As The Wind Blows Your Scent To Me

Two days later, Himari and Kazuya went to a restaurant. The children were left under the care of Aunt Mayu. After Kazuya clocked off, he went to pick up Himari and brought her to the restaurant where she met Jun a few months ago.

Today was the day Himari planned to give closure to Jun.

They arrived earlier than the appointed time. Before both of them got out of the car, Kazuya carefully cupped Himari's face and gave her a peck on her lips. 

"Cheer up, sweetheart. You won't be seeing him anymore after this."

Kazuya didn't know which appropriate words should he use in the face of Himari's complicated look. His wife had been nervous since last night. She didn't even have a good sleep. 

"Today would be the last time," replied Himari faintly.

She really didn't want to see Jun ever again. Doing so would just tear up another wound in her heart.

Like before, Kazuya gave space to Himari for meeting Jun alone.

While she was led by a waitress to a private dining room, he waited for her at one of the tables. He just ordered a cup of coffee, eyes continuously drifting to the said room.

"Please enter, missus," The young waitress respectfully gestured at Himari to enter the room, "Mr. Fuhijara is waiting for you."

Himari was a bit surprised to hear that Jun was already here. Her heart was drumming loudly against her chest, almost getting to her throat.

No, keep calm, Himari.

You have to do this.

You have to.

Himari took a couple of deep breaths before she lifted up her right feet, walking inside the room. The waitress gently closed the door behind her after saying she would return soon.

Who was awaiting Himari was an ashen-looking young man, his appearance was unkempt.

Stunned by how Jun looked right now, a sense of guilt crept into her heart. 

Himari still remembered how bad Jun looked on the day he found her at the mall. It seemed like her silence had worsened his state.

"...Himari, you're here."

Jun slowly got up from his seat, his pupils trembled at the sight of her. His voice was so hoarse, choked up under the overwhelming emotions that swirled within him.

"Yes, I'm here," answered Himari stiffly, "I'm sorry for making you wait for me."

"It's okay... Please, sit down," Jun rigidly nodded his head.

Both of them understood the meaning behind Himari's words. Instead of implying the time she arrived here, Himari was actually talking about how she had made him wait for her explanation.

The waitress entered the room while pushing a food trolley. She carefully served a three-tiered dessert stand on the table, followed by a freshly brewed pot of tea. 

Although Himari came here with no intention to eat, she still booked for some food. 

Neither of them touched the desserts nor the tea even after the waitress left. 

The air inside the room was too stifling, almost crushing into their hearts. No words were exchanged between them. Time continued spinning yet no one broke the silence.

Until Jun had had enough.

"...why you didn't tell me?"

Why did she keep quiet about it?

The same questions almost drove him crazy, days and nights, yet Jun knew there was only an answer; it was because he was too incompetent and didn't deserve her trust.

Himari's lips trembled. A faint smile curled up on her lips. A layer of moisture wetted her eyes the moment she looked at the man sitting opposite her.

Her love for him disappeared as the seasons changed.

Yet, Himari was also regretful to see the man who once brightened her youth was reduced to such a state.

"I just wanted to keep moving forward... and I hate your mother, even until now... that was why I didn't tell you."

Himari was no saint.

After being thrown into a hellish situation by the woman who gave birth to the man she used to love, hatred and resentment overcame the good feelings she once had toward him. 

She could never forgive nor forget.

Jun lowered his eyes. After hearing the confession, he didn't dare to look at Himari any longer.

The moment he knew the truth, Jun felt as if his world fell apart. Never did he expect that his own mother would act so vicious to Himari three years ago. She went as far as hiring scums to violate Himari. 

His mother was a woman yet, she cruelly let another woman experience hell on earth.

Jun was so ashamed, angry and confused at the same time. Since the night he uncovered the truth, he bore resentment to his birth mother.

Clenching his shaking hands, Jun squeezed out his next words. 

His throat felt like it was on fire. 

"Himari... I won't ask you to forgive me or my mother... and... I promise that you won't see or hear anything about us again. I would no longer appear in front of you."

Jun was too exhausted. 

His dreams to be together with her again were shattered, falling into pieces. The sharp edges stabbed into his heart, bleeding his heart dried.

Jun slowly elevated his gaze. His eyes reddened with unshed tears.

Staring right into Himari's eyes, he whispered.

"I would leave here soon."

Himari blinked.

What did he mean by that?

Jun let out a suppressed sigh. He repeatedly clenched and unclenched his hands before he tightly grabbed his trousers, desperately wanting to hold onto something. 

Under Himari's confused gaze, he continued.

"I have long realized that... I am so weak. I couldn't protect you from my own mother nor could I stand against my family. All this time, I just deluded myself that I've changed for the better."

Jun was thoroughly exhausted to be chained down by his family's shackles. He was just a tool used by his parents to keep their family's prestige. 

"I will leave the country soon. I'm not sure whether I would come back or not but... I wanna say that I am grateful that you're willing to see me one last time."

Unlike how Jun stubbornly reacted by saying he would get Himari back before, he lowered his ego and chose to end this hopeless dreams.

"...it's nothing."

Because Himari was still shocked to hear that Jun would really leave, she perfunctorily replied to him.

Jun laughed yet it sounded so hollow. 

"You've married him, right? I saw Nanako mentioning it to our classmates before."

Their classmates saw the congratulatory post uploaded by Nanako on her account.

It was a photo of Himari and Kazuya during the celebratory dinner more than a week ago. Nanako wished a happy and lifelong marriage to the newlyweds. The post attracted the attention of the gossipmongers.

"Yes, I've married him," answered Himari, her gaze softening at the mention of Kazuya.

Jun's heart throbbed seeing the tender look in her eyes. He knew it was directed to the man that was now occupying her heart.

Jun still remembered the photo clearly.

Himari was standing next to the man. She looked so pure and angelic in her white dress, holding to the bouquet of flowers. Instead of looking at the camera, both of them were staring into each other's eyes. 

Jun sneered inwardly, mocking himself.

He would never have a chance to stand by her side anymore.

Jun resisted the weakness he felt in his legs. He pushed the chair backward as he slowly stood up. 

He didn't want to stay here any longer. With every second passing, it would just weaken his resolve to leave. 

"Himari, thank you for the memories you've given me."

Jun bowed deeply to the young lady, conveying his gratitude and regret to her.

A vow was cemented into his heart.

If one day he found someone else to be loved, he won't let her suffer the same fate as Himari. Before he had the unshakeable power to go against his own family, he didn't dare to let his heart be taken.

But...

Jun was also afraid that he would just repeat the same mistake.

"I wish you well, Jun."

That was all Himari could say.

She wished him to be able to walk in the path he desired instead of being controlled by another person. He wasn't a puppet. 

Jun straightened his back. He threw a smile at Himari.

Before he walked out of the room, Jun stopped then glanced behind his shoulders. His lips parted then closed before he opened them again. 

Himari saw the hesitation in his eyes. It seemed like he was struggling with something.

"Jun, do you have something else to say?"

Because this would be their last meeting, Himari didn't want him to feel any regrets.

It was the last thing she could do to him.

Jun pursed his lips. His jaw was stiff.

In the end, he forced out the words that clogged in his throat.

"May I know... what did you feel about... the news of the child? ...when you first knew about it?"

Himari was stunned. She unconsciously placed a hand on her lower abdomen.

Ashamed, Jun shook his head.

"Nevermind... You don't have to answer me. I'm sorry..."

He shouldn't ask a question that might become a thorn to her.

Jun twisted the doorknob. A slight gap was revealed, showing him a pair of eyes staring intently at him from a nearby table.

It was him.

Himari's husband.

Jun suppressed the heaviness of his heart. He took a step forward, wanting to leave.

"I was happy."

Froze, Jun's eyes widened.

Behind him, Himari was already crying silently. One of her hands remained on her tummy. 

Her voice was earnest, "I was nervous at first but... I was happy."

She was delighted with the news of the child growing inside her even though he had left at that time. 

Hearing the affirmations, Jun smiled with his back still facing Himari. 

"...I see."

Without looking back, Jun walked forward. As he passed by the table where Kazuya sat, he gave the man a faint smile.

This was enough.

At least, he got to know from her own mouth that she didn't regret carrying the child.

Even though it was short-lived. 

Goodbye, the flower of my youth.