Deyun: No.1 in Xiaozike, no refund

Chapter 295
After the laughter.

Qu Xiaoyun gave a thumbs up, and continued to praise: "The coat your grandfather wears is even more elegant, the fox's coat."

"What is Fox Crow?" Yang Jiulang asked curiously.

Qu Xiaoyun pointed to his collar, and explained: "The fur under the fox's neck is called Fox Crow. It is the warmest. This coat is made by Fox Crow!"

Yang Jiulang's eyes lit up: "Hey, this is worth the money."

Qu Xiaoyun nodded: "That's right, I also pay attention to the shoes I wear, chicken-skinned leather shoes!"

"Hahaha~~"

Yang Jiulang was speechless, and questioned: "I've never heard of it, how can chicken skin be used to make leather shoes?"

Qu Xiaoyun explained: "The crocodile skin is not fresh, but the chicken skin is fresh!"

"Oh."

Qu Xiaoyun was happy: "Good guy, the old man takes the money and goes out every night to find chickens."

"Hahaha~~"

"Applause!!!"

The audience laughed and booed.

"So awkward!" Yang Jiulang pouted.

Qu Xiaoyun didn't know the difference, and continued: "Hai Long's hat, Fox Crow's coat, chicken skin shoes, it's June!"

The audience in the audience burst out laughing.

Yang Jiulang shook his hands: "Good guy, you must have a heatstroke on the third day of June!"

"He's not wearing anything underneath!" Qu Xiaoyun raised his eyebrows and emphasized his tone.

"Hahaha~~"

Yang Jiulang stared and said, "Naked..."

Qu Xiaoyun nodded: "It's bare buttocks and a diaper inside."

"Okay!" Yang Jiulang pouted.

Qu Xiaoyun explained solemnly: "You don't know when to pee when you're old."

"Oh, that's true." Yang Jiulang nodded.

"Wearing this suit and walking outside is enviable to everyone. Mr. Yang is rich, and the old man sometimes stops when he walks." Qu Xiaoyun said that he spread his legs, and his attention was very concentrated.

"Hahaha~~"

The imitation was vivid, and the audience in the audience filled their brains with the picture, laughing hard.

Backstage.

After seeing this vivid imitation, Yu Qian also gave Qu Xiaoyun a point.

"What's wrong with peeing?" Yang Jiulang asked in surprise.

Qu Xiaoyun didn't speak, but shook his body with a relaxed expression.

"Hey, this is the end of peeing." Yang Jiulang curled his lips: "You really learned this well."

Qu Xiaoyun explained: "Because I met the old man while strolling on the street, sir, what is going on with this street, tell me about the history! Kid, this street is called..." Speaking of this Stretched legs did not move.

"Hahaha~~"

The audience was amused again.

"It's time to pee, it's too timely." Yang Jiulang said speechlessly.

Qu Xiaoyun nodded: "This street is called..."

With a look of disgust on his face, Yang Jiulang stretched out his hand to stop him: "You finish the chills first, then we'll talk about it."

After Qu Xiaoyun shuddered, he continued: "Rich, the old man is too rich, but there is one thing, no son."

"Hahaha~~"

Yang Jiulang stretched out his hand to stop him: "Wait a while, where did my father come from without a son?"

Qu Xiaoyun explained solemnly: "It wasn't there at that time, but your father came later!"

"Oh, you mean before." Yang Jiulang nodded.

Qu Xiaoyun went on to say: "Your grandfather is so worried, he is worried in the study room, the study room is resplendent and resplendent, it is all made of gold silk, and there is an ivory chair in the middle."

"It's so valuable!" Yang Jiulang's eyes lit up.

"The ivory chair is a whole piece of ivory!" Qu Xiaoyun said with emphasis.

"Hahaha~~"

"Where is this person sitting?" Yang Jiulang pouted.

Qu Xiaoyun sighed lightly: "People can't get up and down, so they have to find someone to pull it out."

"I've never heard of it!" Yang Jiulang pushed him angrily.

Qu Xiaoyun explained: "It means that the family is rich, and the house is full of valuable furniture, but looking at the money, the old man sat in the room and burst into tears."

"Why are you so sad?" Yang Jiulang asked curiously.

Qu Xiaoyun sighed and explained: "It's useless, I miss my old Yang's family, my great-grandfather was in the Qing palace back then, he was the most important person of the emperor, the number one appraiser of crane top red in the Qing Dynasty !"

The audience in the audience burst out laughing.

"The place to die!" Yang Jiulang curled his lips.

Qu Xiaoyun nodded: "He passed away on the first day he took office!"

"Hahaha~~"

"I came to live on the first day." Yang Jiulang said speechlessly.

Qu Xiaoyun continued: "There is also grandfather, who was killed by the devil when he was five years old!"

"Hahaha~~"

Yang Jiulang hastily stretched out his hand to stop him: "You wait a moment, if you die at the age of five, you won't have the branch behind!"

Qu Xiaoyun waved his hand: "The old man is in a hurry, just thinking about it."

"Nonsense!" Yang Jiulang pouted.

Qu Xiaoyun sighed lightly: "No matter how senior is, it's the most difficult to get to your grandfather!"

"What's the matter?" Yang Jiulang asked.

Qu Xiaoyun imitated: "What's the use of Wanguan's wealth? If you don't have a son, you are a dead family. The old man is crying, squeak~~"

Yang Jiulang stared and said, "It's not crying, it's peeing!"

"Hahaha~~"

Qu Xiaoyun shook his head: "I cried, eleven tears fell from both eyes!"

"Why are eleven tears falling from both eyes?" Yang Jiulang asked puzzled.

Qu Xiaoyun explained: "Your grandfather has big eyes."

"Your grandpa has big eyes!"

"Hahaha~~"

The two scolded on the stage and took to the street. The scene was very funny, which caused the audience to laugh again and again, and directly pushed the joyful atmosphere of the performance to a climax.

After the laughter.

Qu Xiaoyun went on to say: "Your grandfather is sitting in the room crying, worry, the maid is here."

"There are big families." Yang Jiulang praised.

Qu Xiaoyun stretched out four fingers: "Four servant girls, white chrysanthemums, pink chrysanthemums, green chrysanthemums, and yellow chrysanthemums."

"Hahaha~~"

"Good guy, all the maids are named this, how much I like chrysanthemums!" Yang Jiulang said speechlessly.

Qu Xiaoyun didn't know what was wrong, so he smiled slightly and continued to talk: "The four maids are watching outside, ouch, what's wrong with this old man who strips clothes?"

Yang Jiulang stretched out his hand to stop him: "Wait a minute, what do you mean by Master Stripping?"

Qu Xiaoyun explained: "I call your grandpa the master of stripping clothes because your grandpa likes to play jokes with maidservants and pick up other people's clothes when they meet!"

"Hahaha~~"

"This is a joke!" Yang Jiulang pouted.

"Just kidding!"

Qu Xiaoyun didn't care, and then said: "What's wrong with Mr. Stripping Clothes? Invite Madam, please invite Madam, as soon as you enter the door, your grandfather is struggling - what virtue am I lacking? Until now Not at all, I will die unjustly in this life!" Speaking of this, she raised her orchid finger.

Yang Jiulang glared and complained, "My grandpa is Dongfang Bubai, why did he change his orchid finger?"

"Hahaha~~"

Qu Xiaoyun didn't know the difference, and continued: "Your grandma just asked—why are you crying? Your grandpa cried——I don't have a son and a half now, so what's the use of you! My grandpa has gone, my grandpa is your grandpa's best friend."

"Oh, I really don't know about that."

Qu Xiaoyun patted his chest and imitated: "Your grandma started crying when she saw my grandpa, and my grandpa patted your grandma's chest to comfort her."

"Hahaha~~"

"Applause!!!"

The audience in the audience filled their brains with the picture, laughed and booed one after another.

Yang Jiulang pushed him, and said angrily, "I've never heard of it. Patting the chest to comfort him is like saying it! Patting the back!"

Qu Xiaoyun nodded: "Anyway, it's just for consolation. My grandfather said it doesn't matter. If you do good deeds, you will come down."

"You have to do something good." Yang Jiulang praised.

Qu Xiaoyun went on to say: "My grandfather gave me an idea, go to see a doctor first, and find out why there are no children!"

Yang Jiulang nodded: "Yes, I should go to the hospital."

"My grandfather picks up your grandma at seven o'clock every morning to see a doctor. He walks around for a day, and sends your grandma back at midnight."

"Huh? Send it back at twelve o'clock in the middle of the night?" Yang Jiulang asked incomprehensibly.

Qu Xiaoyun nodded: "Yes, let's go for a day, good guy, my grandpa will be gone in a month's time!"

"Is this tiring?" Yang Jiulang curled his lips.

"Hahaha~~"

The audience loves to hear this kind of burden, and they laughed and applauded.

Qu Xiaoyun hooked Yang Jiulang's shoulder, and said with a smile, "We are just like relatives!"

The audience was amused again.

"Fuck you!" Yang Jiulang pushed him away.

Qu Xiaoyun continued: "Anyway, I seek medical advice everywhere every day. In the end, my grandfather said that there will be a temple fair in Miaofeng Mountain on April [-]."

"Oh, open the temple."

"Is the old lady here to tie the doll?"

"The old days paid attention to this." Yang Jiulang praised.

Seeing that many viewers were confused, Qu Xiaoyun explained: "There is no such thing now. In the past, Jincheng was the Heavenly Harem, and the capital was Shangmiaofeng Mountain. The couple got married and had no children. They went to the temple to kowtow to the old lady for blessings. , There are dolls made of mud in the temple, and one is tied around the neck with a red string and one is taken home. After arriving home, many people are amazed, and they have children when they go back."

Yang Jiulang gave a thumbs up: "Look, it's such a coincidence."

Qu Xiaoyun nodded: "I gave birth to Xing Er, bring this clay doll Xing Da."

"Yes, this is the uncle."

Qu Xiaoyun explained in detail: "Jincheng calls this Big Brother Baby, and both Jinjing and Beijing believe in this, and the old lady who tied the baby is different from the old lady. The one in Jincheng is Mazu, and the one in Beijing is Bixia Yuanjun. , although not the same, but the function is the same.”

"Yes." Yang Jiulang nodded.

"People in the capital believe this, and the temple fair on April [-]th must start at the end of April!"

"Why so early?" Yang Jiulang asked curiously.

Qu Xiaoyun explained: "In order to get there first!"

"Let people know piety." Yang Jiulang suddenly realized.

Qu Xiaoyun went on to say: "Get ready, everything is packed, your grandpa, your grandma, and my grandpa will go to Miaofeng Mountain by car. When you get off at Miaofeng Mountain, you can see how high the mountain is. It's quite far!"

"That's not it."

Qu Xiaoyun imitated the situation at that time and said: "There are two creepers carrying it, let your grandma sit on this, your grandma sits on the head, my grandpa supports this pole, and follows the same one, your grandpa is lazy—oh, my waist is sore and my legs hurt, Go ahead. My grandpa will escort your grandma up the mountain."

"Oh."

"It's dawn, and when we arrived at the ground, my grandfather helped your grandma to go to the temple. The temple got the news that the wife of the rich man has come! The old monk personally helped your grandma to go in and kowtow to the old lady."

"Huh."

"Kneel down there, your grandma is very pious—the old lady, give me death!"

"Hahaha~~"

"Giving me a death is justified, that's called giving me a son!" Yang Jiulang stared.

Qu Xiaoyun chuckled and changed his words: "Slip of tongue, I kowtowed there after I made my wish, and the monk was chanting scriptures beside me, chanting the scriptures for increasing blessings and longevity to my son."

"Okay."

"I don't know how to read the scriptures. After reading, your grandma took out a red string from her arms. There are dolls next to the statue of the old lady. Your grandma is tied with a red string. Which one is better?" Qu Xiaoyun Touching his chin, his eyes swept left and right.

"You have to choose!" Yang Jiulang praised.

Qu Xiaoyun nodded, gesturing to shake the rope.

"Hahaha~~"

"What's wrong with my grandma being a cowboy!" Yang Jiulang said angrily.

Qu Xiaoyun didn't know the difference, and continued, "I have to look for it! Hey, there is a doll in the corner here. This doll is so beautiful, white as jade, with big ears facing her arms, burning her head with a cigarette in her mouth."

"Hahaha~~"

As long as Yu Qian's burden is mentioned, it will ring true.

Yang Jiulang was also amused: "Hey, why do you look so much like Teacher Yu?"

"The old lady loves this. She tied it up and picked it up. My grandpa went out with her. Just after leaving the temple, your grandpa came up."

"Good guy, it's too slow." Yang Jiulang curled his lips.

"Go home, your grandma will be pregnant soon after you go home."

"Look at Duo Ling." Yang Jiulang gave a thumbs up.

"Sincerely moved the heaven and the earth, and gave birth to a fat boy once she was conceived in October."

"It's my father." Yang Jiulang praised.

"Oh, your grandpa was so happy that he lifted the child up and took the lamp to shine on him."

"What is this for?" Yang Jiulang asked curiously.

Qu Xiaoyun explained: "Folk legend, if there is a shadow on the wall with a lamp, you can see how deep or shallow the shadow is."

"What's wrong with deep and shallow?"

"It is said that the shadow represents the soul of a person. There is a saying in the past about how the soul is and whether the child is rich or not."

"Oh, look at the depth of the shadow." Yang Jiulang nodded half understanding.

Qu Xiaoyun gave a thumbs up: "Take a light to shine on your grandpa, he was overjoyed, this child is good, the shadow is shallow and doesn't have such a big turbidity."

"Oh."

"As expected, he will be able to speak in six months."

"Amazing, it's early enough!" Yang Jiulang said in surprise.

"Seven months will sow discord."

"Good guy, skewer your wife's tongue!" Yang Jiulang curled his lips.

"The neighbors in the neighborhood are afraid of this child. The half-year-old child has gone to the street to provoke divorce from five or six families." Qu Xiaoyun said in an emphatic tone.

"Yo, this is annoying!"

"There are no such good children, but there is one thing, don't call them mom and dad."

"Look at this thing."

Qu Xiaoyun imitated the situation at that time and said: "I'm angry with his father, teary, and he doesn't call me if he has a child. It's so nice to call him dad. I endured it every day until I was one and a half years old. The old man really insisted. No more, get the whole family together."

"Have a meeting." Yang Jiulang said.

"Everyone, sit down. The old man has spoken. My son can ask you something. If you say you can't speak, no one will believe you. There are no complete families in our alley."

"It's all broken by instigation." Yang Jiulang praised.

Qu Xiaoyun nodded: "Yes, I was provoked by you, and Kaitianbidi is not as annoying as you, but there is one thing, why don't you call me for being eloquent?"

"correct."

"There must be a reason for doing this, can you tell me why?"

"Tell me." Yang Jiulang praised.

"The child is happy, I can't shout, I have a hunch that whoever shouts will die if he agrees!" Qu Xiaoyun said with an accentuated tone.

"It's broken." Yang Jiulang curled his lips.

Qu Xiaoyun patted his chest, and said: "Your grandfather patted his chest, and you shouted, and I will admit it! Try it!"

"How to try?" Yang Jiulang asked curiously.

Qu Xiaoyun played the second role, and imitated: "Call the cook at home, the chef's surname is Zhao, you call him Uncle Zhao! What a surprise, the child opened his mouth and called-Uncle Zhao! The cook responded, poof! "

"What does this mean?" Yang Jiulang didn't understand.

Qu Xiaoyun explained: "The cook spit blood, the roof of the house was red, and the dead body fell to the ground."

"Really dead?" Yang Jiulang was surprised.

Qu Xiaoyun nodded: "Everyone in the house is stupid, but your grandpa is not afraid, call the gardener! The gardener's surname is Li, and his name is Uncle Li! The gardener also died after the child was called, just this time, my grandpa Come in."

"Why do you always have him!" Yang Jiulang looked disgusted.

Qu Xiaoyun imitated the situation at that time and said: "Oh, the whole family is here! Your father stood up with a grin on his face—son, call Dad! Your grandma's face turned pale—don't stop, you can't You can't shout!"

Yang Jiulang nodded: "That's right, you can shout whatever you want!"

Qu Xiaoyun went on to say: "Your grandpa doesn't agree—no, call Dad! My grandpa is sweating!"

The audience in the audience burst out laughing.

"Why is your grandfather sweating!" Yang Jiulang said angrily.

Qu Xiaoyun didn't know the difference, and continued: "Your father was so stunned, he yelled, my dear father!"

"And then?" Yang Jiulang said calmly, as if he had seen through everything.

Qu Xiaoyun laughed: "Guess what happened?"

"Don't do this! Is your grandfather dead?" Yang Jiulang stared.

Qu Xiaoyun smiled and waved his hands: "No, my grandfather is not dead."

"What's going on?" Yang Jiulang asked curiously without guessing.

Qu Xiaoyun laughed: "A monk died in Miaofeng Mountain!"

"I'll fuck you!" Yang Jiulang pushed with a smile.

"Hahaha~~"

"it is good!!!"

The audience did not expect this reversal, and they laughed and gave warm applause.

There is no doubt that today's opening was a success.

……

(End of this chapter)