dead souls, imperial envoy

Chapter 9 Dead Souls (9)
Nozdryov can be said to be an all-rounder, that is to say, he can do everything.For a period of time, he can tell you that he will follow you to travel anywhere in the world, and he can do any business you want to do together with you, and he can exchange everything you are willing to exchange.Guns, horses, hunting dogs, etc. can all be exchanged, but the exchange is not for taking advantage, but because he is born to dislike mediocrity and likes to be lively.If he won an honest man's money at the fair, he'd go into the shop and buy everything he saw, useful or not: horse yokes, scented wax, hoods for the nursemaid, raisins. Silver washbasins, foreign linen, fine flour, tobacco, pistols, herrings, pictures, crockery, boots, crockery--everything until the money was spent Light.He had trouble getting them home, though; most of the time it was loaded into another luckier gambler's cart in the afternoon.Sometimes he would bring his own pipe and tobacco purse, and sometimes he would send out all the horses, carriages, and coachmen, and finally he would go to a car with an acquaintance with only his underwear left.Nozdryov is such a person through and through, or readers will say that this kind of temper has long been a thing of the old life, and people like Nozdryov have long since disappeared in the wheel of history in the vast Russia.Unfortunately, this statement is wrong!Nozdryov will live on in this world for a long time.He is always with us on this land, perhaps in a different guise.It's a pity that people are often careless. When a person changes their appearance, they feel that they have changed.

At this moment three carriages arrived at the gate of Nozdryov's house.The family apparently did not anticipate their return.A wooden shelf dominated the dining room, and on it stood two peasants, singing promiscuously long songs while they feebly painted the walls.The floor was covered with white ash.Nozdryov called to the peasants who were working to remove the shelves, and then went to another room to arrange other things.Guests could hear him telling the chef to prepare the meal.Chichikov was hungry, but he calculated that the meal would not be served before five o'clock.On his return, Nozdryov showed the guests around his farm.It took them more than two hours to go round the farm, and there was nothing more to see.Their first visit was to the stables, where the guests saw a gray with black spots, a pale chestnut two stallions, and a bay horse, which looked ordinary, but Nozdryov swore Said he bought it for ten thousand rubles. "You didn't pay ten thousand for it," said his brother-in-law. "It's not worth a thousand."

"It really cost ten thousand," said Nozdryov.

"You can swear, say what you want."

"Well, let's make a bet!" said Nozdryov.His brother-in-law didn't want to bet.Then Nozdryov took them to some stables, which he said also had some good horses.They also saw a goat in the stable, which, in the old saying, must be kept among the horses, and it seemed that the goat lived in peace with the horses, and walked under the horses' bellies as if at home.Later Nozdryov showed the guests a bound wolf cub.He said: "Look at this little wolf cub! I feed it only raw meat. I want it to grow into a complete beast!" They went to look at the pond again, and Nozdryov said that both of them pulled the fish in it. Not moving, but his relatives did not pass up the opportunity to express doubts.Nozdryov said to Chichikov: "I will show you a pair of the strongest dogs: the thighs are as thick as stakes, and the jaw is like a needle!" He led the guest to a very fine little house, There is a big yard around the small house.As soon as you enter the yard, you can see all kinds of dogs. Some have long hair all over their bodies, and some only have long hair on their tails and thighs. The dogs have mixed colors: some are black with yellow, some are dark brown, some are Some are yellow with black spots, some are white with yellow spots, some have red spots, some have black ears, some have gray ears... The names of the dogs are even more strange, almost all of which are passwords: shoot, scold, fly, On fire, dead ghost, doom bite, quick-tempered ghost, libertine, beauty, matron, reward.Nozdryov was among them like a father among his children: they immediately raised their tails and rushed towards the guests enthusiastically, greeting them with greetings.A dozen dogs laid their paws on Nozdryov's shoulders. "Curse" also expressed such enthusiasm to Chichikov. It stood up on its hind legs and licked Chichikov's lips with the tip of its tongue. Chichikov immediately spat out in fright.After seeing these dogs with amazingly strong thighs--some good dogs indeed--they went to see a Crimean bitch.Nozdryov said that he would soon die of blindness. Two years ago, this was a good dog.The guest took a good look at the bitch—it was indeed blind.Afterwards, they went to see the water mill. The water mill was missing a "flying rotor" - this part would rotate rapidly with the shaft when placed on an iron seat. In the image language of the country people, the iron seat is called "Flying rotor".

"Look, we're almost at the smithy!" said Nozdryov.After walking a short distance, they did see the blacksmith's furnace, and visited it. "This is the field," said Nozdryov, pointing to a field. "This field is so full of hares that it covers the ground; I once caught one by the hind legs with my own hands."

"Hey, you can't catch hares with your hands!" His brother-in-law said again at the right time.

"But I did catch it, I did catch it!" Nozdryov replied. "And now," he said, turning to Chichikov, "I will show you my territory."

Nozdryov led his guests through a field full of mounds.The guests had to walk through fields of fallow fields and plowed crops.Chichikov was tired.Many places under their feet can tread water, this is a depression.At first they were mindful of their feet, choosing where to land, but then, realizing the futility of doing so, they straightened up, not caring what was more muddy and what was better.After walking a considerable distance, they actually saw a field of stakes and a narrow ditch.

"That's the border!" said Nozdryov. "All that you can see on this side is mine, and on the other side, the green woods and everything behind them are mine."

"When did that forest become yours?" asked his brother-in-law. "Did you just buy it? That forest didn't belong to you in the first place."

"Yes, I just bought it," Nozdryov replied.

"When did you buy it so quickly?"

"When, I just bought it the day before yesterday. I spent a lot of money, what the hell."

"But weren't you at the market that day?"

"Oh, you, Suo Fulong! Can't I go to the market and buy land? I went to the market, and my housekeeper went to buy land."

"Oh, the housekeeper is fine too!" His brother-in-law shook his head as he spoke, probably trying to get rid of his doubts.They walked over the muddy depression again, and the guests finally returned to the house.Nozdryov led them into a study, which did not bear the slightest sign of being called a study, and there were no books or papers; there were sabers and two shotguns hanging on the walls.The master said that one rod was worth three hundred rubles, and the other eight hundred rubles.After reading it, his brother-in-law shook his head again.Then several Turkish daggers appeared, one of which happened to be wrongly engraved with the name of the Russian craftsman: "Savely Sibilyakov".The host let the guests admire a hand organ⑦.Nozdryov demonstrated it to the guests on the spot.The music on the hurdy-gurdy was not without pleasure, but unfortunately there must have been something wrong with it: the "Mazurka" was played before the "Song of the Marbrugg Expedition", "The Marbrugg Expedition" "Song" later became a well-known waltz.Nozdryov had stopped playing long ago, but one of the flutes in the piano was unwilling to be lonely, and played a few more movements by solo.Then Nozdryov showed his pipes again: wooden pipes, earthenware pipes, meerschaum pipes, yellowed ones, not yellowed ones, with buckskin covers, without buckskin covers , and finally offered a long-pipe with an amber mouth, which was said to be just won, and a cigarette purse-the flowers on the purse were said to be a countess who fell in love with him at a small station. Embroidered.This lady's hands, if he describes them, are really slender as "Shubert Fleur" - the French word "superfluous" probably means delicate to him.They ate some dry and salted fish fillet first, and finally sat down at the table near five o'clock.Food and drink obviously did not play a central role in Nozdryov's life; no one cared how well the dishes were cooked: some were burnt, others were not cooked at all.It seems that the cook cooks most of the time by flashes of inspiration. What he catches is nothing. If he catches pepper, he sprinkles pepper; Put whatever you want in the pot, make do with it, as long as it is hot, there will always be something.Nozdryov was very fond of wine: before the soup was served, he had already poured a large glass of Bordeaux wine and a large glass of fine Sautna for the guests, because many provincial and county towns There is no ordinary Sautna.Nozdryov then ordered a bottle of Madeira, of which the Generalissimo had never tasted anything better.This Madeira wine is really hot in the mouth, because the vintners have already figured out the taste of the landowners who love to drink high-quality Madeira wine, and they have no scruples in the Madeira wine. Wine, sometimes even mixed with nitric acid, hydrochloric acid, God forbid, the Russian stomach can withstand anything.Later Nozdryov sent for a special bottle of wine, which he said was comparable to Burgundy and champagne.He graciously poured wine for his brother-in-law and Chichikov, who sat on his right and left, but Chichikov seemed to have noticed that Nozdryov had not much in his own glass.This alarmed him, and later he secretly spilled his wine on the plate while Nozdryov was talking, or pouring wine for his brother-in-law.Soon came the pepper wine, which, according to Nozdryov, had a real plum taste, but which smelled surprisingly pungent of fusel wine.Later, I drank some kind of scented liquid wine. The name of the wine was really hard to remember. Even the owner himself changed it to another name when he called it for the second time.Supper was long over and all wines tried, but the guests remained at the table.In any case Chichikov was unwilling to speak seriously to Nozdryov in the presence of his brother-in-law: after all, the brother-in-law was a third party, and the subject was best discussed in private and friendly.In fact, it might not be a bad thing for the brother-in-law to be present at this time, because he was already full of wine and food, and was dozing off incessantly on the chair.He himself realized that he was drunk, and was at last going home, but his voice was so feeble that, to use a Russian saying, it was like clamping a horse's neck to a bridle. "No, no! I won't let you go!" said Nozdryov.

"Don't embarrass me. My friend, I must go," said his brother-in-law. "You are embarrassing me so much."

"Nonsense, nonsense! We're about to set up a card table."

"Come on, man, you can fight yourself, I can't stay with you, my wife will not like it. Honestly, I should tell her about the episode. Man, really, I should let her go Happy. No, you must not keep me!"

"Hey, she, your wife, fuck her, let her see... What important things can you do together!"

"No, man! She's so faithful, so virtuous! She takes good care of me... I'm ready to cry. No, you don't keep me; I'm a good man, I must go. What I say to you is Speak from your heart."

Chichikov also whispered to Nozdryov: "Let him go, what can he do!"

Nozdryov said: "That's right! I'm sick of this dawdling and indecisive fellow!" Then he raised his voice and said to his brother-in-law: "Then go out by yourself, go back and hang out with your wife, Useless!"

"No, man, you can't call me a loser," said my brother-in-law. "I'll be grateful to her all my life. It's true, she's so gentle, so virtuous, so considerate to me... I'm moved to tears; she If you ask me what I saw in the episode, I tell her all about it, she is so cute, really."

"Go away, then, and talk nonsense to her! Here's your hat."

"No, man, why should you say that about her. You're just offending me, she's such a lovely person."

"Go on, then, and go to her!"

"Yes, man, I'm going, forgive me. I'd like to stay, but I can't."

His brother-in-law was still apologizing upside down, and he didn't notice that he had already got into the carriage and walked out of the gate, facing an empty field in front of him.It can be seen from this that his wife does not necessarily hear all the grand occasions at the market.

"Look at that wreck!" Nozdryov said from the window, looking at the receding carriage, "take your time! That little pony is really nice, I wanted to get one early in the morning, but with the He just can't get along, a person like him. A wimp, yes, a wimp!"

After that, they went into the house.Porfiry brought in the wax table, and Chichikov saw the master conjuring a deck of cards. "Well, brother," said Nozdryov, shuffling the cards with a tricky finger, "let's kill the time, and I'll take three hundred rubles!"

But Chichikov pretended not to hear the invitation, and said as if suddenly remembering: "Oh, I almost forgot, I have something to ask of you."

"what's up?"

"You have to promise me first!"

"what's up?"

"You promise me first!"

"Ok."

"Agreed?"

"It's a word."

"I beg you for one thing: perhaps you have many serfs who have died and have not registered their names?"

"Yes, how about it?"

"Transfer it to me, and transfer it to my name."

"What's the use of you coming?"

"I am useful."

"What is the use?"

"Anyway, it's useful...it's my business, I'm useful."

"There must be some mechanism here. Really, what's your idea?"

"What kind of mechanism can there be, and what kind of ideas can be used for this kind of thing?"

"Then what do you want them for?"

"Ouch! You're so curious! Seeing the tatters, I want to touch them with my hands, and I have to smell them!"

"Then why don't you speak up?"

"It's useless for you to know. Hey, I just had a whim."

"Forget it, if you don't explain clearly, I will definitely not listen to you!"

"Look, this is what's wrong with you: you can't take your words seriously."

"Whatever you say, if you don't explain why it's useful, I'll definitely never do it."

"How to explain it to him?" Chichikov thought to himself. After thinking for a while, he said that he needed dead serfs to improve his status. He didn't have a big manor yet, so it would be good to have some serfs first.

"Lie, lie!" cried Nozdryov before he had finished speaking. "You're lying, brother!"

Chichikov himself knew that the lie was childish and untenable. "Then I'll tell you the truth," he said, recovering his composure, "you mustn't tell. I'm going to marry; but the bride's parents are too worldly, and I'm sorry. That's the thing, They wanted their future son-in-law to have at least 150 serfs, but I was short of [-]..."

"Oh, you're still lying!" Nozdryov cried again.

"There is not even such a slight lie in what I say," said Chichikov, pointing out a small part of his little finger with his thumb.

"I'd bet my head on you lying!"

"It makes me so sorry! What do you take me for! Why should I come here to lie?"

"Because I know you: you're a big liar, let me tell you straight for my friend's sake! If I were your boss, I'd hang you from a tree as soon as I found one."

At this point, Chichikov felt ashamed.Anything slightly rude or insulting will turn him off.He doesn't even like people being too intimate with him on any occasion.Of course, if the other party's official rank is much higher than him, then it is a different matter.So now he even feels a little depressed.

"To tell you the truth, I'll hang you," Nozdryov repeated. "I'm telling you the truth, and I don't mean to offend you, it's just that we're friendly enough."

"Everything must be done properly," Chichikov said for the sake of face, "if you want to show off such dirty words, then go to the army." After a pause, he continued, "You don't want to give away If so, just sell it to me."

"Sell it to you? Haha, I know people like you, you villain, will you pay a big price?"

"Hey, it's you! Are those dead serfs of yours made of diamonds?"

"Hmph, that's right. I know people like you."

"Come on, old man, where'd you get your miser's temper! You should have given them to me for free."

"Well, listen to me. To prove that I'm not a miser, I don't want any money. I'll sell you my stallion. A dead serf is nothing."

"What use would I have a stallion?" said Chichikov, really at a loss at the suggestion.

"What's the use of it? I bought it for [-] rubles, and now I'll give it to you for [-]."

"What's the use of having a stallion? I don't have a stud farm."

"Listen to me, you don't understand: you only need to give three thousand first, and the remaining one thousand will be discussed later."

"But I don't need a stallion!"

"Then you can buy my pale sorrel horse."

"I don't need a horse either."

"You have two thousand roubles for a stallion and the gray stallion you saw just now."

"But I really don't need a horse."

"You can sell it, you can sell it for three times the money if you go to any fair."

"If you can sell it for three times the price, then you can sell it yourself."

"I know it's guaranteed to make money, but I want to give you some money."

(End of this chapter)