Calm: Be a calm woman

Chapter 5 Indifferent to fame and wealth—a calm woman understands that if she is indifferent, she will not be burdened by material desires (1)
It is undeniable to say that fame and fortune will always be accompanied in life, 99.99% of people are chasing fame and fortune, of course, female friends are no exception.In fact, as long as we have the "Tao" to obtain it, there is nothing shameful in itself. Unfortunately, many women are too utilitarian, and as a result, they fall into the quagmire of desire and cannot extricate themselves.If you don't want to be burdened by fame and fortune, it's simple: the more serious it is, the greater the harm; the lighter it is, the greater the benefit.Leo Tolstoy told us: "The less you want, the happier you will be in life."

Greed makes you fall into the abyss of desire

Ladies, in the face of this extremely prosperous world, you must keep in mind one sentence, that is, "Greed is like candy. Although it is delicious, it can make you feel excited for a while, but it will rot your teeth and make your teeth go away. The joy fades away."Greed is undoubtedly the most terrible slow poison in the world. Before you know it, it will eat away at your heart, making it full of holes and miserable.Once you allow greed to settle in your heart, you are insulated from happiness.

If a person is greedy, he will have unsatisfied desires, so he will try his best to pursue endless things.Driven by greed, people become tireless.If women are enslaved by greed, they will end up exhausted and hopeless on the road of life.

There is a story in Indian Buddhism about a very filial Buddhist who knew the magic.After the mother passed away, Buddhists cared about their mother very much, so they used magic power to see the mother in another world.He was sad to find that his mother had turned into a hungry ghost, skinny and boneless.He wanted very much to get something for his mother to eat, but there was nothing he could do.In order to relieve his mother, he no longer gave her food in vain, because those things turned to ashes as soon as they touched his hands, and her mother couldn't eat them at all.Under the guidance of an expert, he purified the mother's soul, which finally liberated the mother's soul.In fact, these hungry ghosts are like those greedy people in life. Driven by desire, no matter how much they get, they still don't know how to be satisfied.The only way to truly liberate them is to purify their hearts and reduce their desires so that they can be satisfied.

In real life, many people are experiencing this kind of hungry ghost life.The feeling of wanting something and not having it is really frustrating.However, instead of complaining, we should reflect on whether we are asking too much.Whether it is spiritual or material, we should limit our desires within a reasonable range, so that our lives will be happy.

By chance, I heard a story about a desert traveler from Dr. Siruk.A group of people went to the desert to pan for gold. After going through all kinds of difficulties and dangers and finally found the gold mine, they were all ecstatic, and almost everyone filled their bodies with gold.On the way back, fatigue quickly turned their ecstasy into depression, for the gold was so heavy.Among the peers, there was only one person walking easily and happily, and soon he was far ahead of the others.The companion was puzzled and asked him why he didn't feel tired. His answer was very simple: "It's easier to have a little less." In front of gold, people's greedy nature is fully revealed, and many people are dragged down by desire, so that they cannot reach the journey end point.

A woman committed suicide in a hotel with ridiculous reasons: "I am very unhappy because I don't know what else to miss in my life. I don't understand why God gave me beauty but took it away. A lot of other things that should belong to me. I married a businessman, and I don't like him at all. He not only doesn't know how to be sympathetic, but also scolds me for being too greedy. He is too stingy. Shouldn't a beauty like me have more How many fur coats and jewelry? I have nothing but beauty, which is a great irony. No one knows the pain in my heart, no one knows how hard it is to live in such pain. So, I choose to go back to heaven, only There, I can get everything I want to match my beauty."

A beautiful woman with a merchant husband who chose to take her own life simply because she didn't get more jewelry and fur coats.So, what about those women who are neither beautiful nor struggling in poverty?Judging from the content of the suicide note, the reason for the woman's suicide was simply ridiculous. She was still obsessed with not regretting until she lost her most precious life.She could have had a good life, but because of her never-ending desires, her life fell into despair and her heart was exhausted.

Of course, greed is not limited to material things, but refers to the attitude of never being satisfied with something.Man is born free, but greed takes away our freedom and makes us slaves driven by desire.Once we are enslaved by desires, we completely lose our freedom and the joy of life.Smart women know how to control their own desires and make themselves the masters of their desires, so as to truly dominate their lives.

Don't be hard-pressed by your salary
Living in modern society, work has almost become a part of modern life.In the face of work, many people are always exhausted and full of complaints.Is work really exhausting?In fact, it is not the work itself that makes people tired, but the burnout that the work brings to people.In a sense, this burnout is not because the work itself is tiring, but because people are not interested in the work they are doing.

As an ordinary clerk in a company, Alice lives a step-by-step life every day.Logically speaking, Alice's work is not heavy, but Alice is exhausted every day when she comes home.After a day of work, she not only had a headache and back pain, but also felt nauseous, had no appetite, and just wanted to go to bed quickly.Looking at the exhausted Alice, the mother felt very distressed, and carefully cooked her favorite dishes for her.However, as soon as Alice sat down at the dinner table, her boyfriend called and asked her to dance.I don't know if this call has magical powers, but Alice seems to be a different person in an instant.She took a few mouthfuls of food, then hurried upstairs, put on a beautiful evening dress, and went to the dance floor.She seemed to have completely forgotten the fatigue of work, and played until 3 o'clock in the morning before returning home excitedly.Because of the excitement, she didn't fall asleep for a long time.

What made Alice tired?Could it be that Alice's previous fatigue was faked.The reality is that Alice's fatigue is real, but her fatigue is not physical fatigue, but mental boredom.Therefore, when her boyfriend asked her to go dancing, she immediately showed full interest, so her fatigue disappeared, and she was alive and well in an instant.It can be seen that it is the burnout of work that makes Alice exhausted.

Many people, like Alice, feel exhausted due to emotional fluctuations, which is obviously different from physical exhaustion.Many years ago, the famous psychologist Dr. Joseph Barmock has already verified this through experiments.

One year, I went alone to vacation at Lake Louise in the Canadian Rockies.In order to fish, I trekked mountains and rivers at an altitude of 7000 kilometers. After a long journey of eight hours, I finally arrived at Coral Bay.Just imagine, walking alone for eight hours must be very tiring, right?But I was full of energy. Along the way, I kept telling myself: "I will catch a fat big trout with my own hands soon!" Because of excitement and expectation, I didn't feel tired at all.Let's think about it from another angle. If what is waiting for me is something I don't want to do, then, after these eight hours of walking, what will happen to me?Maybe you can't stick to the destination at all, maybe you will be tired when you reach the destination.From this matter, it is not difficult for us to know that we should choose what we are interested in doing instead of forcing ourselves to do work we don't like.Otherwise, we can easily fall into the cycle of burnout.

In a sense, for a woman, choosing the right career is as important as choosing a happy marriage, because both things can make a woman feel happy.Once the wrong choice is made, it will also destroy the beautiful life of a woman in the future.When looking for a job, many women are very confused. They don't know what their interests are, and they don't know what they can do or want to do.In fact, there is a general rule to follow, and that is to choose the job that interests you the most.In the fields we are interested in and in the fields we are good at, we can easily make achievements, so it will be easy and pleasant to work.

It should be noted that at no time should you work for a salary, let alone force yourself to do a job you don't like in pursuit of a high salary.Otherwise, not only will nothing be gained, but precious life will be wasted.Mr. David Coulee, an American tire manufacturer, once said: "If you like the job you do, then even if you work long hours, you will enjoy it like playing a game, and you will never feel bored." Mrs. Carl, the personnel manager of DuPont, once said: "Today, many young people don't know what they want to do. I think this is the greatest tragedy in the world. If a person works just to get a salary, then he can do it in other ways." There will be no gain."

As a woman, when choosing a job, she should be as cautious as choosing a father for her child, because these two choices are most related to the happiness of a woman's life.Before choosing a job, we can consult a career consultant first, and then make a choice according to our actual situation.In addition, when choosing a career, don't follow suit, let alone get together.Many popular occupations are often highly competitive, so as long as you are interested, sometimes unpopular careers may be a better choice.After choosing a good career, before entering, you must fully understand the industry through various channels.As the saying goes, if you know yourself and the enemy, you will never be imperiled in a hundred battles.You can only succeed if you are prepared.

After reading the above content, as a female friend, I believe you already have a good idea of ​​your career choice.So, start planning and put it into action!As long as you enter the right industry and find the right career direction, you will be getting closer and closer to success and happiness!
money is not everything in life

Facing this bustling world, most people's troubles are related to money.Even so, many people are unable to handle their relationship with money rationally and rationally, so they have more and more troubles.Regarding money, everyone's troubles are different. It is difficult to understand and solve this problem thoroughly. However, we still have to make some efforts to try to figure out the real relationship between our happiness and money.Although I can't fully understand this question just like everyone else, at least I can consult relevant authorities and experts so that you can get some help, or at least tell you where you can get help.

Although many people think that their money-related troubles are caused by not having enough money, they wishfully believe that if their income increases by 10%, then their financial problems will be solved.Of course, sometimes this is true. After all, a penny is hard for a hero, and more money is always easier to do.However, this is not always the case.In life, although some people have more money as they wished, their troubles have not decreased, but unexpectedly increased.

As a financial expert, one of the important tasks of Mrs. Elsie Stapleton, who has been a financial consultant for Wanamaker's department store for a long time, is to help those employees who are deeply troubled by money as a personal consultant.She has helped many people, ranging from corporate executives earning more than $10 a year to bellboys earning less than $1000 a year.During her long career, Mrs. Stapleton has accumulated many valuable experiences.Regarding the relationship between money and life, she told me very positively: "For most people in life, earning more money cannot solve their financial troubles at all." It can often be found that after a family's income increases, instead of really improving its living standards, it also adds many unexpected troubles.

As a senior person, Mrs. Stapleton said: "Most people don't know that their troubles are not because of lack of money, but because they don't know how to spend reasonably!" Seeing this sentence, perhaps many women They will all dismiss this.What I have to admit is that maybe you can consume reasonably, but there must be many people around you who can't consume reasonably!There are still many unconvinced readers who may complain: "If I put you in my position and let you pay high bills with a meager salary and live a heavy life, you won't be able to stand and talk without back pain. Maybe you can’t do as well as me!” Indeed, every family has its own situation, but there is no doubt that managing money and spending reasonably should be learned and mastered by everyone.

Everyone must admit that life is difficult. I think that most people in life have tasted the hardships and helplessness of life.Once, I had to work 10 hours a day in the cornfields and barns in Missouri, and I had to keep going even when my back hurt.And compared with what I pay, the remuneration of less than 5 cents per hour seems so insignificant.Once, I had to live in a house without a bath for 20 years; once, I had to lie in a bedroom at minus 15 degrees to survive the long winter.At that time, to save a dime for the car fare, I had to travel far on foot, and even worn out the soles of my shoes; because I had no money to send my clothes to be ironed, I had to fold my pants and press them under the mattress ...

Although life is so hard, I still try to save part of the money.Otherwise, my heart will be deeply disturbed.It is precisely because of this experience that I know that in order to live better and have a little surplus, I should draw up a plan for my expenses and then consume reasonably according to the plan.However, many people in life don't understand this simple truth. Even if they know it, they don't care about it, and they don't even want to do it.All this is because they don't know the importance of doing so.

My good friend Simon King told me about an accountant who was very shrewd in dealing with the finances of his job but was a fool when it came to his own finances.Whenever he pays his salary, he will go to the shopping mall with a bulging wallet to spend, without hesitation to buy those luxury items that are dispensable to him, regardless of how many bills and miscellaneous living expenses he still has need to pay.Because of this, although he is very good at work, his life is like a mess, very bad.Regarding such phenomena, Simon King said: "When people deal with money, they always appear to be unexpectedly blind."

If people could be more prudent and rational in dealing with their personal money problems, there would be far fewer money-related worries in people's lives.Even if incomes do not increase, people will live happier lives.

Life cannot be kidnapped by luxury

Extravagance is a very bad habit, it will corrode a person's heart, make people become selfish, vain, depraved, and even lose their original good nature.Do not pursue that luxurious life, but fully enjoy the happiness that has been obtained.Remember, luxury is a vice, keep it out of your life.

(End of this chapter)