form in the end: he is not playing against the feet in thick leather boots Kicking is to let people pull off the handsome beard, so he often comes home with half of the beard, and the remaining half of the beard is quite scattered.Fortunately, his strong and plump cheeks are naturally excellent, with strong regenerative ability, and his beard will grow back soon, even better than before.Probably only in Russia would there be such a strange thing, he would soon gather together with those friends who kicked and beat him, and there would be no embarrassment when they met, as if it had never happened.In a sense, Nozdryov is a demon king in troubled times, and any party he attends will not be successfully concluded if something happens.In any case, there was going to be trouble: either the gendarme dragged him out, or his friends got him out themselves.He's always going to be in the limelight in a way that no one else would: he's either drunk in a bar and laughing like a fool, or he's full of big talk and lies so that he can't get himself out of the sky .He lied for no reason: he would suddenly say such nonsense that he had a blue or a pink horse, that anyone who heard it would have to say to him, "Well, man, you seem to be blowing a conch." After speaking, he hurriedly abandoned him.There is a kind of person who likes to spoil the people around him inexplicably.It's like a man in a high position, with a straight face and a gold star, who shakes your hand and says something profound and enlightening to you kindly, but turns around and insults you in your face. you.He's abusive, not like a man with a gold star on his chest who talks to you kindly and enlighteningly, but like a last-ranked fourteenth grade sesame official.The results will surprise you there.Nozdryov had just this peculiarity.Whoever makes out with him will immediately abuse him: he will spread some stupid and inexplicable rumors about the marriage and business you maintain, but he will certainly not consider himself your enemy; on the contrary, if you meet again You, he will still be very close to you, and even say: "You rascal, why don't you come to me anymore."

(End of this chapter)