“Hannah, prepare my meal.”
Hannah widened her eyes.
“Y-Your meal?”
Considering the fact that my maids had been forcing me to eat the past few days, her shock was understandable. She nodded once and ran away before I could nag at her some more. She must have gone to pick up my food.
Now left alone, I stood up.
“Did I sleep too much?’
My fatigue could be explained by the excessive amount of sleep I had but my body also felt heavy as if I had just been drenched in water. Well, I had to admit my sleep had been terrible. Exhaustion had been guaranteed.
“That’s unavoidable.”
I might have overestimated myself. I believed–I thought I could get through anything. It wasn’t a belief that I had based on my hopes. Rather, it felt more like I had blindly believed that what I had been standing atop was solid ground.
But what I was actually standing on was the ground of a house standing precariously with no basement. When I first met the despair that was Castor, the ground had given way.
“The ability to regress and go through time loops. That’s a [curse] only the Heirs to the Lord of the Gods have.”
Upon Castor’s arrival, the ground beneath me collapsed helplessly and I was once again thrown into the abyss below without warning. My life had turned upside down like this once before–back when I had failed both my CSATs and my retake. Like those days of my past life, long, endless despair continued to draw me in.
“I’m the only one who knows how to break the curse.”
‘Be with me,’ despair whispered.
“But, Ashley, if I tell you, you’d leave me. Won’t you?”
Once I overcame a hurdle, another came searching for me. I closed my eyes. This had always been the case.
If even death could not end this chain of misfortunes, what should I do? Without being able to find an answer, I wandered aimlessly around my dream. I had slept like a log. A friend from my past life had theorised that trying to keep sleeping without end was a way for the body to protest against the world for the stress it was putting it through.
“Sleep…”
A long time ago, it had been easy to open my eyes in the morning. Especially when I was stressed, this habit of mine shone through. Early in the morning, at 8 am, whether it be for an exam or a morning meeting, I had never been late. But the fact remained that for the past few days I had slept as if I was dead. Perhaps it was because there were so many things I hadn’t wanted to face yet.
However, I couldn’t move forward while avoiding my misfortunes forever.
“In this entire world, this is something only you and I have”
Castor wanted me. Because he had the same curse as me? Because he needed me? I didn’t know why. However, for whatever goal he had, he had killed me more than 40 times without any hesitation. No, he destroyed me.
“That’s not love.”
I recalled what I had fearlessly said to the mad Crown Prince back when I had lost my memories. The love he believed to be love could never be love.
“The Lord of the Gods never loved the First Emperor. It was an obsession, not love.”
I wondered what he felt towards me? But it didn’t matter to me what he thought of me. But now I know for sure. In order for me to be truly free of him, only one of us could win. A victory that left no doubt as to who was the victor must be achieved.
No, I must be the one who wins.
“And in order to do that…”
I knew my strengths. And I knew what I had at my disposal. I glanced at the diary. The most evil being I had in my possession was also a companion that I shared my life with for the past few years. Like it or not, the diary had been stuck to my side for the past four years. After staring at the diary for a long time, I organised the information I had as I tapped on the back of the book before sweeping it down.
This was a world inside a novel. I had yet to confirm the existence of the female lead but what I knew of the novel so far was matching my reality. Even if I end up being some insane woman who persistently believed she was a character in a novel, most of the things I knew from the content of the original novel stayed true.
Until this point, I had been in a hurry to survive but now, I was going to be different.
Just like how Rebecca had changed her fate. If I had managed to change the ending of a villainess by making sure she didn’t fall for the tyrant, I could change the end of another character. And not only the end of a character but the end of this Empire. Just when Hannah re-entered the room, I had made up my mind.
“Princess, I have brought your meal.”
“Bring it here.”
After having gobbled up my food, I instructed Hannah to relay what I was about to say to Dane who had still been waiting for me.
“To wait for you?”
“Yes.”
Hannah asked where her princess was going. She seemed to be worrying about me since I just woke up. I reassured Hannah with a smile.
“I have a place to be. Prepare a carriage by the back entrance.”
Then, I sent Hannah away.
After changing my clothes and calling for Lena and Haina, the three of us headed to the back entrance. The place I was hurriedly heading to, after getting on the carriage waiting for me at the back entrance, was the 4th Administrative Office.
“No, not the back entrance. Head to the main gates.”
Instead of entering through the back entrance as I usually did, I glanced at the main gates and the driver whipped the horses accordingly without a word. He was a heavy-lipped man Dane sent me. Dane. The moment his name landed on my tongue, I quickly calmed down. For a moment, it had seemed as if the flame within me went out. I even thought I had been a little energised just a moment ago.
The officials at the administration seemed surprised at my sudden appearance. As I entered elegantly with my flowing dress, I glanced at each and every one of them. I strolled through the shock and astonishment like I had been walking on a path of flowers.
“Granius.”
When I finally arrived at his office, I also met the surprised Penne and Soricks. Ah, Soricks was here too. That was good. I turned away to face Granius.
“Please assemble all the templars in the patrols (Keres).”
As expected of the head of the administration, Granius quickly responded.
“All of them?”
“Yes.”
Granius glanced at me, looking a little surprised. However, there didn’t seem to be a big shift in his expression. Just then, I heard stuttering moans coming from the corner. Soricks seemed to be alternating his gaze between Granius and I. He might have been in shock at how informal I was being.
After a short while, all the templars in patrols were gathered in the aedile’s office, clueless to the reason why they were called to assemble. Many were visibly awkward standing in his office considering the fact that they would usually gather in the training grounds or the outer wings of the palace for their patrolling duties. And what they seemed to be the most awkward about was the fact that I was standing silently next to the aedile.
Clothes maketh a person. Good appearances open doors. That might not describe this situation to the tee but there was no denying that the clothes I was wearing seemed to have given me wings, disabling them from approaching me as easily as before. Instead of explaining myself, I just smiled.
Perhaps Granius seemed to have noticed my intentions. As I thought, perhaps it was wisdom that came with his age? Penne looked restless and Soricks hadn’t been able to wipe that grin off his face since the start of this meeting.
I took a step forward. Straightening my back and neck, I carefully scanned the room.
“My noblest mistress, this is the kind of status you should be getting used to.”
Alright, Rebecca. If this was the only way for me to move forward, I’d be happy to take a step.
“Hello, everyone. I’ll introduce myself again.”
At my friendly voice, the head of the patrols, Chosone, flinched and raised his head. It had been a while since I removed the bandage from my cheek. No, I hadn’t stuck it on my cheek the whole day today. This was me.
“The 8th Branch of the Empire.”
Wearing my dress calmly, I smiled graciously.
“I am Ashley Rosé, the 8th Princess.”
This was me. My smile seemed to have been imprinted on their minds as silence befell the room. No one dared to say anything. Some of those who had adored me had their eyes widened, their gaze lowered or the lips pressed together. However, they all looked either astonished or surprised.
“All of you.”
Tilting my head, I talked calmly.
“I apologise for asking this of you while you’re still flustered but there is something I need to ask you.”
Then, I glanced at Granius. Not too long ago, Granius had sworn to follow me. Until I got married and became a stranger to him.
“When I was very much younger, I had already enjoyed what the highest position had to offer. I have no more greed for power. So, it should be alright for me to support someone who is going to leave soon, right?”
Now, his grey eyes seemed certain that he had not been wrong to make that choice. Well, I had no clue whether the choice he made was right. Because I was only making this move to survive. No, now I was moving to save more people. The path I was taking to live was now turning to a way for me to save more people.
“Granius told me that he was going to follow me.”
To change the original story. No, did the original novel even exist? I could still recall it vividly even after nine years. There was nothing to stop me from just thinking that whatever happened so far had just been crazy coincidences. That was why I could only look forward.
“I wanted to ask you too.”
My endgame was to strip Castor of his position as the Crown Prince. To prevent him from becoming the emperor like how the original novel had written it out to be. I couldn’t do anything in his presence. Even though I had the ‘Power of the Lord’, I couldn’t become the emperor in his place. The empire had made it so that princesses could not become the emperor. But I had another way. The 2nd Prince.
The emperor who had everything but Rusbella. An emperor, who could handle the fact that he could not have everything lashed out and eventually destroyed his own Empire, did not deserve to be one. I will take everything from the man who ruined my life and throw him into the bottom of the abyss where he would rot alone.
“Princess, may I ask you something?”
With his trembling lips, the Commander of the patrols asked.
“… Is the energy I’m feeling from you what I think it is?”
I smiled with my arms crossed. In place of the silence, a brilliant white light wrapped around the room. Unable to hold back his excitement, someone’s divinity glowed softly. Soon after, a spectacular sight unravelled before me. As Chosone knelt on his knees and lowered his head, dozens of men followed suit. A heavy silence slowly rippled through the crowd in waves.
“I’m going to be supporting the 2nd Prince.”
It was enough for me to change the future. Castor will not have anything.
Castor had nothing but his position as the Crown Prince. I carefully formulated my plan. That was why I will be taking it away from him and giving it to the 2nd Prince.
My gaze met with someone’s. His back was lowered but it seemed as if he had yet to come to grips with reality. But the moment our eyes met, something else flashed by.
“Castor Dje Kaltanias.”
There was a rumour that you die the moment you speak his name. But that couldn’t be right. I convinced myself of what I had been thinking the entire morning. This was not a decision I made easily. I was afraid again. But for how long can I keep running away?
“I remember almost dying because of the Crown Prince and if the aedile hadn’t been there to save me, what you would’ve been seeing instead of me would be my gravestone.”
I will make myself known and no longer hide like my scar. I won’t just watch as he makes me and countless other people his play things.
“I’ve had people try to kill me countless times now. I don’t know why but I’ve come to know that I have the ‘Power of the Lords’.”
Though they weren’t just attempts, I had actually died before.
I scanned the room carefully and took a good look at each of their faces. I could sense their anger the moment I mentioned the attempts on my life.
“I ask this of you, the ones who defend justice. If this mad Crown Prince becomes the emperor and gets ahold of the Imperial power, what will he do with his strong divinity?”
A strange power took over the room. I had powers I had yet to even understand. But for some reason, I became more and more energised by my strength as I spoke.
“I may be a weak princess but I will not let madness take over this Empire.”
Silence as fragile as glass befell the room, threatening to shatter if anyone were to speak up. When I looked around the room, no one dared to make eye contact with me anymore. It felt a little lonely but this would be a sight I will be seeing more often in the future.
“Do I deserve to be your mistress?”
Just then, thump. Granius knelt on one knee.
“… I will follow you. Princess.”
Just as he did to me before, I will take everything from him. I had died dozens of times, And after surviving that, I had avoided hundreds of deaths. Finally, what I realised I could best do was to change the future.
Perhaps some people would die because of it. But it was up to me to protect them. I gazed upon those kneeling before me wistfully before quickly erasing the weakness from my eyes.
“I will be meeting the desert princess in the near future.”
I made up my mind.
“I want you. So be mine.”
Then, when he’s finally left alone, I will force the truth out of him.
Hannah widened her eyes.
“Y-Your meal?”
Considering the fact that my maids had been forcing me to eat the past few days, her shock was understandable. She nodded once and ran away before I could nag at her some more. She must have gone to pick up my food.
Now left alone, I stood up.
“Did I sleep too much?’
My fatigue could be explained by the excessive amount of sleep I had but my body also felt heavy as if I had just been drenched in water. Well, I had to admit my sleep had been terrible. Exhaustion had been guaranteed.
“That’s unavoidable.”
I might have overestimated myself. I believed–I thought I could get through anything. It wasn’t a belief that I had based on my hopes. Rather, it felt more like I had blindly believed that what I had been standing atop was solid ground.
But what I was actually standing on was the ground of a house standing precariously with no basement. When I first met the despair that was Castor, the ground had given way.
“The ability to regress and go through time loops. That’s a [curse] only the Heirs to the Lord of the Gods have.”
Upon Castor’s arrival, the ground beneath me collapsed helplessly and I was once again thrown into the abyss below without warning. My life had turned upside down like this once before–back when I had failed both my CSATs and my retake. Like those days of my past life, long, endless despair continued to draw me in.
“I’m the only one who knows how to break the curse.”
‘Be with me,’ despair whispered.
“But, Ashley, if I tell you, you’d leave me. Won’t you?”
Once I overcame a hurdle, another came searching for me. I closed my eyes. This had always been the case.
If even death could not end this chain of misfortunes, what should I do? Without being able to find an answer, I wandered aimlessly around my dream. I had slept like a log. A friend from my past life had theorised that trying to keep sleeping without end was a way for the body to protest against the world for the stress it was putting it through.
“Sleep…”
A long time ago, it had been easy to open my eyes in the morning. Especially when I was stressed, this habit of mine shone through. Early in the morning, at 8 am, whether it be for an exam or a morning meeting, I had never been late. But the fact remained that for the past few days I had slept as if I was dead. Perhaps it was because there were so many things I hadn’t wanted to face yet.
However, I couldn’t move forward while avoiding my misfortunes forever.
“In this entire world, this is something only you and I have”
Castor wanted me. Because he had the same curse as me? Because he needed me? I didn’t know why. However, for whatever goal he had, he had killed me more than 40 times without any hesitation. No, he destroyed me.
“That’s not love.”
I recalled what I had fearlessly said to the mad Crown Prince back when I had lost my memories. The love he believed to be love could never be love.
“The Lord of the Gods never loved the First Emperor. It was an obsession, not love.”
I wondered what he felt towards me? But it didn’t matter to me what he thought of me. But now I know for sure. In order for me to be truly free of him, only one of us could win. A victory that left no doubt as to who was the victor must be achieved.
No, I must be the one who wins.
“And in order to do that…”
I knew my strengths. And I knew what I had at my disposal. I glanced at the diary. The most evil being I had in my possession was also a companion that I shared my life with for the past few years. Like it or not, the diary had been stuck to my side for the past four years. After staring at the diary for a long time, I organised the information I had as I tapped on the back of the book before sweeping it down.
This was a world inside a novel. I had yet to confirm the existence of the female lead but what I knew of the novel so far was matching my reality. Even if I end up being some insane woman who persistently believed she was a character in a novel, most of the things I knew from the content of the original novel stayed true.
Until this point, I had been in a hurry to survive but now, I was going to be different.
Just like how Rebecca had changed her fate. If I had managed to change the ending of a villainess by making sure she didn’t fall for the tyrant, I could change the end of another character. And not only the end of a character but the end of this Empire. Just when Hannah re-entered the room, I had made up my mind.
“Princess, I have brought your meal.”
“Bring it here.”
After having gobbled up my food, I instructed Hannah to relay what I was about to say to Dane who had still been waiting for me.
“To wait for you?”
“Yes.”
Hannah asked where her princess was going. She seemed to be worrying about me since I just woke up. I reassured Hannah with a smile.
“I have a place to be. Prepare a carriage by the back entrance.”
Then, I sent Hannah away.
After changing my clothes and calling for Lena and Haina, the three of us headed to the back entrance. The place I was hurriedly heading to, after getting on the carriage waiting for me at the back entrance, was the 4th Administrative Office.
“No, not the back entrance. Head to the main gates.”
Instead of entering through the back entrance as I usually did, I glanced at the main gates and the driver whipped the horses accordingly without a word. He was a heavy-lipped man Dane sent me. Dane. The moment his name landed on my tongue, I quickly calmed down. For a moment, it had seemed as if the flame within me went out. I even thought I had been a little energised just a moment ago.
The officials at the administration seemed surprised at my sudden appearance. As I entered elegantly with my flowing dress, I glanced at each and every one of them. I strolled through the shock and astonishment like I had been walking on a path of flowers.
“Granius.”
When I finally arrived at his office, I also met the surprised Penne and Soricks. Ah, Soricks was here too. That was good. I turned away to face Granius.
“Please assemble all the templars in the patrols (Keres).”
As expected of the head of the administration, Granius quickly responded.
“All of them?”
“Yes.”
Granius glanced at me, looking a little surprised. However, there didn’t seem to be a big shift in his expression. Just then, I heard stuttering moans coming from the corner. Soricks seemed to be alternating his gaze between Granius and I. He might have been in shock at how informal I was being.
After a short while, all the templars in patrols were gathered in the aedile’s office, clueless to the reason why they were called to assemble. Many were visibly awkward standing in his office considering the fact that they would usually gather in the training grounds or the outer wings of the palace for their patrolling duties. And what they seemed to be the most awkward about was the fact that I was standing silently next to the aedile.
Clothes maketh a person. Good appearances open doors. That might not describe this situation to the tee but there was no denying that the clothes I was wearing seemed to have given me wings, disabling them from approaching me as easily as before. Instead of explaining myself, I just smiled.
Perhaps Granius seemed to have noticed my intentions. As I thought, perhaps it was wisdom that came with his age? Penne looked restless and Soricks hadn’t been able to wipe that grin off his face since the start of this meeting.
I took a step forward. Straightening my back and neck, I carefully scanned the room.
“My noblest mistress, this is the kind of status you should be getting used to.”
Alright, Rebecca. If this was the only way for me to move forward, I’d be happy to take a step.
“Hello, everyone. I’ll introduce myself again.”
At my friendly voice, the head of the patrols, Chosone, flinched and raised his head. It had been a while since I removed the bandage from my cheek. No, I hadn’t stuck it on my cheek the whole day today. This was me.
“The 8th Branch of the Empire.”
Wearing my dress calmly, I smiled graciously.
“I am Ashley Rosé, the 8th Princess.”
This was me. My smile seemed to have been imprinted on their minds as silence befell the room. No one dared to say anything. Some of those who had adored me had their eyes widened, their gaze lowered or the lips pressed together. However, they all looked either astonished or surprised.
“All of you.”
Tilting my head, I talked calmly.
“I apologise for asking this of you while you’re still flustered but there is something I need to ask you.”
Then, I glanced at Granius. Not too long ago, Granius had sworn to follow me. Until I got married and became a stranger to him.
“When I was very much younger, I had already enjoyed what the highest position had to offer. I have no more greed for power. So, it should be alright for me to support someone who is going to leave soon, right?”
Now, his grey eyes seemed certain that he had not been wrong to make that choice. Well, I had no clue whether the choice he made was right. Because I was only making this move to survive. No, now I was moving to save more people. The path I was taking to live was now turning to a way for me to save more people.
“Granius told me that he was going to follow me.”
To change the original story. No, did the original novel even exist? I could still recall it vividly even after nine years. There was nothing to stop me from just thinking that whatever happened so far had just been crazy coincidences. That was why I could only look forward.
“I wanted to ask you too.”
My endgame was to strip Castor of his position as the Crown Prince. To prevent him from becoming the emperor like how the original novel had written it out to be. I couldn’t do anything in his presence. Even though I had the ‘Power of the Lord’, I couldn’t become the emperor in his place. The empire had made it so that princesses could not become the emperor. But I had another way. The 2nd Prince.
The emperor who had everything but Rusbella. An emperor, who could handle the fact that he could not have everything lashed out and eventually destroyed his own Empire, did not deserve to be one. I will take everything from the man who ruined my life and throw him into the bottom of the abyss where he would rot alone.
“Princess, may I ask you something?”
With his trembling lips, the Commander of the patrols asked.
“… Is the energy I’m feeling from you what I think it is?”
I smiled with my arms crossed. In place of the silence, a brilliant white light wrapped around the room. Unable to hold back his excitement, someone’s divinity glowed softly. Soon after, a spectacular sight unravelled before me. As Chosone knelt on his knees and lowered his head, dozens of men followed suit. A heavy silence slowly rippled through the crowd in waves.
“I’m going to be supporting the 2nd Prince.”
It was enough for me to change the future. Castor will not have anything.
Castor had nothing but his position as the Crown Prince. I carefully formulated my plan. That was why I will be taking it away from him and giving it to the 2nd Prince.
My gaze met with someone’s. His back was lowered but it seemed as if he had yet to come to grips with reality. But the moment our eyes met, something else flashed by.
“Castor Dje Kaltanias.”
There was a rumour that you die the moment you speak his name. But that couldn’t be right. I convinced myself of what I had been thinking the entire morning. This was not a decision I made easily. I was afraid again. But for how long can I keep running away?
“I remember almost dying because of the Crown Prince and if the aedile hadn’t been there to save me, what you would’ve been seeing instead of me would be my gravestone.”
I will make myself known and no longer hide like my scar. I won’t just watch as he makes me and countless other people his play things.
“I’ve had people try to kill me countless times now. I don’t know why but I’ve come to know that I have the ‘Power of the Lords’.”
Though they weren’t just attempts, I had actually died before.
I scanned the room carefully and took a good look at each of their faces. I could sense their anger the moment I mentioned the attempts on my life.
“I ask this of you, the ones who defend justice. If this mad Crown Prince becomes the emperor and gets ahold of the Imperial power, what will he do with his strong divinity?”
A strange power took over the room. I had powers I had yet to even understand. But for some reason, I became more and more energised by my strength as I spoke.
“I may be a weak princess but I will not let madness take over this Empire.”
Silence as fragile as glass befell the room, threatening to shatter if anyone were to speak up. When I looked around the room, no one dared to make eye contact with me anymore. It felt a little lonely but this would be a sight I will be seeing more often in the future.
“Do I deserve to be your mistress?”
Just then, thump. Granius knelt on one knee.
“… I will follow you. Princess.”
Just as he did to me before, I will take everything from him. I had died dozens of times, And after surviving that, I had avoided hundreds of deaths. Finally, what I realised I could best do was to change the future.
Perhaps some people would die because of it. But it was up to me to protect them. I gazed upon those kneeling before me wistfully before quickly erasing the weakness from my eyes.
“I will be meeting the desert princess in the near future.”
I made up my mind.
“I want you. So be mine.”
Then, when he’s finally left alone, I will force the truth out of him.
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