As The Wind Blows Your Scent To Me

The next day quickly came.

Himari was sweeping the fallen leaves in the yard with the morning sun hanging on the sky. She had just had breakfast with her mother. While she was tidying up the yard of their home, her mother was busy rearranging the items in the fridge.

Both of them went out early to go to the morning market. Since Himari was still at home, both mother and daughter took the opportunity to go to the market together. They bought fresh vegetables and poultry as well as seafood from the hawkers.

"Meow~"

Chobi jumped from the garden table. He perfectly landed on the ground beside Himari.

"You're not going out today, Chobi? Hey! Don't play like that!"

Himari cast a look at her cat who was busy chasing after the broom. His action made the leaves she had just gathered on a spot scattered away from the ground.

"Meow, meow~"

Annoyed, Himari bent down, picked the fat cat up and put him on the wooden porch. With a hand on her hip, she gave her stupid cat a warning.

"Stay there. If you messed with the leaves again, see how I deal with you."

"Meow~"

Chobi ignored his mama's angry face. He lifted up his butt, flicked his tail and ran inside the house.

Himari rolled her eyes.

After she finished sweeping around the yard, Himari did some stretches to ease her aching back.

Whew~ Even the simple act of cleaning the yard made her felt tired. 

Was it because she had gotten older?

Himari went to wash her hands. The cool water felt so refreshing to her. She grabbed her phone that was lying on the wooden porch then shouted toward the inside of her home.

"Mom! I'm going to the stream!"

Akemi yelled back, "Okay! Don't forget to return before noon!"

"Alright!"

Himari left the house alone with only bringing her phone. She slowly made her way to a stream that was located not far from her home.

Like yesterday, the weather was fine. The white clouds gently drifted on the sky. The faint fragrance of flowers and soil floated in the air as the wind blew.

Himari cast a look around her. She saw a group of children playing catch games and another one playing baseball on a field nearby.

Unlike them who was overflowing with joy, her mood was quite complicated now.

Himari didn't tell her mother about the parcel she got from Jun yesterday. She wondered, did the parcel get return back to him or not?

The only one who knew about it was Nanako. Himari only told her friend because she didn't know what else she should do in this matter.

Once she reached the stream, Himari found no one was there. It was really peaceful here. She hoped its tranquility could lift up her mood even for a bit.

After taking a seat on a huge rock under a tree, Himari made a call to Nanako.

Her friend wanted to call her as soon as she was informed about the matter but, Himari said she needed some time to think.

Only now did Himari call Nanako.

"Himari! Are you alright?" Nanako's frantic voice penetrated her eardrums as soon as the call was connected.

"Where are you now? Shouting like that?" Himari answered her friend with a laugh.

"Hurm... I'm currently in the clubhouse with Ryota. He invited me for a swim."

"Ah, then let me call you next time."

Turned out, it was a bad time to call Nanako. Ryota must be free today for him to ask Nanako out for a date. Usually, he would still be busy even during holidays.

"No, no! Just talk to me now. Don't worry. That stinky man of mine met his old friends so they are chatting together currently," Nanako quickly rejected her friend's suggestion. 

"Really?"

"Really!"

"Hurm, okay..."

Himari bent down. She propped the hand that was holding the phone over her knees while the other reached out for the fallen leaves on the ground.

"Nanako, I don't know what to do."

Himari began by voicing out her insecurities. That was what she truly felt right now.

"Because Jun didn't listen to you and kept pestering you?" guessed Nanako, "Thus, disregarding your feelings?"

"En," Himari pursed her lips. Her sigh was audible in the quiet place.

The only sounds that were accompanying her was the blowing wind passing the trees, leaving the leaves and twigs rattled against each other in its wake.

"I've made myself clear so many times. Even my mother talked to him when he came here the other day but, he won't listen."

Himari was truly frustrated by what Jun was doing. 

When she had let go of her heartbreaking first love, eager to move forward with her life, he returned and created troubles for her.

Jun was adamant to get her back to him, even though Himari had rejected his wishes.

"Himari, he doesn't listen because he believes as long as he shows you his efforts, you would return to him," Nanako pointed out the obvious point, "In this case, no matter what you say to him, he would just think it's because you're still mad at him."

"Yes, I'm mad at him! I don't want my life to suddenly be thrown into chaos because of his inability to listen to me!"

Exasperated by the situation that fell on her, Himari raised her voice. She almost wanted to scratch her head in frustration.

"Then, if he continues this kind of act, won't your heart feels touched and in the end, agree to reconcile with him?"

Although her friend had firmly said that she won't be together with Jun again, Nanako still thought there was a possibility of it happening.

This was a matter of the heart. Once a crack was formed, the sealed feelings that Himari used to have on Jun might seep out through it and lead her back to him.

"I... I don't want it to happen," Himari smiled bitterly, "I don't... We are not for each other... Really..."

Like how Nanako guessed, Himari's firm stance when she said she would not go to Jun again was slightly shaking.

She did not want them to be together again.

But, would her heart really follow what her mind wanted?

The two friends drowned in silence for a moment, letting different thoughts loomed in their minds.

"Himari, do you remember what I asked you three years ago? When you just have broken up with him?"

Nanako softened her voice as she slowly tried to make her friend remembered.

"...What did you ask?" Himari questioned her back in puzzlement.

Nanako laughed faintly, "At that time, I asked what would you do if you were to meet a situation when your love journey is difficult again due to obstacles. At that time, you said you want to see how much you've grown up as a person before deciding to stay with him or not."

Under Nanako's stimulation, the faded memory slowly regained its clarity in Himari's mind.

"...Yes, you did ask me that."

"Then, the situation happens again now. You have broken up with Jun but, now your love life meets obstacles again. Under what aspect do you reject him? It is solely because of his family or your heart no longer has him even for a bit?"

Nanako's questions sent Himari into confusion. She suddenly didn't understand why did her friend ask her that.

Could it be applied to her situation now?

"Nanako, I don't understand," Himari felt like she wanted to cry.

"Hahaha! Sorry, sorry, I guess it's hard for you to answer," Nanako laughed despite her friend was in such a situation, "How about we do this? Let's meet up once you return. We can go to the salon together. It's hard to discuss this on the phone."

"Okay... I think so too," answered Himari weakly.

"For now, don't think about it. It would just stress you out! Have fun with the rest of your holidays. You can come crying at me later."

"Alright, ah. Be prepared to treat me to a meal."

"Hehe, sure~"

In the end, Himari didn't get any way to end this miserable situation.

Even after ending the call, Himari continued sitting under the tree. Her mind was slowly thinking back of her conversation with Nanako.

For now, her heart was unwilling to face any hardships with Jun.

The experiences during the time they were together were already enough.

Either it was because of his family or the love she had for him had completely disappeared, Himari didn't know what was the right answer.

Or, was it because she had never truly loved Jun in the five years they were together? 

That was why she didn't feel anything anymore for him? Even the idea to reignite the sparks between them seemed unappealing to Himari.

Yet, it sounded ironic because she herself was afraid of what he currently did would make her remember the lovely times they shared together.

Himari shook her head in helplessness.

The matter of the heart was complicated and confusing. It was hard to point out what actually that she wanted.

To love him again or not?

Or, to find another love for her life?

Himari's eyes flickered.

If that man was not Jun, instead, he was another man who she met after gaining her courage to love again, would she be willing to stand the tests around them? 

But...

Could she really love another man?

And, would that man accept her wholeheartedly if he knew what she had hidden?