As The Wind Blows Your Scent To Me

As she was standing in front of the kitchen table, Himari silently berated herself for showing such behavior in front of Kazuya. He must be perplexed by her sudden action.

Yet, it was unbearable for Himari to quickly adjust her emotions in a span of a short time. 

She felt so stuffy and painful inside. It was as if sharp spears kept digging into her heart, reminding her of the pain she had to endure before.

She really wanted to find a place to hide, where no one could see her.

But, she had to keep on smiling and laughing as if there was nothing wrong. 

After all, it was something that she hid deep inside her heart.

"Himari?"

Himari's shoulders jolted. Those dark thoughts shattered away. She abruptly looked up to where the voice came.

He was standing so close to her. 

She could see her face reflected on his dark eyes. 

Without she wanted to, a drop of tear finally trickled down her cheek. 

Kazuya was alarmed once he saw her face right now. Himari looked as if she was so close to bursting into tears.

Her eyes that would usually curve as she smiled and laughed were reddened by gleaming tears. Her face looked terribly pale as if there was no blood running inside her.

"...Kazuya."

Even the sound of her voice became hoarse like there was something clogging in her throat, making her unable to speak properly.

Kazuya frowned.

He didn't say much. He just did what his heart told him to.

Kazuya pulled Himari close to him. He carefully wrapped one arm around her petite frame while the other was gently pressing her head against his chest.

"Cry if you want."

She didn't have to tell him if she didn't want to.

He just didn't want her to cry alone.

Himari was startled by his actions. They were so close until she could faintly hear the sound of his heart beating in his chest. 

Its rhythm was so steady, so full of life. 

Himari wanted to back away but, the moment she heard his voice tinged in tenderness echoed from above her head, the tears that she tried hard to hold back finally ran out of her eyes.

His touch brought warmth to her, tenderly easing her stuffy heart.

The little apartment was filled by the sound of her cries.

Kazuya kept on holding to her. He embraced her as if he was cradling something delicate and precious.

Each time he heard Himari's cries, Kazuya swore it was like his own heart was crying sorrowfully with her. Yet, he just let her cried her heart out while he was there to comfort her.

The distance between them was almost none.

He kept embracing her with one arm while the other was still tenderly stroking the back of her head while her hands were clutching on the front part of his shirt as she cried.

Both of them didn't know how much time had passed when Himari's cries gradually subsided sometime later.

"...sorry, I'm sorry."

Himari was ashamed to see a part of the man's shirt was soaked by her tears. She awkwardly let go of his shirt. The parts where she held earlier were wrinkled.

"Feel better now?"

Kazuya looked down at her face. He retracted the hand that was stroking the back of his head to her tender face. The tip of his thumb ran gently under one of her eyes, trying to dry the remains of her tears away.

"En..." Himari nodded weakly.

It was thoroughly embarrassing to have him seeing her cry but, Himari couldn't deny that she felt a lot better than before. 

Kazuya breathed out in relief, "Sit first. Don't keep on standing."

Before Himari could react, Kazuya led her to the dining chair and gently pushed her to sit. He walked to the sink, grabbed a clean towel from the cabinet and let the water run over it. Kazuya squeezed the water out then he returned to where Himari sat.

"Your eyes would swell if you just let them be."

Kazuya sat next to Himari. He cupped one side of her face before he dabbed the damp towel over her closed eyes and her cheeks. He ended it by squeezing her red nose, much to Himari's surprise.

"Hehe, why do you look like a child right now?" He deliberately joking with her, trying to ease her tensed nerves.

Himari shot him a glare yet it appeared pitiful as her eyes were still reddened by her tears. She took the towel from him and rubbed her nose. She secretly hoped she didn't have snot running out of her nose while she cried earlier.

Kazuya helplessly looked at her. He got up from the chair, took a clean glass from the cabinet and poured water into it. 

"Drink it."

Himari put down the towel. She took the glass and quietly drank the water. Her throat was indeed parched after crying.

"Do you really feel better now?" 

Himari lifted up her eyes from the glass, staring back at the man whose gaze was deep and unfathomable to her. 

"A bit..." She admitted.

Kazuya smiled faintly. He thought for a few moments then decided to just ask, "Do you want to tell me why did you cry?"

He saw his young lady froze due to his question. 

"It's okay if you don't want to..."

"Chiharu asked me something before."

Himari cut him off before Kazuya could finish his words. She held her gaze onto his, refusing to look away this time.

It was inevitable for him to not worry but, even so, Kazuya still didn't force her if she didn't want to tell him.

"What? Chiharu?" 

Kazuya was baffled.

Why did Himari cry because of his niece? What happened when the two of them were together? As far as he knew, both of them were so good to each other.

The questions in Kazuya's eyes were expected by Himari. He must be wondering why did she bring up Chiharu's name right now.

Although the reason she cried wasn't solely due to Chiharu, Himari still didn't have the courage to tell him the other reason.

"What happened?" Kazuya softened his voice.

Himari pursed her lips, trying to find better words to tell him. 

One by one, she recounted the events.

Although there were no obvious changes on Kazuya's face as he listened to Himari, she understood he was actually troubled inside. What she told him was something hard to listen to.

"...I didn't know how to answer her. How could... how could she smile as if it's nothing when she's talking about her mother? I didn't know if it's because she's still so small or..."

Himari choked on her sobs. Once again, her eyes were blurred by a layer of tears.

Kazuya suppressed himself from sighing heavily. He leaned forward and pulled her head to his chest. Like before, he gently patted the back of her head.

"When... she has just lost her mother and my brother fell into a coma shortly after, Chiharu only knew to cry, looking for them."

The miserable memories of the past slowly resurfaced in Kazuya's mind. Although they happened more than one thousand days before, every time he was reminded of them, his heart would break all over again for his niece.

"Mommy.... Mommy... want Mommy!"

"Waaa! Daddy... Daddy where?"

"Mommy Daddy, where? Where?"

Chiharu was just a little over two years old at that time, just barely be able to talk. She was still so young to understand that her mother won't ever return and her father was met with a terrible doom.

It was hard for her to sleep at night. Chiharu would often wake up with nightmares, prompting Kazuya to always be with her until she fell asleep after crying tirelessly.

Kazuya couldn't deny that it was so exhausting because, during that period, countless burdens fell on him at the same time.

He had to defend his brother's company from the snakes lurking in the dark. He also had to make sure the siblings were well taken care of because no one, there was no one in both his family and his sister-in-law's family that could be depended on other than him. 

And, he also experienced the pain of having someone leaving him because of the uncertainties of their future.

But, Kazuya pushed himself forward just to not disappoint his brother and the two siblings. He also didn't want to give up on himself.

"Himari, I'm sorry. Chiharu made you worried for her..."

In the end, those were the only things Kazuya could say to Himari. 

He didn't know why did Chiharu suddenly bring up about her mother but, he felt uncomfortable to see Himari was affected by the little girl's words.

"En, no, you don't have to apologize," Himari sniffled, trying hard to hold back from crying again. She tilted up her chin, looking at the man who was still patting her head. She said in a low voice, "I'm actually glad Chiharu asked me that. I feel like... she has grown to trust me more."

If not, Himari didn't believe that Chiharu would openly throw such questions to her.

The lights in Kazuya's eyes mellowed as his lips curled up. 

He really loved to see her being optimistic but, he also hoped she won't pressure herself to say that everything was okay.

"You can rely on me," Kazuya spoke quietly. Their eyes were still locked together. He breathed out, "No matter what, you too can rely on me."

Himari blinked. Her heart skipped a beat as she realized how close they currently were.

Kazuya held back his laughter at the sight of her blushing face. He lowered his face then, like the time many nights before, he dropped a tender kiss on her forehead. 

Himari closed her eyes. She quietly savored the warmth feeling on her forehead before the sensation gently seeping into her heart.