Otaku man rotten goddess horse is the most annoying

Chapter 31 Ahhh, Goodbye!childhood sweetheart!
1
A dish was served, and the waiter introduced that it was shark meat.

"Shark? Is that a very fierce shark?" I asked.

The waiter said yes.I said to Xiaolu at the same table with relief: "I heard that many unscrupulous merchants cut off the shark's fins and then discarded them in order to obtain shark fins. Those sharks can only drift in the sea miserably and die alone... Now that I've eaten their flesh, I've finally done something for them."

The little deer said: "But have you ever thought about it, maybe the shark you eat has not been finned yet."

What a sharp and brutal perspective...

2
Passing by a toilet on the bus, the signboard reads "Revitalize Public Toilets", and the first thing that comes to mind is a slogan: "Revitalize public toilets, everyone is responsible!" I wondered what the situation was?Everyone rushing in to shit and pee?When I came out, I called on others with righteous dignity: "Use excretion for the rise of China"... It's just a public toilet, don't rise to such a height!

There was also a National Day, passing by a nightclub, probably the nightclub was worried that business would be difficult on such a day, so they hung up a banner: "Nightlife is also patriotic!"... This far-fetched feeling is really hard for them...

3
In the park, while the deer and I were basking in the sun, we looked at some children playing on the grass with kind eyes.How cute they are.Among them, there is a little Zhengtai and a little loli who are very close, holding hands and being very affectionate.I sighed: "This is the childhood sweetheart." Xiaolu said: "Well, this is the childhood sweetheart!"

Then, I heard Mrs. Zheng say to Little Lolita: "Let's go pee together." Little Lolita said: "Yeah!" Then the pair of childhood sweethearts ran behind the bushes to urinate anywhere.

At that moment, there seemed to be an innocent big boy in my heart, crying "Ah, goodbye! My childhood sweetheart!"...

4
I have a little niece who is only two years old. She is babbling and innocent.When she usually watches TV, she learns a lot of advertising slogans, and reads them in a non-standard childish voice, which is very cute.Whenever there are many people in the family, her parents will encourage her to perform for everyone.This was the case again today, the little niece was hugged by her parents, kissing and asking: "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

The little niece said crisply: "Urology department-doctor-doctor-"

There was a dead silence at the scene, everyone was wondering why a young brat would have such a subtle intention to get a job.Then we saw an ad on TV with two cartoon ducks talking.The female duck said: "My husband, the Lun family really wants BB." The male duck said distressedly: "Oh! It seems that I have to go to the reproductive clinic of XX Hospital!" The female duck was elated and her eyes glowed: "Yes Ah! There is a special treatment for infertility there, and there are also a large number of elite urologists, let's go, quack!"

Maybe in the eyes of little loli, this is a cartoon...

5
I saw a group of ancient poems on the Internet that use "outside the long pavilion, beside the ancient road" as a fixed sentence pattern, such as "outside the long pavilion, beside the ancient road, a group of egrets go up to the blue sky."

I played with the deer:
Outside the long pavilion, by the side of the ancient road, the sun shines on the censer and emits purple smoke.

Outside the long pavilion, beside the ancient road, people only envy mandarin ducks but not immortals.

Outside the long pavilion, beside the ancient road, a thousand-mile marriage is linked by a thread.

Outside the long pavilion, beside the ancient road, spring rain is like wine and willows are like smoke.

Outside the long pavilion, beside the ancient road, others laughed at me for being too crazy.

...the possibilities are endless in this location!

6
He went there when the uncle’s unit organized an annual health checkup. When he came back, he proudly showed off to us: “The doctor praised my kidney quality as very good, one is better than the other two.”

I said, "Then you can consider selling a kidney when you have no money, anyway, you are worth two."

He listened to the case and said, "That's right! And I have to pay twice the price for the kidney that I sold, because one is worth two."

... This person seems to be serious.

7
Climbing mountains with Xiaolu, trekking long distances, is very hard.I asked Xiaolu, "Are you still able to walk?" Xiaolu said, "I'm so tired that I'm unconscious."

"Hold on."

"Oh, is it bitter or not? Think about the Red Army Two Hundred and Five."

"Well, you seem to be wrong, you are thinking about the [-] Red Army..."

"Ah, is it?"

"It seems that you are really delirious..."

8
I met a heroic girl, because she is graceful, young and beautiful, it is said that the total number of boyfriends has broken through the [-] mark!At the peak, she changed six boyfriends in one month!What an appetite.

I asked her, "Do you remember what your last boyfriend was called and what he looked like?"

She hesitated and said, "I don't remember clearly."

"What about the first boyfriend? The first one is more memorable, so you should remember it."

"Sorry, I just remembered he was a man." "..."

In fact, it is not bad to remember the other party's gender...

9
Chatting with Xiaolu, I don't know how to talk about Da Vinci.I said, "Actually Da Vinci is a big otaku!"

"Why do you say that?"

"Because he knows how to use 'moe'! Do you know who he is moe?"

"..."

"His cutie is a woman named 'Na Lisa'! He even drew a picture of her! Then in order to conceal his ambition, he named the picture 'Mona Lisa'!"

"...I don't want to talk to you at all."

10
Passing by a building, I looked up and saw a man cooking on the balcony.It was probably a small apartment, with clothes drying and a stove on the balcony.And among those hanging clothes, there are actually women's underwear...

After seeing the man who seemed to be cooking instant noodles, I said, "Single men are so sad."

Xiaolu said: "It may not be single, look at the women's underwear..."

"In fact, he stole it back and used it as a condiment. When cooking, just hold it and twist it on the pot, and there will be very delicious juice dripping into the dish, making it even more delicious. Give up! This is The life wisdom of our poor homeboys!"

"...Let's break up."

11
I wanted to write a manuscript of Takahashi Makoto, so I searched for his information on the Internet.The author is really not popular enough, and was actually searched for content like "Is Takahashi really starting a new serialization?"...

12
Said to Xiaolu: "Meow~" Xiaolu said: "Don't pretend to be cute." I said: "I am really cute."

Soon Xiao Lu asked, "Did you touch my computer just now?" I said, "Meow?" Xiao Lu said, "Don't play dumb." I said, "I'm so stupid."

13
The uncle was looking at the computer, and I asked, "What are you looking at?" He said, "Look at your sister." At this moment, a photo flashed past my eyes, and I said, "Hey, wait, the one on the photo Who is the man?" The uncle said, "Your sister!" I said, "My sister is not a man."

(End of this chapter)