Fall in love with school, no longer tire of learning

Chapter 26 Family Education Guidance (1)
Family education that cannot be ignored

As an important form of education, family education has been produced since the family was produced in human society.Together with school education and social education, family education constitutes all the education received by human beings.Because it is carried out among family members, this determines its initial nature, persistence and the intimacy of the relationship between the teacher and the trainee.Naturally, family education has a great influence on people.Throughout history, we can see that good family education benefits people for life, while bad family education naturally delays life.

The impact of not paying attention to family education: students' grades fluctuate greatly; the relationship with classmates is tense; it is easy to be extreme and partial.

The school's education looks perfect and comprehensive.However, doesn't the school hold parent-teacher meetings every once in a while?This shows that family education is also very important and an integral part of school education.

At the Two Sessions, the state attached great importance to the education of students' emotional intelligence, which is to be cultivated through family education.

The family is the window to cultivate students' souls, and the school is the place to cultivate scientific and cultural knowledge. Imagine that you have a lot of scientific and cultural knowledge, but you can't use it because of psychological problems, and you will easily fail in the exam.

Comparison of home education and school education:

(1) A teacher has to educate multiple students at the same time, and the degree of attention is not as good as two at home, or even multiple people pay attention to one student.

(2) School education is mainly the education of scientific and cultural qualities, while family education is the education of outlook on life and values.The impact of the latter on children is more important than the latter.If there is no correct outlook on life, world outlook, and values, no amount of scientific and cultural quality can benefit society, but may endanger society!For example, some terrorists can make missiles and fly planes, but with knowledge they can endanger society.

Since ancient times, the issue of family education has attracted people's attention. Like the requirements for a good wife and mother in ancient times, "a husband and a child" is an important requirement.In addition, many famous families have left many books and cases of family training.

Family training is also an important part of the family tree, which has played a great role in traditional clan education.

In ancient times, human society experienced the changes of clans, families, and families, but these are the cornerstones of a country.

When the country is unstable and the laws of the country are not clear, family precepts can exert the power to stabilize social order.Because, in order to maintain the necessary legal system, the family draws up the necessary code of conduct to restrain the members of the family. This is the earliest origin of family law and family precepts.

Since the beginning of the Han Dynasty, family precepts have gradually become more and more colorful with the evolution of dynasties.Many famous aphorisms about family management and parenting are recorded in the genealogy, which have become good family management strategies that people adore and a model of "self-cultivation" and "family harmony".For example, the frugal housekeeping thought of "one porridge and one meal, think about the hard-won", still has positive meaning today.In the genealogy, there are many family precepts and family rules recorded in detail for the descendants to follow.Among them, the most admirable famous precepts, such as Yan's family precepts and Zhu Zi's family maxims, are still popular today.The reason why family precepts are valued by the world is that its main purpose is to promote loyalty, filial piety and righteousness, and to teach propriety, righteousness, integrity and shame.In addition, what is advocated and what is prohibited is also an important content in family rules and family laws, such as "frugality should be respected", "witches should be forbidden", etc.

Family education is studied as a subject, which is what happened in our country in these years.This is a problem that must be involved in the development of the times, the demand for talents, and the improvement of the overall quality of the people.

Human education is a systematic educational project, which includes family education, social education, and collective (kindergarten, school) education. The three are interrelated and organically combined, influencing, interacting, and restricting each other. , this educational project cannot be separated from any one item, but in this overall project, family education is the basis of all education.

Suhomlinski, a famous educator in the former Soviet Union, once compared children to a piece of marble. He said that it takes six sculptors to shape this piece of marble into a statue: ① family; ② school; ③ the collective where children belong; ④ The child himself; ⑤ books; ⑥ accidental factors.

From the order of arrangement, the family is listed first. It can be seen that the family plays a very important role in the process of shaping children, and occupies a very important position in the heart of this educator.Therefore, it is very necessary for parents to understand the importance of family education.

Family education has a long way to go

On February 1992, 2, the "Outline of China's Children's Development Plan in the 16s" announced by the State Council stated:

"Today's children are the masters of the 21st century. The bottom-up protection and development of children is the basis for improving the quality of the population and the prerequisite for human development. The healthy growth of children is related to the future and destiny of the motherland. Improving the quality of the whole nation, from Children grab it."

And proposed: "In 2000, the parents of 90% of children (under the age of 14) should master the knowledge of childcare and education to varying degrees."

This goal makes it clear that the parents in the family shoulder the important task of cultivating talents for the country in the 21st century.Whether or not this generation of children can be cultivated into people with all-round development of morality, intelligence, physique, beauty and labor is a century-old plan that is related to whether the country has successors.

The German educator Froebel also said: "The fate of the country is not so much in the hands of those in power, but in the hands of mothers." role in children.Parents must first clarify the principle that the direction of education is consistent with the interests of the country and the needs of the people. They should not regard children as private property. They must establish the idea of ​​​​teaching children for the country and correct the purpose of education.

Froebel
What will happen to China in the 21st century? Take Deng Xiaoping's words to say that my country should reach the level of a moderately developed country by the middle of the 21st century, with a per capita income of US$4000 and an annual GNP of US$6 trillion. People in the 21st century should be a new generation of all-round development with good ideology, noble moral sentiments, sound psychological quality, active cooperation with others, strong adaptability, and hard work.If there is no such a group of high-quality builders in the 21st century, it will be difficult to complete this task. Possessing such qualities cannot be achieved overnight, and good family education is a necessary condition for cultivating high-quality people. .

Enlightenment of tutoring

Family education, as the name suggests, refers to the process in which fathers, mothers and other adults in the family, such as grandparents, grandparents, uncles and aunts, educate minors.

The goal of family education is to ensure children's physical and mental health before they enter the society to receive collective education (kindergarten and school education), and to lay a solid foundation for later kindergarten and school education.After the child enters the kindergarten and school, the family cooperates with the kindergarten and the school so that the moral, intellectual, physical, aesthetic and labor aspects can be fully developed.

The focus of family education is moral education, cultivating children's good moral character and developing good behavior habits. Behavior habits include living habits, work habits, study habits, etc., and teach children how to "be a human being".

Because family education takes place in the family, compared with kindergarten, school education, and social education, it has many characteristics. These characteristics make family education the starting point and basis of educating people, and it has advantages that other education does not have.

The family is the cradle of children and the first place where babies receive education after birth. That is to say, the family is the first classroom in life; parents are children's first teachers, that is, teachers of enlightenment.

Therefore, the education given by parents to children has the most early and enlightening characteristics.Generally speaking, after 3 years of development after birth, a child enters the early childhood period, and 3 to 6 years old is the preschool age, which is often referred to as the early education stage. This is an important period for human physical and mental development.

There is an old Chinese proverb: "Dyeing in green will make you green, dyeing in yellow will make you yellow." This proverb is similar to "the one who is close to vermilion is red, and the one who is close to ink is black".Early childhood is the beginning of the gradual edification of life. Many basic abilities of a person are formed at this age, such as language expression, basic movements, and certain living habits. Personality is also gradually formed at this time.

American psychologist Bloom believes that if a person's intellectual development is counted as 17% at the level he reached at the age of 100, then it will reach 4% at the age of 50, and it will increase by 4% at the age of 8 to 30, and 8% at the age of 17 to 20. 5 gets another [-]%.It can be seen that children before the age of [-] are the period of the fastest intellectual development, and it is also the best period for early intellectual development. If parents implement good family education during this period, it will be the key to the early intellectual development of students.

Goethe
Throughout the ages, many people with lofty ideals and effective celebrities received good family education in their childhood, which is an important reason for their future success.

For example, the success of the great German writer Goethe benefited from the early education of the family.When Goethe was 2 to 3 years old, his father took him to the countryside for field trips to observe nature and cultivate Goethe's observation ability. When he was 3 to 4 years old, his father taught him to sing, recite songs, and tell fairy tales, and intentionally let him speak in front of everyone to cultivate his oral English ability.These conscious education made Goethe optimistic, willing to think and good at learning since he was a child.When Goethe was 8 years old, he could read various books in French, German, English, Italian, Latin, and Greek. At the age of 14, he wrote a play. At the age of 25, he wrote "The Sorrows of Young Werther", which is famous in Europe in one month.

The growth process of celebrities such as Wang Xizhi and Wang Xianzhi, who were famous as "father and son calligraphers" in ancient times, Edison, a great inventor with more than 1350 inventions, Guo Moruo, Mao Dun, a generation of literary superstars, etc., shows that family education is very important for early intellectual development.

On the contrary, there are many examples of people not getting good family education in their childhood and affecting the normal development of intelligence.For example, Kamala, the "wolf boy" in India, was taken away by wolves when he was a child, and was discovered when he was 8 years old. However, his living habits are already different from those of humans. His living habits are almost the same as those of wolves, crawling on all fours, eating raw meat, and walking at night. Later, after artificial training, he could stand up after 2 years, walk like a person after 6 years, and learned 4 words within 6 years. When he was 17 years old, his intelligence level only reached the level of a 3-year-old student.

In addition, according to the "China Women's Daily", a worker surnamed Ma in Nanjing City, my country, suffered from mental illness and was afraid that his children would be persecuted. He locked his three children at home and prevented them from contacting the outside world. For more than 3 years, these children have low intelligence and slow speech. Compared with their peers, their intelligence and living ability are very different, and they are close to idiots. Therefore, the early role of family education cannot be ignored.

Continuity of tutoring

Another characteristic of family education is continuity.After the child is born, from childhood to adulthood, about 2/3 of the time lives in the family, and from morning to night, they are directly or indirectly receiving education from their parents.

This kind of continuous family education is carried out intentionally and unintentionally, planned and unplanned, consciously and unconsciously. No matter in what way and when the education is carried out, it is the parents who influence the children with their own words and deeds anytime and anywhere. Educating children.This kind of education constantly influences and demonstrates students' living habits, moral conduct, manners of speech, etc. It has a subtle effect and is accompanied by a person's life. Educators call parents lifelong teachers.

This kind of continuous lifelong education often reflects the family tradition of a family. The quality of the family tradition often lasts for several generations, even more than a dozen or dozens of generations. related to the profession.Such as "Xinglin Family", "Liyuan Family", "Education Family" and so on.

At the same time, the family style reflects the style of study of a family, and the quality of the style of study often lasts for several generations, a dozen generations, or dozens of generations.For example, in modern China, Yan Gong, a native of Wuxi, supplemented the Selected Records of Guochaoguan in the late Qing Dynasty. According to the statistics, there were 30 champions from the Bingxu Division in the third year of Shunzhi in the Qing Dynasty to the Jiachen Division in the 114th year of Guangxu. For example, the three surnames Miao, Wu, and Pan in Suzhou, the two surnames Weng and Jiang in Changshu, and the two surnames Chen and Cha in Haining, Zhejiang.

It is not difficult to see that the continuity of family education often has an important impact on the rise of talent groups.This situation was more prominent in ancient and modern times, but in contemporary times, with the development of science, the needs of society, and the increase in unemployed people, people can choose a wide range of jobs. It is impossible for all members of a family to be engaged in the same job, but there are many Seeing this situation, that is, some family members have repeatedly made achievements and received commendations at work, while some family members have committed crimes one after another.This has a lot to do with the continuity of family education.

The authority and appeal of family affection

The authority of family education is incidental, mainly referring to the power and power shown by parents and other elders as educators in children.Different from compulsory education in schools or fee-paying contract education, the existence of the family determines the blood relationship, nurturing relationship, and emotional relationship between parents and children. Children have a great dependence on their parents and elders in terms of ethics and material life needs. , The consistency of the fundamental interests of family members all determine that parents have a greater restrictive effect on their children.

Because of this authority, parents' education is easy to be accepted and obeyed by children. Parents' reasonable use of this feature is very beneficial to the formation of children's good moral character and behavior habits.This is especially true for young children.When young children are playing and playing with other children, when there is a dispute, they often quote their parents' words to prove that their speech and behavior are correct, such as they like to say: "My father said so" or "My mother said that." do" and so on.

The authority established by parents in the minds of children determines how children will view and receive education in kindergarten schools and society in the future.The relationship between children and their parents is an important social relationship that children first face.In this relationship, almost all aspects of social ethics and morality are reflected. If there are cracks and defects in this relationship, then the child will go to society in the future, and it will be reflected in various interpersonal relationships.The reason for emphasizing the importance of parental authority is also because parents always play a dual role in children's childhood: parents are not only the protectors of children's safe survival, but also the guides of life enlightenment.

The effect of parental education depends on the degree of parental authority established.However, it should be noted that the establishment of parental authority must be based on respecting the personality of the child, not on the feudal patriarchal system. Wise parents understand the importance of establishing authority, and understand that the establishment of authority is not based on suppression, force, and subjective Instead of making assumptions, adopt a method of combining hardness and softness.For unwise parents, the greater the authority, the greater the negative impact on children.

Both parents should first coordinate and cooperate with each other in the attitude of educating their children. They should be lenient when they are lenient, and strict when they should be strict. They should establish a kind and majestic image in front of their children, so that children can easily accept their parents' education.

The kinship of homeschooling is contagious.As the saying goes: "Blood is thicker than water." The blood relationship and kinship relationship between parents and children are natural and inseparable, so that parents' emotions have a strong infectious effect on children.Children often understand their parents' words and deeds and empathize with each other.

(End of this chapter)