Otaku man rotten goddess horse is the most annoying

Chapter 27 I Dislocated My Jaw With Guilt
1
The recent temperature has been erratic, hot and cold, and the uncle caught a cold smoothly.So he made himself a cold medicine, because it was too hot, he forgot to drink it, and when he found out, the medicine was as cold as the joke of "Funny Manga Hiyori".But the uncle is cheerful by nature, careless about trifles, and always picks it up and drank it down.

So his cold has not recovered yet.

To my relief, the uncle has recently become more connotative, and he always chooses some more in-depth works.Didn't the mainland introduce the famous red wine manga "Water Drops of God" recently, and he quickly bought a set.After I saw it, I said, "Do you like reading this kind of comics?" The uncle said, "This comic is tasteful and in-depth. Reading it can not only increase my knowledge, but also cultivate my temperament. Of course I like it. Besides. Red wine is a high-end drink belonging to the upper class, and this manga is also suitable for reading by upper class people..."

After finishing speaking, this upper-class man took "The Water Drop of God" and went to have a bowel movement.

2
As a boy, the most painful thing is to go shopping with your girlfriend.Xiaolu also loves to go shopping, so I often have to play the three identities of human, shelf and cash machine casually.However, Xiaolu is relatively frugal, she doesn't buy clothes lightly, and usually only makes a move when she sees some discounts in shopping malls.That day I went shopping in Paris with Xiaolu. When Xiaolu saw a piece of clothing, he asked the clerk: "Do you have any activities recently?" The clerk smiled and said, "Yes, we are going to sing K tonight."

...Thanks to this clerk, your natural stunned response relieved my fatigue.

3
It's so sad that "Forged Steel" is coming to an end soon!I just finished watching the penultimate episode that day, and I was so excited that I asked in the group, "Have you watched Ganglian?" But for a while, I accidentally beat "Ganglian" into an "anal fissure".Everyone was silent, and then someone replied: "I don't have an anal fissure, so I don't need to look."

4
A while ago, I published my first book of fairy tales... or a collection of campus fantasy novels, and its sequel will be published recently.Because I suddenly fell in love with the more concise writing style recently, I revised it for a long time after finishing the manuscript, and deleted [-] words, so the total number of words is slightly less than that of the first book.As a kind person, I am very disturbed by this, thinking that if readers spend the same amount of money to buy thinner books, will they think it is unscrupulous to reduce the volume without reducing the price?A friend comforted me after listening to my worries: "You should think of it this way. The first book is a big bonus for the opening, and the quantity will not increase. The second book will return to normal."

...what a positive thought!Then please support "Campus Genius Doctor Kang Xiaofu" -0-
5
Once, I took the initiative to wash the dishes after eating at Xiaolu's. Xiaolu was very moved when he saw it. He went up and hugged my waist and said, "I always feel that I am very unlucky. Being with you really makes me feel like I am capsized in the gutter." How does it feel?"

I "..." and asked, "Are you really trying to praise me?"

"Really." "Then you used the wrong word..."

"Ah! Isn't it commendable to capsize a boat in the gutter?"

"Actually, you want to say that the salted fish turned over..."

6
Sometimes when I was working on a manuscript at Xiaolu’s house, she would be very upset when she saw me hunched over and staring at the computer, and said, “This posture is so unhealthy, you have to sit still, come on.” I adjusted it, and Xiaolu said: "Aim your butt at the chair, sit upright. Don't bend your back too much, keep it upright. Keep your eyes away from the screen, not too close. Keep your hands well..."

With the help of Xiaolu, I finally took a posture that is not suitable for writing but very suitable for meditation.

7
Many parents will place their expectations on their sons in their names. Of course, sometimes it is just their own resentment. For example, once I saw a person whose name was "Jin Xinxin"... how short of money is your family!

8
My friend toilet is engaged in the tourism industry, and often has the opportunity to go abroad to appreciate the local customs and customs after work.One trip to Thailand, he went to see a famous ladyboy show under the instigation of his local colleagues. On the stage, there was a strange creature with indistinguishable gender, which was performing some strange performances that challenged the lower limit of human beings... It is said that the toilet was staggered at the time. left.His colleague asked him: "How is it? Did you lose confidence in women after watching this performance?" The toilet said, "Damn, I have lost confidence in human beings."

The toilet also often runs the Taiwan line.I remember when he went there for the first time, he specifically asked in the group how to say "eat" in Hokkien.So I told him that eating is pronounced "Jiasai".I don't know Hokkien, but after staying in Xiamen for two years, I learned a little bit.This Jiasai actually means...eating shit.I didn't expect the toilet to believe it at all!
Soon after, he came back with grief and indignation and complained: "You lied to me, Jiasai doesn't mean to eat!"

I asked, "How do you use it?"

Toilet said that when he met people during meal time, he would ask, "I'm going to get a plug, have you plugged it? Do you want to have a get together?" Then everyone looked at him with hatred.He is now disgraced and thrown across the strait!I heard it and said, "Forgive me, I didn't expect to cause trouble to you, I'm so guilty that my jaw is dislocated."

"That's a joke!" A friend pointed out sharply.

Speaking of which, the first time I knew that "plug" stands for excrement, my mood was actually very complicated, probably because I remembered "Macros"...

9
Xiaolu asked me to buy a skin care product called "Sekkisei", and asked me to search it on Taobao.Xiaolu said: "If you don't know which words it is, just type in the abbreviation, there must be some." So I entered "XJJ" in the search bar, and the three words that came out were: small penis.

...Even Taobao is unlikely to sell this!
The other abbreviation next to the little penis is called "Xiao Jiji", which is not bad at first glance, as cute as the names of fairy tale characters such as Pipiru, Lu Xixi, and Mao Kaka.But when I think of its homophony, I can't help but feel daunted.However, I accidentally searched the Internet and found that there are actually people named Xiao Jiji... One of them is quite a person of social status, I really want to know what kind of life he has had!

10
Every time I love a lifetime of wedding photography, I will see the beautiful figure of Fan Bingbing, their spokesperson of the year.Can't help but think of "My Fair Princess".It's not easy. At that time, Fan Bingbing played only a Qing Dynasty maid, but now she has changed her shot and become so beautiful, elegant and noble.On the big poster, she is wearing a pure white wedding dress, playing the role of a happy bride. She is both temperamental and romantic, which is really awesome.In contrast, Lin Xinru, who played Fan Bingbing's master at the time, is now in decline. The most frequently aired beer advertisement of hers shows her posing with a large wine bottle next to her. This advertisement is widely hung in many pubs, roadside stalls, and grocery stores.Once I passed a street full of Mala Tang, and Ruby Lin, who was sallow and emaciated from the oily smoke, was all along the way... she was a bar girl!Well, this can be regarded as a very common exposure...

11
Xiaolu suddenly asked me: "What do you mean by Sahuan?"

I said, "It's just having a lot of fun peeing."

"What about Sapo?"

"It's like peeing like splashing water."

Then I went to have fun.

12
On the bus, I heard a song by a local musician playing on the radio. It sang badly and the lyrics were disgusting. It made people want to smash the radio.When it was over, the singer actually had the face to ask the host: "What do you think of my song?" The host said: "I think this is a very abnormal song." There are not many hosts who are so frank.But then I found out that what you were talking about was passion... It's no use praising you.

(End of this chapter)