Change until the world gives way to you

Chapter 20 A Good Image Knocks on the Door to Success (3)
Charles II was overjoyed when he heard Brett's unreasonable defense. He not only pardoned him, but also rewarded him with a large bounty.

It can be seen that sometimes knowing how to praise the other party, maintain and improve the status of the other party can effectively ease the relationship with the other party.When we sincerely praise others, the other party will also be sincerely happy and have a good impression of us.Therefore, if you want to ease and improve the relationship between the two parties and shorten the distance between each other, you might as well use sincere praise for them.

In the history of the United States, there was a manager with an annual salary of one million named Scooper, who was the general manager of the U.S. Steel Corporation.A reporter once asked him: "Why is your boss willing to pay you more than 100 million a year in salary? How can you get so much money?" Scoble replied: "Do I know anything about steel? There are many, but my greatest ability is to inspire employees. And the best way to motivate employees is to show their sincere appreciation and encouragement.” To put it bluntly, Scoble’s annual salary exceeds 100 million.Interestingly, Schauber did not forget to praise people until his death.He wrote on his epitaph: "Here lies a man who is good at dealing with subordinates who are smarter than him."

It is human nature to love to hear compliments. Everyone likes positive stimuli and dislikes negative stimuli.If everyone is willing to praise others in interpersonal relationships and is good at praising the strengths of others, then the happiness in interpersonal communication will also be greatly increased.Of course, praising others is not flattery. While invigorating interpersonal relationships, you should also express your own ideas, pay attention to your own needs, and maintain self-esteem.

When you need to disagree and stand up for yourself, remember:
(1) Maybe you will find that your heart is pounding and your hands are shaking, but don't let yourself lose control;

(2) Pay attention to your own gaze. You should maintain a standing posture with your object at the same time, with your back straight and your shoulders relaxed. Look at each other frankly and directly, but avoid staring at someone provocatively;

(3) Body posture.It is very important to use your body and voice to say what you care about, such as looking the other person in the face when speaking, keeping your body forward, enunciating clearly, firmly and evenly;

(4) Emphasize the self.When you speak with an emphasis on yourself, you'll be able to clearly express your wishes and expectations without putting the other person in an adversarial position.For example, you can use sentence patterns such as "I think", "I think", and "I am willing" to express your wishes;

(5) speak sharply;

(6) Euphemistic hints;
(7) Compromise.If your discussion goes nowhere, you can do a brief review of how the conversation went.

In order to make our interpersonal relationship more harmonious, please don't be stingy with your compliments, give more sincere compliments to those around you!If you want to express your personality, please also pay attention to your wording. Expressing yourself authentically is the key.

If you think this is a gradual process, don't worry too much.As long as you take the first step bravely, open your mouth fearlessly like Obama, and take the initiative to talk to others, one day, others will discover you, understand you, agree with you, appreciate you, and support you.

please stick to your personality

How do you keep your image from being overlooked on so many occasions?
We hope that we have a clear positioning, and then we always learn how this positioning should look to change ourselves. This is a wise method.However, when you start to integrate into this positioning, you will find that there are many similar people, so many that it will be troublesome even to divide them into small categories.Among such a group of people with the same type of positioning, how to stand out depends on whether you can show your unique personality.

And this kind of personality cannot be discovered at the beginning, nor can it become your best image at the beginning, so you need to find your own unique personality with the help of others.

The now famous host Li Yong recalled his original scene like this:
In October 1998, when I hosted "Lucky 10" for the first time, I was nervous when I came on stage. Return in defeat.

In the evening, I drank alone outside until very late before returning home.When I got home, Ha Wen saw my sluggish appearance, she came over and said to me: "Li Yong, no matter what you do, I believe you can have your own personality, forever!"

This is not the first time Harvin has said something like this to me.At the beginning, it was agreed that the monthly pocket money my family would give me was 100 yuan, and the money was often spent in half a month.Then I said to her directly: "My money is used up, it's time to use yours." If it were someone else, I would have dumped me, but she said: "I like your personality, I hope you can stick to it .”

What can I say?Out of the house, that sentence filled me with strength.When I went to the station, everyone looked at me strangely, because the shadow of yesterday's show did not appear on me at all.I joked as usual, went on stage as usual, the second recording and broadcasting, the stage fright was gone, and my "speaking the truth" style of speaking attracted applause from the audience.

At that time, from the audience to the stage, many people could not understand me, I endured it, and I swallowed the knocked out teeth.Sometimes I want to change it myself, but right away, I thought of Harvin's words.Yes, it's not me anymore.For me, a host's personality is very important. From the moment he appears on the screen, he must have the mental capacity to let others talk casually.In this way, my hosting style was settled: no matter what I look like or what I wear, I will always maintain enthusiasm and sincerity, and no matter who I meet, I will speak up.

Unexpectedly, later on, more and more viewers liked me, and my personality became a magic weapon for the success of my program.Since the broadcast of "Lucky 52", my clothing style and hairstyle have basically remained the same for so many years. Some people say why you don't change, and I say this is me - Li Yong!
So, no matter what, please stick to your individuality. This sentence is not only for others, but also the biggest request for me.

After reading Li Yong's confession, can we see the importance of personality?Because all living beings are bound to be similar in one way or another. However, there are no two identical leaves in the world. Only when you discover your own uniqueness and can gradually develop it into a way that people like, we will Be sure to stick to your own uniqueness.A famous quote from the Danish philosopher Golkogaard: "The wild duck may be tamed, but once tamed, the wild duck will lose its wildness, and it will no longer be able to fly freely in the sea and the sky." We should not always follow the society Going in the mainstream direction, sometimes what suits us is the best, so that we feel that this is the most authentic state of a person.

Holland believes that the degree of fit between personality and work environment determines career satisfaction, career stability and career achievement.According to his theory, in our modern social culture, people can be divided into six personalities arranged in a hexagon in a fixed order: realistic, traditional, entrepreneurial, research, artistic, and social. The environment is also divided accordingly.

Realistic (R): Ability to operate machinery, like machinery, tools, plants or animals, and prefer outdoor activities.

Traditional type (C): Likes to work on materials, has the ability of writing or mathematical analysis, can follow instructions, and complete trivial work.

Entrepreneurial (E): Likes to interact with crowds, confident, persuasive, leadership, pursues political and economic success.

Inquiry (I): Likes to observe, learn, research, analyze, evaluate, and solve problems.

Artistic type (A): Artistic, intuitive, and creative, likes to use imagination and creativity, and works in a free environment.

Social (S): Good at getting along with people, like to teach, help, inspire or train others.

If the code is ASI (Artistic, Social, Research), the most suitable ones are artists, painters, journalists, etc.People have different opinions on the influence of personality on their career orientation and development, but so far they have not been able to find a consistent and convincing answer.However, it cannot be denied that in actual work, personality has had an obvious impact on career orientation, career transition and career development.

Naturally, personality and many subjective or external objective factors have an impact on their career development.For example, the individual's professional ability tendency, interests and needs, the demand status of the talent market, professional background and work experience, etc.According to a large number of examples, it is proved that personality is the first prerequisite for people to engage in a certain occupation, and to some extent, personality plays a vital role in the influence of career development.

Emerson once said that when we are really confused, hurt, or even in pain, we will generate strength from weakness and evoke unpredictable and powerful indignation.To live a life in the world, one must first of all have self-respect and self-respect, never bow down when being discriminated against, and be neither humble nor overbearing in front of powerful forces, so as to win the respect of others.

(End of this chapter)