Amara – Reunion

Author's note: this is from Seraphina's point of view

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During the next few days, I was focused on training my pheromone control.

The stupid gauge wouldn't budge from that number 5 and I was getting frustrated. Actually, it went up to 8 a few times, but that was negligible, and I was unable to make it happen again willingly.

At the same time, involuntarily, I was getting a better grasp at accessing my memories. It took much less time and focus to see the areas I wanted, and I did my best to stay away from anything that is beyond high school.

I know, I know… I am a coward for not looking into my college days without Duke, but I still remember the loneliness that ripped my soul apart when I saw myself playing piano, and I don't want to feel that again.

Right now, Duke is my beacon, he is the source of my drive to keep on going, and I draw strength from memories where he looks at me like I am the only person in the world.

I vividly remember the moment in Paris; Duke's embrace and the longing in his voice when he told me that he is missing me, and I might be losing my mind as that memory is filled with the scent of pine trees on a sunny day next to the sea, but I accept this insanity because nothing else makes sense.

I refuse to believe that things between me and Duke ended, and at the same time, I fear that I will fall apart if I find out that he moved on without me. Other than Aldus, Duke is all I have and as much as I am immortal, I will not survive the heartbreak. I need him, even if it's just my imagination.

Like every morning, over breakfast, Aldus asked me about the progress of my control over pheromones.

"Still nothing. I am so useless."

"I told you that it takes time.", Aldus reminded me. "Losing temper will only make the situation worse. You can't force it."

"What can I do?", I whined, like a spoiled child. "It's not working. Zero progress. Zero. Just thinking about it is making me helpless and angry."

"Your classes with tutors will resume in two days.", Aldus reminded me.

I was surprised by this change in topic. Didn't he ask me about my progress? Or maybe that was somehow related. "Will that help with my training?"

I thought that I should focus on practicing my pheromone control and doing other things will only reduce the amount of time I have for doing what's important. That is why I told Aldus not to call the tutors back yet, but it seems that he still went ahead with it.

"Sometimes a distraction will help you focus.", Aldus said.

"It doesn't sound logical."

"When you feel that you hit a dead-end, you should change your strategy.", Aldus explained. "Repeating a thing that doesn't produce results can only lead to more failures. Failures make you frustrated and you can't think straight which only leads to more failures. It's a vicious circle which you need to break. Since you are out of ideas, do something else, something that you really-really want to do. Something that will lift your spirits and calm you down and you can feed off that energy for your practice."

I was thinking about Aldus's words. Something I really-really want to do… to lift my spirits… my eyes lit up. "Alchemy."

Aldus paused. "What?"

"Alchemy.", I repeated. "I really want to learn it. Tutors are fine. I can do ballet and painting and etiquette lessons and learn French and whatever else is needed, but I really want to learn alchemy."

"Your knowledge is lacking, Serina. Your foundation is weak, and you won't be able to do anything other than get in the way."

I was not willing to give up. "How much knowledge you had when you started? I nearly memorized four books on rare herbs and one book on minerals and…"

"Fine.", Aldus cut me off. He pinched the roof of his nose and I waited for him to speak again.

I saw him succumbing to my demands and my cheeks hurt how much I was suppressing a victorious smile. If Aldus sees me gloating, he might change his mind.

"After breakfast, we will go to the lab. I will find you something to do…"

I did a victory dance in my mind. It's happening!

…

"Hi Krob!", I greeted him cheerfully, happy to see him and I was still high after the exhilarating portal-travel. That rune light show and a pull and instantly appearing in a different place… it will never get old.

Krob turned toward me, and I looked at the grayish dry-skin face and completely black eyes, and I thought how things change. Or maybe I changed. At the first sight of Krob, I was terrified. Then I realized that he will obey Aldus's commands, and shortly after that I confirmed that Krob is not a bad person (for a ghoul). Sure, he wanted to suck my soul out, but that is because he is a ghoul and ghouls feed on souls so he mistook me for a meal. I can't take that against him.

After I've met Krob, I read about ghouls and I found out that they are born from a soul of an innocent who is unwilling to leave his (or her) loved ones behind. Ghouls remain in this plane bound by their hunger for souls, with a curse that they can't remember their past. How ironic. An innocent became a predator who will kill indiscriminately, and he forgot about his loved ones he didn't want to abandon.

"Young Miss…", Krob greeted me in his raspy voice, and his head bobbed a bit. Krob was excited to see me. We didn't meet from the incident at the fair which seems like it happened ages ago.

"Please, call me Serina.", I demanded. I didn't want him to treat me like other people who are working for Aldus. Krob was a ghoul, an immortal creature, and he knew that I was different, so I hoped that we can be friends.

"That will not be appropriate, young Miss…", Krob rejected.

I didn't want to push it. There will be enough time to remedy this later. After all, we have an eternity.

"How are you doing?", I asked.

Krob paused, obviously not used to exchanging pleasantries. "As usually. How about you, young Miss?"

"A lot of things happened. I'm taking all kinds of classes and I went to Paris!" I saw that his black eyes were looking at me curiously, so I asked, "Would you like me to tell you about it?"

Krob nodded and I heard Aldus say irritably, "Did you come here to learn something, or to chit-chat?"

I swallowed softly and looked at Krob guiltily. "I'm here on business, but when I get a chance, I will tell you about it."

I pretended not to see Krob's disappointment as I spoke to Aldus eagerly. "Where do I start?"

Aldus gestured toward the door on the right. It's one of the areas I didn't explore the last time I came here.

I followed after Aldus and my steps halted as I got inside. It was a large laboratory.

The previous room looks like a neat reception area compared to this.

All sorts of containers and mysterious things were placed everywhere, on the tables, shelves, and some on the floor, leaving narrow maze-like passages for one to move about.

It looked messy and random but when I observed carefully, I saw that items were grouped in ways I couldn't understand, and most of the things were labeled with symbols I didn't recognize.

As I moved through space, I realized that this lab was a mix of ancient and modern, just like Aldus's lab in Venice.

One area was covered in tall refrigerators which had glass doors and I could see various containers neatly arranged inside.

Wherever I went, Krob followed me silently, like a puppy. On a few occasions, I thought that he reached to touch my hair but when I turned to see him, he looked at me blankly like nothing out of the ordinary happened, and I wondered if I imagined it.

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