Back to girlhood years

"When we say that I feel depressed, my parents will say that you have nothing to be depressed about. You don't have to work, and you don't have to worry about anything. It's just going to school, or you should be content under such good conditions in the United States; And what we hope is that parents ask you what's going on? Need their help or not.

When we say, I am so tired, my parents will say, don't you sit and study all day long? You don't have to do anything else. What's so tiring? What we expect is to have a rest when you are too tired, or come home, I will make you delicious food, and you can tell me what happened to you abroad.

When we say we want to see a psychologist, our parents will say, don't tell others, they will look down on you and think you are mentally ill; And what we expect is, they say, if you think that's helpful, go ahead.

As time goes by, we don't want to communicate with our parents any more, and we hold our breath when we encounter things again, because we think that our parents don't understand and it's useless to say more. "

Ye Fei said here, there are many people desperately nodded, yes, that's it.

"There is a generation gap between us and our parents. Whether at home or abroad, this generation gap has always existed. However, because we are far away from our parents, they can not understand and participate in our life. This generation gap has gradually become a gap. We don't want to say that they can't understand the vicious circle. There are more and more conflicts between parents. This is the main reason for Chinese students' depression.

Like you, I also have a mother who is in menopause. When she was in China, she was talking in my ears all day. Now when she is out of China, she wants to make a phone call one day. She still talks about it over and over again. Eat well and study hard. My mother is not an intellectual woman. She can't even read 26 letters. It's conceivable that she can't understand what I've experienced here even if I tell her. But it doesn't prevent me from talking to her. When I say some nouns, she may not understand, and then she will ask over there, and I will explain to her patiently. The first time, she may not understand, and the tenth time, she will understand. She will gradually understand what I'm doing here, and what I'm unhappy about and happy about now. "

"That said, but in my parents' eyes, there is only study and achievement. They don't care about me at all."

Ye Fei looked at the boy with glasses who asked the question, "if he doesn't love you, he won't eat pickled vegetables and steamed bread at home, save all the money he earned and send it to you, just to make you eat and drink well. People always magnify their own pain, but ignore the pain of others. You feel that parents don't understand, academic pressure, loneliness, these are very painful, but your parents, working 20 hours a day, give up dignity and health for your tuition, which is also very painful.

Do not subjectively think that your parents are difficult to communicate, they only value what, in fact, it is not the case, the road of life is your own, you returned from abroad, looking for a job that everyone envies, your parents are happy, at this time you may say that they love face, love to show off, but you can not forget that the biggest beneficiary of these things is you.

You are the one with the future, the one with dignity, the one with money or you. Your parents just gained a share of your so-called face. Communication needs patience and tolerance. Don't make it difficult for yourself or speculate maliciously about others. "

A few people applauded, ye Fei gave them a smile, closed the information in his hand, "let's stop here today. I have something else to do in the afternoon. If we have a chance, we can discuss the topic of loneliness again."

Zhang Chenxi praised Ye Fei for his good speech. Ye Fei said modestly, "no, I just feel it. Thank you for the material."

"No," Zhang Chenxi was a little embarrassed. "As you said, I cried when I called my mother last time. I cried and said how hard it was for me to be here. My mother was scared and kept comforting me. I said that if I felt really hard, I would come back. My parents supported you all my life. At that time, I really realized that they really love me."

"It's not my credit. You've figured it out."

"Come on, don't be modest. You are really good. I don't know why. You always give people a kind of inexplicable comfort. By the way, I heard that you are going to continue your PhD here? "

"I have this plan. Well, if there's no accident, I may still be here for a few years."

"That's great. I'm going to be a graduate student here. We're just going to be partners." Zhang Chenxi was very happy, smiling, and suddenly thought of something. "I'm going to go back to China in two days. What can I do for you? Or do you want to go back with me? You didn't go back for the Chinese new year

"I may have to wait a little longer. I'll get married next month, and then I'll go back."

Ye Fei did plan to do so, but there was an accident. A few days later, Yu Huilan called Ye Fei and hesitated for a long time. She had to let Ye Fei go back.

Ye Fei didn't understand, "are you sick?"

"No, Uncle Wu joined the one month club after listening to your suggestion. I've been busy all day, but my health is better than before.".

"In that case, I'll go back when Yiyi gets married next month."

"No, you have to come back."

Yefina was bored. Her mother seldom was so headstrong and asked, "Mom, can you tell me something directly? Today, I just talked with my friends about the necessity of communication. It's easy for us to have conflicts when you are like this. "

Yu Huilan said angrily: "what a mess, I will let you come back and I will let you come back."

Ye Fei is speechless. What's the matter? How to refuse to say, finally the phone was answered in the past, the voice of no right came from inside

"Feifei, your mother and I are going to get a license."

Ye Fei reacts for a while before she understands what it means to get a certificate. She calms down and says calmly, "Uncle Wu, can you give my mother the phone?"

Yu Huilan thought it was inconvenient for him to say something. She took the phone and rushed into the bedroom. "Come on, I'm alone in the room now."

"Have you thought about it, Ma?"

"Feifei, don't you want to? If you don't want to, I'll turn you down now. Uncle Wu is old enough to get a marriage certificate. "

Ye Fei didn't answer immediately. To tell you the truth, her heart is still a little repellent. Even though Wu Quan is a good person, he is an outsider after all. Such an outsider takes away her closest mother, which is not a taste in her heart.

"Uncle Wu is very kind to you, isn't he?"

"Good," Yu Huilan's voice was full of happiness. "I have known him for a long time, and I always know that he is a good man. After close contact, I found his advantages. Feifei, you know your father's temper, and your grandmother. I don't get the slightest respect in the original family. I often swallow my anger. But Uncle Wu is different. He respects me and cares about me very much. I feel very down-to-earth. "

Ye Fei laughed at the end of the phone. "In this case, I'll get a certificate so that people won't gossip. I'll get ready and go back in a few days."

"Feifei ~" Yu Huilan choked.

"Mom, I will grow up and have my own life in the future. I can't accompany you at any time. Now I'm glad to have such a person with you. Don't worry, I agree with this marriage."

With these words, a sad climb on my heart, ye Changhe, you finally have nothing to do with this family.