Alternative Telling of Dream of Red Mansions: Cherishing Spring

Chapter 30
"I won't let him go." From his own pain, he thought of Jia Zhen, the culprit, and wished to cut him into pieces.

"No need, good and evil will be rewarded in the end, not to mention that he suffers less than me." Xichun turned sideways, looked up at him, and continued as if she understood what he was going to say, "It's not because he is my brother And forgive him, if I have a little affection for him, I still can't feel peaceful in my heart, I don't care about what he does, or anything about him. So I can not hate."

Accidental death is not the same as being intentionally killed.

She leaned up and kissed him, wrapping her arms around his neck, affectionately.

After a long time, he said: "The person who can really make me willing is my ancestors."

Feng Ziying met her eyes and began to kiss her slowly inch by inch without saying a word.Xichun responded cordially and naively, like a woman bathing in an icy blue lake, shy and alarmed when she sees a strange man who has not covered her clothes.

Lust has more to do with women's feelings. It is like music, which can only become real with the help of musical instruments.A woman, with the help of a man she loves, awakens this deep-seated spasm into a real erotic tremor that begins at the shoulder and travels swiftly to the fingers and toes.

This is her first time.Those things didn't count before, that person wasn't her.

Feng Ziying's mind is full of images of a tryst with Xichun, walking to the garden with three wobbles, everyone is already waiting, Xichun is standing next to his wife under the shade of a thick bamboo, with a gloomy expression.He didn't dare to take another look.Feng's mother asked a few words, but he covered it up, saying that because of the busy court affairs, she fell asleep in the meditation room, and the monks did not dare to disturb her, so it was late.

No one doubts.The two families bid farewell to each other and boarded their cars to return home.Goodbye is not far away, only two months later.

Because Chen Hou was seriously ill, he and Yuchan went to visit him.He took Jia Yan's order to visit Chen Hou, and Yu Chan stayed with his mourning wife in the side hall.Feng Ziying led Zhang Youshi in, and saw a large group of maids and women standing aside holding towels and bowls, not daring to show their air, only heard Marquis Wuqing panting and moaning like a bellows, and a few imperial doctors discussing the stealing of soup in the gauze drawer next door Whispering, the person standing by the bed is actually Xichun.

Feng Ziying was stunned for a moment, Xichun turned her head and saw him standing at a loss, so she whispered into Marquis Wuqing's ear: "Master Hou, General Feng saw you coming." After speaking, she glanced at Feng Ziying, I went straight to hide behind the screen behind the bed. "It's Ziying." Wu Qinghou said twice, then slowly turned around, opened his eyes with difficulty, and showed a faint smile.Feng Ziying has never been a sentimental person, but this situation made him feel sad and unspeakable-the hero is twilight, lying on the bed quietly waiting to die.Life is so cold, but it is nostalgic.

After greeting him, he asked Zhang Youshi to come forward and feel Chen Hou's pulse.

Looking down, a vague figure on the screen appeared in his heart.He is a late hero, and she is a lonely beauty.Who is more pitiful than whom?
He was so worried that he worried about the future for Xichun.Unexpectedly, someone in that room has decisively decided everything for Xichun—in the side hall, the wife frowned and refused, and Yuchan was beside her to persuade her.

"You don't need to comfort me. I know the master's illness in my heart. As the saying goes, if you can cure the disease, you can't cure it. I'm thinking about it now. It's just that if the master leaves, I don't have any children in this big family. Alone and helpless..."

"I thought, Madam might as well adopt one, the younger one. You are still the head of the family here, and the whole family dare not underestimate you."

"Why don't I think so. It's just that this matter can't be rushed. If you are in a hurry, someone will take advantage of it. You have to watch it carefully!" Madam sighed and raised her head to wipe her tears. She reached out and stroked Yuchan's shoulder and said, "I don't want you understand my heart."

Yuchan apologized and said with a smile: "What do I know, I just learned by listening. The old lady at home is a close friend with you, and she is very concerned about your situation. What I said is just to pass on the old lady's meaning. After all How to do it, ma'am, you have a clear mind, so there is no need for us juniors to talk too much."

Madam shook Yuchan's hand and nodded, "This is one thing. I still have a heart problem. You know that Xichun is young. It's not that I can't tolerate her. It's just how can I make her guard like me. How to arrange her?" , and it's really nerve-wracking. Do you have an idea?"

Yu Chan frowned and sighed, "What do you mean by unknown Hou Ye himself?"

The lady said: "What can he mean? I wish I could take it with me before and after my death. I won't leave him for a moment, just ask me to rest." The words were full of jealousy.

Yuchan tentatively asked: "Master Hou, do you want to die? Now I don't want to die. Our family has sacrificed a few times before, but later I felt that it was too hurtful."

The madam said: "You're right! I don't agree either. It's a trivial matter to die a person, and it's not worthwhile to hurt the yin and affect future generations."

"Actually, there is a way not to be martyred." Yuchan raised her head and glanced at Madam, and said slowly.

"Talk about it!"

"Madam only thinks about the past. During the Tang Dynasty, Emperor Taizong was critically ill. He asked Wu Mei and other old concubines to go to Ganye Temple. He was compassionate and strict."

"Then Wu Meiniang didn't..."

Yuchan shook her head and said with a smile: "Isn't Madam thinking too much? She thinks too highly of that one! That Wu Meiniang is Wu Meiniang, and Aunt Xi is Aunt Xi. The same people have different fates, and there is no prince here for her to seduce. Besides, you have good intentions." For her life, she set up a longevity tablet and prayed for you for the rest of her life, but she dared to come back and fight with you?"

Yuchan stood up as she spoke, walked behind Mrs. Chen, squeezed her shoulders, and said, "I saw Aunt Xi meditating in the temple a month ago, and that was not ordinary piety. Madam may as well ask her, how can such an arrangement be made?" She would."

Hearing this, Madam was so excited that she almost clapped her hands and applauded, remembering that she shouldn't be too vocal at this time, she hurriedly suppressed her excitement, and beckoned to the servant girl: "Go invite your Aunt Xi to come..."

Yu Chan stood behind his wife and smiled, looking from the high threshold of the heavy wooden door to the empty steps outside the hall.She has deep thoughts and secrets, just waiting for her to come and see her reaction!She wants to pay back the surprise that Xichun once gave her.

Not long after, the servant girl brought Xichun over.Seeing Li'an sitting down, Madam said something.Xichun looked at her quietly, eyes like a sleeping lake.

Like a stone thrown into an unfathomable abyss, there is no answer.Xichun lowered her head, so quiet that the ruler was uneasy.Then she raised her head, raised her quiet eyes, and saluted Mrs. Chen who was sitting on the head: "This is my best home. I am willing to obey Madam's arrangement and become a monk to pray for the master and you."

The calm and calm voice came to the ears and echoed in the hall.Things went smoothly unexpectedly, Madam was very happy in an instant, she stood up and stretched out her hand to help Xichun, said one mouthful: "Good sister, you know the general idea, it is worthwhile for us to get to know each other, the Marquis loves you so much again! Amitabha, the Chen family With you, you have accumulated great virtues in your previous life." She spoke emotionally, but behind her, Yu Chan's face changed, her smile froze and she was extremely disappointed.She thought it was a deadly knife aimed at the enemy's vitals, but unexpectedly the opponent had already given up his body when the knife entered his body.

Feng Ziying, who walked to the door, only had time to hear Xichun's words - a monk, with a humming sound in his head, falling apart!

His complexion changed, and he vomited blood without making a sound. Zhang Youshi, who was following him to report his illness, stretched out his hand to support him in a panic, and said in surprise, "Ziying, what's wrong with you! But did you trigger the old disease?" ?”

"Shut up." He snapped in a low voice.Holding on to the wall, he tried his best to stand still, took out a plain silk to wipe his mouth, stuffed it into his clothes, and led Zhang Youshi in.

"Ziying, how is Lord Hou?" Seeing him and Zhang Youshi coming in, the lady stood up and asked without caring about the greetings.

"Madam." He stared at the woman who sent Luo Xichun to the nunnery.He hated her for being calm and cruel before.It is like this, the reason why a disaster is a disaster is because it has approached itself, and it is extremely dangerous. If it happens to others, it is nothing more than a few small talk, so why worry about it?

"Master Hou is dying, just for a moment. Madam, go and see me soon." He announced coldly.In an instant, Mrs. Chen's old and flustered face was undoubtedly exposed in front of his eyes. She was in a daze, so old and flustered.Her husband is about to die, and the human body sinks into the boundless deep sea, rots with the sea water, and will never rise again.

"Yuchan, what should I do?" She just cried and grabbed Yuchan tightly.The weakness and humbleness of the aristocratic ladies are exposed.Once the crutches she relied on for survival were removed, she cried out in fear like a child who needs to learn to walk by herself.

"Ma'am, you have to mourn. Hurry up and take care of Lord Hou." Yuchan accompanied Drip.One sentence reminded Madam that she was no longer just crying, if she wanted to cry, don't cry here, Yuchan beckoned to call for her servants, hurriedly helped Madam to go, no one called Xichun.Xichun stood there without moving a step, she knew that Madam didn't want her to join in the excitement of dying, she was a monk, and this sensational tragedy had nothing to do with her.

She lowered her head and only read the scriptures of past lives.Feng Ziying looked at Yu Chan, who was busy consoling his wife, and smiled coldly, then turned to tell Zhang Youshi: "You also run to see if there is anything you can help, and serve carefully."

Zhang Youshi responded and followed.After everyone left, Feng Ziying turned around to look at the people in the hall.Xichun was still standing there, as motionless as a stone sculpture.After Yuchan urged his wife to leave, she suddenly felt regretful. After the incident in the temple last time, the relationship between her and Feng Ziying was as cold as ice. There were no outsiders around, so she really didn't dare to say anything to him.In her heart, she felt that it was Ziying who was ashamed of herself, so she was stunned and had nothing to say.

"Xichun." Regardless of Yuchan's presence, he walked over and hugged Xichun's shoulders. As soon as he uttered these two words, the sorrow accumulated in his heart flowed down his cheeks, "Why are you suffering so much?" Zhong struggled to open his eyes, and said sadly, "And I see you being pushed into misery again and again, but I can't do anything about it. How can I be so incompetent! You didn't marry me, it turns out...it turns out to be good."

Xichun closed her eyes, her lips trembled slightly. "Ziying..." She suddenly hugged him with her backhand, crying hoarsely.Forgive me for the last time to indulge like this!Desperate emotions have long been intertwined, occupying her body and mind. How many times, when she thought she was about to collapse, she behaved extremely calmly and calmly.As if nothing had happened, at this moment she was able to see clearly that the original pain-free has not disappeared, but is like a clam, tightly clamping the wound in her heart, exchanging the bloody pain for it to become the pale luster seen by outsiders things.The so-called calmness is nothing more than being able to calmly examine one's own wounds one day.But she never got relief, as when she was suddenly strangled by a close relative when she was a teenager, she couldn't breathe.For many years, for many years, the shadow in my heart has not dissipated.She folded them up and stored them carefully so that no one could see them, and fear and anger lingered deeply in her heart.No way out, no way out!

She thought she was destined to be his wife.Whether this happiness is illusory or long can always try to believe, we sometimes meet many worthy people, and sometimes there is only one such person.From the moment she lost him, she knew that she didn't care about happiness or unhappiness, like a wolf that lost its chewing function, and lost interest in trying after seeing its prey running all over the mountain.

Yu Chan, who had been silent by the side, was first startled, watching them embrace and cry.Then, the feelings in her heart gradually became complicated, mottled like time.Her husband hugged another woman in front of her, and that woman also hugged him tightly. She was sad and humiliated, but she couldn't find any pure hatred, and she couldn't go boldly. Hate them both, you can't hate them as adulterers and adulterers.There was no pleasure at all, she knew that she was the outsider.

There was no way to just leave.She had too much love for him in her heart, and love tied her to leave.Feng Ziying, from a 13-year-old royal hunt, saw him straddle a horse and raise his bow. He was the champion among ten thousand people. After receiving Yu Ruyi from the emperor, she turned her head and smiled at herself. Her love for him was planted like a tree. The annual rings expand and increase every year.

She is the daughter of the Nalan family, and many people are waiting for her.I used to be thankful that I escaped to enter the palace to be selected, and I don't have to become the emperor's concubine like the female elders in the family. Once I entered the palace, I would let go of all my feelings for him. She didn't want to, so she had to risk her life to fight , painstakingly let himself get typhoid fever, lingering sick bed and almost died.

The candle shadow was red, and she thought that if he couldn't come to see her, it would be good to fall asleep.Unable to tell anyone what's on her mind, mother blames her for not caring for herself, father blames her for missing the chance to enter the palace, he has already made almost all arrangements, as long as she enters the palace, she will immediately start as a concubine.She bears all these accusations silently, just because the sweetness he left in her heart can outweigh all the bitterness.

One day when he finally came, she remembered that he didn't like sex, so she hurriedly supported and asked someone to change all the curtains and cushions in the room, but he didn't come, he just talked with his parents and elders in the front hall, I sent someone to ask about it.She responded to the caller, fell on the bed and laughed at herself stupidly. Although Manchu women are not as petty as Han women, there is no reason for a grown man to go directly to the boudoir to see a doctor.Both are adults.

Gradually getting better, hearing people say that he went to another family to propose a marriage, he felt cold, and almost got sick again, but after a while, he heard his mother start talking about her marriage, promising to Feng's family, which meant that she was always a little unwilling.It was my father who agreed.She married happily, and the husband and wife have been harmonious for two years, how could he know that his friendship with her was just absent-minded and perfunctory.

He is right!It turned out that it was good that you didn't marry me, and it turned out to be good too.She got the key to live with him and opened the room, but he wouldn't go in.She stayed alone in the empty room, the so-called gain was originally not.

She couldn't help asking herself, if she hadn't married him back then, she would only remember the frivolous smile when she was young.See you again in the feasting hall in the future, and send hook spring wine and warm wine to the next seat, and divide Cao to shoot candles and light red.I'm afraid it's better to leave a thread of bewilderment.

She heard him pleading to Xichun: "Don't become a monk." Seeing that Xichun said nothing, "Well, I'll find a garden and build a nunnery for you. If you don't want to see others, then don't. As long as you don't leave me."

Yuchan laughed. To another person, he was willing to kneel and beg like this, down to willingness, but to her, he was always just indifferent.Even if she slams the door and leaves now, the result is still the same.Indifference is not necessarily a kind of condescension.I don't care enough about you, whether you come or go, it's up to you.She suddenly understood that she was in love with Feng Ziying, so it was short-lived.And Feng Ziying is no longer in love with Xichun.He no longer adores, but needs.Accordingly, he does not need her.This is the uniqueness of emotion, and the rules that are required between people are so simple and cruel.

"Ziying." Xichun rested her head on his shoulder and said, "I recalled a dream I had before. In the dream, someone gave me a piece of paper, and the prophecy on the paper said: 'Three years of exploration will not last long, and the black clothes will be changed immediately. "Previous Years Makeup", I was shocked and inexplicable when I saw it, I just felt it was hot, and I wanted to tear it to pieces. Now I know that it is a pre-determined life. The things we do, the people we meet, life, old age, sickness and death, are like the wet scene in my dream. The fog, which looks ambiguous, actually has its own mystery."

"Don't talk about it! I won't listen!" Feng Ziying yelled anxiously, "Xi'er, I beg you to go back with me, as long as you stay by my side, I will take care of other things. I have missed it once, and I don't want to do it again. "

"Where do you put the people around you?" Xichun turned to look at Yuchan.Yuchan saw the beauty of Xichun by accident, and her eyes were full of waves, which were unstoppable.

"Whether it's God's trick or someone deliberately doing it, we are all doomed to bear this ending. Ziying, don't you admit that we have no destiny in this life? I pulled my feet out of the world inch by inch Li, walking so far seems to be on the edge of a cliff, and you will succeed if you jump off, but you are the one holding me back, I will not follow you back to the middle of the world, tossing around all kinds of entanglements and not being able to move. I am no longer the indifferent mind at that time The little girl who wants to marry you, all she wants is to heal the scars through the warmth of love, but now it is no longer. Whether I can be with you is no longer my obsession, you let me see the value of a person's love for another person, and experience the world Love is the truth. I have done what I want to do, and there are still many things I don’t understand. I will never forget you, but you are no longer my obsession and bondage. You must still be tossed and turned in the world, why bother Leaving me in vain will increase your troubles and become your burden."

After Xichun finished speaking, she took a step back, looked at him deeply, turned and left.She turned around, feeling that her eyes were sore as if she was about to go blind, so painful that she couldn't shed a single tear.

Feng Ziying stood dumbfounded, her words pierced him seven inches like a sharp sword, the pain made him unable to move.What he saw was Xichun who was determined to throw away all her karma and leave. Even if she was separated before, she could be sure that she was the only person who existed clearly in her heart and entered.But now he is not even sure about this, he can only let go silently and let her go.

His face was ashen, and he was about to fall down gradually.Yu Chan hurriedly stepped forward to help him to sit on the chair, saw that the corner of his mouth was bleeding profusely, and knew that it was the attack of an old disease, she was so anxious that she burst into tears, but she didn't dare to disturb Madam Chen, so she had to send someone to call Zhang Youshi, and waited for him. Waiting for him to slow down, he hurriedly asked someone to prepare the car and return home.

Xichun saw Ruhua again when she was packing up and preparing to move into the nunnery by herself.At this time, she moved into another garden and was detained together.Madam didn't want her to take part in the funeral, Xiuhen who had been serving her for three years was called away, and she only sent a rough envoy to bring food to her every day, completely treating her as an outsider.

At the same time, people were busy coming in and out of the house, and the house was full of things less and less every day.Xiaoyue, who is in charge, came to send an order: Madam said, the whole house will be closed during the funeral.So let's check out the extravagant things in Aunt Xi's house.

"The things in this house are all the master's favorites during his lifetime, so you have to go with the master. You must take care and hand them over to the madam." Xiaoyue stood in the front room checking things, and at the same time was picky about the little girl who was doing things. "You two are rough-handed and thick-footed to move the pillow on this hill. Be careful with me. Everything here is worth thousands of dollars. If it breaks, you won't be able to pay for it if you sell your body!"

"Yes."

(End of this chapter)