Amara – Reunion
Chapter 205 - The Talk
Author's note: this is from Duke's point of view
- - -
I enjoyed our current situation. Serina existed in my embrace and our hearts were beating as one.
However, I was painfully aware that there are few things we need to clear up before moving forward. If we don't, we will risk going back to where we were yesterday, and last year, and three years before, and I couldn't live another day without Serina in my life.
I needed to explain what happened so that she doesn't doubt me in the future.
"Serina…", I called, and she nodded lazily in response. Did she fall asleep? "Are you with me?"
"Absolutely."
I loved her answer, almost how much I love her. Is this a good time for a love confession? I should probably leave that for later.
"Serina, we need to talk." I forced the words out of my mouth.
"Do we have to?", she whined.
No. We can stay like this forever. "Yes, we do."
"OK. Talk.", she said and snuggled closer to me. Can she be any more adorable?
I took a deep breath to compose my nerves which started acting up.
I practiced this in my mind numerous times. I need to tell her what happened seven years ago and everything after that, without revealing how I'm aware of anything she told me during what she believes were her dreams.
"I already told you that I have a lot to share with you, and I will start from the beginning. I want you to understand what happened after high school.", I started cautiously, and I felt her tensing against me.
Keep on talking. Don't chicken out now!
"As we were approaching the end of high school, I made some decisions that impacted both of us."
"Why are you talking about high school?", she interrupted me.
"Because it's important. You promised that you will listen.", I reminded her, and she nodded in agreement.
"I will start by saying that I'm sorry. I was young and foolish, and I didn't realize how difficult it will be to stick to the plan. I focused on my studies, trying to finish as soon as possible so that I can be self-sufficient, to be someone you can rely on."
Serina pushed herself away from me and I felt the loss of her proximity.
"We didn't see each other after high school.", she said with a small frown on her enchanting face. "Are you saying that you avoided me so that I can rely on you?"
Well, this didn't turn out the way I expected. "Yes and no. It's not that simple."
"Make it simple.", she demanded.
"Do you remember Magdalena Thompson?"
Serina's eyes flashed in anger. "Is that what you want to talk about? Do you think I want to listen about your conquests?"
"No, no, no…", I said with urgency. "There was nothing between me and Magda. Nothing. Ever. I promise."
Serina's frown only deepened, and I saw that I'm running out of time.
"Please, listen without jumping to conclusions. We were in the last year of high school when Magda came to me and told me that she is aware of the trust your grandmother left you. Magda said that she can make it disappear, that she will use her father's connection and you will lose funds for college."
"Why would she do that?"
"Because she is crazy. She invited me a few times to go out with her, and I refused. She saw us together and because she couldn't get to me directly, I can only assume that she checked your background."
Serina nodded in understanding. "So, she used my fund to blackmail you into dating her."
"Not dating. I mean… that was her initial idea, but I told her that no matter what she tries I will never agree to something like that, so she compromised. She said that I need to stay away from you, and you will keep your funds."
I took Serina's hand into mine and held onto it like a lifeline.
"Serina, at that time, I didn't think it will be a big deal. I knew that with us going to different colleges, it would be difficult for us to see each other, so agreeing to her demands didn't sound like a big sacrifice. I believed that phone calls will be enough as I focused on studying and I finished school one year before my generation." I skipped the part where I was keeping an eye on her because I didn't want to sound like a stalker. "I used that year to build my investments with the goal to have enough so that when you finish your school we can travel, and I can take care of you. But then you disappeared and… some said that you were dead, and there were rumors how you found a man and stayed in Italy, but I didn't believe in any of those. I knew that you are alive, and I waited."
Serina's gaze hardened. "And how does Magda fit into that story?"
I let out a long exhale. "I attended a few events with her. She swore that it's nothing more than two friends going together, and I saw those events as an opportunity to strengthen my business network. Later, I found out that she staged photos and started rumors about how we are dating. Things got out of control, and I cut all my ties with her but that didn't stop her from telling people how we are meeting secretly, and she is pregnant with my child. She is a nutcase."
I thought that Serina will be pacified, but her frown only grew deeper. "What about other women?"
"Other women?", I was puzzled, unsure what she was talking about. "I went on a few dates, mostly because I succumbed to social pressure, but it never caught on. Serina, I was young and foolish."
"Why are you telling me this?"
"Because I need to clear the air between us. No more secrets. We were apart for too long because I was stupid. There was not a single day I didn't think about you, wondering where you are, if you are safe or happy. Not knowing, was torture and I don't want to go through that again. Starting today, I will tell you everything you want to know. I regret not telling you about Magda when she approached me. Because of that, I lost my chance to love Sanya. You returned as Seraphina, and I will not repeat the same mistake."
Serina's eyes widened in shock. "Did you say… love?"
How stupid of me. What happened with waiting for better timing to make a confession? But the word was out already and denying it would be detrimental.
"Yes, I did. From the first day of high school, I fell for you completely. You are the only one for me, Serina."
"From the first day of high school?", Serina repeated, like she wanted to make sure she heard me right.
"Yes.", I confirmed.
Serina was in a daze, and I used this opportunity to hold her other hand as well.
"You loved me from the first day of school…", she said, her voice barely a whisper as her eyes stirred with something I couldn't read.
"Then… why did you leave?", she asked in a weak voice, and I could see all her insecurities resurfacing.
Well, that backfired.
"I told you, it was…"
"Yes, you told me. It was all because of Magda and you did it so that I can go to college. But what about me? Where does that put me?" Serina angrily yanked her hands out of mine.
Her glare prevented me from trying to hold her again and her next questions caught me unprepared.
"How can you guarantee that it will not happen again? Can you tell me with certainty that you will not abandon me again if you believe that it's for some greater good?"
And there was the heavy word, 'abandon'.
Did I abandon her? I guess I did.
I was stupid and that's in the past. How can I convince her that I would rather die than leave her side?
---
If you are not reading this at 'W e b n o v e l . c o m', then the content you're reading is stolen! Please support the author by reading this novel from the original source.
- - -
I enjoyed our current situation. Serina existed in my embrace and our hearts were beating as one.
However, I was painfully aware that there are few things we need to clear up before moving forward. If we don't, we will risk going back to where we were yesterday, and last year, and three years before, and I couldn't live another day without Serina in my life.
I needed to explain what happened so that she doesn't doubt me in the future.
"Serina…", I called, and she nodded lazily in response. Did she fall asleep? "Are you with me?"
"Absolutely."
I loved her answer, almost how much I love her. Is this a good time for a love confession? I should probably leave that for later.
"Serina, we need to talk." I forced the words out of my mouth.
"Do we have to?", she whined.
No. We can stay like this forever. "Yes, we do."
"OK. Talk.", she said and snuggled closer to me. Can she be any more adorable?
I took a deep breath to compose my nerves which started acting up.
I practiced this in my mind numerous times. I need to tell her what happened seven years ago and everything after that, without revealing how I'm aware of anything she told me during what she believes were her dreams.
"I already told you that I have a lot to share with you, and I will start from the beginning. I want you to understand what happened after high school.", I started cautiously, and I felt her tensing against me.
Keep on talking. Don't chicken out now!
"As we were approaching the end of high school, I made some decisions that impacted both of us."
"Why are you talking about high school?", she interrupted me.
"Because it's important. You promised that you will listen.", I reminded her, and she nodded in agreement.
"I will start by saying that I'm sorry. I was young and foolish, and I didn't realize how difficult it will be to stick to the plan. I focused on my studies, trying to finish as soon as possible so that I can be self-sufficient, to be someone you can rely on."
Serina pushed herself away from me and I felt the loss of her proximity.
"We didn't see each other after high school.", she said with a small frown on her enchanting face. "Are you saying that you avoided me so that I can rely on you?"
Well, this didn't turn out the way I expected. "Yes and no. It's not that simple."
"Make it simple.", she demanded.
"Do you remember Magdalena Thompson?"
Serina's eyes flashed in anger. "Is that what you want to talk about? Do you think I want to listen about your conquests?"
"No, no, no…", I said with urgency. "There was nothing between me and Magda. Nothing. Ever. I promise."
Serina's frown only deepened, and I saw that I'm running out of time.
"Please, listen without jumping to conclusions. We were in the last year of high school when Magda came to me and told me that she is aware of the trust your grandmother left you. Magda said that she can make it disappear, that she will use her father's connection and you will lose funds for college."
"Why would she do that?"
"Because she is crazy. She invited me a few times to go out with her, and I refused. She saw us together and because she couldn't get to me directly, I can only assume that she checked your background."
Serina nodded in understanding. "So, she used my fund to blackmail you into dating her."
"Not dating. I mean… that was her initial idea, but I told her that no matter what she tries I will never agree to something like that, so she compromised. She said that I need to stay away from you, and you will keep your funds."
I took Serina's hand into mine and held onto it like a lifeline.
"Serina, at that time, I didn't think it will be a big deal. I knew that with us going to different colleges, it would be difficult for us to see each other, so agreeing to her demands didn't sound like a big sacrifice. I believed that phone calls will be enough as I focused on studying and I finished school one year before my generation." I skipped the part where I was keeping an eye on her because I didn't want to sound like a stalker. "I used that year to build my investments with the goal to have enough so that when you finish your school we can travel, and I can take care of you. But then you disappeared and… some said that you were dead, and there were rumors how you found a man and stayed in Italy, but I didn't believe in any of those. I knew that you are alive, and I waited."
Serina's gaze hardened. "And how does Magda fit into that story?"
I let out a long exhale. "I attended a few events with her. She swore that it's nothing more than two friends going together, and I saw those events as an opportunity to strengthen my business network. Later, I found out that she staged photos and started rumors about how we are dating. Things got out of control, and I cut all my ties with her but that didn't stop her from telling people how we are meeting secretly, and she is pregnant with my child. She is a nutcase."
I thought that Serina will be pacified, but her frown only grew deeper. "What about other women?"
"Other women?", I was puzzled, unsure what she was talking about. "I went on a few dates, mostly because I succumbed to social pressure, but it never caught on. Serina, I was young and foolish."
"Why are you telling me this?"
"Because I need to clear the air between us. No more secrets. We were apart for too long because I was stupid. There was not a single day I didn't think about you, wondering where you are, if you are safe or happy. Not knowing, was torture and I don't want to go through that again. Starting today, I will tell you everything you want to know. I regret not telling you about Magda when she approached me. Because of that, I lost my chance to love Sanya. You returned as Seraphina, and I will not repeat the same mistake."
Serina's eyes widened in shock. "Did you say… love?"
How stupid of me. What happened with waiting for better timing to make a confession? But the word was out already and denying it would be detrimental.
"Yes, I did. From the first day of high school, I fell for you completely. You are the only one for me, Serina."
"From the first day of high school?", Serina repeated, like she wanted to make sure she heard me right.
"Yes.", I confirmed.
Serina was in a daze, and I used this opportunity to hold her other hand as well.
"You loved me from the first day of school…", she said, her voice barely a whisper as her eyes stirred with something I couldn't read.
"Then… why did you leave?", she asked in a weak voice, and I could see all her insecurities resurfacing.
Well, that backfired.
"I told you, it was…"
"Yes, you told me. It was all because of Magda and you did it so that I can go to college. But what about me? Where does that put me?" Serina angrily yanked her hands out of mine.
Her glare prevented me from trying to hold her again and her next questions caught me unprepared.
"How can you guarantee that it will not happen again? Can you tell me with certainty that you will not abandon me again if you believe that it's for some greater good?"
And there was the heavy word, 'abandon'.
Did I abandon her? I guess I did.
I was stupid and that's in the past. How can I convince her that I would rather die than leave her side?
---
If you are not reading this at 'W e b n o v e l . c o m', then the content you're reading is stolen! Please support the author by reading this novel from the original source.
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